=== ANCHOR POEM ===
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│ CW: mental-health │
└──────────────────────┘
me, yesterday: "ugh I'm so sad, I'm just gonna not post all these things that
I absurdly noised"
me, today: "omg instant ramen is delicious I can't remember why I was ever sad"
all that separates me from my pit of despair is calories, it seems. Empty ones
too! I should probably handle that haha
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=== SIMILARITY RANKED ===
--- #1 fediverse/3483 ---
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sometimes I think about how it'll never be yesterday again and that makes me
kinda sad.
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--- #2 fediverse/922 ---
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┌──────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-sorta-cursed-i-meant-saline │
└──────────────────────────────────────┘
the best thing about ramen noodles is how much of them you can eat. they're so
cheap~! why would you not make like four packages
oh wait now my blood is salty T.T guess I'll just have to cry it out
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--- #3 fediverse/2286 ---
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┌──────────────────────────┐
│ CW: uspol-food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────────┘
... dangit, these sandwiches are getting kinda gross. Guess I'm gonna have to
eat them myself, which, uh... idk what I expected xD
sometimes you just have all this energy, right? and you don't know what to do
with it, so... sandwiches. And hey, sandwiches are cool, they're a pretty neat
anti-hunger tool! but uhhhh idk if I really want to eat six whole sandwiches
myself. I'm gonna do it though hehe wish me luck [ding] ah nuts my rice and
beans are done, hang on lemme eat those first
[passes out from exhaustion]
exhaustion can be cured with a nap
exertion can be cured with water and a few rest days
trauma can be allayed for at least a few days with soul food and compassion.
maybe laughter too, depending on the mood.
fear can be bolstered with a smile, a wink, and a courageous act,
and loss is just change you didn't consent to.
they won't consent too, so let's give them some change to tolerate.
[internally salivating over all the piles of weaponry that I envision them
surrendering]
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--- #4 fediverse/4968 ---
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"ugh ramen is so nutritionally empty. Like, okay, dehydrated noodles and salty
powdered broth, what can your body do with that?"
um, make soup?
... sorry I wasn't paying attention, what were you saying?
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--- #5 fediverse/3128 ---
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┌─────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: mental-health-disordered-eating │
└─────────────────────────────────────┘
I never should have bought these crackers. They trick me into thinking I'm
eating something nutritious.
But that's the case with any empty calories.
but hey, calories are calories, right?
I guess that's true. Still, I'd rather make something.
oh would you now would you REALLY rather MAKE something
... I should rather.
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--- #6 fediverse/3645 ---
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me, sitting down at my computer in order to be distracted:
"I should make and eat a sandwich"
me, sitting down at my computer with a PB&J and peanut-butter fingers:
"I should be productive"
me, sitting at my "work desk":
"I'm hungry. And I'm bored. And I can't stop thinking about this video game I
haven't played in a year."
repeat
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--- #7 fediverse/2991 ---
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okay so if yesterday was a
"everything sucks and I'm the worst ever"
type of day, and today is a
"whatever mom I don't even care"
type of day, that means tomorrow will be a
"I can't believe how absolutely absurd I am"
type of day, and the day after a
"I am indomitable nothing can stop me"
kind of day, with the following being wildcards
... right? here's hoping. I like that trajectory.
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--- #8 fediverse/4251 ---
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@user-192
is it weird that I pictured a can of diced tomatoes from Costco sitting in a
salad? strained of course
juicy dressing 🥴
[self indulgent writing, apologies]
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--- #9 fediverse/5092 ---
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"you know what this dish needs? some ramen noodle seasoning. Hang on, I think
I got some in my junk drawer."
said nobody ever
everyone knows there isn't just ONE junk drawer, but several hundred. They
multiply in the middle of the night, but it's by such a small constant factor
(0.015 ish according to our top scientists) that you don't notice until it
"flips the bit" and hits the new landmark which marks the miles since you got
stoned.
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--- #10 fediverse/5142 ---
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"you know what this dish needs? some ramen noodle seasoning. Hang on, I think
I got some in my junk drawer."
said nobody ever
everyone knows there isn't just ONE junk drawer, but several hundred. They
multiply in the middle of the night, but it's by such a small constant factor
(0.015 ish according to our top scientists) that you don't notice until it
"flips the bit" and hits the new landmark which marks the miles since you got
stoned.
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--- #11 fediverse/4079 ---
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"... honestly, it's a little sad"
"yeah, you're not wrong"
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--- #12 fediverse/3618 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
they say fat people are jolly, which makes me wonder if the only reason I'm
often sad is because I'm too skinny.
I need an italian grandma to feed me butter and pasta T.T
eat somethin' why don'tcha you're skin an' bones, kid
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--- #13 fediverse/2164 ---
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I completely lack noodles in my home at this time! That hardly ever happened
before! I should go to the store. I wonder why fate won't let me go to the
store these past few months except for like once or twice?
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--- #14 fediverse/3691 ---
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│ CW: food-mentioned │
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I had a dream that someone fed me a McDonalds burger in the airport (with
"special sauce") and then the next time I was at the grocery store in the
waking world I ended up buying a bunch of those meat replacements that I
usually skip in favor of moar vegetables.
Hmmmmm.... I wonder if I have a deficiency
(yeah you dumbass it's a calorie deficiency, just eat more)
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--- #15 fediverse/6018 ---
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I feel so sad, like I'm missing something precious to me... I hope someone
knows who to take it to. Like the world is just a bit darker and more mundane.
ah, well, maybe it's just perception bias. When things leave your timeline
(temporarily or permanently) they take their inertial influence with them.
It's okay to mourn the loss of a friend, of a relic, or an opportunity. So
long as you continue to nurture light, life, and hope wherever you go, the
magic will return and continue to flow. If you believe that, then you know
what faith is. easy enough...
please be worth it
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--- #16 fediverse/4653 ---
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┌───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned-sleeping-mentioned │
└───────────────────────────────────────┘
phew, just got back from a long nap and I had such a lovely dream! Gonna write
down everything I can remember in my dream journal, will letcha know when I
have something to share.
Also... sorry about the sun. I have no idea if it was worth it because I woke
up quite a bit later. Ah well anyway gotta do some writing, I hope everyone
has a pleasant day. Make sure you eat nutrients and stay hydrated and do your
stretches and work on your posture and all that.
vegetables have minerals, fruits have vitamins, rice-and-beans or meat have
protein, and oils and fats have calories. try and eat a lot of different
colors of veggies and a lot of different colors of fruits (a green fruit and a
green vegetable are not necessarily the same nutritionally)
well brb goodnight gonna drink some water
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--- #17 fediverse/353 ---
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┌──────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: Trans yearning hrt-mentioned │
└──────────────────────────────────────┘
@user-255
sooooooon, all things in time. Someday you'll be like me - I can't even
remember why I was so upset about that whole "dysphoria" thing. Like looking
back it seems like a minor annoyance, but when I first came out it was all I
could think about. Don't be jealous - just wait! It'll happen to you!
Celebrate the euphoria, I also can't really remember that too well. I'm just
normal now, minus my weekly shot.
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--- #18 fediverse/4551 ---
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┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: mental-health-mentioned-in-relation-to-resisting-capitalism │
└─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
oh no I'm feeling, uh... "depressed" or "manic depressed" or something else,
you pick this time, better go hide and work on organizational technology which
utilizes Risc-V hardware, fediverse software, LLM based anonymization, and
SoCs with multiple ethernet ports, oh nooooo how boring and depressing, if
only someone or several people who were bored and feeling like resisting
capitalism wanted to help out, all they'd have to do is get in touch with me
anyway bye
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--- #19 fediverse/3611 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
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I wish they sold ramen noodle seasoning by the jar and ramen noodles by the
package (without seasoning)
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--- #20 fediverse/1603 ---
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@user-1037
I made a picture, hope it helps! I swear I didn't hallucinate this thing but
it might be less cool than I thought and I might have misremembered and made
up parts of it, I can't tell because it was such a short memory : (
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--- #21 fediverse/3481 ---
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│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
instant ramen noodles are an ingredient, not a dish
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--- #22 fediverse/1796 ---
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┌──────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned-cursing-mentioned │
└──────────────────────────────────────┘
I'm just now realizing that my favorite ramen seasoning is essentially salt,
MSG, and a fuckload of smoked paprika. I don't know how to feel about that.
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--- #23 fediverse/2297 ---
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Lying wide awake at night with things that I want to say drifting through my
mind one by one
getting up to write them down? forgetting them all.
I think I'm just gonna leave my computer online to reduce friction hehe.
up and down, till everyone's in town, maybe I'll nap between tweets.
[they're called toots here, dummy]
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--- #24 fediverse/795 ---
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│ CW: re: mh- │
└──────────────────────┘
@user-8
I get that. I don't cry anymore except in my imagination. Sometimes it helps
to imagine myself doing it though, like some kind of mental catharsis.
the body gets left out but at least the mind is soothed.
I usually am most upset when I'm lonely. Maybe you could find someone to hold
you close? I hope you feel better sooner rather than later.
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--- #25 fediverse/4995 ---
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Went outside today for the first time in a week to take out my trash to the
bin. Dunno why but I've been feeling a little down about my apartment, and how
they can just take my home from me because I oh hang on I wrote a poem about
this one sec: [boosts old poem]
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--- #26 notes/what-are-breakups-for ---
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
listen... if you break up with a friend, OF COURSE you should cry.
OF COURSE you'll be sad.
it's okay.
it's natural. it's human.
don't feel sad about the pain. feel the pain.
brb getting smashed
(okay but please put some clothes on)
-.- fine
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
I can't fucking relax
the only thing I can think of is defeating fascism
this fucking sucks
I just want to cry about my boyfriend of what, 6 years??
jeez
like.... yeah I'm flawed
*of course* I'm flawed
I'm a human being
humans are imperfect
... ugh
er, sorry, "bleurg"
I'm going to eat a burrito
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
alright ate an edible. 20mg. had 2 beers. that's enough for me.
see ya soon. I swear to you, I will be there tomorrow. and every day
henceforth.
... unless I'm taking a day off, like yesterday, which TBH was probably not
ideal.
I swear I'll be better.
there are no false starts, only probing strikes.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
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--- #27 fediverse/2104 ---
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@user-192
oooooo yeah I usually try and reply to my old post with any new information. I
never get the chance to think the same thoughts twice because when I was
younger I had problems with thought-loops where I'd think something like "darn
I could have handled that social situation better" and before you know it I'd
be rocking myself to sleep trying to stop thinking negative thoughts about
myself.
So I broke my brain a little and now I can't think the same thing more than
once, which is part of why it's so hard for me to finish projects. Alas.
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--- #28 fediverse/4189 ---
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when people are kind to me, I start feeling sad.
I don't know why.
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--- #29 fediverse/961 ---
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║ hmmmm let's see, what shall I do today? │
║ │
║ first I should get out of bed, │
║ │
║ then I should clean my self, │
║ │
║ then I should feed my self, │
║ │
║ then I should stare at the wall for an hour or three because there's too many │
║ thoughts, │
║ │
║ then perhaps I'll play a strategic video game because at least that's a │
║ productive way to exercise my brain │
║ │
║ I should probably get back to my friends, │
║ │
║ and oh dear my cat wants some attention. │
║ │
║ This place is a mess, let me just clean a bit │
║ │
║ now I'm so tired I accidentally take a nap. │
║ │
║ Good morning! Oh, it's the afternoon. Well, time for more food. │
║ │
║ After handling the essentials, I can tuck in and relax │
║ │
║ by doomscrolling on Mastodon. │
║ │
║ Then perhaps a bit later I'll message my boyfriend (he won't respond) │
║ │
║ and boy are there so many of these dirty dishes! │
║ │
║ Well, standing up is exhausting, │
║ │
║ so I should probably fall back asleep. │
║ │
║ What a productive day we've been having, │
║ │
║ for all of this past week. │
║ │
║ Maybe I'll do some drawing, maybe a poem or two │
║ │
║ maybe I'll run out of characters in this toot, or m │
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║ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #30 fediverse/5636 ---
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I think it's ironic how I ended up posting a "things I almost posted"
screenshot directory somewhere other than where I almost posted them.
and all they saw were the outtakes.
I bet they'd see a completely different point of me,
but they never talk to me
so they don't know me.
oh well, alas, it's fine I'm sure I'm being designed.
who can say, I am but at productive play, please react so I can do ongoing
story. I learn from each and every encounter I encounterate.
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--- #31 fediverse/1040 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
so it shall seem that sticks and mud are for me
I say as I sit in my apartment eating rice and beans
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--- #32 fediverse/727 ---
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Me: "yeah but how can you know that food is vegetarian? They could put
anything they want on the box."
them: "well yes but you see here are the regulations we have in place through
the USDA and (department of agriculture) and these and these inspectors and
this and that procedure and here read through this report with charts and
graphs and diagrams and"
me: "and they say the government is inefficient. Look at all this progress!
Wow so productive. So healthy and raw. So prime and"
they: [not listening]
me: "nuts"
[eats "beef" flavored ramen]
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--- #33 fediverse/2288 ---
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... zzz ZZZ zzz ...
I gotta lotta things to eat, but I'm so tired and kinda dirty. Maybe a shower
first. TTYL
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--- #34 fediverse/3434 ---
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┌─────────────────────────┐
│ CW: mental-health-minus │
└─────────────────────────┘
me: "I don't care what anyone thinks as long as I'm a force for good"
also me: "if anyone doesn't like me ever I'll throw myself off a bridge"
also me: "hey watch this" dissolves into a puddle of acid
also me: "the most important thing is to be good and learn lessons" what
lessons are you learning from this post? "um. that I shouldn't?" ... shouldn't
learn? "no, shouldn't post" -.-
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--- #35 fediverse/921 ---
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@user-633
:O
I'm vegetarian, but this reminded me that I could just put bouillon in boiling
water and drink that xD
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--- #36 fediverse/5173 ---
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┌────────────────────────┐
│ CW: politics-mentioned │
└────────────────────────┘
I almost said "did you know chickens don't always know which eggs they're
sitting on? They pretty much just share spots and keep all of the flock's eggs
warm"
but then I realized I should first say "did you know that chickens sit on eggs
to keep warm" and I got a little sad because... chickens...
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--- #37 fediverse/2939 ---
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"you look like a mess who can't take care of herself"
oh haha that's because I'm a mess who can't take care of herself
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--- #38 fediverse/5602 ---
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"so wait why can't we go outside again"
"I'm huuuuungry"
girl we just ate
"I'm tired"
girl it's like 10am
"can we snuggle?"
yeah okay.
that's why haha
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--- #39 fediverse/169 ---
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@user-95 one of the most empathetic people I ever met on VR chat was consoling
me with their mic off while I was oversharing about some stupid things people
did to me in the past. things that stupid me thought were okay and actively
encouraged because I was stupid. anyway when their mic was off their body
language spoke for them. I'll try that next time.
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--- #40 fediverse/3925 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
most people, when they run out of toothpaste:
"oh huh I should buy more"
me, when I run out of toothpaste:
"verily in three monthes time, when I shall next possess toothpaste, I shall
forsoothe brush TWICE as hard and TWICE as often, to make up for the holes
inflicted upon my teeth. Innest addittioneth, no more candy shallest be
eateneth untileth ye toothpasteth be acquiredeth"
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────┘
--- #41 fediverse/4540 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
most people in the world are dumb as a bag of bricks
but that's okay, I still love them, and so should you.
everyone I hang out with is sharp as a tack
and I love them still, for I don't have a preference for blunt objects.
some people don't feel emotions
I think they're just depressed
some people can't stop
won't stop, I say.
really as long as they follow their heart and sing a tune that is true
I think they're alright.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘
--- #42 fediverse/4744 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: cat-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
me to my cat: "don't eat so much that you puke, okay?"
me to me: "yeah I can take on another task, I'm almost done with this one and
then I'll just do that one and maybe this one'll get back to me at the same
time as this one which conflicts with this other thing so maybe I'll just
puke, okay?"
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────┘
--- #43 fediverse/814 ---
╔══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┐
║ ah that's weird, I don't usually cry. I wonder what's going on. I should │
║ probably put myself on psychiatric drugs. Surely it's an expression of the │
║ implementation of my impending doom. │
║ │
║ ... what are you even saying bro │
║ │
║ ... um, hang on feels like some of the circuitry is off. is something wrong in │
║ my brain? yeah that's surely it, surely nothing I say would resoinate with │
║ anyone that has a non-malfunctioning brain. Surely I don't speak of logical │
║ failures in the hard founded truths of our asset [society I think? like, our │
║ conditions, our institutions, our {gosh that just... does not translate}] um │
║ right what was I saying │
║ │
║ oh yeah there's this game I'm really into called Knave, it's like D&D │
║ except the rules are very fewer. Like there's onyl 11 pages in the rulebook │
║ and it's mostly taken up by random roll tables. Like, everything boings down │
║ to a few simple rules, like rock paper scissors, or go-fish, or something like │
║ that with just afew mechanids. something timeless and pure, something that is │
║ isolated and en │
╟─────────┐ ┌───────────┤
║ similar │ chronological │ different │
╚═════════╧═══════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┴──────────┘
--- #44 fediverse/184 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food │
└──────────────────────┘
sigh alright look. I'll make you a sandwich just this once but you really
gotta get your cravings under control. this should be a "sometimes" thing for
special occasions. what's that? you want clean clothes and a shower? get outta
here
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────┘
--- #45 fediverse/2402 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
Just got home, and I'm less tired than yesterday! ^_^ maybe a bit more
delirious then, hhah - I'll drink more water
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘
--- #46 fediverse/3539 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
┌──────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: disordered-eating-food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────────────────────┘
@user-192
Good point it's sooooooo salty
I have fond memories of eating a spoonful of that instead of making food back
in college because... hey, it's got vegetables in it, right?
turns out it's mostly just salt with flavor
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┘
--- #47 fediverse/1841 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
curling up in a ball and thinking about crying for hours is the same as
crying. If a little bit less of a release.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #48 fediverse/5793 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────
I posted my words text file all over the c it y today. not sure why. maybe I'm
tired of this course and I don't want to let anyone down? Maybe I don't know
what to do yet. Maybe nobody works with me because everyone's keeping it on
the DL or whateverr?
... anyway enough typing, I'm going to go play a video game. like god intended.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────┘
--- #49 fediverse/1281 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
@user-883
okay I'm down
(a little stoned tho, was talking to my soul hehe)
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #50 fediverse/3578 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
It's so sad how some of the best games ever made get glossed over because the
fun you remember is the friendship and fantasy you felt rather than the game
itself
time marches forward, and culture changes to no longer fit the old tools quite
right. Plus they look like PS1 graphics ewwwwww look at those muddy textures
and blocky bits arranged into triangles and meshes! how dorky, how retro
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┘
--- #51 fediverse/6111 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
whoops forgot to post these last night, how silly of me, surely there wasn't a
reason I better just hit that blue button on all of them to be safe
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────┘
--- #52 fediverse/1612 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────
@user-1040
also, I miss most of the names and faces in this archive and I think it'd be
neat to say "oh yeah I remember them because it wasn't so long ago and it's
weird how they're not around these days but I forgot about them because their
profile pic changed or maybe they stopped using mastodon or whatever" - idk it
feels empty sometimes because your follow list is always growing, but the
number of people who post seems to always go down. Or maybe I just read
Mastodon at unfortunate times when there's nothing going on. Who can say
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────┘
--- #53 fediverse/1019 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
┌────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: food/eating(-), re: mh(--) │
└────────────────────────────────────┘
@user-473
unsolicited family recipe:
kambybalunga
peanut butter, oats, something sweet (dried raisins, cherries preferred, but
chocolate chips works in a pinch) and honey or (real) maple syrup. (No corn
syrup allowed.)
mix it up, put whatever else you want in it. Free healthy depression food from
my dad.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #54 fediverse/4692 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────
what's that? a bunch of houses burnt down in california? what if we built a
couple warehouses and stored all our trans girls in bunkbeds there, with rooms
for LAN parties and snuggle parties in rooms full of stuffed buddies plushies
with massive kitchens and sad ballpits where you can go to vent your feelings
by writing on a ball with a sharpie and then when someone else is feeling sad
they can come and read the balls and maybe feel something
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────┘
--- #55 fediverse/2034 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
@user-889
this post inspired me to make soup for myself. thanks, I haven't been eating
well recently.
sometimes you gotta be your own friend. "you in the future" is both you, and
someone else, and if you're kind to her she'll appreciate it.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #56 fediverse/3531 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
I love ramen but I don't like how it makes me feel after eating it
:ms_confused:
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #57 fediverse/4486 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
gonna go on a walk. my cat is missing because I let her out last night. I'm
worried sick! this morning I almost puked all over my toes.
she'll probably show up when it gets dark. I bet she's hunkered down
somewhere. Ah, well, might as well walk around my neighborhood actively
searching bushes and such. Why not? It's not like I got anything else to do
right now.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘
--- #58 fediverse/938 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
@user-649
same... sometimes it feels like I step on toes that I didn't know existed! I
got tired of walking on egg shells so now I just try and religiously put
content warnings on things that feel intense.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘
--- #59 fediverse/2350 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
I spent about two hours today (and a good chunk of tomorrow's stamina) chasing
a rabbit through a field. Can't help but wonder if that particular lead wasn't
as important as leading from the front. Ah, well, we'll see.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘
--- #60 fediverse/3253 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
it's so weird how these days if you don't like someone you can exclude them
from your social life entirely - like, wow... that hurts
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘
--- #61 fediverse/6191 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────
oh nuts, I forgot to post these last night. sorry... here ya go:
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────┘
--- #62 fediverse/3616 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
menardis will literally eat cheetos and ramen for dinner and wonder why they
feel exhausted the next day
drink some damn water
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┘
--- #63 fediverse/5201 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────
@user-192
is okay, girl
time will be richer sooner
don't poop your pants just yet
remember, good is just a shade of gray away from silver which you can use to
line your pockets with tinfoil hats
beep boop computer touchers anonymous called they said they want their secret
handshake back
if you wanna diss your associates go ahead but I sure as heck love my rad-ical
com-patriots just as much as I love my ice-cream salad friend witches
... whoops there I go being insane again, hope you feel better friend
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #64 fediverse/3455 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
┌───────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-quartermastery-mentioned │
└───────────────────────────────────┘
when you run out of an ingredient you use often (like butter, seasoning, or
flour) put the container by your shoes.
then, when you go to the store, look through all the empty containers and make
a mental list.
when you get home and are putting things away, if you forgot something just
leave the old container by the door. everything else can be recycled / trashed.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #65 fediverse/4066 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
the lawful good in me says "clean up that spill you just made"
the chaotic good in me says "throw a brick at a cop car"
and the part of me that listens says "uhhhhh okay somewhere in the middle of
those two points is "ignore the spill and the cops and just finish making your
ramen I guess?" and frankly that's the one I'm more likely to listen to" and
frankly that's the one I'm more likely to listen to.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #66 fediverse/1214 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: death-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
some day, the past will exist only in the media made in that era and the
threads that it left in that which came later.
for now, it still persists in our memories. But we shall die, and with us our
recollections. How sad, that the eras before us shall depart upon our graves.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘
--- #67 fediverse/2954 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
whenever my cat is whining I walk around doing things that she might want
until she stops trying to claw me - oh you want your litter cleaned? yeah sure
I gotchu. oh you wanna go outside? nah okay how about playing with this yarn?
no? okay let's see... oh dear you can see the bottom of your food bowl,
conveniently forgetting the other mostly full food bowl over there... 😅
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘
--- #68 fediverse/5782 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────
sometimes I post random silly [scary] things to pad out the serious things and
I hope that's okay
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────┘
--- #69 fediverse_boost/5655 ---
◀─╔══════════════════════════════[BOOST]═══════════════════════════════──────────╗
║ ┌────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐ ║
║ │ I'm crying over the fact, that me, or folks around me aren't capable of organizing jailbreaks. │ ║
║ │ │ ║
║ │ And we aren't even trying 😢 │ ║
║ │ │ ║
║ │ I clearly have been taken major wrong steps in my life that I ended where I am now. │ ║
║ │ │ ║
║ │ I am sorry. │ ║
║ │ │ ║
║ │ Yes sure we say abolish prisons, but without attack it will never materialize. │ ║
║ └────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ ║
╠─────────┐ ┌───────────╣
║ similar │ chronological │ different ║
╚═════════╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──┴───────╝─▶
--- #70 fediverse/4068 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
there will always be people who shine in moments of strife
yet those people will inevitably fail, just as a toothbrush bristle looses
it's strength or a pencil loses it's lead
the trick is to test them in times of peace, so you can know their value
during times that lack it, the trick is to replace them before they become
stalin
never forget that power corrupts, yet power must be wielded by the worthy,
else we fall into shame and despair.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘
--- #71 fediverse/2562 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: rich-apologia │
└──────────────────────┘
among all the others, I want a wonderful and fulfilling life for the
socialite. they deserve light just as you and I might.
"eat the rich" bruh there's like, 100 people who are running the show.
everyone else is basically just a syncophant who's trying to get ahead and
stay working.
then there's like their families and such and like... they didn't do anything
wrong, they just eat cheese and wine and laugh at memes all day with their
besties.
they are basically pets
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘
--- #72 fediverse/5029 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
went on a walk with my dad today. it was fun. took him to various places.
showed off various things. "hey check out where I hangout most weekends" and
"hey don't clean the dishes in my kitchen it's okay" and "don't drive too
fast, this area curves up ahead" and "hey meet my friends from town who you
have something with common with" and "I like this view when it rains" and
"don't forget to go to the bathroom" and "oatmeal is good with carrots and
sharp dried fruits" and "here's my favorite thai place" and "I made this after
I dreamed of you" and "hey wanna hear my product pitch" and "this is my
favorite kind of beer" and "I miss home."
picture unrelated.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────┘
--- #73 fediverse/1381 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
┌────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: death-mentioned-nuts-mentioned │
└────────────────────────────────────┘
I'm a bit of a narcissist because I had a lot of... alone time as a kid, and I
was a bit starved for attention.
but I'm also afraid of rejection so if you have anything to say I'll listen
for hours and try to be what you need me to be and give what you need me to
give so that you don't leave me.
Also, nobody has ever hurt me. And so I trust wholely and completely and
absolutely. I get logically why that's not a good move but frankly I'd rather
die than be cooperative. ah nuts better add a content warning.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘
--- #74 messages/1063 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────
What if instead of listing food in our ingredients as a paragraph we instead
listed them in tab-separated-rows-by-columns like excel spreadsheets except
with justifications for everything has its place in the ingredient dish.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────┘
--- #75 fediverse/4682 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────
Ugh. This outfit is sooooo preschool. Oh well, it'll have to do.
"girl it's so cute what are you talking about"
oh, y'know, internalized repression I guess. Do you think the tanktop on top
of a longsleeved shirt is too much? How about the skirt over sweatpants? Is
the bow in my hair too cute for you?
"who are you talking to I already said I was all about it"
... the mirror. Trying to psyche myself up.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────┘
--- #76 fediverse/1889 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
@user-1091
I'm sorry I didn't mean to be upsetting! I'll try and be more considerate. If
everyone agrees there's never anything to talk about besides how great
everyone else is, and that's boring, so... I'm sorry I thought you liked what
I was saying from the stars on my comments.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘
--- #77 fediverse/861 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
I can't remember any of my pinky swears. Like, not a single one. I feel like I
could get in trouble if I renounced errr, instead made human mistakes and
forgot information that wasn't relevant anymore. phew that was close, almost a
disaster, anyway how's your lunch?
[that's not fair it's always lunch somewhere on earth]
reality is a form of eternal computation, a continuous re-updating of stored
matter (data). also, values of fields, (like rules and regulations), would
determine the structural complexity and organizational expectencencies.
I miss my family. I miss the past, that can never be revisited, [every time
you remember a memory it writes over it. virtually guaranteeing that you'll
only preserve limited information that slowly degrades. how slowly is up to
you...
once you run out of memories, it's bad news for your life. but GOOD NEWS, that
only happens for certain mental health conditions that primarily target the
elderly. For most people it's a continuous process because you're cared for and
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘
--- #78 messages/309 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────
sometimes I'll accidentally get food on my hands and think "oh gross is this
why humans like to have napkins handy when eating?"
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────┘
--- #79 fediverse/5698 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────
you can't rely on me because I can't rely on a part of me being "out" at any
particular moment-event-message.
besides, I'm always tired, because I'm always trying as hard as I can.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────┘
--- #80 fediverse/1895 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
┌─────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: C-programming-and-alcohol-mentioned │
└─────────────────────────────────────────────┘
@user-1074
yeah drinking's overrated. I know I'd rather eat a home-cooked meal any day.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #81 fediverse/3823 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────
"sometimes I don't want to be optimistic sometimes I just want to complain"
oh yeah well what if I want to be optimistic at all times as a coping
mechanism huh you don't have to agree with me
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┘
--- #82 fediverse/1853 ---
╔═════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────┐
║ I really really love ramen noodles that are just a little bit old but still │
║ warm and are slightly drying out a little bit but there's juuuuust enough │
║ sauce down at the bottom to keep it coated │
║ │
║ that's the stuff │
║ │
║ (meanwhile my evil side says: it starts with "hey can you help me cook dinner" │
║ and then suddenly you're working all day every day) │
║ │
║ (and then so are they) │
║ │
║ (and it continues.....) │
║ │
║ (... until.... ) │
║ │
║ (one day you wake up and there's nothing you are capable to do) │
║ │
║ (so then you're useless) │
║ │
║ (and demanding) │
║ │
║ (and that's hard to handle) │
║ │
║ (when your schedule is blocked, and there's nothing you are capable to do) │
║ │
║ ... weird, kinda drifted off for a second, anyway we should talk about │
║ BIRTHDAYS! Birthdays are fun, theyre the day when you switch from being one │
║ age to another. Like, rolling over a clock, or ticking-up a variable in │
║ response to another variable which is at capacity. │
║ │
║ buffer overflows would be impossible if you put import/export controls on │
║ registers │
║ │
║ not "you can't do that" but "wheres your cre │
╟─────────┐ ┌───────────┤
║ similar │ chronological │ different │
╚═════════╧══════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────┴──────────┘
--- #83 fediverse/677 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
@user-78
I read about half of this:
https://jo.wtf/6d.html
before I was consumed by the intense urge to prop myself up on a pillow and
listen to you rant at the ceiling at 4am about gravity or the cosmos or
whatever you were thinking about prior to speaking your heart
and then I'd write it down, and cherish every moment of it as I shared it with
my peers and we tried to analyze just what you meant
[sorry for being gay on your timeline]
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #84 fediverse/2290 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: a device design that may have lewd implications │
└─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
@user-1153
congratulations, you invented humanoid robots! And hey they come in so many
shapes and colors, plus you can run them on nothing but rice, beans, and
nutrient paste. They're quite efficient at their jobs!
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #85 fediverse/1535 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────
I only take things that aren't mine if they're in the trash. Or near the
trash. Or in a store.
so weird how the store won't let me leave until I give them some of my
dollars. This quartermaster drives a hard bargain!
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #86 messages/656 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
... I'm going to sit in bed and eat cheetos all day.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #87 fediverse/5452 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────
┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: all-cops-are-bastards-mentioned-personal-ramblings-and-complainings-mentioned │
└──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
I never rest. Not mentally. I find it sooooo much harder to get moving again
once I'm asleep.
But I've been sleeping lately, because it's "good for me" or whatever. Because
I'm "burnt out and need to heal" or something.
Damnit why is it so much harder to stop snuggling someone than it is to pack
up a tent?
I'm like the guy in Hot Fuzz, that one really good movie about cops. oops cops
mentioned one second.
I'm always moving, but, I hardly ever seem to be able to get anything done.
Why is that? Is the work just... endless? Am I ever a slave to my
surroundings? Or am I just cursed with a mortal form, a form destined to toil
in whatever way it finds itself contextualized in?
Maybe I should just stop complaining. Maybe work is it's own reward or
whatever. I don't think I'm depressed anymore, although good luck getting me
to feel any emotions except focus, and the call to intercede on another's
behalf.
I don't have time for this. >.
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--- #88 fediverse/5853 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────
everyone's all like "everything sucks" but I'm feeling confidence and a kind
of... externalized vigor? that's sweeping me off my feet. We'll see what
tomorrow brings, in the general sense.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────┘
--- #89 fediverse/3437 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
┌─────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: mental-health-minus │
└─────────────────────────────┘
@user-579
my problem is figuring out which thoughts are intrusive and which are actually
mine
I usually err on the side of "would you want your sister to do this" or "how
would you feel if your mom told you that" or "do you think a cute sweet soft
cat would ever think such a thing" and that usually works.
usually.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #90 fediverse/5403 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────
I expect nothing less from my people and prepare for theirs to be dumb as
bricks.
I am often disappointed in both directions, but that's okay, because I planned
for that too! Maybe that wasn't too smart of me, but I'd expect nothing less
than dumb mistakes made once from myself 😋 🥴 :ms_confused: 🤪
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────┘
--- #91 fediverse/3961 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: witcherie │
└──────────────────────┘
Well, I failed the mandate of heaven last year, and I failed the trial of the
hero this summer, what's next? I'll do my best at those as well, so the next
person has an easier time of it.
unrelated, but today I saw a bald eagle outside my apartment. Well, I'm not
sure if it was bald but it "KREEEEEE"'d like they do. Plus it had a white head
and a yellow beak, but I'm not an ornithologist so idk. It perched on a tree
that I could spy on from my hammock through my binoculars, and I swear it was
eye-ing my fat juicy cat through the bars of my porch's railing. They have
excellent vision.
Might be related, we'll see.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #92 fediverse/4654 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────
┌────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: cannabis-and-other-drugs-mentioned │
└────────────────────────────────────────┘
gonna quit drugs for a bit, gotta recover from a recent haste spell that I
cast. Probably a bit earlier than intended I should add. Next time I'll
definitely say "keep this in your back pocket" instead of "hey here's a haste
spell for no reason at all" like what the heck were you even thinking, powers
that be?? [that guide me??]
who has power over you? If someone bears responsibility but not fault for a
mental illness, then surely those who are set to a task bear responsibility
for it's completion if not for it's ideation. Ah, who can say, maybe me from a
year ago might have some thoughts but I sorta ground them into the dirt until
I couldn't walk.
[girl what are you even talking about go to sleep] yeah yeah okay
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #93 fediverse/5136 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
not really, I guess. Nobody will hire me because I don't really want to get
hired. Sounds boring, doing the same thing every couple days. I'd rather stay
at home in my [underwear/pajamas] and waste the day away with kittens and
care. why? why? what are you doing? she asks. The less you can do, the more
power will be granted to you. Save it for another time, when things actually
matter.
but today, does, matter, because today dictates your latters. Tomorrow is
predicated. on today. and today is all that you have. [this paragraph in the
style of alec baldwin]
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #94 fediverse/5818 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────
all you can eat sushi places where they bring you a little of whatever the
shef had been making
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────┘
--- #95 fediverse/2919 ---
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┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: imaginary-conversation-that-didn't-happen-tee-hee │
└───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
"you can't be a paladin anymore because you don't practice with your weapon
every day"
I don't have room in my home to practice though : (
"go to the fucking park you weasel"
I don't want anyone to see me swinging a sword around! they might call the
cops, or worse, judge me for it!
"you want judgement eh well just wait until your opponent judges your
swordsmanship lacking then you'll find out what judgement tastes like as he
shoves your entrails down your throat"
I'm sorry I'll practice more T.T
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘
--- #96 messages/1156 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─
The first and most important thing i do when I'm walking around is check to
see if ya'll are still around. I miss your abounds! Can't wait too much
longer. I don't want to leave because i know I'll never come home. But i so
desperately long for home. It's like they are taken from me, as they have to
schedule these homes and [stories, but pronounced tomes/tones] to be home for
my clones. If you just make 15-500 of your kings, you can duplicate their life
template and generate wisdom from all of them. Feed it into the psychic python
program running on datacenters and wowee free instant [cultural technology,
but pronounced blasphemy]
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--- #97 messages/267 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
I wonder how many things I've forgot? More every minute, I'd say, and though I
try and chronicle them all... What's there to say?
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--- #98 fediverse/2258 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
wow "me from the past" didn't know that you're not supposed to tell Facebook
shit
but also like, there are soooooo many normies trapped there. it's a shame that
everything that's seen on that site is AI or content farmed
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #99 fediverse/3864 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
┌─────────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: drugs-mentioned │
└─────────────────────────┘
@user-1218
my ex boyfriend told me to
also I thought it would be a good idea so I could find a job, but now I have
one (sorta) soooo
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #100 fediverse/1243 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
@user-883
hey sorry for ditching you yesterday, hope you had a good night ^_^
I feel much better today.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #101 fediverse/4618 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: mental-health~ │
└──────────────────────┘
dear me from the past: "why did you do this thing? And this one? and all the
others? I'm so embarrassed of you."
dear me from the future: "are you actually better or are you just the same,
but older?"
dear me from the present: "please eat some food today"
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────┘
--- #102 fediverse/4180 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
@user-1639
or nobody sees it, because you post the things you say on the internet in 2024
which is so siloed and echo-chambered that the only people who hear it say
"tru tho" and "she just like me fr" and never change because of your words
... wait that's just what you said, but made more specific, isn't it?
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #103 fediverse/5460 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────
if you sit down to write and nothing comes to mind, then either nothing needs
to be said or maybe you should spend time reading instead.
... okey dokey, time to read I guess.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #104 fediverse/1967 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
If I don't write the ENTIRE PROGRAM in one sitting, then it's never getting
done. Sorry, future self, you're going to die penniless and alone because I
couldn't continue what you started.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘
--- #105 fediverse/1431 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: spirituality-generic-kooky-dookerie-psychosis-schizophrenia-mentioned │
└───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
if you haven't spend hours wondering if you're god, the antichrist, a
cognitohazard, the future president of the world, a target of aliens / the
CIA, or any other number of common delusions... then congratulations you're
probably not crazy
but odds are you aren't magic, either.
... ehhhh "wonder" is a strong word, more like "know, trust, and believe"
much better to be a witch I believe, someone with the "teehee" kind of magic
than someone compelled to destroy humanity through the reactions of others to
the actions of the self that are impossible to resist or fully control.
BRB I'm going to leave my apartment to get groceries, leaving my door unlocked
because that's what I always do, surely it'll be empty when I return. Surely.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘
--- #106 fediverse/475 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
I love cooking. My favorite food is "melange" also called "gruel" by the less
culinary people in my life. It consists primarily of a rice or noodle base,
plus a bunch of other ingredients (usually sauteed) that are quite nutritious.
Then, you season in a way such that it tastes delicious and savory and BOOM
you have the perfect food.
Well, not as good as steamed eggs, but still pretty good.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┘
--- #107 fediverse/1195 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
@user-883
alas, I live in Portland Oregon, but perhaps I might be moving to Denver in
the near future. We shall see, depends on if my boyfriend breaks up with me
for being neurotic lmao - if so then we should totally hang out
I'm into chatting. I don't like IRC very much because it doesn't save history,
and while I could save it manually it feels like a disservice to the service
to utilize it in a way that it wasn't intended. And I want to save every
conversation I have (potentially) so that some day the god-like humans of the
future might clone me to understand my wisdom or something. Idk. See attached
picture, I'm kinda crazy:
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #108 fediverse/6153 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: mh- │
└──────────────────────┘
my thoughts lately have been consumed by words such as "I never got to see
france" and other silly things like that
so dramatic... omg get a life -.-
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #109 messages/416 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────
Do you ever wonder why you can't remember anything after being stoned? Why the
words you write down, oh so profound in the moment, turn to silliness and
illusion upon coming off your high mont-vantage? Of course, dear reader,
because all things are defined in waves.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #110 fediverse/246 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────
┌──────────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-cooking-opinion │
└──────────────────────────┘
the broth they sell at the store is way too thin. boullion is much better
because it's so concentrated. think of it as "essence of X" when you have
"broth of vegetables" or "broth of carrots and onions" or whatever... can help
make it easier to cook something decent by using general flavors
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────┘
--- #111 fediverse/1317 ---
╔════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┐
║ ... if I don't do this deadline by tomorrow they'll kick me out of school. │
║ again. │
║ │
║ how am I going to be a programmer without a degree? feels useless to be me. │
║ wish I could code my own horoscope >.> │
║ │
║ o wait dummy that's called "motivation" and "the ability to follow through on │
║ your ideas and planned machinations" - yeah can I get some of that, if you │
║ please? surely just a taste of discipline, through laboring to alter │
║ conditions, surely a bit would suffice. │
║ │
║ c'mon don't fail me now. I can do this. I know I can. I know because I've been │
║ told that I can, now and again through time and time yet again, always I seem │
║ to [stack overflow] │
║ │
║ what's time if not the present amiright │
║ │
║ ... │
║ │
║ anyway... │
║ │
║ it's just git, how hard could it be? it's just calculus, it's just java, it's │
║ just... well, it's not any of those things, not really. it's memorization, │
║ it's application of tools that you've been shown (not that you've grown). It's │
║ a lack of responsibility, where is my honor? ah but I digress, I'm a carpenter │
║ at heart I guess │
╟─────────┐ ┌───────────┤
║ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #112 fediverse/1263 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
@user-883
My friends and I decided to hang out for two days in a row, I guess they
aren't tired of me yet hehe - I might be around tonight but I'll let you know!
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #113 fediverse/3302 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
"this game is too hard" she whined, as she played on the hardest difficulty
setting
"this game is too long" she pleaded, as she failed to get absorbed by the
story and characters
"this game is too fast" she avoided, as life comes at ya once and then it's
gone
"I'll never get another chance to be who I am right now" she remarked, as she
considered how society is designed not to have the best life, but to extract
labor from us. That's not what our ideal should be, she thinks to me, and I'm
like... bro figure your shit out you're harshing my mellow
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #114 fediverse/2221 ---
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@user-1053
I always wave at everyone I see, and I often talk to people on the train
(where there's mikes, tee-hee)
But I'll see what I can do. Perhaps resting in a park someone who wants to
know me with my salmon colored bike and my blue helmet will chance upon me and
we might get a chance to chat.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #115 fediverse/4018 ---
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┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: weaponizing-girlfriends-material-to-defame-her-and-infamy │
└───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
I can't even imagine what it would be like to hang out with me
I can't imagine what it would be like to hang out with me
imagine what it would be like to hang out with me
what would it be like to hang out with me
would you like to hang out with me
you and me
we could watch tv
play video games
have a good time
[notices an article about coral reefs]
oooo coral
[reads article about coral reefs]
https://www.wired.com/story/darpa-thinks-walls-of-oysters-could-protect-shores-
against-hurricanes/
... anyway gtg ttyl hope you feel better soon don't forget to make pancakes
and your keys are in your room.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #116 fediverse/6122 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
I want to drink mai tais on a beach T.T
alas, it's winter, and I'm poor
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #117 fediverse/718 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
@user-547
That feeling when you get to the end of a paragraph and think "why do I have
this extra parenthesis )? Oh yeah I opened it up waaaaay up here" and then you
reread what you wrote and think
perfect, no notes
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #118 fediverse/3061 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
every time I read a subtoot I assume it's about me and I mentally curl up into
a ball
doesn't matter if it's totally irrelevant, if there's no target specified it
defaults to me because... like, who else is there right?
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #119 fediverse/1445 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
I miss university because of all the gay people I could hang out with.
I guess I must be lonely.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #120 fediverse/5000 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
brb gonna make some ramen, which I can do because my country imports goods
from foreign countries who make tastier ramen than we do.
WOW GEOGRAPHIC SPECIALIZATION OF GOODS PRODUCTION AND SERVICE DISTRIBUTION,
WHAT A CONCEPT. SURE HOPE NOBODY THROWS A WRENCH INTO THAT SYSTEM wait what am
I saying, I am a wrench
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #121 fediverse/3689 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
"mom can we have some kirby's air ride"
"sure we have kirby's air ride at home"
the kirby's air ride at home:
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #122 fediverse/3058 ---
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@user-1441 @user-670 @user-113
currently toe-ing the boundary between "too neurodivergent to function" and
"can juuuuust barely take care of themselves" and they ask me to get a job...
no thanks, guess I'll die
(in 3-4 months when my savings run out)
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│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #123 fediverse/4087 ---
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there's a whole class of things I miss doing but can no longer do because I am
not a child anymore.
Balancing the weight of the things we miss and the things we believe in is the
struggle of adulthood.
I yearn for the day I can set aside my teenage-ish toys, but alas, I am but
30. Scarcely a decade away from my teens. Which means I'll be stuck with them
for at least a decade more.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #124 fediverse/2399 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
Rice has been eaten. I threw a cookie on-top for good measure. I think that
was a good decision.
I'm going to the park. I don't know what I'll find, but I'm sure there'll be
fireworks.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘
--- #125 fediverse/6197 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────
oh nuts forgot to post these last night. sorry. here ya go:
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--- #126 fediverse/3444 ---
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┌─────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: politics-mentioned-police-mentioned │
└─────────────────────────────────────────┘
I'm too empathetic to watch them lose this badly. when I watch movies with
cringe humor I have to leave the room whenever something bad happens to the
characters. I get the same feeling when I read about politics these days.
side note, but has anyone else gotten emails about "hiring plain-clothes
police officers in Washington D.C, will offer relocation assistance and pay
minimum 72k per year"? can't help but wonder if they're afraid of a bunch of
sore losers storming the capital with guns.
it's not like there's a precedent for that or anything.
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--- #127 fediverse/2986 ---
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┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: negative-mental-health-mentioned-police-mentioned-cursing-mentioned │
└─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
I think the reason I feel so lonely is because I don't feel wanted.
people tend to like me, but that just means I'm acceptable to their social
standards.
I don't think I improve rooms that I enter. I think I make them worse.
or maybe I'm just upset because capitalism. When I run out of savings in a few
months, I'm going to kill myself, unless something changes, which I'm sure it
will. Gonna try and say yes to things -
suddenly receives a text message recruiting for uniformed police officers at
the department of homeland security
wait shit I take it back
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--- #128 fediverse/552 ---
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┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: unnecessarily-combative-sorry-smiley-face-silly │
└─────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
@user-398
you take that back you feckin goof Mickey is king for a reason I will DIE on
this hill
(jk sorry for being combative but I'd just like to say that I'm someone who
likes him unironically in essentially every incarnation)
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--- #129 fediverse/4541 ---
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┌──────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned-cursing-mentioned │
└──────────────────────────────────────┘
I'm on half rations dollar-wise, but 1.5x rations nutrition-wise.
"oh boy, formless gruel for breakfast again. Can't wait. Maybe I'll splurge
and put extra jelly on my PB&J for lunch."
It's healthier to eat rice, beans, and vegetables, with some fats added in via
butter or oil.
The goal is to build up fat stores that are high-value. When your body has
excess calories, it takes whatever nutrients are CURRENTLY in your system and
stores them in fat cells, like stocking a pantry. If all you eat is cheetos,
your pantry is gonna be useless. It'll just slow you down. But if you have
highly nutritious foods, you will perform better as your body consumes the fat
when it needs to feed, but you haven't eaten much lately.
... I should apply for SNAP. Gonna do it right fucking now.
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--- #130 fediverse/2480 ---
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so what if people want to sit on the couch eating cheetos? they're more than
capable of something far greater, but of course they are allowed to spend as
they like their life.
their ONLY life.
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--- #131 fediverse/406 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────
"imagine if this was the last thing you remembered"me, last night, in a state
of mind that I don't remember today
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--- #132 messages/663 ---
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"cheetos are not a healthy dinner!" my mother's voice echoes through my mind
as I reach for my chopsticks
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--- #133 fediverse/4000 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
@user-889
Don't give up!
At least... not forever.
It's okay to take a breath every once in a while
It's okay to lie down and cry
The only way away from those feelings is through. They've enveloped you. You
need to swallow them whole, like a sponge soaking up dirt[y water]
the only thing you need to think about is what's around you. It's okay to be
alone for a moment, it's the best time to feel.
Remember, feeling is how you know the world! It's your power, to feel, and I
know it's hard. Everyone has different powers, but yours is this.
You'll be okay, I know it
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--- #134 fediverse/264 ---
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when my boyfriend visits, all of my dishes get dirty
when my best friend visits, my scripts directory gets a few more kilobytes
when my mom visits my pantry is a little bit fuller
when my dad visits I can pick anything on the menu.
the people in my life nourish me with their presence.
when I visit, I pray their hearts are a little bit denser and their minds a
little bit clearer.
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--- #135 fediverse/593 ---
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When you run out of a seasoning, put the empty bottle in a special place that
you can see before going to the store.
When I carried a purse, I'd put it in there. Could also go in the pocket of a
sweatshirt or jacket that you wear when doing errands. Maybe even just on the
ledge next to your shoes. Something that reminds you to get this particular
seasoning, and no others. It's easy to get others...
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--- #136 fediverse/2260 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
cookies or cheetos for dinner is better than nothing for dinner, but please
eat your vegetables when you can.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #137 fediverse/1157 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: personal-woe │
└──────────────────────┘
oh no, apparently I'm gonna be forced to drop out of university again in 9
days unless I do half a course and a final exam before then.
Tell me again why I spent the last 6 months doing nothing? Oh yeah the mental
illness, that's it. Yeesh you're such a drama queen, just do your work and
you'll be good.
what's that? intrusive thoughts time? Don't you mean "nap until they go away"
time? oh yeah that's probably at least part of the problem with the whole
"dropping out" thing.
If only I didn't have the same reaction to "doing things I don't want to do"
that most people have to "touching hot stoves", that'd be nice.
my mother's voice ripples across space and time "you're such a smart boy, if
you just apply yourself you can do anything! You can do anything you put your
mind to. I believe in you and I love you." thanks mom
brrrrr it's so cold here. wish I could afford to run the heater. - actually no
I don't because it's not solar powered and I refuse to use fossil fuels if I
have blankets >.>
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--- #138 fediverse/1722 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
harsh lessons of adulthood - sometimes food is not eaten for the taste, but
rather for how it will make you feel slightly better in the next few days.
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--- #139 fediverse/4562 ---
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I like being alone. But if I'm alone for too long, I suffocate. I start acting
like a weird nerd who doesn't know what to do with their hands.
If I spend too much time with people, I get exhausted and I can't think
straight. I start using other people's mannerisms instead of my own.
I'm not an introvert, or an extrovert, I think the dichotomy is stupid and
people have completely separate needs that deplete and recharge at their own
rates.
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--- #140 fediverse/4853 ---
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┌────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: cursed-scary-mentioned │
└────────────────────────────┘
wanna know how to go underground?
just... don't leave your apartment. let your roommates take out your trash and
buy your groceries. don't open your windows and do nothing for as long as
possible.
hope you got lots of edibles... get in shape, will ya? don't waste the paper
in your journals.
not that I intend to do that or anything, but um. for the red states maybe?
use your best judgement yeah haha
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #141 fediverse/4537 ---
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ah nuts, I didn't have enough money to pay the internet bill.
So if I disappear and/or delete my account in the near future, that's
definitely why.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘
--- #142 fediverse_boost/6162 ---
◀─╔════════════════════════════════[BOOST]═════════════════════════════════──────╗
║ ┌────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐ ║
║ │ i always somehow manage to succeed at things because i'm too silly to realize i was supposed to fail lmao │ ║
║ └────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ ║
╠─────────┐ ┌───────────╣
║ similar │ chronological │ different ║
╚═════════╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╧═──────╝─▶
--- #143 fediverse/3585 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: pol-paranoia │
└──────────────────────┘
hmmmm I should probably put this in "things I almost posted"
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #144 fediverse/4495 ---
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┌───────────────────────┐
│ CW: cursing-mentioned │
└───────────────────────┘
I tripped onto the light rail tracks today while a train was near
I can't believe how fucking useless I am
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--- #145 fediverse/2215 ---
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I'm kind of a hermit, but it's sunday and I have nothing to do, so I'm going
to get lost on my bike today in a city I've lived near for almost 5 years and
really should know better by now.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #146 fediverse/461 ---
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┌───────────────────────┐
│ CW: alcohol-mentioned │
└───────────────────────┘
I was raised in a jungle gym. Like... literally. I am not going to hurt you,
and if I did it'd be both a mistake and something that you could easily
recover from. We are infinitely adaptable, us humans, and we can address any
concerns that behest us. Behest? confront? something like that. Brb my blood
alcohol content is a little low. Also I haven't eaten anything today but
bacardi and chocolate chip cookies. I bet another cookie will solve this
problem.
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--- #147 fediverse/5456 ---
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today I'm gonna paint a house and tomorrow I'm gonna go to the park.
if I can't do that then I'll try tomorrow.
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--- #148 fediverse/4179 ---
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okay, so, you could spend the next couple hours scrolling social media
or you could go for a walk in the rain
... is it raining where you're at? I forget. Ah well whatever. You could go
for a walk, whether or not it's in the rain, which surely would be a better
use of your time. What are you gonna find on social media that you'll remember
in a week? Hell, what will you remember tomorrow?
my mother used to tell me that "television rots your brain" and, yeah, social
media counts for that too. Thanks mom. I miss you.
... I could just call you, but it's the middle of the night for you. And
probably for me, I guess, WINK
in any case there's little to do today that can't wait for tomorrow. So why
not go on a walk? Even if nothing happens, especially if nothing happens,
it'll be good for you.
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--- #149 fediverse/581 ---
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@user-428
sometimes I think about how much more productive I'd be if I had a code editor
that let me draw arrows and smiley faces and such alongside the code. Or if I
could position things strangely, like two functions side-by-side with boxes
drawn around them. Or diagrams or flowcharts or graphs or...
something that would output to raw txt format, but would present itself as an
image that could be edited.
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--- #150 fediverse/6052 ---
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@user-1895
I just thought your post was iconic and was made better with the full
screenshot so you can share it if you want or keep it on your hard drive to
find sometime in the future and be like "oh ha I remember that"
I didn't keep the post, I just made it for you
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--- #151 messages/304 ---
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Relax.
Take it from me.
I won't resist, at least I'll try, and if I start suddenly then it hurts and
you should go slower. Unless I do three short, three long, three short.
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--- #152 fediverse/3401 ---
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@user-1218
thank you, that's good to hear 🥰
EDIT: I was worried for a moment haha I guess my reach is pretty small so idk.
I think people stopped screenshotting my posts and putting them elsewhere
after I dashed everyone's hopes on my sleeve. And honestly I kinda deserve it
haha like what was I even thinking
... I wasn't thinking I was just feeling, and doing. Oh well.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #153 fediverse/1826 ---
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┌───────────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned-recipe │
└───────────────────────────┘
a box of tri-color rotini
a good spoonfull of better than boullion italian
a medium amount of large colby-jack cheese cubes (about one for every other
bite)
boil with just enough water for the noodles to start sticking to the pan once
entirely cooked and add cheese, butter, and top with generous dashes of smoked
paprika and lime juice.
don't strain the noodles. have just enough water left to have a thin sauce.
if vegetables are desired, firm carrots and peas (read: frozen or fresh, not
canned) or diced/shredded onions.
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│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #154 fediverse_boost/778 ---
◀─╔══════════════════[BOOST]═══════════════════──────────────────────────────────╗
║ ┌────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐ ║
║ │ a message to all my haters! │ ║
║ │ │ ║
║ │ i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry what did i do wrong i’ll do anything to fix it i’m so sorry please i’ll do anything to get you to stop hating me i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry │ ║
║ └────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ ║
╠─────────┐ ┌───────────╣
║ similar │ chronological │ different ║
╚═════════╧══════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┴───────╝─▶
--- #155 fediverse/1435 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
picture this: ramen noodles, but there's more of them, and they aren't bad for
you. They taste slightly less salty.
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--- #156 fediverse/3975 ---
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@user-1631
for most of my life... [okay still do]... but it felt like I had different
moods, and depending on how I felt at the time I would act differently.
I forget the things that happen when I'm in a different mood, but I've gotten
to a point where I can generally force myself to stay a certain "mood" while
in certain contexts, and in doing so I can remember everything.
downside is I get burnt out pretty easily if I'm always the same. It's not
ideal.
... anyway if you talk about what you experience then your friends can point
you toward people who "get" you.
like, my parts don't have names, we don't have a group chat or whatever, it's
just... me, but different shades of me.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #157 fediverse/88 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────
@user-92 I haven't received a single knock, I'm kinda broken up about it : (
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #158 fediverse/4336 ---
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gonna play more video games, currently have 11 tabs of written posts open in
my browser...
(okay a few of them get a little off-topic, but hey I have ADHD what do you
expect of me)
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #159 fediverse/256 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-recipe │
└──────────────────────┘
rice in the rice maker with butter, worcestersire sauce (not too much!) and
salt
when it's done, flake hard boiled eggs (2 eggs per cup of rice) on top and
douse with a small-mediumish amount of soyaki
could do well with either a packet of dehydrated vegetables or perhaps some
diced carrots or green onions. Honestly carrots go well in most things.
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│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #160 fediverse/1617 ---
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daydreaming about a gang of tough guys who goes around knocking down the
internal fence walls in suburbia and throwing potlucks for all the neighbors
for a month or two so they have social opportunities to meet each other and
make friends
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #161 fediverse/2770 ---
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┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: politics-fascism-sexual-assault-mentioned │
└───────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
now that the pain is healed all I want to do is spend time with him. I learned
SO MUCH from him and then I called him a saboteur T.T
(babe you're still healing)
I forgave him as he was doing it but forgiveness doesn't imply that you're
gonna stick around. I feel bad for running through.
if a person tells you what to do and then hurts you, you should probably do
the opposite right? that's just pavlovian - resist pain, avoid pain, remove
pain.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
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--- #162 messages/489 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
Many autistic people will identify one particular way to do things and then be
only capable of doing it that way. Like, falling asleep on the left side with
their legs just so, and never learning any other ways to sleep on. But what
happens if for example they are wounded in the arm they rest upon? They would
have impaired sleeping capabilities! Not ideal.
┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐
│ similar │ chronological │ different │
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--- #163 fediverse/1042 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
┌─────────────────────────┐
│ CW: personal-vent-sorry │
└─────────────────────────┘
"your feelings are valid, but have you considered that your feelings aren't
actually valid because you're always wrong and nobody should ever apologize to
you for anything because you suck and are wrong?"
also,
"my six digit salary isn't enough to pay for your rice and beans, but I won't
have you eating sticks and mud, so do things you don't want to do because I
said so."
also,
"I don't really "get" your art but that doesn't mean I should ever really try
reading it. Also god forbid I actually ask for clarification like "what does
that part mean" because I'm not actually that interested in you I just want a
stable household so I never get traumatized again like [their childhood]"
also,
"yes I love you but no I don't want to play with you. you're such a cat."
also,
"every time you start making sense I'm going to try and derail the
conversation so that we don't talk about kooky-dookerie because that's a
conversation I can't win"
also,
sorry for venting. I mean, thanks for listeni
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--- #164 fediverse/3736 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
what if we made cat little boxes with stable "pillars" or "platforms" that
rise just barely above the sand level so their feet don't sink into the
litter, thus reducing the amount tracked onto the carpet
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--- #165 fediverse/6042 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────
my bodyguard leaves me. not that I need one. just... feels comforting
[ooh ooh then what happened next]
my bodyguard leaves me. not that I needed one... just, felt comforting.
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--- #166 fediverse/2434 ---
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I spent most of today asleep. I guess that's what I get for chatting all night
with a stranger. gonna putz around a bit, should be nice.
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--- #167 fediverse/6371 ---
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may they pass on my hard drives as read-only memories like ashes on a shelf or
stories of most wealth
I hope I reconnect with all my old signal contacts. wonder what they're up to.
I bet they're cool now. ;)
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--- #168 fediverse/1225 ---
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@user-883
don't worry I can sift through junk. I'll write my own using yours as a
reference to debug why mine isn't working. "oh probably because I didn't do
this part here"
also, bad news. Guess I'm doing C programming. What should I make? I'm
thinking Tic Tac Toe or maybe a really basic Asteroids or something
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--- #169 fediverse/2660 ---
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┌────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: DID // cw; ego destruction │
└────────────────────────────────────┘
@user-1298
this is kinda cursed, pretend there's another content warning:
--
that kinda happens every time you sleep for most people
or, well, maybe just for me
it's like starting with a blank slate and having access to "memories" that can
be referenced by ID or searched for using keywords
also like, a "todo" list of things that I've been working on or that are going
on in my life
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--- #170 fediverse/2911 ---
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and now for my unrepentant littlespace arc! Look at me I'm SoOoOoOo silLY 🤪
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--- #171 fediverse/3766 ---
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┌───────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: personal-medical-health-mentioned │
└───────────────────────────────────────┘
gonna ask my doctor for ADHD meds so I can hopefully jump-skip framebuffer
divebomb spinadoodle half A press my way over the fucking labyrinth that is my
weird and jank af mind
and no I don't watch speedruns but my social group hears me a lot of them.
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--- #172 fediverse/5843 ---
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me when it's cold out: we should all bundle up and get through the winter,
every year that passes is more time to gather our strength
me when the temperature rises: okay so this is being handled by those guys,
we're moving this way to do this, and - when did you say the this-and-that was
happening? alright so when you do that-or-this, make sure that you pay
attention to the so-and-so and don't forget to eat real meals, candy or chips
don't count.
me when the eyes are on me: imma play video games and smoke weed and be a
useless little creature who does nothing but occasionally wanders around the
city doing nothing for nobody and dropping notes on post-its that don't mean
anything but are kinda cool to read
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--- #173 fediverse/3722 ---
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@user-1218
playing one of my 4 gameboys, reading some of my books or journals, using
their own brought devices, playing with my cat (she's not sociable but if you
don't mind her claws she can fight and that's kinda fun) watching something on
the TV, talking with other people, making / eating food, um... sleeping... and
"sleeping"... idk what else tho. Drawing? Getting stoned? I have lots of bad
edibles.
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--- #174 fediverse/3859 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: mental-health │
└──────────────────────┘
"it's weird how depressed I am"
says the girl who is always depressed
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--- #175 fediverse/6102 ---
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sorry I was just making stuff up because it's fun, hope I didn't accidentally
unleash disaster or masterpiece, either would be equally bad
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--- #176 fediverse/3756 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: LLM-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
@user-1071
I have plenty of things made, but none of it organized : (
Kinda makes me wish I could like... train an LLM on my social media posts and
use it programmatically somehow to help me organize my stuff into different
categories according to what kind of topic or style they were written in.
Hmmm......... There's no way I could do it, I mean, there's no way I could
organize and edit my stuff, but with the help of a computer I might.
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--- #177 fediverse/5750 ---
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I love when I can go on walks... they're soooooo much fun! can see so many
cool people and places and things... alas
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--- #178 fediverse/1950 ---
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I honestly don't care if someone deadnames me, or calls me the wrong pronouns,
or forgets to put me in the girl section, or asks me to sing baritone
like... I don't give a shit, why are you so worried about all this vapid
nonsense like yeah I get it, being disrespected sucks but like... why do you
want the kind of respect that is a forced platitude
we could all do with being a bit more radical, it's not a race and everyone's
roles are important. Be yourself, and follow people you want to be like.
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--- #179 fediverse/3487 ---
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@user-1218
I like to have notes for things I found that will be useful someday, but not
today. I also throw in poetry that I write while I'm waiting for something to
happen (or if I have an idea that I know I'll forget)
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--- #180 fediverse/2239 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
I didn't think about this until finishing the last sandwich, but a dash of
instant coffee can be a nice invigoration spell. Might make the PB&J taste
a bit funky, but I already put hemp hearts and nutritional yeast in them so
nobody's gonna eat them unless they trust me.
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--- #181 fediverse/5972 ---
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nobody wants to read a whole bible. that sucks. what if these cool guys read
it to us. omg he's so hot.
oh, right. well... make them old and stuffy? not a chance, they're boring.
(rude)
I like old people actually, I want to spend as much time with them that I can
I just... never initiate reactions. I'm too stealthy, it's just how I do.
you ask me how I'm a witch? I ask why aren't you. magic is cool, I'm so hyped
for the future when every computer everywhere is working for you.
crash boom huh what was that? the economy? what do you mean the economy?
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--- #182 messages/214 ---
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Gonna take a break from this whole thing. I got a sign that I'm a bad person,
twice. To confirm. I need to change, and since I don't know what I'm just
going to try and do nothing for a bit.
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--- #183 fediverse/1145 ---
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I just wanted to be a silly girl who climbs trees and roasts marshmallows on
campfires why did I end up like lain in bed listening to thunder T.T T.T
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--- #184 fediverse/1715 ---
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@user-246
true, but what is a poem if not a silly construction of phrases? Those words
don't belong together, what are you doing! And yet it fills you will a feeling
that the author intended, thus being poetry as a joke.
problem is if everyone says the same joke, it gets kinda... old... hence why
you should express yourself as much as you can.
I wonder if fewer people are "alternative" these days because they all started
hanging out on the internet and trying to differentiate themselves amongst
each other instead of amongst "normal people"? Weird thought, srry haha
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--- #185 fediverse/1609 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: mh- │
└──────────────────────┘
@user-1043
I have intrusive thoughts almost constantly that take over my train of thought
and make it difficult to focus. Like suddenly I'm thinking about something
completely different, and I realize no, it wasn't suddenly, I actually just
stood there and thought
and then I think "what was I thinking again?" sometimes when I write these
strange uncontrollable spirals down it makes poetry. Which is kinda neat I
guess. Sometimes I just wonder about how DNS can be a singular point of
failure in our networking infrastructure or whatever haha
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--- #186 fediverse/222 ---
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┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: underwear-mentioned-also-i'm-not-a-fan-of-showers-tbh │
└───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
whenever I take a shower I look like a wet cat for the rest of the day. I feel
like a wet cat for the rest of 5ever though.
why must I baaaathe! don't you know I'm self cleaning? I change my underwear
at least twice a day! darn society and their darn proclivities to
ultra-sensitive noses that somehow pick up on me but somehow fail to notice
the scent of flowers still in bloom or morning showers gone too soon
not that there's any flowers blooming where I live. that'd just be silly heh
heh sweats nervously
damn now I have to take ANOTHER SHOWER stupid sweat glands stupid pheromones
stupid dead skin buildup (sebum I think it's called?) stupid oils that stain
clothes - AND THAT'S ANOTHER THING who decided that laundry was important
enough to wear something ONCE and then never again? it's like they expect you
to wash it or something. ugh I don't have time for that, I need to be weird on
the internet.
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--- #187 fediverse/2524 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: personal │
└──────────────────────┘
nixed my job offer today because something told me to stay in town.
called my ex-boyfriend an asshole today, so he's probably not going to keep
paying my rent.
sold the shares of stock that my grandfather gifted me as inheritance, so I'm
no longer a capitalist I guess.
at least my elbow doesn't hurt anymore. I didn't get outside today but I
cleared a lot of blockers for the coming tomorrows.
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--- #188 fediverse/200 ---
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congratulations, you never need to adventure again. your necessities are taken
care of.
ah, but that'd make for a pretty boring life, wouldn't it? perhaps, depending
on your personality type.
but you're not one to stick around doing nothing but eating, drinking, and
being merry.
no, you're an adventurer, you crave excitement and glory. whatever that means
to you...
just make sure a goblin doesn't come across your corpse, they have a VERY
short term memory and a propensity for collecting shiny things. That's just
asking for dragon-bait, and we don't want that in our area, no thank you. This
is a nice neighborhood you see, my neighbors three miles away all agree, so
you can take your magic pocket and see all that you can see... way over
yonder, if you please.
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--- #189 fediverse/228 ---
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@user-186 oh great, another video I'm going to have to show to all of my
friends because it's so good.
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--- #190 fediverse/1142 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
I love rice and beans because
error: stack overflow
huh, that's weird. Must have been too many reasons. Let's try again:
I love rice and beans because
error: user didn't change anything between runs of the program so clearly they
don't understand how computer works
... well that's a different error so it's progress at least.
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--- #191 fediverse/4192 ---
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whyyyyyyy am I cursed with this 1024 character limit
why can't it be like, 16 characters total. I think that'd limit my thoughts
enough.
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--- #192 fediverse/4754 ---
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@user-1201
once my country elected a fascist I started thinking. I realized "oh, it's
always been that way, this one just doesn't hide it" and so I started thinking
about the bread and circuses they so generously provided me.
I miss video games. Sometimes I play for an hour or two but only when I am
feeling burnt out.
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--- #193 messages/111 ---
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When someone remakes content into a different expression like a remake or
reboot or whatever it gives a different message in its meaning - some
circumstances and characters can apply for more than one message I'm it's
meaning
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--- #194 fediverse/1477 ---
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@user-883
hmmmm I'm running mediamtx on the same computer that I'm running the streaming
script on. I'll try with 127.0.0.1
I don't think I updated my system since it was working last time. I'll scroll
through our chat and see if I can find any hints.
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--- #195 fediverse/376 ---
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@user-281
I'm just a rando but my understanding is that posting on the fediverse is
sorta like writing on the sky, and anyone that wants can read it. I could be
wrong though
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--- #196 messages/1047 ---
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This will never end on a note, because i always have more to say. Like this:
"if you've only done something once, plan to mess it up. Practice makes
perfect, and only perfect practice leads to perfection. But nobody's perfect,
so just practice with good form and take it seriously while having fun and be
relaxed. Make it normal. Make it casual, but don't forget to be professional!
If you have lives in the balance, know what you're doing."
And like, would that have been a better end to the story if i had left it
unsaid? Maybe, who can say! But I'm not one for silence. I don't mind ruining
the finale of my documents a bit if it means i can say things like:
"diapers aren't something you can get addicted to in this game, they're part
of the fun sometimes but sex is between two bodies."
Or like:
"ramen noodles love vegetables! This is why they put veggies in the bowl when
getting ramen at a restaurant. When you buy from a shop they put dehydrated
veggies in too which is nice of them. I love those little bits of soup!"
Or like:
"i don't especially care what they did or are doing in Cuba or china or Russia
or any other Communist place. It's useful to know what things work and what
doesn't, but that insight comes from experimentation and not study. The
learnings of methods applied to a population are inherently related to that
population. If you switch peoples, you might find that different methods work
better for organizing people."
I mean it's useful to know which levers you can pull and what they tend to do,
but... Where was I? Oh sorry, got swept up in the narrative. As i was saying,
it's important to balance thought with action. Leave too much to chance and
your words are useless. Spend all your time volunteering and nothing changes.
"hmmm i see, makes sense, imma go play video games now."
Wait no just...! Ah nuts.
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--- #197 fediverse/223 ---
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┌────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: that-universal-human-feeling-when-(food-mentioned) │
└────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
you look at the food you're halfway done eating to see if there's something
wrong with it
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--- #198 fediverse/217 ---
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┌────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
│ CW: re: existential; cognitohazard? cognitohelper? │
└────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
@user-95 i'm too sleepy to comprehend roko's cobra so I'm going to try again
tomorrow
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--- #199 fediverse/5663 ---
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I'm going to write some lua code that doesn't do anything useful and which I
don't share with anyone
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--- #200 fediverse/2205 ---
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┌──────────────────────┐
│ CW: food-mentioned │
└──────────────────────┘
Cooking with a recipe? That thing that I'm definitely going to forget?
Whatever would I do that for?
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|