=== ANCHOR POEM ===
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 Um I should mention that the waterproof leather hat I mentioned earlier is
 styled like a cowboy hat not like a French penis. (what a weird way to say
 dildo)
 
 Trust me it'll look great if you do it right if not ill show you how to do it
 right
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=== SIMILARITY RANKED ===

--- #1 messages/1460 ---
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 "hello, if you make my hat in leather and red, I'll wear it around town in the
 rain and tell people where it came from"
 
 "no no it's okay if my sides get a bit rained on, I'll learn how to use it to
 stay warm."
 
 "hi, can you make it 2 inches here and a bit thicker here?" 
 
 "sure I'll show you how I wear it. Here's some things that I wear alongside
 it."
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--- #2 fediverse/4634 ---
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 @user-1719 
 
 did you see any erections on the nude beach? you must be in the southern
 hemisphere, I'd freeze my tits off here.
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--- #3 fediverse/4687 ---
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 "girl, who let you dress yourself? You literally put your rain jacket on over
 your backpack"
 
 yeah, uh, if your rain jacket isn't big enough to wear over a backpack then
 you are wearing a plastic sweater, not a rain jacket
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--- #4 fediverse/4688 ---
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I don't even lock my front door anymore
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--- #5 fediverse/4939 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: personal-medical-health-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────┘


 me - "I have to wear diapers and it sucks because I hate them"
 
 my girlfriend - "okay but what if you didn't"
 
 me - ":O"
 
 she/her - "how did you make that sound with your mouth"
 
 the it - a-wawaWAwa
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--- #6 fediverse/2869 ---
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 "nobody told me you can wear skirts above your boobs!"
 
 they used to have straps, too.
 
 [above boobs, below armpits]
 
 also like a skirt for your shoulders, but only a really flowy one would work.
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--- #7 messages/553 ---
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 what if we voted for the relative quantities of goods imported to our shores
 
 like... "500 anonymous people voted for this specific purple dragon dildo, and
 that's enough to put forth a petition to import them from australia"
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--- #8 fediverse/2480 ---
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 so what if people want to sit on the couch eating cheetos? they're more than
 capable of something far greater, but of course they are allowed to spend as
 they like their life.
 
 their ONLY life.
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--- #9 fediverse/3892 ---
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 "they should make clothing stores for tall people"
 
 uhhhh have you ever heard of "big-and-tall"
 
 "yeah but I'm not big, just tall"
 
 smh
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--- #10 fediverse/6237 ---
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 witch hat with styrofoam and fabric and a leather strap harness like a fur suit
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--- #11 fediverse/169 ---
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 @user-95 one of the most empathetic people I ever met on VR chat was consoling
 me with their mic off while I was oversharing about some stupid things people
 did to me in the past. things that stupid me thought were okay and actively
 encouraged because I was stupid. anyway when their mic was off their body
 language spoke for them. I'll try that next time.
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--- #12 fediverse/1334 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: TMI-medical-issue-thing-don't-worry-about-it │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 subconsciously running your hand over your butt every time you stand up to
 make sure you didn't pee your pants
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--- #13 fediverse/5961 ---
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 @user-138 
 
 maybe it's evil hackers - idk that's beyond my expertise - good luck : )
 
 (I'd need to see the piece of technology to work on it. I'm a hardware kinda
 [girl, but pronounced guy])
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--- #14 fediverse/3241 ---
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 ┌────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: lewdness-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────┘


 for the same reason you shouldn't compliment a cute girl based on something
 she can't control ("nice tits gorgeous can I suck on ur nipples later") but
 should instead compliment them on something they chose ("cool tattoos I also
 like Celeste")
 
 you also shouldn't accuse hot people of colonizing just because they like to
 play Magic the Gathering or whatever.
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--- #15 fediverse/5246 ---
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 lol I spent half an hour holding a trowel and then I designed a new type of
 digging instrument
 
 and they want me to work a job /eyeroll
 /stickey-outey-tonguey-face/pics/all/total/* -ffvagrnbeexey --no-menus 14
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--- #16 notes/to-fight-ice ---
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 if you want to fight ice, patrol your neighborhoods where all the mexicans
 live.
 bring a gun if you're willing to die for liberty.
 
 Don't wear all black. Wear your favorite outfit, to be remembered.
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--- #17 fediverse/495 ---
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 @user-358 @user-356 
 
 Neat! I'm assuming you can screw in a little antenna? That's awful cute. Like
 a robot getting eyebrows.
 
 Why do you need two of them, though? Actually screw it that's a dumb question,
 robots can obviously express themselves more clearly if both their eyes are
 professed.
 
 Wait... Why do robots need more than one eye? Because it'd be weird otherwise,
 duh.
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--- #18 fediverse/2231 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: detransitioning-plans-uspol-scary │
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 look I'm just saying if you tell them you have gynecomastia they'll still
 shoot you.
 
 better to not get to that point.
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--- #19 fediverse/2044 ---
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 honestly I think everyone should have two mastodon accounts - one for people
 you like, and one for people you trust
 
 (I have one)
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--- #20 fediverse/4697 ---
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 I want to pee in your pants and throw javelins at visions of bad guys while
 climbing on boulders and gazing to the horizon
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