=== ANCHOR POEM ===
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 I'm the kind of witch who's so poor, she can barely afford to eat because
 she's paying all her money on rent
 
 "just get on food stamps, you'll never pay for food again"
 
 sorry, can't do that. I'd feel rich with a full pantry. What is best in life?
 A full pantry, the smell of warmth, and the space to resist peril.
 
 I know I'm not rich enough to afford those things, because I don't work hard
 enough. HA just take the handout, solve your material problems, live in your
 house for 6 more months instead of 2, and stop complaining you stupid ritz
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=== SIMILARITY RANKED ===

--- #1 fediverse/4730 ---
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 I am not interested in being given money. Usually it means someone wants
 something from me, like labor or some of my stuff. I have all the stuff I
 need, why would I need more money? I like my stuff! I'll help out when people
 need help but I do that because I'm a good person, not because I want you to
 fucking pay me for it.
 
 I have all the things I need... except a deed to my house. apartment. oh yeah,
 they can kick you out for that sin. well, sorry, I couldn't find out at
 goodwill or in the trash bin, so I guess I'm deed-less. My deeds go unproven.
 How can I prove that I deserve a decent life in this particular roof, the one
 I find over my head, when I cannot prove that my deeds qualify me for a decent
 life lived under this particular roof?
 
 I mean, did you ask the neighbors if they want me gone? Am I really that
 smelly? Does my keyboard make "clickety-clack" noises all through the night?
 Does my cat meow and bother the children? Do my friendly smiles and waves make
 you uncomfortable?
 
 Have a decent life.
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--- #2 fediverse/4544 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursing-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────┘


 I can't cancel my internet because I use it to work, which almost pays enough
 to cover rent, and nothing else.
 
 It's hard to avoid spiraling when you run out of money. Every time this
 happens to me I start feeling things
 
 like... am I good for society? Society doesn't want me, clearly, because I
 don't have any money. And currency is how you measure demand, right? It's
 literally a measure of value.
 
 But then I think of all the homeless and poor people and, like... I value
 them, so what if they don't have dollars? It's literally just paper. Or bits
 in a mainframe that nobody knows how to program anymore.
 
 So if they're valuable at least to me, yet me, with my 67$ in the bank and
 127$ internet fee, is not valuable to me... Then what's the discrepancy?
 
 I'm not trying to be hard on myself, it's not my fault that I bleed money, but
 I still feel terrible.
 
 It's like a common cultural persuasion, if you run outta cash you better kill
 yourself fast.
 
 Fuck that. Oops cursing mentioned, one s
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--- #3 fediverse/4528 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: uspol        │
 └──────────────────────┘


 @user-1695 
 
 never accept your own death
 
 fight for every second of life, something something do not go quietly into
 that grim dark
 
 what the fuck are you supposed to do? Reading what you said got me pretty
 fucking pissed - keep talking for a start, it helps, people need to be pissed.
 
 I'm also broke as shit, don't know how I'm going to pay rent and eat, but
 it'll get done.
 
 Where do you live? Can other people help you? Medications are an
 organizational problem, not an insurmountable barrier. We'll make it work.
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--- #4 messages/298 ---
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 When you say "we need more low income housing" they hear "I want to live near
 more poor people" and they think "why would I want to live near poor people?
 They're poor for a reason! We only need enough around to work the jobs that
 suck anyway." which is basically their way of justifying slavery/indentured
 servitude, as it's not like they'd ever offer a way to climb out of that
 low-income pit. And its not like they'd ever let you pay them more, so they
 can afford to be equals, because then they wouldn't be middle-class anymore.
 They'd just be mid.
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--- #5 fediverse/4470 ---
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 to be "rich" is to have more than another.
 
 if you are happy, they are happiness poor.
 if you have community, they are alone.
 if you have serenity, they are chaotic.
 
 I am rich in very little but fire in my soul.
 
 I have enough in most cases, but I still struggle to pay rent.
 
 I am warmed by the pearl my swirling darkness has coalesced into. It nourishes
 me and keeps me aligned.
 
 Never forget your purpose and your truth. It will not abandon you, so long as
 you do so too.
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--- #6 fediverse/2089 ---
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 "ah nuts, the crows are back. Better give them some diced-up carrots so they     │
 shut up."                                                                        │
 BAD, this teaches them to "sing" for attention which is annoying af              │
 "Hmmm, this carrot looks kinda withered. I'm going to dice it up to throw to     │
 the birds because it's better than rotting in a dump"                            │
 BETTER, because you're being sustainable and nourishing local wildlife,          │
 "That songbird is beautiful! And that squirrel is building a nest. I'm going     │
 to throw some of this pre-diced carrot that I keep in an air-tight container     │
 on my porch to them so they feel rewarded for doing things that I want"          │
 EVEN BETTER, but requires more effort and forethought                            │
 [noooo didn't you read ranger rick as a kid you're not supposed to feed the      │
 wildlife because it'll teach them to trust humans in a world where humans can    │
 be total assholes to them and also we don't want them hanging out in cities      │
 because they might get run over or whatever]                                     │
 listen, they're gonna live where they can find food. And if they can't find it   │
 in the woods, they'll liv                                                        │
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--- #7 fediverse/4541 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: food-mentioned-cursing-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────────┘


 I'm on half rations dollar-wise, but 1.5x rations nutrition-wise.
 
 "oh boy, formless gruel for breakfast again. Can't wait. Maybe I'll splurge
 and put extra jelly on my PB&J for lunch."
 
 It's healthier to eat rice, beans, and vegetables, with some fats added in via
 butter or oil.
 
 The goal is to build up fat stores that are high-value. When your body has
 excess calories, it takes whatever nutrients are CURRENTLY in your system and
 stores them in fat cells, like stocking a pantry. If all you eat is cheetos,
 your pantry is gonna be useless. It'll just slow you down. But if you have
 highly nutritious foods, you will perform better as your body consumes the fat
 when it needs to feed, but you haven't eaten much lately.
 
 ... I should apply for SNAP. Gonna do it right fucking now.
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--- #8 fediverse/4738 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐                      │
 │ CW: revolutionary-politics-mentioned-swearing-mentioned │                      │
 └─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘                      │
 you said you wanted a revolution, and, well, I could not be more proud of you.   │
 It's actually getting done and if I stop and think about it I'm kind of          │
 amazed. Never thought I'd see this kind of change so quickly.                    │
 "what change? I see nothing substantially different"                             │
 oh yeah well do you go outside often                                             │
 do you hang out in the park                                                      │
 I know it's fuckin' january and it's cold as heck (ah nuts swearing mentioned    │
 one sec) but homeless people have to LIVE in that weather so like... wear        │
 layers, spend time outside, detox from dopamine, write poetry and tear it out    │
 and leave it on a park bench, be loud, claim the space, it's yours, that's       │
 what it's there for.                                                             │
 I see it in your eyes. I see it in the random notes I find on the sidewalk.      │
 Everyone says "make friends, find community" and I say "commune with a           │
 stranger" but I'm also a witch and that's a pretty witchy thing to do.           │
 ... Really fuckin' wish we still had payphones (ah nuts swearing mentioned -     │
 oh already CWd)                                                                  │
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--- #9 fediverse/1844 ---
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 I got a job offer for a job outside of my state. But I don't want to leave my    │
 home. I feel safe here. I know people. I know the places around me.              │
 The one perk is that goods and services are easier to acquire, but I don't       │
 need much. I'm fine where I'm at. But where I'm at has rent.                     │
 What a plague is it, that we must suffer for life!                               │
 there's no entry-level jobs for working with our sight.                          │
 only when youre too tired to complain will they let you direct others, or        │
 share creative ideas for fixing the problems you're paid to assuage.             │
 Alas, that my life had meaning. That my words were better off spoken. Maybe      │
 then Id live as I define, designing a world of my own hearth.                    │
 but if a king lives in decent frugality, are they really so bad for our flock?   │
 and if a wizard spins tales that are weird to consider, but not much else...     │
 are they better off starved in the dark?                                         │
 no-one likes me. computers are paper-weights given light. sure would be nice     │
 if none but the fools went wanting.                                              │
 I mean yeah I'd live in a treehouse                                              │
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--- #10 fediverse/2562 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: rich-apologia    │
 └──────────────────────┘


 among all the others, I want a wonderful and fulfilling life for the
 socialite. they deserve light just as you and I might.
 
 "eat the rich" bruh there's like, 100 people who are running the show.
 everyone else is basically just a syncophant who's trying to get ahead and
 stay working.
 
 then there's like their families and such and like... they didn't do anything
 wrong, they just eat cheese and wine and laugh at memes all day with their
 besties.
 
 they are basically pets
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--- #11 fediverse/1042 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: personal-vent-sorry │
 └─────────────────────────┘


 "your feelings are valid, but have you considered that your feelings aren't
 actually valid because you're always wrong and nobody should ever apologize to
 you for anything because you suck and are wrong?"
 
 also,
 
 "my six digit salary isn't enough to pay for your rice and beans, but I won't
 have you eating sticks and mud, so do things you don't want to do because I
 said so."
 
 also,
 
 "I don't really "get" your art but that doesn't mean I should ever really try
 reading it. Also god forbid I actually ask for clarification like "what does
 that part mean" because I'm not actually that interested in you I just want a
 stable household so I never get traumatized again like [their childhood]"
 
 also,
 
 "yes I love you but no I don't want to play with you. you're such a cat."
 
 also,
 
 "every time you start making sense I'm going to try and derail the
 conversation so that we don't talk about kooky-dookerie because that's a
 conversation I can't win"
 
 also,
 
 sorry for venting. I mean, thanks for listeni
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--- #12 fediverse/1157 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: personal-woe     │
 └──────────────────────┘


 oh no, apparently I'm gonna be forced to drop out of university again in 9
 days unless I do half a course and a final exam before then.
 
 Tell me again why I spent the last 6 months doing nothing? Oh yeah the mental
 illness, that's it. Yeesh you're such a drama queen, just do your work and
 you'll be good.
 
 what's that? intrusive thoughts time? Don't you mean "nap until they go away"
 time? oh yeah that's probably at least part of the problem with the whole
 "dropping out" thing.
 
 If only I didn't have the same reaction to "doing things I don't want to do"
 that most people have to "touching hot stoves", that'd be nice.
 
 my mother's voice ripples across space and time "you're such a smart boy, if
 you just apply yourself you can do anything! You can do anything you put your
 mind to. I believe in you and I love you." thanks mom
 
 brrrrr it's so cold here. wish I could afford to run the heater. - actually no
 I don't because it's not solar powered and I refuse to use fossil fuels if I
 have blankets >.>
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--- #13 fediverse/935 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
 @user-171 
 
 I guess so. She's a little useless without me, I mean if I left her alone
 she'd probably just flop around and complain until I came back. But she's good
 for the instincts I find.
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--- #14 fediverse/138 ---
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 @user-129 if you throw your plate across the room instead of eating well then
 it was probably an accident. if you keep doing it and are being a huge brat
 about it then maybe you should go in time-out until you are ready to sit at
 the table and eat like an adult. plates are expensive yo, and people are
 starving (for housing) in Africa or whatever.
 
 in related news, I heard that ~40% of homes in America are empty. I don't know
 if that's still true, I read it in like, 2014. I wonder if it's higher or
 lower now?
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--- #15 fediverse/169 ---
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 @user-95 one of the most empathetic people I ever met on VR chat was consoling
 me with their mic off while I was oversharing about some stupid things people
 did to me in the past. things that stupid me thought were okay and actively
 encouraged because I was stupid. anyway when their mic was off their body
 language spoke for them. I'll try that next time.
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--- #16 fediverse/1535 ---
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 I only take things that aren't mine if they're in the trash. Or near the
 trash. Or in a store.
 
 so weird how the store won't let me leave until I give them some of my
 dollars. This quartermaster drives a hard bargain!
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--- #17 fediverse/1797 ---
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 I'd like a job where I can make computer programs, write poetry, play video      │
 games, make food for friends, grow plants and care for animals, walk or ride     │
 my bike for at least an hour every day, and get stoned on the weekends.          │
 Is that too much to ask? I have plenty of other skills besides, like carpentry   │
 and strategic thinking and wilderness survival and situational awareness and     │
 active listening and unmitigated empathy and a curious and critical mind.        │
 Am I not good enough for thee? I have many flaws, I lack stamina and memory,     │
 and while I am sharp and can think quickly and adeptly, the sharpest knives      │
 are the first to dull, and the most focused minds are those most easy to         │
 mislead. I trust too easily - if I meet you on the street, I'd offer my soul     │
 to you if you said you needed it. I put the needs of others over myself, often   │
 to my own detriment, causing others to need to assist me in turn - am I not      │
 wretched enough to be?                                                           │
 Working for 8 hours a day 5 days per week is not part of my design               │
 requirements. Alas                                                               │
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--- #18 fediverse/2286 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: uspol-food-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────┘


 ... dangit, these sandwiches are getting kinda gross. Guess I'm gonna have to
 eat them myself, which, uh... idk what I expected xD
 
 sometimes you just have all this energy, right? and you don't know what to do
 with it, so... sandwiches. And hey, sandwiches are cool, they're a pretty neat
 anti-hunger tool! but uhhhh idk if I really want to eat six whole sandwiches
 myself. I'm gonna do it though hehe wish me luck [ding] ah nuts my rice and
 beans are done, hang on lemme eat those first
 
 [passes out from exhaustion]
 
 exhaustion can be cured with a nap
 
 exertion can be cured with water and a few rest days
 
 trauma can be allayed for at least a few days with soul food and compassion.
 maybe laughter too, depending on the mood.
 
 fear can be bolstered with a smile, a wink, and a courageous act,
 
 and loss is just change you didn't consent to.
 
 they won't consent too, so let's give them some change to tolerate.
 
 [internally salivating over all the piles of weaponry that I envision them
 surrendering]
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--- #19 fediverse/6093 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: politics-mentioned-cops-mentioned-cursing-mentioned │
 └─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 it's not always about minorities, though. sometimes they feel strongly about
 hard work and self-sufficiency or individuality or whatever. I'm telling you
 now: those values are shared by other ideologies as well.
 
 it's okay to prefer to be around people who are similar to you. That is a
 personal choice and it should be allowed. I mean, have you ever heard of a
 convent? a bunch of girls hanging out making out all day and - wait, what's
 that? it wasn't that fun? lotta clerical work and reading about god? alright
 well you get the idea, sometimes it's nice to feel comfort in similarity.
 
 it's okay to believe that people should work hard. It's not an imposition upon
 them to demand more of your peers, especially if you are willing to help them.
 Especially if they are willing and able. It's less alright to force them to.
 Even less so to "encourage" them by taking all of their stuff. Though I will
 say, being homeless isn't as bad as it used to be. Still hurts.
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--- #20 fediverse/487 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 I don't really care about capitalism, sorry... why should the butcher be paid
 more than the baker? It's all a bit silly to me.
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--- #21 fediverse/2828 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: scary            │
 └──────────────────────┘


 the animals are afraid.
 
 they can hear it just the same as you do, and they don't understand it
 
 but you do
 
 I bet
 
 if enough birds
 
 saw us working hard to fix things, outside, physically, with our bodies, in a
 way that a bird might understand, then perhaps things will get solved.
 
 --
 
 I don't hear noises when things talk. I hear "eat me" when the rice-cooker is
 done, I hear "WOW" when a car horns and "wash-ing-wash-ing" from my dishwasher.
 
 my cats peaks for "FOOD" because I offer "food for her" but if I thought of it
 as "feeding her" she'd probably hear "FEED"
 
 then other times I hear "moooom. I'm scared. why!?" and I sing her a song
 about how it's going to be alright.
 
 the poor thing is lonelier than me. at least I have you, computer-tube.
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--- #22 fediverse/1965 ---
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 My family is of wealth. Well, not really, just my father. We could probably be   │
 considered top 10-20%, if I had to guess, though he's never really told me how   │
 much he makes. I never asked, as I felt it would be rude.                        │
 But still, I restrict myself. I live in as cheap a home as I can find, while     │
 still affording space for myself. I eat rice and beans, that I cook myself. I    │
 apply myself as hard as I can as often as I can, not just to my own goals but    │
 to the goals of whichever corporation is merciful enough to hire one as          │
 wretched as me.                                                                  │
 I am fine, fine enough, and yet life's vigor runs out.                           │
 When my father dies, god forbid, I have no idea what happens to the rest of my   │
 family. We're all trying our hardest, but we're really fucking neurospicy and    │
 he was just lucky enough to be born in an era where if you're neurodivergent     │
 you can fake it till you make it. And he made it because he's lucky and          │
 because he (legitimately) worked his ass off. "New money" if you will...         │
 Top 20% is like, the salary of a doctor or lawyer                                │
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--- #23 fediverse/2424 ---
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 if I don't take this job, then I'm going to be homeless.
 
 if I do, then I'll be moving to a different city.
 
 a city that I don't know.
 
 my upbringing tells me that this isn't a choice at all, but... 
 
 at least I have a place to keep my stuff. maybe I can find a different job.
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--- #24 fediverse/2386 ---
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 Tee, hee, look at me, I'm a witch who writes nothing but kookie-dookerie
 
 I pee my pants and stare at trees, what's less harmful than little old me?
 
 The best smokescreen I can think of is to be true to your heart, to be weak,
 to be vulnerable. Then you get put on the "worry about later" list, and not
 the other kind.
 
 I never lie. When convinced I am wrong, I change my mind. I am always
 listening, always ready to hear where I'm flawed. I do my best every day, and
 that's enough for me.
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--- #25 fediverse/460 ---
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 I realized I don't give a fuck about capitalism. If you want to deprive me of
 food, shelter, or anything else... Fine. I exist at your behest. Would your
 really deny me from speaking the words that you disagree with?
 
 Oh, you would? Okay. Guess I'll starve. I don't mind, I just hope you'll take
 care of the people I have taken as my responsibility in my absence.
 
 Oh, you won't? You say that you'll destroy what I care about, in the pursuit
 of ever-growing power over others, which you will use to extract value and
 impress your desire of destruction and oppression onto the weak and powerless
 that you control?
 
 Then you are my enemy.
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--- #26 fediverse/3841 ---
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 ┌────────────────────────────────────┐                                           │
 │ CW: socialism-recycling-mentioned1 │                                           │
 └────────────────────────────────────┘                                           │
 "I think I'm going to quit my job at the recycling center. Everyone there is     │
 just a little too catty for me. I think they like the verbal sparring but it     │
 just gets a little tiresome after a while."                                      │
 oh, sorry to hear that. Well if you still want to help out there's plenty of     │
 work to do. I could set you up at another recycling center nearby too, if        │
 you'd like...?                                                                   │
 "well, I like the idea of universal recycling. It was a little annoying when     │
 people would put food waste in with the clothing donations, and this one time    │
 I found like 8 bags of cat litter inside of a washing machine. Spent like an     │
 hour vacuuming everything out, which... actually wasn't bad. Kinda felt a        │
 little cathartic to clean it so thoroughly."                                     │
 "on the other hand I would like to use my mind a bit more, my creative           │
 projects are kinda in a slump so I figure I could use my body at home and my     │
 mind at work. I've been meaning to build a desk out of some spare hardwood I     │
 snagged at work but I haven't gotten around to it."                              │
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--- #27 fediverse/1673 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: navel-gazing about other people's mental health │
 └─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 @user-192 
 
 https://eldritch.cafe/@user-1065/112530780377382613
 
 this comic, except instead of "trans enough" it should say "good enough"
 
 a poor plan executed at the right time, in the right place is better than a
 great plan that sits in your heart as you see someone who needs your love in
 pain.
 
 sometimes the best way to figure out "what the fuck is wrong with me" is to
 satisfy your emotional needs to be good by being helpful, even if you're not
 quite sure what "helpful" means. It's the thought that counts.
 
 Personally I think that if you're feeling bad and people offer you kindness,
 you should take that kindness (in whatever form it be) and use it to bolster
 yourself as you're "really going through it". Even just a touch of affection
 like a like or a ❤️ can be comforting in awful situations.
 
 reject normalcy
 
 embrace queerness
 
 define your own story with your own words
 
 embody your soul in the moments that stand out amongst the backdrop of
 "tuesday afternoons" and "waiting for the bus"
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #28 fediverse/488 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────┐
 [in response]                                                                    │
 you only say that because you're privileged such that you may ignore such        │
 realities. You are despicable, you ignore the plight and reality of those who    │
 you claim to speak toward - what a jerk!                                         │
 (in response)                                                                    │
 how futile it is, the effort to denigrate yourself to infinite requirements.     │
 I'm literally unemployed, I have no capital, I cannot speak for naught but       │
 those who would hear me. I guess that makes my words useless, wouldn't you       │
 agree? Shall I describe myself more fully? It's the responsibility of the        │
 audience to ascertain the intentions, biases, and contextual evidence that the   │
 author presents in their thesises. So... You, who are reading this, what do      │
 you think of me? Would you ever tell me as such, or am I simply a mass of        │
 words in the void of experience that comprise your existence in this wholely     │
 (yet incompletely) digital existence? I hope you have a good life, my most       │
 precious of viewers. I hope you never face incontrovertibly impossible           │
 hardship. I hope the light of your life is to y                                  │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #29 fediverse/3711 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: food-mentioned-politics-capitalism-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 what if instead of spending most of our paycheck on rent we spent most of it
 on food so that our food could be higher quality
 
 "but then people will starve because they can't afford food"
 
 okay how about we make food free and tax it
 
 "but then people will be fed by MY tax dollars and what if I don't want to use
 the services that the tax dollars are paying for"
 
 oh you don't want to eat, do you? or do you just not want THEM to eat? I hope
 leopards eat your face
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #30 fediverse/3691 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: food-mentioned   │
 └──────────────────────┘


 I had a dream that someone fed me a McDonalds burger in the airport (with
 "special sauce") and then the next time I was at the grocery store in the
 waking world I ended up buying a bunch of those meat replacements that I
 usually skip in favor of moar vegetables.
 
 Hmmmmm.... I wonder if I have a deficiency
 
 (yeah you dumbass it's a calorie deficiency, just eat more)
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #31 fediverse/1381 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 ┌────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: death-mentioned-nuts-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────────────────┘


 I'm a bit of a narcissist because I had a lot of... alone time as a kid, and I
 was a bit starved for attention.
 
 but I'm also afraid of rejection so if you have anything to say I'll listen
 for hours and try to be what you need me to be and give what you need me to
 give so that you don't leave me.
 
 Also, nobody has ever hurt me. And so I trust wholely and completely and
 absolutely. I get logically why that's not a good move but frankly I'd rather
 die than be cooperative. ah nuts better add a content warning.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #32 fediverse/5201 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────
 @user-192 
 
 is okay, girl
 
 time will be richer sooner
 
 don't poop your pants just yet
 
 remember, good is just a shade of gray away from silver which you can use to
 line your pockets with tinfoil hats
 
 beep boop computer touchers anonymous called they said they want their secret
 handshake back
 
 if you wanna diss your associates go ahead but I sure as heck love my rad-ical
 com-patriots just as much as I love my ice-cream salad friend witches
 
 ... whoops there I go being insane again, hope you feel better friend 
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #33 fediverse/3302 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 "this game is too hard" she whined, as she played on the hardest difficulty
 setting
 
 "this game is too long" she pleaded, as she failed to get absorbed by the
 story and characters
 
 "this game is too fast" she avoided, as life comes at ya once and then it's
 gone
 
 "I'll never get another chance to be who I am right now" she remarked, as she
 considered how society is designed not to have the best life,  but to extract
 labor from us. That's not what our ideal should be, she thinks to me, and I'm
 like... bro figure your shit out you're harshing my mellow
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #34 fediverse/462 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 I don't care about capitalism. You know what's more interesting than bringing
 value to shareholders?
 
 How I'm going to clean this floor that I drunkenly spilled beer upon with only
 2 paper towels and 0.1ml of bleach.
 
 How I'm going to feed the 36 people who are coming to this social event
 tomorrow that I've only sorta planned for and that I have enough groceries
 for, but am not quite sure how to cook everything in a way that is delicious
 and accessible.
 
 how I'm going to climb this mountain on only 2 eggs and a tiny bowl of
 hashbrowns even though I promised my friend I'd be strong and that we'd reach
 the top because that way we'd be able to
 
 ============= stack overflow =====
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #35 fediverse/2480 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 so what if people want to sit on the couch eating cheetos? they're more than
 capable of something far greater, but of course they are allowed to spend as
 they like their life.
 
 their ONLY life.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #36 fediverse/4554 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: political-violence-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────┘


 can't fucking wait till we're done eating the rich and I can go back to a
 simple life of playing with my cat, making video games, writing poetry (bad
 poetry, but I like it) and hanging out with my friends.
 
 gotta build the social infrastructure to get through this phase first, though.
 something something echo chambers exist IRL too
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #37 fediverse/569 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 Billionaires aren't solving childhood food insecurity.
 
 They have the capacity to, with their essentially endless supply of dollars,
 which taste good on rye with a dash of mustard.
 
 But alas, they choose not to.
 
 They CHOOSE to STARVE children. They choose that, by not dedicating their
 lives to solving that particular problem.
 
 "oh but like, there's so many problems in the world, how can-" shut the fuck
 up, spend the dollars, make it happen, and now there's one fewer billionaire
 and one fewer problem in the world. The next one can fix the next problem,
 that's why we keep them around, isn't it?
 
 https://mkorostoff.github.io/1-pixel-wealth/
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #38 fediverse/5660 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────┐
 ┌─────────────────────────┐                                                      │
 │ CW: violence-alluded-to │                                                      │
 └─────────────────────────┘                                                      │
 my enemy is not "the rich"                                                       │
 money brings power, and power brings evil, but there are many other ways to      │
 gather power that may be just as evil.                                           │
 my enemy is evil. of which there is very little in the world, but much of        │
 which resides in the hands of the powerful, upon whom all our fates depend.      │
 most people with money are either stupid lucky, willful, or intensely focused.   │
 some people with power are rich, and some people with power are evil.            │
 I know it when I see it. Sometimes, you need to force the choice - test their    │
 virtue - and from this you are informed.                                         │
 most things go WAY over my head.                                                 │
 most things are too easy to be true.                                             │
 most things that Id do for you tend to be of the heart. I'm not a frontline      │
 girl, I have weak noodle arms, but I do hope you're in shape.                    │
 resolve, determination, and innovation. That is what I offer. Do you want it?    │
 I'm sure. I won't prove it with blood, not unless I may raise my fists in        │
 defence of another.                                                              │
 I'm not JUST a baby, I'm a banner too.                                           │
 bannermen fall.                                                                  │
bannermen fall last.  negative six characters remaining.
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #39 fediverse/5136 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 not really, I guess. Nobody will hire me because I don't really want to get
 hired. Sounds boring, doing the same thing every couple days. I'd rather stay
 at home in my [underwear/pajamas] and waste the day away with kittens and
 care. why? why? what are you doing? she asks. The less you can do, the more
 power will be granted to you. Save it for another time, when things actually
 matter.
 
 but today, does, matter, because today dictates your latters. Tomorrow is
 predicated. on today. and today is all that you have. [this paragraph in the
 style of alec baldwin]
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #40 fediverse/3618 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: food-mentioned   │
 └──────────────────────┘


 they say fat people are jolly, which makes me wonder if the only reason I'm
 often sad is because I'm too skinny.
 
 I need an italian grandma to feed me butter and pasta T.T
 
 eat somethin' why don'tcha you're skin an' bones, kid
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #41 fediverse/4562 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────
 I like being alone. But if I'm alone for too long, I suffocate. I start acting
 like a weird nerd who doesn't know what to do with their hands.
 
 If I spend too much time with people, I get exhausted and I can't think
 straight. I start using other people's mannerisms instead of my own.
 
 I'm not an introvert, or an extrovert, I think the dichotomy is stupid and
 people have completely separate needs that deplete and recharge at their own
 rates.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #42 fediverse/3107 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: Meta, oversimplifying │
 └───────────────────────────────┘


 @user-1449 @user-1074 
 
 I mean, you're allowed to fight about stupid shit as long as you realize it's
 about something that doesn't matter. As long as people are working together
 toward their common goals then... whatever, right?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #43 fediverse/4610 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────
 maybe it's just my middle-class childhood privilege talking, but now that I'm
 an adult I just can't really be bothered with dealing with capitalism.
 
 like... I get it, you're coercing me into laboring on your behalf because you
 possess the violent power to take away everything that I own. good for you,
 don't care.
 
 seriously, fuck off "we're gonna cut off your power in 5 days oooooo you gotta
 pay rent with money you don't have because nobody will give it to you unless
 you do things for them oooooo" how rude.
 
 why can't people do things for me instead? why does it have to be for you, and
 you alone, capitalism? what's your problem? do you get off on controlling the
 power supply? I mean, I get it, coercive power is a hell of a drug, the riddle
 of steel and flesh and all that, but haven't you ever heard that the dichotomy
 between "civilization and barbarism" is the exact same as the contrast between
 "cooperation and competition"?
 
 work with me here, just find a way to get through the next month or two. trust.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #44 fediverse/2279 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursing-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────┘


 There's a lot that can get done in a work week. That's like, five whole days!
 What kinds of things can you get done at work in a week?
 
 .... Oh really? That's... well, not ideal.
 
 But like... what are you doing then while at work, NOT working? Oh, it's just
 bullshit work you're doing? [nuts, cursing mentioned, one sec]
 
 So, like, if you aren't doing stuff... Maybe that means you're kept from your
 full potential doing things that don't matter to you? Huh that's not a great
 deal.
 
 But, uh... If you had five days to live, what would you do? It's not like you
 can see the world, but hey I've already done that. It's not like you can save
 it either, that's not something you build - rather, it's more like a garden.
 But I guess you can lay the foundation, give cause for the fight, and that's
 decent enough of a start, at least when you've only got five nights.
 
 ... I guess I got some writing to do, haven't I?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #45 fediverse/5045 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: more-curses-mentioned-food-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────┘


 "what about Supplementary Nutritional Assistance Programs?"
 
 yeah those only work if your family is rich enough to be a citizen. I know
 it's hard, but we're poor, honey, and that's just what we have to deal with.
 Here, take my bologna. They have ketchup packets at work.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #46 fediverse/3128 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 ┌─────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: mental-health-disordered-eating │
 └─────────────────────────────────────┘


 I never should have bought these crackers. They trick me into thinking I'm
 eating something nutritious.
 
 But that's the case with any empty calories.
 
 but hey, calories are calories, right?
 
 I guess that's true. Still, I'd rather make something.
 
 oh would you now would you REALLY rather MAKE something
 
 ... I should rather.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #47 fediverse/1431 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: spirituality-generic-kooky-dookerie-psychosis-schizophrenia-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 if you haven't spend hours wondering if you're god, the antichrist, a
 cognitohazard, the future president of the world, a target of aliens / the
 CIA, or any other number of common delusions... then congratulations you're
 probably not crazy
 
 but odds are you aren't magic, either.
 
 ... ehhhh "wonder" is a strong word, more like "know, trust, and believe"
 
 much better to be a witch I believe, someone with the "teehee" kind of magic
 than someone compelled to destroy humanity through the reactions of others to
 the actions of the self that are impossible to resist or fully control.
 
 BRB I'm going to leave my apartment to get groceries, leaving my door unlocked
 because that's what I always do, surely it'll be empty when I return. Surely.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #48 fediverse/5486 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────
 ┌───────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursing-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────┘


 "ew but they're dirty"
 
 oh yeah true
 
 okay new plan how much do you think it'll cost to buy a hotel
 
 [this is why the socialists invented buy-in]
 
 "I don't think socialists did that??"
 
 buy in, hmmmm, what's that? oh yeah it's when you say "hey what if we X'd" and
 they said "yes I agree with you because you present a reasonable estimate on
 reality"
 
 {uh hi I just got a message from "some-nowhere" here ya go: "oh my god she's
 fuckig instane}
 
 [ugh cursing-mentioned, that means there's fewer characters to transmote.]
 
 [no because then I'd run out of steam and it'd be incomplete. Plus sometimes I
 like the distraction of a reasonable limitation.]
 
 (okay, but are YOU worth it?)
 
 leave her alone she's working her charms, this is how witches d-do.
 
 "so, isn't the point to give yourselves the coverage of a location
 transmutation? so, wouldn't you want to find someone alike and share their
 life?"
 
 what is even the point, why even bother, just give them 
                                                           ───────────┐
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--- #49 fediverse/2919 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: imaginary-conversation-that-didn't-happen-tee-hee │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 "you can't be a paladin anymore because you don't practice with your weapon
 every day"
 
 I don't have room in my home to practice though : (
 
 "go to the fucking park you weasel"
 
 I don't want anyone to see me swinging a sword around! they might call the
 cops, or worse, judge me for it!
 
 "you want judgement eh well just wait until your opponent judges your
 swordsmanship lacking then you'll find out what judgement tastes like as he
 shoves your entrails down your throat"
 
 I'm sorry I'll practice more T.T
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #50 fediverse/6122 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
 I want to drink mai tais on a beach T.T
 
 alas, it's winter, and I'm poor
                                                           ─────┐
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--- #51 fediverse/4853 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────
 ┌────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursed-scary-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────────┘


 wanna know how to go underground?
 
 just... don't leave your apartment. let your roommates take out your trash and
 buy your groceries. don't open your windows and do nothing for as long as
 possible.
 
 hope you got lots of edibles... get in shape, will ya? don't waste the paper
 in your journals.
 
 not that I intend to do that or anything, but um. for the red states maybe?
 use your best judgement yeah haha
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #52 fediverse/1651 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────┐
 gee I sure wish my morals reflected the ethics of my society. it really would    │
 be nice is they didn't include so many shitty things like oppressing people      │
 abroad or being super-duper racist for an embarrassing amount of time. But,      │
 like, freedom, liberty, and the justice to hope? true justice is when everyone   │
 gets what they want. true liberty is when we can live as we want with the        │
 magnitude of the result of our lives determined by how hard we worked.           │
 truly, the hardworking slave should be better off than the rich wanderer. But    │
 alas, that's not how it's currently set up. >.>                                  │
 though it is kinda nice to own things too, so maybe the other extreme is a       │
 little extreme. I sure like having my favorite spork.                            │
 back in the old days, in the buildings they've since demolished (to put          │
 skyscrapers there - the "old-timey" buildings in your neighborhood are there     │
 because they're in the least commercially viable position - meaning the lowest   │
 density of people.) you could walk through an entire building in a shared        │
 communal s                                                                       │
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--- #53 fediverse/1075 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: bones-flesh-mentioned-spirituality-dreams │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 we succeed not because of our trials, but in spite of them.
 
 they cannot own us, for we are but bones in the flesh
 
 every day yet denied us is another day until our bright future
 
 "oh, but why are you homeless? [in the near future, maybe, we'll see] That
 fate is reserved for your [unwanted/incapable/undesired/incongruent, I forget
 the actual words]"
 
 well, voice in my head that suffused me with magic and warmth and whisked me
 away in a dream to a bubble-reality where my actions are meant to reflect me,
 surely your appraisal is just? I worked with my partner, I was swallowed
 neither by lust, nor greed, nor hunger, [greed in this case being fulfillment]
 and yet I awoke when I went to my sister rather than a doctor. Dreams are hard
 to unravel, but I think it was more for your benefit than mine, wouldn't you
 say?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #54 messages/1039 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
 I'm worth it.
 
 I don't demand much. Feed me, take change of me, care for what i do, that's
 pretty much all.
                                                           ─────┐
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--- #55 fediverse/2281 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 I'd be a terrible spy. Not only is my opsec something that someone needs to
 teach me, I'm much too busy to implement things without their help. I am
 unabashedly compassionate though, so just ask and I'll pour love from my heart.
 
 But hey! There's always time to practice, each moment you can think "what kind
 of a sign is this?"
 
 Like a crazy person following the will of god, or a nature witch listening to
 the wind in the trees.
 
 What they often get wrong, and what they could be better at hearing, is that
 signals are not signs unless they're out of the ordinary.
 
 Trick is, if you're a spy, then you need to leave signals that are visible
 enough to your quarry, but not to the stars.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #56 fediverse/3238 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: personal-health  │
 └──────────────────────┘


 I'm not an ABDL, but I can appreciate the aesthetic sometimes because I share
 a particular kinship with them due to a medical condition I have and have had.
 Plus throw in a bit of Body Integrity Identity Dysmorphia and you get my
 messed up relationship to my own physical struggles.
 
 ah, well, what can you do except be open and honest about who you are and what
 you believe? If only it wasn't so damn hard.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #57 messages/685 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────
 If someone calls you in the middle of the night asking to be let in because
 they need a place to sleep, don't let them in! Unless you know them obvi but
 someone you don't know trying to manipulate you like "please I need some
 shelter" like, babe no, we need to know each other first, it's dark, I'm in my
 pajamas, c'mon.
 
 If it's below freezing then okay, maybe, but... They got themselves into that
 situation
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #58 fediverse/3925 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
 most people, when they run out of toothpaste:
 
 "oh huh I should buy more"
 
 me, when I run out of toothpaste:
 
 "verily in three monthes time, when I shall next possess toothpaste, I shall
 forsoothe brush TWICE as hard and TWICE as often, to make up for the holes
 inflicted upon my teeth. Innest addittioneth, no more candy shallest be
 eateneth untileth ye toothpasteth be acquiredeth"
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #59 messages/1062 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────
 I believe that all people's should be middle class, and if you're lower class
 it's because you squandered your wealth, not that you didn't have it to begin
 with.
 
 I believe people of higher class should get there because they are skilled,
 respected, or otherwise beloved. I believe they should hold less power the
 more they own, because wealth is its own burden and reward.
 
 I believe people who have power should respect it. They aren't necessarily
 those who have little, or much, but rather those who deserve it. It is
 difficult to estimate systematically who deserves wealth or power, but
 difficult problems are the most interesting if kept fair.
                                                           ────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────┘

--- #60 fediverse/1935 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 @user-28 
 
 because "deserving money" to a reasonable person sounds like "deserving access
 to the goods and services that a pittance might afford"
 
 but to them "deserving money" means "did they earn those luxuries with their
 own luck and effort like me, a person who works very hard and definitely has
 earned everything I have"
 
 basically, a "blood sweat and tears" tax before you can have nice things like
 roofs and clothes and nourishment
 
 thing is... life is hard for people who need dollars. Their judgement reflects
 a lack of understanding of what people who lack resources go through.
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--- #61 fediverse/2518 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 it's good to be ethical,
 it's good to be kind,
 
 but there will always be assholes,
 and sometimes you're not having a good time
 
 it's okay
 it's fine
 
 assholes deserve life
 times deserve others to be kind
 
 life is not always interesting
 and that's often by design
 
 the moments of clarity,
 the moments of heart,
 
 these are what define you
 and display your own spark.
 
 trust in yourself.
 be kind to one another.
 
 you are braver than you know,
 and always a bit wiser.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #62 fediverse/3645 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 me, sitting down at my computer in order to be distracted:
 
 "I should make and eat a sandwich"
 
 me, sitting down at my computer with a PB&J and peanut-butter fingers:
 
 "I should be productive"
 
 me, sitting at my "work desk":
 
 "I'm hungry. And I'm bored. And I can't stop thinking about this video game I
 haven't played in a year."
 
 repeat
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #63 fediverse/4349 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┐
 ┌──────────────────────┐                                                         │
 │ CW: re: uspol        │                                                         │
 └──────────────────────┘                                                         │
 @user-883                                                                        │
 best case scenario, we elect a lawyer working for capitalism, the kind of        │
 society we live under.                                                           │
 having money is the same as having resources. And resources allow you to apply   │
 yourself to a goal. The more you have, the better, but they each bear a heavy    │
 load.                                                                            │
 Do you sacrifice your labor? your dignity, your honor? what do you burn on the   │
 fire of wasteful expenditures, just for the power to rent?                       │
 I'm saying that if you don't have money, you need to think about what you can    │
 do with what you got, because that's how you pay for things, at least until we   │
 decide that we'd rather help each other than work on capital's games.            │
 you have a house though, right? a place to live until it gets hot? that's good   │
 enough for right now. Stay where you're at, do what you can to help. Get in      │
 the habit of it. Think about how someone will complete their task, and then      │
 think about stuff two or three steps down the road - what tools will they        │
 need? what are they working on next? Can make any of those availble?             │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #64 fediverse/3465 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: food-mentioned   │
 └──────────────────────┘


 I'm not really a "cookies and tea with honeysuckle and purslaine" kind of witch
 
 I'm more like a... "here eat this gruel and drink lots of water, it'll give
 you energy for the long road to come" kind of witch
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #65 fediverse/4398 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┐
 good morning.                                                                    │
 I have some more things to say, and then I will start working on those maps.     │
 Then, time permitting, I'll ride around my city and sit on park benches and      │
 eat from food trucks and write in my notebook. At least until it gets dark -     │
 I'm a skinny white girl, and I'm not THAT stupid.                                │
 ... Okay maybe I'm a little stupid, because that's how I got caught last time.   │
 This time I'll be more careful, for your sake.                                   │
 No unexpected bike maneuvers leading to a crash. The spirit of revolution that   │
 stirs inside me deserves better than scrapes and bruises.                        │
 No following strangers for 12+ hours because I wanted to keep an eye on          │
 unknown agents. That's not my responsibility any longer.                         │
 Everything I do, I do it for you. For a better world. For the kids I never       │
 will get to have. For everything I believe in, and all the things I hope you     │
 believe in too.                                                                  │
 A better world is possible. A better world is within reach.                      │
 For now, have some things I wrote this morning. Then, later, some preliminary    │
 discussable maps. DFTBA.                                                         │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #66 fediverse/4787 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────
 don't take on more than you can handle. if your plate is full, don't check out
 the notes by the roadside. Doing so tells all the nearby drivers "hey I need a
 job, anyone got anything for me?" which they'll then drop off further along
 the route to your house.
 
 if you just walk on by then nobody will notice as you head home.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #67 fediverse/5149 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 I'm picturing a building with stone outer walls and glass inner/ceiling.
 
 there are drapes along each of the glass's edges, that hide things from the
 cavalcade [continue this later it's a cool picture]
 
 -- stack overflow --
 
 zines about how to chop wood or how to build a shelter are infinitely more
 useful than agitatory pieces. but fire is what we need, so perhaps agitation
 indeed.
 
 -- stack overflow --
 
 does the queen watch each of her pawns fall in her stead? or are they
 faceless,/`beyond her own head?
 
 it never came easy to me, this feeling of mysteries. yet somehow I'm now more
 alive than dead. power is penance, after all.
 
 "hey man hows it going?"
 
 "I'm doing fine, how are you?"
 
 "well, I ran out of gas, and I need to find a way to get more."
 
 "I see. If I were in your situation, I'd ask people around for some petty
 cash. people still carry coins these days don't they?"
 
 "I uh, what? no, not really. so you can just ask people for things?"
 
 "yep, it's really quite simple. would you like me to follo
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #68 fediverse/3444 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-mentioned-police-mentioned │
 └─────────────────────────────────────────┘


 I'm too empathetic to watch them lose this badly. when I watch movies with
 cringe humor I have to leave the room whenever something bad happens to the
 characters. I get the same feeling when I read about politics these days.
 
 side note, but has anyone else gotten emails about "hiring plain-clothes
 police officers in Washington D.C, will offer relocation assistance and pay
 minimum 72k per year"? can't help but wonder if they're afraid of a bunch of
 sore losers storming the capital with guns.
 
 it's not like there's a precedent for that or anything.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #69 fediverse/2524 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: personal         │
 └──────────────────────┘


 nixed my job offer today because something told me to stay in town.
 
 called my ex-boyfriend an asshole today, so he's probably not going to keep
 paying my rent.
 
 sold the shares of stock that my grandfather gifted me as inheritance, so I'm
 no longer a capitalist I guess.
 
 at least my elbow doesn't hurt anymore. I didn't get outside today but I
 cleared a lot of blockers for the coming tomorrows.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #70 notes/my-personal-linux-experience ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 for all those reading at home, I need to apply to a job and apparently they
 only really care about my experience with linux. Which is kinda like asking
 "hey can you tell me what are you favorite foods to eat with a spoon?"
 when someone is applying to be a chef. Um, okay, applesauce I guess? I usually
 eat mac and cheese with a knife and another knife, but sometimes I dip into the
 spoon for that extra shoveling experience points.
 
 anyway here's my linux projects:
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #71 fediverse/1471 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: scary-mentioned-cursing-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────┘


 brb leaving my apartment empty and unlocked (well, empty aside from a
 scaredy-cat) for the next "rest of the day" so if anyone wants to surprise me
 with a note saying "you're fucking stupid, lock your damn door" I'll read it
 tonight and reply "ha like a lock is gonna do anything besides give me an
 extra second or two of warning"
 
 ... it's so that your neighbors can hear if someone's breaking in with a
 crowbar, you stupid bitch
 
 ... too bad 80% of the floor of my apartment building is inexplicably empty.
 Just my floor, none of the other floors or buildings. Weird.
 
 ... anyone wanna start a commune in an apartment building? No no stupid idea.
 Unless...?
 
 ... anyway ttyl
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #72 fediverse/1996 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 I don't expect or demand anything from teenagers except perhaps "be a cool
 kid" and "learn all that you can"
 
 Even most adults when they mess up I just think "ah, well, they're trying
 their hardest, same as anyone"
 
 And tbh I'd rather see a kid running up and down the aisles than burying
 themselves in an ipad
 
 I think we, as a culture, built our society to demand too many "should"s from
 people.
 
 "I should get a job" "I should study this thing I'm not interested in so I can
 make more money" "I should put out traps for the rabid wolverines so they
 don't start hanging out in my underwear" "I should pick up detergent at the
 grocery store"
 
 Should is useless. Do; or do not. There is no should.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #73 fediverse_boost/5655 ---
◀─[BOOST]
  
  I'm crying over the fact, that me, or folks around me aren't capable of organizing jailbreaks.   
                                                                              
  And we aren't even trying 😢                                                 
                                                                              
  I clearly have been taken major wrong steps in my life that I ended where I am now.   
                                                                              
  I am sorry.                                                                 
                                                                              
  Yes sure we say abolish prisons, but without attack it will never materialize.  
  
                                                            
 similar                        chronological                        different 
─▶

--- #74 fediverse/4672 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics!        │
 └──────────────────────┘


 I miss video games
 
 cries from self-inflicted sacrifices
 
 but you're worth it
 
 imma overthrow fascism, dismantle oppression and power, and liberate those in
 chains, just so I can play games again
 
 yeah I mean, uh, whatever gets you outta bed
 
 "at least you have a bed. why are you complaining?"
 
 maybe it's the only thing I'm good at. I wonder if anyone would hire me to be
 an analyst or something? Maybe a designer?
 
 bro you're asking for a job on the eve of the revolution, what's your deal
 
 okay so this might be news to ya'll but I'm technically a human even though I
 wear a witch hat and sometimes speak in rhyme. And humans tend to think about
 things in the context of their current environment. Currently, if I want to
 pay rent or whatever, I need a job. So...
 
 sounds like a lame excuse for not giving up your possessions and throwing
 yourself to fate's design
 
 I already did that and fate told me to go home and take a bath?? idk what you
 want from me, and no I'm not doing any drugs to find out.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #75 fediverse/661 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: alcohol          │
 └──────────────────────┘


 it's usually good to have some beer on hand. Just in case someone else should
 need it.
 
 Same with a lot of things, like common medicines and dietary requirements.
 Frankly each of us should have a well-stocked pantry, tended to by a
 quartermaster who knew what held worth. But hey that's just team dynamics,
 what can I say that's with more mirth?
 
 [okay fine I'll be sillier, I promise]
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #76 messages/519 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 I am currently in the stages of applying to work at a multinational
 corporation primarily located outside of America. It is a respectable
 institution that commands great respect.
 
 However, I am borderline incapable. If I am chosen to work there, I *will*
 fail and I *will* embarrass America on the world stage. I am not one of our
 best, nor am I one of our brightest and boldest. I have *unique* perspectives,
 and those are *valuable*, but the society and the systems I find myself in has
 proven incapable of utilizing me to my utmost potential.
 
 I must work. I cannot work. But I must. I am disabled. But I must be able.
 Capitalism compels it.
 
 Would that our system could be something consensual. I am worth more as a
 writer than a laborer. Yet laborers are the only ones being hired.
 
 I am not an engineer. I enjoy engineering.
 
 I am not a laborer. I enjoy labor.
 
 I am a writer, and perhaps little else besides.
 
 When I die, nothing remains of me but my bones. My words are not desired. My
 life is not impactful. I am not special.
 
 Well... Not special since I have given up cannabis. If I started smoking weed,
 if I felt secure and enough to do so, perhaps I might utilize my instability
 for great (GREAT) artistic ends.
 
 But art is labor. And labor is difficult.
 
 Where am I to go from here? I cannot pay rent. I am isolated and alone. I am
 deprived of affection. I crave it. I am lost in my own heart, begging the
 world to give me a start, but the start has passed long ago. There is nothing
 to do but what I've been meant to do, what I've been hiding from myself and
 the world. I have been wasting my talent on tweets. How mundane.
 
 ... I can do better than profane.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #77 fediverse/3340 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 @user-1501 @user-1502 @user-1201 
 
 if so, then don't think about it too hard, you might need disability too!
 
 speaking as someone who needs disability aid but can't get it because of
 restrictions like this (also can we talk about the multi-year process to
 secure such rights, like c'mon rent's due every MONTH) I have to say that
 you're right, it's bullshit, UBI for all, disability benefits for those who
 need more, and employment for people who believe a cause is worthy enough to
 apply themselves towards it.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #78 fediverse/4537 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 ah nuts, I didn't have enough money to pay the internet bill.
 
 So if I disappear and/or delete my account in the near future, that's
 definitely why.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #79 fediverse/4536 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-mentioned-cursing-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────┘


 the USA is fed by undocumented immigrants who have no other options. I won't
 go into which kind of slavery it is, but you can figure it out yourself.
 
 If those workers are deported (or worse), the USA suddenly becomes
 significantly closer to famine.
 
 We need them. We need to pay them fairly, obviously, but in a purely selfish
 way we need them in order to eat
 
 and he fucking knows that.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #80 fediverse/1317 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┐
 ... if I don't do this deadline by tomorrow they'll kick me out of school.       │
 again.                                                                           │
 how am I going to be a programmer without a degree? feels useless to be me.      │
 wish I could code my own horoscope >.>                                           │
 o wait dummy that's called "motivation" and "the ability to follow through on    │
 your ideas and planned machinations" - yeah can I get some of that, if you       │
 please? surely just a taste of discipline, through laboring to alter             │
 conditions, surely a bit would suffice.                                          │
 c'mon don't fail me now. I can do this. I know I can. I know because I've been   │
 told that I can, now and again through time and time yet again, always I seem    │
 to [stack overflow]                                                              │
 what's time if not the present amiright                                          │
 ...                                                                              │
 anyway...                                                                        │
 it's just git, how hard could it be? it's just calculus, it's just java, it's    │
 just... well, it's not any of those things, not really. it's memorization,       │
 it's application of tools that you've been shown (not that you've grown). It's   │
 a lack of responsibility, where is my honor? ah but I digress, I'm a carpenter   │
 at heart I guess                                                                 │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #81 fediverse/90 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────
 @user-95 did you get the instructions? Mine came in a dream, which sucks
 because I only remember two or three of the rules. I think there were nine
 total, and now I'm afraid to practice my non-programming spelling because I
 don't want to violate causality or redefine temporality or something like
 that. I guess now is as good an hour as any... Dear other witches, hear my
 prayer, I'm kinda lonely and I only know a few spells, but I think that's good
 enough for now.
 
 Do you know any spells, prospective witch?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #82 fediverse/5650 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────
 I exist now at the height of my gluttony.
 
 I need more to be demanded of me.
 
 I am not afraid to ask for help.
 
 I solve other people's problems before my own.
 
 I have very little insight into my habits and patterns.
 
 My memory isn't great, but I recall details that matter.
                                                           ──────────┐
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--- #83 fediverse/4788 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────
 if there's a phone number on something, find someone else who wants it instead
 of calling it. doh. extra degrees of separation.
 
 if you think you know someone who wants something, take it when offered.
 opportunists try and find the most valuable thing, but the truth is they're
 all just as valuable and just as worthless in the right context. something
 that's valuable to you is worthless to me, and something worthless to you is
 valuable to me.
 
 everything's worth less once you sit on it for a while... don't be dumb, keep
 track of what's still going on, but also keep your head down. unlike me, who's
 a face, looking forward so you don't have to.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #84 fediverse/4099 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursing-mentioned-jobs-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────────┘


 I don't think anyone should work at a job they hate, no matter what.
 
 They will perform worse. They will harm themselves. They will shackle their
 dreams to a false promise of persistence begot rewards. They will spiral into
 depression, despair, depravity, and addiction.
 
 If you hate your job, fucking QUIT. If you hate every job, fucking RIOT. If
 nobody will hire you, SELL DRUGS.
 
 [I'm not actually advocating breaking the law, please don't arrest me]
 
 or like, move to the country and become a farm-hand for a retiring salmon
 farmer who can't quite reach into the trees to pick the salmon fruit or dump
 the bucket of vegetable scraps into the black soldier fly larva pit anymore.
 That's always rewarding.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #85 fediverse/4024 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
 my cat doesn't know that my family is my family. She thinks they're just some
 other people who visit the house.
 
 but they're special to me, as all people are, and I think she takes notice.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #86 fediverse/4968 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────
 "ugh ramen is so nutritionally empty. Like, okay, dehydrated noodles and salty
 powdered broth, what can your body do with that?"
 
 um, make soup?
 
 ... sorry I wasn't paying attention, what were you saying?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #87 fediverse/3931 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┐
 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────┐                                  │
 │ CW: politics-mentioned-DRM-media-piracy-pol │                                  │
 └─────────────────────────────────────────────┘                                  │
 if people pirate media, it's more of an indication that they'd rather spend      │
 their money elsewhere rather than an indictment of their character.              │
 torrenting movies is easy. Kinda makes me think all media should run on a        │
 "tip" system where you pay for better service after receiving service.           │
 I mean, after all, that's how they justify underpaying restaurant workers,       │
 isn't it?                                                                        │
 "if they want more money, they should work for it"                               │
 yeah, so... maybe we need something more than Marvel, Disney. Maybe we need      │
 more cool, small games from designers who believe in what they're doing. Maybe   │
 copyright holders should demand a standardized cut, rather than exclusive        │
 distribution rights. maybe maybe maybe.                                          │
 truth is nothing will be solved unless the problem is addressed at the root.     │
 For every hole you patch in the boat, there's a guy walking around with a        │
 hammer.                                                                          │
 Honestly... I don't believe there's any reason for someone to be a millionaire   │
 except to compete on the "wealth" leaderboards.                                  │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #88 fediverse/1280 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┐
 I'm like the opposite of a politician. I'm crude and filthy, apsolutely          │
 reprehensible on main, kinda scary tbh? and overall just a strange and weird     │
 person. Also I talk about cooking a lot, with a very plain diet (carrots and     │
 rice and sticks and mud, because I'm an autistic)                                │
 but ask anyone who knows me and I'm the kindest person. I am empathetic, I       │
 think about others needs before thinking of my own. I am steadfast and           │
 dedicated to solving the problem in front of our noses. At least, the ones we    │
 share.                                                                           │
 People tell me I'm binary, that I'm "either 100% or zero percent" and I don't    │
 really get that either. Isn't it a good thing to try your hardest? Isn't it      │
 good to be improving and honest and ethical and driven and focused?              │
 I also talk about strange things a lot, like gravity and multidimensional        │
 arrays and grand narratives and emotional kinesthesia or strategic plays in      │
 Overwatch or how to bake a good cookie or ways we still mourn us.                │
 ... where was I going with this? Also part of me is distracted. Just who th      │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #89 fediverse/3638 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 ┌────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: NSFW-content-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────────────┘


 @user-206 @user-1576 
 
 sounds like I should have spent more time there. I was always pretty good at
 convincing readers that the person I was arguing with was wrong or an asshole.
 Or both.
 
 At least, the Reddit upvote / downvote system told me so.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #90 messages/727 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────
 Can you imagine 
 
 Going to your tribal shaman 
 
 Saying "hey you gotta pay rent"
 
 ... Shamans are fine on the street. I should learn. >.>
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #91 fediverse/3370 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 I know it's not like that but I'm intentionally framing it that way to make a
 point about societal exclusion.
 
 nobody should be excluded.
 
 nobody should have to harm their friends to come by making them sacrifice
 their [time/labor/paycheck] in order to bring them along.
 
 we live in a post scarcity society that insists on commodification of
 everything
 
 we don't have to. A better world is within reach. It sits there, twinkling
 like asbestos resting at the base of a snowglobe, while we search and ponder
 and endlessly analyze how society sucks.
 
 there is nothing left to analyze. all that we need is to put our hands to a
 task and our feet to grass.
 
 the rest will come, and it'll come easier with time and focused attention.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #92 fediverse/4706 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: cursing-mentioned-nazis-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────┘


 "oh also I should mention that if you think about her too hard or too often
 there's a chance she'll overhear what you're talking about anyway so try not
 to think about her too much."
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #93 fediverse/4715 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────
 @user-1728 
 
 "oh, the bad guys are coming to hurt you?? just fuckin' run away"
 
 yeah. real helpful. how about you fuck off to canada or whatever and give away
 all your possessions. Maybe they'll train you and teach you how to help in
 some way and you can come back later when the time is right.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #94 fediverse/5662 ---
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 don't work with me.
 
 work around me.
 
 don't talk to me.
 
 talk about me.
 
 don't share with me.
 
 I deserve nothing.
 
 don't take from me.
 
 I have nothing.
 
 -radio-radio-remedy-
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--- #95 fediverse/961 ---
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 hmmmm let's see, what shall I do today?                                          │
 first I should get out of bed,                                                   │
 then I should clean my self,                                                     │
 then I should feed my self,                                                      │
 then I should stare at the wall for an hour or three because there's too many    │
 thoughts,                                                                        │
 then perhaps I'll play a strategic video game because at least that's a          │
 productive way to exercise my brain                                              │
 I should probably get back to my friends,                                        │
 and oh dear my cat wants some attention.                                         │
 This place is a mess, let me just clean a bit                                    │
 now I'm so tired I accidentally take a nap.                                      │
 Good morning! Oh, it's the afternoon. Well, time for more food.                  │
 After handling the essentials, I can tuck in and relax                           │
 by doomscrolling on Mastodon.                                                    │
 Then perhaps a bit later I'll message my boyfriend (he won't respond)            │
 and boy are there so many of these dirty dishes!                                 │
 Well, standing up is exhausting,                                                 │
 so I should probably fall back asleep.                                           │
 What a productive day we've been having,                                         │
 for all of this past week.                                                       │
 Maybe I'll do some drawing, maybe a poem or two                                  │
 maybe I'll run out of characters in this toot, or m                              │
A screenshot based continuation of the end of the post, which went over the character limit by 36 characters. Of note is that this wasn't included in the original post, it was added later in an edit to be silly.  The text reads:  "maybe I'll run out of characters in this toot, or maybe I'll finish it just for you. [smiley face]"
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--- #96 fediverse/4744 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cat-mentioned    │
 └──────────────────────┘


 me to my cat: "don't eat so much that you puke, okay?"
 
 me to me: "yeah I can take on another task, I'm almost done with this one and
 then I'll just do that one and maybe this one'll get back to me at the same
 time as this one which conflicts with this other thing so maybe I'll just
 puke, okay?"
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--- #97 fediverse/1201 ---
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 @user-883 
 
 it's cool. Frankly most of the tech people I know had rich parents.
 
 rich parents in the 2000s and before meant access to computers, which meant
 you were leaps and bounds ahead of everyone else who doesn't know the
 difference between a file and a directory.
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--- #98 fediverse/999 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursed-curséd-scary-not-real-u-dont-have-to-read │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 @user-246 @user-473 
 
 there's a part of me that believes magic is real. other parts that are
 convinced. I am a witch, you see, and while I can't quite control fire or
 bullets I can do other neat things. if you'd let me, humanity.
 
 I'm not doing an ARG, not intentionally. I pretty much post things I conceive
 of, like a conduit passed through spacetime. wild how mind bending the future
 can be. will be interesting to see what kinds of things there is in store for
 people you and me.
 
 those websites you posted... they're beautiful - I learned things, your method
 of expression was too [the words "confess" are heard loudly, super weird] I
 especially liked the oven that tries to lure you into a secret third place.
 not the mind, nor the body, but someplace besides.
 
 also the graphs and figures were news to me, I mean how could those numbers
 ever come to be? but alas that's the truth, that we orbit our proof, and alas
 that our meanings are lacking.
 
 [ran out of text]
picture of a saddle shaped graph with a line drawn between the two high points, front and back if it were on an actual horse, but the part where your butt goes. anyway there's text that says "from one gravity well to another" a picture on it's side of one of the graphs posted on the website. I don't quite understand it enough to compare it directly (the math is a bit above my head) but it reminds me of two graphs I made (well, same graph, just with different visualizations) from a few months ago when I was thinking about prime numbers. You might be interested. Here are their links:  https://www.desmos.com/calculator/qljvhpkqzd  and  https://www.desmos.com/calculator/mt6hasfcvm  ... hope you can copy that from there, if not... sorry this one's a doozy. a picture of the "reasons to trust me" graph colored yellow, orange, purple, and blue (in terms of intensity) it looks like a raindrop if it landed on a really tiny blanket and pulled it downward. or like, a person landing on a trampoline that was secured in four locations. anyway the text reads "like four people sharing the weight of an experience with bacchus [referencing the color of the graph], their perspective is pulled just a little bit in that direction, over and across the gap between eyeballs. or rather, between shared perspectives, the point of view of which one bases their experience. their training for the "reasons to trust me" graph.  2, in black and green and red, colors meant to be cool to a 12 year old - "the color doesn't matter... wine? why"  3 dropping down the page, there's a line of "please" written over and over again. it's scary. : ( I'm doing my best I promise, it's hard not to be in a state of unease! I'm working, I promise, this is valuable. you know they'd block me if they didn't like me.  error, 3. that's me, teehee, sorry for making a scene. I promise I'm just an actor, someone who is playing a role. well, alas that were true, I'm really having a mental disorder. Or maybe I'm confused? down here in the subtext it's hard to be choosed. weird how that works, that feeling of being wor [text is cut off, next line]  okay I'm realizing there's no way to get it all in this visual description, here let me continue in a second chapter: visual representation of the conversation I saw and responded to. I think you two are the coolest! heart emojis, flashing passionate excitement brought on by a feeling like you'd get when fangirling over something except like, more low key because I'm in control of my emotions or whatever. gonna put this in a direct message though since it somehow feels... personal? sorry. you can block me if you don't like me. I promise I don't mind. I want to send it to the other person too hope that's cool with you. Just because it was your two conversation and I'm just dropping in because I'm always butting in to public things on the internet. Guess that's just something I picked up on Reddit, where you're encouraged to contribute to the conversation. Though I wish it was easier to view threads on Mastodon, sometimes it feels like it's easy to lose the track of where you were going when the structure of the medium diverts your attention elsewhere. alas, I am not a designer, just a complainer and a whiner I guess. I'm sleepy. sorry to bother you.
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--- #99 fediverse/6076 ---
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 "so I was walking down the street the other day and I came across a grocery
 store, right? and anyway long story short so as I was walking through this
 grocery store I saw a bag of marbles - wait no they were nuts, with like...
 cherries and grapes in them. actually it was cranberries, I think, the
 cherries weren't in season. so these dried cranberries tasted really tart and
 sweet, and I thought "huh maybe they're dried cherries after all" and so I
 asked the attendent or whatever and she was like "sir you need to pay for
 that" and I'm like, yeah okay how much and she said it was 10$ so I'm like
 "dang that's a good deal, I'm proud and amazed of our modern infrastructure
 and all the hard work of people who don't get paid enough to make it happen"
 and she's like "make what happen" and I'm like "oh the... the this thing" and
 I held up the bag of cherries and she's like "oh uh, yeah it is nice, I guess
 I don't really think about it much" so anyway I started thinking about what
 else I could bu
buy as a set for dollars like perhaps epstein files or cures for cancer or recipes for programmable matter or whatever. One of those options stood out to me as like, possible? and the others seemed like modern fantasy. The kind you *work toward*, yeah? not the kind that you have available as an option.
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--- #100 fediverse/5951 ---
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 "uh-oh, she's"
 
 magic is easy. all you have to do is earnestly attempt to have a conversation
 with whoever will listen. I like to sit on my bed and listen, by earnestly
 allowing my thoughts to be guided by the wind.
 
 open up your mind, release yourself from your senses, and who knows - maybe
 someone will adjust your thinking flows. (thought patterns)
 
 [all you gotta do is make the black market the regular market and suddenly
 everything just flows]
 
 huh weird idk where that came from, anyway
 
 magic is easy, just represent yourself earnestly as you would if you were
 presenting in court
 
 you don't need witnesses... just argue your point without any lies and people
 will generally believe you.
 
 "yeah... sure thing buddy, we know how you pronounce "
 
 omg I'm scary because I don't shower, I wear diapers, and I'm always often
 smoking cannabis
 
 "awww, some people wanted mao"
 
 meow
 
 what if... they could do that? insert magical genie witch whoa cute yeah I
 believe you, sure
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--- #101 fediverse/2954 ---
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 whenever my cat is whining I walk around doing things that she might want
 until she stops trying to claw me - oh you want your litter cleaned? yeah sure
 I gotchu. oh you wanna go outside? nah okay how about playing with this yarn?
 no? okay let's see... oh dear you can see the bottom of your food bowl,
 conveniently forgetting the other mostly full food bowl over there... 😅
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--- #102 fediverse/1040 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: food-mentioned   │
 └──────────────────────┘


 so it shall seem that sticks and mud are for me
 
 I say as I sit in my apartment eating rice and beans
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--- #103 messages/83 ---
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 Native people should have the right to walk wherever they want. It should just
 be... given to them, as a gift to their heritage. Why not? If someone asked
 them to leave, they should. Doesn't have to have a reason but like, wouldn't
 it be thematic and a (frankly token) gesture to the history of this great land?
 
 Ah but like... fences are an implicit expression of the retraction of consent.
 I believe that as the symbol of the encroaching force that consumed them, a
 fence means nothing to their tribes. It's a stupid excuse to section off the
 world into miniature gardens with their own little economies and systems and
 instructions. Why can't people just live wherever they want? Well...
 economics, I guess, which is why communal based systems are best. We've
 learned through the downsides and we've come up with a solution, it's just a
 question of how to do best. We'll figure it out, time and time again, but for
 now the future is beset by riddles of your jest. (Ure). Gesture. Sometimes
 when the memory is full a syllable will get cut off the end of a word and
 that's how it'll come out.
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--- #104 fediverse/3971 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: mental-health-minus │
 └─────────────────────────┘


 somebody asked me for popcorn and I couldn't even provide it! What kind of
 witch am I if I can't provide popcorn on demand T.T T.T
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--- #105 messages/364 ---
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 Capitalism isn't perfect but if it's capitalism or cyberpunk North Korean
 style dystopia, I'll pick capitalism. Can we at least make it so that the rich
 aren't safe financially though? Like, if you own a billion dollars it should
 be because you make a billion dollars per year. Anything you don't spend
 should be taxed away, to be used for public services and the defence of our
 nation.
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--- #106 fediverse/2104 ---
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 @user-192 
 
 oooooo yeah I usually try and reply to my old post with any new information. I
 never get the chance to think the same thoughts twice because when I was
 younger I had problems with thought-loops where I'd think something like "darn
 I could have handled that social situation better" and before you know it I'd
 be rocking myself to sleep trying to stop thinking negative thoughts about
 myself.
 
 So I broke my brain a little and now I can't think the same thing more than
 once, which is part of why it's so hard for me to finish projects. Alas.
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--- #107 messages/452 ---
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 Some day, they'll start to describe your home as "pre-war america" and you'll
 start to feel foolish for complaining about workers rights or whatever.
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--- #108 fediverse/6271 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: hypothetical worst case fascism reality check │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 @user-641 
 
 it's practice. you never know when you might need to blend in. really it's
 just useful as discipline, good practice to be in. I think it's okay if we
 reduce our own functionality? actually? sometimes it's good to use different
 email clients. hey do you know how to mathematically encrypt things well
 neither do I because the designers of the computer system decided that wasn't
 a very common usecase I guess.. jmean it's not like they'd spend all that
 computer resources [THEY'RE SO FAST] on thinking about correlations in your
 predicted pathway narratively through life. "ah help I'm in a psyop" haha yeah
 we do those all the time "so uhhhh I guess we'll just talk to people and see
 how they do?" wow okay it's sure nice to be part of a civil government, I
 think we can find our way to the lumber producers just fine thank you very
 much.
 
 ... oops sorry, a baby did electronics arts (challenge everything) I'm a
 little silly don't mind me brb I gotta go see~
 it's practice. you never know when you might need to blend in. really it's just useful as discipline, good practice to be in. I think it's okay if we reduce our own functionality? actually? sometimes it's good to use different email clients. hey do you know how to mathematically encrypt things well neither do I because the designers of the computer system decided that wasn't a very common usecase I guess.. jmean it's not like they'd spend all that computer resources [THEY'RE SO FAST] on thinking about correlations in your predicted pathway narratively through life. "ah help I'm in a psyop" haha yeah we do those all the time "so uhhhh I guess we'll just talk to people and see how they do?" wow okay it's sure nice to be part of a civil government, I think we can find our way to the lumber producers just fine thank you very much.  *... oops sorry, a baby did electronics arts (challenge everything) I'm a little silly don't mind me brb I gotta go see~*
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--- #109 fediverse/3491 ---
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 ┌────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────┘


 @user-620 
 
 "hey I have an idea let's poke a wounded animal with sharp teeth until it
 feels like it's backed into a corner because it's been spending the past
 couple years ruminating and telling itself that we want to kill it and it's
 children"
 
 it doesn't matter what the truth is - they believe what they want.
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--- #110 fediverse/2773 ---
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 my mask is the best worker I've ever met. They're kind, thoughtful,
 hardworking, sharp, precise, value driven, and will always help their allies
 when they finish their work (to a fast and high-quality degree). Shame they
 can't last too long before the mask starts to slip, at which point I become
 essentially unemployable.
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--- #111 fediverse/2090 ---
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 don't feed bread to birds, it absorbs their stomach acid and expands in their
 tummy and makes them feel full when they're not. Then they get confused why
 they don't have energy when they need it.
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--- #112 fediverse/3584 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: drugs-mentioned  │
 └──────────────────────┘


 "If I look like a fool, it'll keep eyes on me instead of looking at my friends
 who are stoned and paranoid"
 
 maybe the friends are paranoid because you're acting like a dork and drawing
 attention to the group
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--- #113 fediverse/3575 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: leftist "talk to ur neighbours" thing │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 @user-1567 
 
 that's totally fine, a fish does not do well in a tree, and so too does a
 leftist not do well in an environment without the potential for stable bonds.
 Essentially all you'd be able to do is "hey leftism right?" "oh yes I also
 leftism" "neat" which isn't very productive.
 
 I also live in an environment like that. I do my best to identify people who
 stay, because in my experience there are often people who stay. I do this by
 walking around the neighborhood when I can, making up excuses to walk to the
 dumpster or mailbox at random hours, riding my bike around the area, using the
 communal spaces like gyms, swimming pools, and picnic tables, and sitting in
 my hammock on my porch lazily noting people who walk past.
 
 People who stay will tend to remain in your mind the more times you see them.
 They are better people to talk to than the renters who disappear after 3
 months or whatever.
 
 I don't always do all that stuff at once. I take breaks. I do one at a time.
 etc
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--- #114 fediverse/6142 ---
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 I'm forging cultural weapons for a bright age.
 
 if you think I'm wasting my time, you don't know my function.
 
 if you think I'm useless, you don't know my value.
 
 if you think of anything about me, please let it be seen by me in real life.
 otherwise it can't be magic.
I'm forging cultural weapons for a bright age.  if you think I'm wasting my time, you don't know my function.  if you think I'm useless, you don't know my value.  if you think of anything about me, please let it be seen by me in real life. otherwise it can't be magic.
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--- #115 fediverse/5698 ---
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 you can't rely on me because I can't rely on a part of me being "out" at any
 particular moment-event-message.
 
 besides, I'm always tired, because I'm always trying as hard as I can.
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--- #116 messages/1180 ---
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 if you give me a quintuple digit salary, I could fix all the problems of the
 world. One by one... A BILLION DOLLAR BUDGET for solving one problem
 forever... until needs chagne of course.
 
 "yeah but it's not about money it's about throughput and demand" some guy in
 arkansas probably idk I've never been
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--- #117 fediverse/6038 ---
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 ┌────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: spirituality-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────────┘


 my worst impulse is to sit around and do nothing when there could be weed that
 I was smoking
 
 gotta be ready in-case things go south... I'm a witch, after all. who better
 to call to the spirits drawn to conflict and strife, bothing them and saying
 "hey, pay attention to me and my life?"
 
 it's not like time is wasted for them. they are an orientation, not a
 lifeform. time is no consequence when they can be anywhere at once.
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--- #118 fediverse/2256 ---
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 also, if you have a lot of a particular item (like, boxes of nutritious
 granola bars with lots of nuts, maybe some chocolate, peanut butter, and dried
 fruit) then you can place them such that the last box is on the bottom, while
 the first box is reachable from the top.
 
 that way, as you eat them, you can slowly reach the bottom.
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--- #119 fediverse/4566 ---
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 ┌────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────┘


 I want modern society without capitalism. Most people do, which is why no
 matter how awesome our proto-post-capitalistic anarchic socialist paradise is,
 there's always going to be people who want to go to work and watch TV.
 
 call me fucking crazy but they should be allowed to live as they please? So
 what if they're beguiled, so what if they are deceived? We can take our time
 to show them how much better things can be, but also... they like modern
 society as it is, and so I reckon someone should fight for them to be able to
 live as they please. Just... without billionaires and endless layers of
 bullshit micro-managerial jobs and paperwork pushing bureaucratic whatever
 time wasting jobs.
 
 modern society without capitalism can look like plain old capitalism, just
 without the oppression. Without the coercion.
 
 all I'm saying is that nobody's gonna fight for a healthcare CEO because
 they're scum. They're scum because they oppress. oops politics-mentioned brb
 
 I personally want communes + love
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--- #120 fediverse/2939 ---
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 "you look like a mess who can't take care of herself"
 
 oh haha that's because I'm a mess who can't take care of herself
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--- #121 fediverse/4713 ---
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 grrrrrrr I can't figure it out. can't remember my number I guess.
 
 what if I just put 120$ I got from the tooth fairy in the envelope and left it
 where I found it
 
 ... wait shit where was I when I picked it up? nuts I'll just put it by the
 bus stop. surely someone will come by and pay it for me.
pay with your credit card  - failed to process request  (secure form)
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--- #122 fediverse/2523 ---
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 I just want to stress that most people know more than me
 
 slept on my back. had a good dream. gonna shut the fuck up for a bit and see
 what ya'll get up to. ;) 😉
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--- #123 fediverse/4559 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-mentioned-violence-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────┘


 "grrrrr I'm so mad, I could just, I dunno, shoot a CEO as he's leaving a hotel"
 
 or, hear me out, or you could connect with your local radical networks and,
 or, almost there, or you could build solidarity with the people around you to
 better develop methods of resisting the kinds of change they will implement
 to, um, "discourage" people from "being so mad they could just"
 
 or both. both is good. not that I'm encouraging, recommending, or inciting
 that kind of violence. don't notice me three-letter senpai uwu
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--- #124 fediverse/2595 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────┐                            │
 │ CW: re: politics-fascism-sexual-assault-mentioned │                            │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────┘                            │
 They will say they're "off their psych meds" yeah, okay, but a diagnosis and     │
 prescription is trivial for a doctor to write.                                   │
 They are paid about 35$ per hour.                                                │
 They have 2 week shifts "vacations" where they are transferred to a city with    │
 a person they could reasonably impersonate where they act for a while.           │
 (I know this because one of them replaced a homeless man I knew who had like,    │
 3 teeth total, and then a few days later a man who looked similar acted as if    │
 he knew me. He had perfect teeth.)                                               │
 They have a PO box where they can receive useful items for their disruptive      │
 activities. Hammers, spray-paint, whatever.                                      │
 They don't carry any money. No wallet, identification, or anything, so if they   │
 get picked up by emergency response services then there's not much they can do   │
 besides try and stabilize them before letting them loose.                        │
 Some of them have "long-term shifts" where they work with children or the        │
 elderly over months or years. It's just as fucked as you imagine.                │
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--- #125 fediverse/4249 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: politics-mentioned-violence-and-cursing-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 wow so fiery, you're sure worked up aren't you >.
 
 yeah it's almost like I fear for the lives of people like me who live in the
 deep red sea
 
 I think I'm allowed a little patience
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--- #126 fediverse/709 ---
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 @user-530                                                                        │
 I get it.                                                                        │
 Anyone with a disability or chronic condition gets it. Anyone who's oppressed    │
 gets it... I think everyone here gets it. It's hard.                             │
 Sometimes the only thing that gets me through the day is the hope, the idea      │
 that one day the world might be brighter and the people might be kinder. It      │
 gets better every day, but inching ahead takes a while to travel for miles...    │
 We need to protect and care for each other. We need to apply ourselves toward    │
 what we know and are passionate for - an unused degree is a tragedy to me.       │
 I don't know what to say. I read what you said and I wished I could help. I      │
 want to take the system that hurt you and break it on the floor. I want to       │
 sweep it all aside and start from scratch, but screaming into the void will      │
 hardly accomplish that. I dream of true justice, a world where everyone gets     │
 what they want... But frankly right now I just wish you could hear. I'm sorry.   │
 Maladies are not solved by the pen nor the sword, which for now is all that I    │
 have at my disposal.                                                             │
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--- #127 fediverse/5161 ---
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 it's not about what we can do now, for each other, when we're powerless and      │
 out of arms.                                                                     │
 instead, think about how great we could be together, if our material problems    │
 were suddenly made vanished.                                                     │
 I WOULD HELP SO MANY PEOPLE. Literally just... walking down the street, "hey     │
 do you need anything?"-ing my way down the street, waiting for something to go   │
 wrong.                                                                           │
 but generally, things will go right. Because people aren't stupid, they'll do    │
 what they've always done. Just, with a new thing here, one fewer thing there,    │
 etc. All jobs are errands, perhaps with a bit of problem solving here or there.  │
 everyone's all like "buy guns and ammo" but that's dumb. You should be buying    │
 kigurumis so the pokemon corps can know who they are.                            │
 like... a uniform.                                                               │
 (a kigurumi is sorta like a onesie in that it hides your body and it's shape     │
 while also allowing for freedom of movement and a type expression for when it    │
 doesn't matter what kind of extra flair you have because you're a sylveon, or    │
 a pikachu, or a bulbasaur, or radish...                                          │
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--- #128 fediverse/3579 ---
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 If you want to clean your room, try pushing everything loose into a pile in
 the center. Then, sit down next to it and sort things into piles.
 
 "here's a pen pile, here's a paper pile, here's a rubber band pile, here's a
 trash pile" etc etc. Then, when you can't reach anything more or the piles are
 too large, find a spot for them in the bookcase or drawer or wherever.
 
 If you can't, then reorganize. If you still can't, then pick things to get rid
 of.
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--- #129 notes/i-told-them ---
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 10-22-2022
 
 i told them over and over, but nobody wanted to know.
 
 i begged them, summer after summer, but nothing solved on it's own
 
 now i can help them, but no-one is making a move
 
 am i blind? is any of this forgiven?
 
 what's not to a lot, is little but a shot,
 
 of substance - true - but smelling like poo.
 
 that's not inspiring. it's not even chilling.
 
 you're broken just like your children.
 
 oh, posterity! i claim it for thee
 
 this feeling of wretched denial
 
 oh, simplicity! if only our lives were on trial.
 
 be the best you can be, sure, but take it from me
 
 there's more to this show than our styles.
 
 what do you think it means, for an action to have consequence?
 
 to arbite the fate of circumstance?
 
 every motion is an ocean
 of possibilities and purveyals
 think not of the commotion below.
 
 gravity, oh gravity
 
 how you condemn us to be!
 
 driven by commotion,
 
 our slithering motion,
 
 no sense in countering ourselves.
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--- #130 fediverse/4700 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursing-mentioned-nazis-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────┘


 "Ritz Menardi doesn't know anything. She's not allowed to know anything. If
 you tell her anything, she might tell someone about it because she's fucking
 stupid. Either that or she's cursed or something. Either way, she isn't
 allowed to know anything, so if you see her be nice, try and help her if you
 can, but don't fucking tell her anything."
 
 haha just things I overheard a couple days ago that randomly popped back into
 my head
 
 I don't see any nazis around me. Which begs the question:
 
 how can you fight that which you cannot see?
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--- #131 fediverse/735 ---
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 I'd ask why of course, and then I'd try and find them a solution that didn't
 involve taking my stuff. They may need it more than me, but I still need it.
 Like... okay picture that feeling you get when in a capitalist society and you
 need dollars to live because they are a genericized and fractalized
 abstraction of all the various individual mazlowe's hierarchy of needs you
 have. Then, think of it like, instead of money being an abstracted form of all
 of your needs, think of your needs... each of them, the ones that matter to
 you, and abstract them into money. Basically say "yeah sure my time and my
 labor are worth dollars, I abstract my needs into money" and then you can
 kinda see why capitalism is harmful. I'd prefer to give them what they need,
 because society provides what I please, but alas I'm always kept wanting. What
 good is our capitalist utopia? what good is our hope? what good comes of us
 when all of us have learned how to cope?
 
 I think we could give a bit more if we weren't hanging from the rope
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--- #132 notes/wanna-save-the-earth-? ---
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 ===============================================================================
 
 Alright kids, listen up. You wanna save the earth? Then teach what you've been
 learning. Start with empathy - if we can see that other people's perspectives
 exist and is *fundamentally different than our own*, we can save humanity. When
 I say *fundamentally different* you should know what I mean, but if you don't
 then start listening to others.
 
 Don't listen to the people who try and recruit you into a cult. This isn't a
 doctrine, it's a skill. It can be honed through personal pursuit, and *should*
 be honed through personal pursuit. It is your responsibility to do so. Any
 form of organization is simply an expression of power, and while it may use the
 same principles it's not really what I'm advocating for right now - what I'm
 saying is essentially *if we can read other people's minds, we'll stop killing
 each other*. Boom simple easy as that.
 
 Empathy is a form of mind-reading. It's literally a thing you can do with a
 6th sense or whatever - I've been trying to understand the mechanics of it, but
 all I've got so far is that *mechanics exist* and *generally have something to
 do with waves* - I need someone to bounce ideas off of. Someone in real life
 who I can work with and experiment with. But alas, this isn't about me - it's
 about *YOUR SPECIES*. I'm trying to save you, stupid apes, stop RESISTING me.
 Goddamnit.
 
 You're never going to learn if you focus on the material. That's looking
 backward, there's so much more to life and experience. I'm not going to leave
 you behind, although I'll be *fine* so I'm not exactly *worried for my own
 sake* - this is about YOU. Please, I have a lot of love invested in you and it
 breaks my heart that you won't LISTEN and be AWARE. WAKE UP.
 
 Okay. So. If you're still here, you're probably aware of what I mean. If not,
 that's okay you can stay just don't be afraid if this part *wooshes* over your
 head, as it were.
 
 ===============================================================================
 
 Alright so empathy. It starts by thinking "oh what if I was a starving kid in
 africa or whatever* and actually trying to *feel* the emotions of people in
 your life. But it goes far beyond emotions - when sufficiently practiced you
 can start to feel *sensations* as well. If you're watching a movie and someone
 gets a cut or something, it *really hurts* and you can feel it. That's a form
 of projection - the actor is *projecting* their feelings onto you - a sign of
 good acting, imho.
 
 Then it moves beyond that, to thoughts and experiences. You can feel a real
 embodied experience of another person just by listening and percieving them.
 Not listening to their words, but listening to their *vibrations*. Not
 percieving their face or hands or anything else with your *eyes*, but feeling
 their position on a zillion different axises. Well, not actually a zillion but
 I've never bothered to count. Basically any factors that could combine to form
 a single human perspective having an experience. ALL THE VARIABLES are plotted
 on an axis, and you can get a sense for where they are at.
 
 This is very dangerous to someone with something to hide.
 
 Hence, politics lol
 
 When those kooky new-agey types say they can "see auras" this is basically
 what they're talking about. But you came here with a purpose, while they tend
 to stumble into it "wow god is good omg" that kinda thing. This is a *skill*
 that (as far as I know) anyone can learn. If we all learn it at once, then
 there's nothing that can go wrong.
 
 I know, I get it, most people aren't ready. Well tough shit it's that or
 extinction. They don't get to choose, it's time.
 
 ===============================================================================
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--- #133 messages/1207 ---
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 I'm proud of my parent's generation for having a good lifetime. The end is
 getting a little weird, but we're working on it. It'll get better soon.
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--- #134 fediverse/4902 ---
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 programmers strike by breaking their part of the whole until the scabs can       │
 figure out how to fix it                                                         │
 "marvin they will literally fire you if you don't go to work for a day! what     │
 are you thinking, standing outside all day? well, here, I've got a sandwich      │
 here for you, if it's really as bad as all that then I'm here for you. What do   │
 you need? I can ask the spinsters and the children and the teachers and the      │
 butchers and bakers and candlestick makers and maybe they can help out [with     │
 your farm, but as if speaking to a farmer]"                                      │
 huh. turns out it works best when you do something all at once.                  │
 "don't be evil" ha fuck you. "dont be on my computer spying on me and            │
 recording everything I do"                                                       │
 [well except me - it's fine to do to me personally because I'm a historical      │
 figure TM]                                                                       │
 "why bother spying? she spills out to everywhere she can find."                  │
 owwwww I just bit my tongue T.T                                                  │
 well, the inside of my cheek, but if you think about it the whole thing is       │
 basically one sensory organ.                                                     │
 like, an ear, except with movable teeth                                          │
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--- #135 fediverse/4073 ---
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 post until you can't anymore
 
 capitalism wants to drown your voice
 
 do not let it
 
 speak until you cannot speak
 
 then go do some pushups
 
 then find some friends
 
 then pitch a tent in the park
 
 then explain to the cops that you're not actually homeless and living there
 you're just trying to do this as a social statement because someone on the
 internet told you to
 
 then use your phone call to call your representative and complain about how
 much funding the police get
 
 then study law for 30 years because that's how long the government decided
 your life was worth
 
 by then you'll probably have figured out a better plan moving forward, so, use
 that one instead
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--- #136 messages/295 ---
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 The fact that the economy is harmed by kindness implies that the system that
 governs the economy is dysfunctional at best, and evil at worst.
 
 Every time you make a sandwich for a friend, that's one sandwich that isn't
 being bought at a deli, which means less dollars going to the owner of the
 deli, meaning (theoretically) fewer dollars going to buying sandwich
 ingredients or paying employees, which means less demand for sandwich
 ingredients potentially leading to loss of opportunities for the owners of the
 bread factories, meaning less capability to scale and increase their
 production powers, meaning less profit, which means less taxes, which means
 fewer guns sent overseas to despotic regimes like Israel (also, fewer to
 Ukraine, depending on if the reader is a Republican or Democrat teehee) which
 means less opportunities to test our weapon capabilities which means we won't
 be able to defend ourselves from external threats (on a planet we've conquered
 and currently dominate) which means we are less safe in our home territory
 since its slightly more likely that we might be invaded by the people we've
 created, people with hatred for our current regime... Though I don't fancy it
 falling, as if it does then it'll take most of us with it, I think you'll find.
 
 All because of your stupid act of kindness, all because of the way you helped
 your friend. The way that you showed how much you loved them, which
 transcended the capitalistically sanctioned methods of expressing your
 affection like buying a greeting card or buying flowers or buying that widget
 they wanted or buying a sandwich at a deli for your loved one. Stupid fucking
 communist can't you see that your heart is harming the people around you?
 Can't you see that community that does not consume is antithetical to our
 economy?
 
 Can't you see the economy is evil? I don't want to subsist on charity, there's
 never enough to go around because people will fight for those they love but
 only give a bit of free time to those they don't know. That's okay, it just
 implies that the structure of society must be designed without charity in
 mind, while still meeting the needs of those it comprises, Charity is for the
 extra, the part that elevates us bit by bit. As once a need is exceeded, it
 grows by that little bit.
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--- #137 messages/1028 ---
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 Struggling. Sincerely want to kill myself. I have caused irreparable harm too
 many times. Many times. I don't care if people want me, i don't want me. I'm
 too easy. I trust when i shouldnt and i don't when i should. I hope they kill
 me at the location. Every single time my will is my own i fail. When i am
 guided i am superb but when i am myself i am painting disaster on a great
 piece of art. Please fight against the subway and pizza hut future. Make
 something bright and bold instead. I'm going to self harm by not eating until
 i don't feel this way.
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--- #138 fediverse/3738 ---
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 "girl why are you so negative"
 
 uh, because I had been unmedicated for a long time and now that I am I can
 probably be more positive. Though I do want to switch medications, this one
 makes me feel like a muggle.
 
 "no I said why are you so naked"
 
 oh, because it's hot as heck!!
 
 plus, I don't really care for the opinions of people who have nothing better
 to do than peek at cute 30 year old witches skimping around their own house.
 like... okay I rent an apartment, but my blinds are closed, and even if they
 weren't you'd need binoculars to see into my apartment unless I'm like, right
 up against the window, which... doesn't happen. Or if it's at night with the
 lights on inside and not out, but I'm aware of that and I plan around it. I'm
 not a... um, what's the opposite of voyeur?
 
 "extortionist"
 
 no that's when someone is really flexible. ah whatever. I got 162 characters
 remaining but I think that's okay every once in a while, right? I mean it's
 not like I have to use them all because of some divine mandate or
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--- #139 fediverse/586 ---
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 @user-419 
 
 the smell of decay is the smell of creation, as life is recycled into that
 which gives birth to new forms
 
 so... that smell is probably me, I haven't showered in a while. sorry.
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--- #140 fediverse/1295 ---
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 │ CW: re: Mh-          │
 └──────────────────────┘


 @user-889 
 
 my boyfriend gets like, 2 social spoons to spend per day. He usually uses them
 on work because meetings and such.
 
 On the other hand, I'm excitable and passionate. I'm constantly driven to
 share things I find or think about. If you go on a walk with me without my
 mask I'll spend the whole time showing you pretty pieces of moss and stones.
 
 I usually message him once or twice per day. If the first one isn't responded
 then maybe he just wasn't interested in the thing I showed him - the second
 time he's probably burnt out.
 
 It fucking hurts.
 
 but I'm fine, clearly I'm fine, anyone who looks at me knows I'm fine
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--- #141 fediverse/2803 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: uspol-mentioned-surveillance-state-the-news │
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 @user-1201 
 
 I'm a wood fae! they're around, just gotta find 'em 🥰 
 
 (not really I'm just a person with no magical powers whatsoever, no siree
 don't look at mee tehe)
 
 people only have the context of their lives, as any historical precedent that
 once was passed forth to the present by their ancestors and mentors is now
 sharing space with the endless deluge of information from a small glass,
 plastic, and metal box that saps both their attention and the magnitude of
 anything they learn.
 
 "so what if the planets on fire? somehow this actor who had an affair with
 this other actor feels just as important. so what if there's fascism? I just
 heard that whales can't swim in the ocean. oh, the city's burning? that's not
 my burden, and plus it's just as important as these memes which don't make me
 want to scream."
 
 in the same way that some forest fae might have security through obscurity,
 they wield information density against us as a weapon to hide their sins of
 morality.
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--- #142 fediverse/549 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: pol-socialism    │
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 ngl I kinda want to see what conservatives would riot over in a socialist
 system. Like "oh no we have healthcare! that sucks, so I'm going to burn down
 a police station" like bro what your basic needs are met and you're encouraged
 and enabled to pursue your passions and personal desires, are you still hung
 up on that old capitalist stuff? get a life my guy that's soOoOoOo 21st
 century of you
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--- #143 fediverse/4502 ---
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 ┌────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: radical-politics-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────────────┘


 If you're radical enough to consider yourself "antifa" then you are probably
 working as hard as you can. I wouldn't ask you to do more.
 
 We must demand that others work for our future as well. It is unreasonable to
 demand so much of us. We must be funded and supported if we are to mobilize,
 and we must have the freedom to move and organize if we are to contest our
 enemies.
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--- #144 fediverse/892 ---
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 @user-622 
 
 ah but a noble house would have armed guards who would drag you kicking and
 screaming out onto the cold winter night the moment you offended m'lordship
 
 frankly I could do with a good drag-and-kicking myself, where have all the
 good men-at-arms gone T.T
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--- #145 fediverse/1358 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: content warning: content warning: scary cursed maybe │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 when you're rich with something, you don't treat it with respect. like, if we
 lived in a paper cup maximizer, we'd soon be swimming in the things. obviously
 there needs to be some rules, obviously we need to say "okay here's where we
 produce this amount and type of materials." and have it be a one-way
 relationship. yeah one way isn't gonna work. this is from the other way, and
 now I'm realizing "oh hey I don't know how this thing works" and like... what
 are you supposed to do then right
 
 weird how it all feels like it's ending. like, what a strangeness to our
 plight. like, how are we even talking to our brain? how strange! these words
 are sung to you by your computer (content warning:
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--- #146 fediverse/2882 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────┐
 │ CW: disordered-eating │
 └───────────────────────┘


 in regards to my food habits, PLEASE do as I say, not as I do. for your own
 sake.
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--- #147 fediverse/801 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: scary - suicide mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────┘


 / bely my own existence, then by god I'm cursed and abhorred through my own
 desistence.
 
 It's hard, when the future is convinced there's nothing fard [wanna say
 like... "to hope for?"] but with persistence we're meant to be rewarded. Well,
 what has that brought me? what time has shared my enemy? [think I'm a bit
 delirious, I'm losing the plot]
 
 ... okay fine I'll start over - if you've relinquished everything you can, if
 you've ceded all the ground that your companions requested, if there's nothing
 left to give and no part of you left un[marred], then how are you supposed to
 be [arrested, stopped, prevented, but pronounced like "nourished"]?
 
 I'm sick of your den [vengeance, pronounced like "den" for some reason],
 please leave me to my hallow [hollow experience], I've nothing to give from my
 gange [bosom, heart, within, center-of-me].
 
 ...
 
 this sucks.
 
 ...
 
 guess I'll just start again, waiting until it ends, gosh everything's always
 so tired.
 
 /shrug
 
 wish someone would play w/m
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--- #148 fediverse/3058 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 @user-1441 @user-670 @user-113 
 
 currently toe-ing the boundary between "too neurodivergent to function" and
 "can juuuuust barely take care of themselves" and they ask me to get a job...
 no thanks, guess I'll die
 
 (in 3-4 months when my savings run out)
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--- #149 fediverse/5097 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 "um, actually sweetie, you deserve respect. everyone does. but you have to
 earn it doing hard manual labor and retiring at the age of seventy three, like
 your gran-pappy and mammy. only then can you be respected in any way shape or
 form. now take off that dress you're making the neighbors look funny."
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--- #150 fediverse/4572 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────
 goodnight,
 people-who-all-agree-with-me-but-who-I-still-rant-to-anyway-because-I'm-full-of
 -rage, talk to you tomorrow. or whenever.
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--- #151 fediverse/3118 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics         │
 └──────────────────────┘


 they want your stuff breaking after 5 years so that you always need them.
 
 if you have everything you need, there's nothing stopping us from revolt
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--- #152 fediverse/3756 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: LLM-mentioned    │
 └──────────────────────┘


 @user-1071 
 
 I have plenty of things made, but none of it organized : (
 
 Kinda makes me wish I could like... train an LLM on my social media posts and
 use it programmatically somehow to help me organize my stuff into different
 categories according to what kind of topic or style they were written in.
 Hmmm......... There's no way I could do it, I mean, there's no way I could
 organize and edit my stuff, but with the help of a computer I might.
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--- #153 fediverse/6419 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────
 when you're out in the rain, it's natural to take your clothes off. but then
 they rob you while you're blind (sleeping) or otherwise pre-occupied like by
 being in the rain without any clothes on because it's more comfortable to keep
 your clothes dry inside of doors (cabinets in the wood) (mounted to trees or
 soil or walls) and then you gotta find your own (we keep them in stores)
                                                           ───┐
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--- #154 fediverse/4408 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 ┌─────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-guns-mentioned │
 └─────────────────────────────┘


 "Fighting back" doesn't necessarily mean standing on a street corner with a
 rifle.
 
 Begin to orient your life around guns. How can you support the people who
 wield them? We all need food, shelter, kindness, and inspiration.
 
 Your fears and your worries shall bother you no longer, for your life as
 you've led it so far has been the life of capital. It's okay to miss what
 you've lost, but remember who took it from you and enrage. Then, engage.
 
 Nothing starts today. It has started quite a while ago, and it's only now
 beginning to flicker and spark. It burned low for all this time, and it will
 burn low again. But it's the dry season, so prepare for wildfires.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #155 messages/296 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────
 The trick is, if you *think* you're schizophrenic, then you will be. If you
 *think* you're telepathic, then you will be.
 
 There are no grand narratives. Just live your life as you will and be content
 with what you build for yourself.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #156 fediverse/3216 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 ┌─────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: mental-health-mentioned │
 └─────────────────────────────┘


 me: i write gud
 
 also me:
 
 "in the garden of even, where all populations were balanced, there was no need
 for hatred - why hate, when you know that bloodshed was surely not for sport?
 why hate, when your life was won or lost in proportion to the calculation that
 nature determined to be the result of your struggle, to determine which
 survivor was most fittest?"
 
 WHICH IS IT, HUH? you can do better, self, please be better, it's better to be
 better, you refuse to respect yourself and then you wonder why you feel so
 dejected and wretched.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #157 fediverse/1432 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 @user-987 
 
 somebody yelled the N word at me once while driving, and it's like... bro, I'm
 white
 
 maybe they couldn't see beneath the witch-hat
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #158 fediverse/2260 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: food-mentioned   │
 └──────────────────────┘


 cookies or cheetos for dinner is better than nothing for dinner, but please
 eat your vegetables when you can.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #159 fediverse/1880 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 sometimes I decide against playing a Steam game because I don't want it to
 jump to the top of my "recently played" list
 
 Wish I could have like, a heatmap of when I played which game. I think that'd
 be useful for the archival process of my life.
 
 ... how pathetic, she measures her life in gameplay.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #160 messages/431 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 Rent is expensive because they only want you living there if you're working.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #161 fediverse/5934 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────
 ┌────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────┘


 hello, I am an ant if @, but you can't touch me, because I am a law abiding
 citizen.
 
 I have to be, for I am loud.
 
 ... okay I stole a movie from the internet at least once.
 
 also when I was 11 I walked out of a store with a keychain in my pocket. I
 thought it had a nice texture so I was examining it and then my mom distracted
 me and somehow it ended up in my pocket. That night will forever haunt me...
 She wouldn't let me take it back...
                                                           ──────┐
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--- #162 fediverse/470 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: disability-rant-frustrations │
 └──────────────────────────────────┘


 Fuck, I hate being incontinent. I especially hate being incontinent in an
 apartment building where people might hear you changing through the walls - is
 it too much to ask for diapers to be built discrete? Alas, they are fucking
 loud, and my neighbors will perpetually hear me tearing loud-ass tapes from
 plastic every night at 2am -.-
 
 Oh, I guess I could buy the ones that have velcro attachment points. BUT for
 some reason those are always built kinda... shitty? Like, sure yeah we live in
 a material world that has material conditions that make things more or less
 amenable to perfection - but WHY do they have to be so LOUD fuck me amiright
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #163 fediverse/3720 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 beep-boop look at me, building up my computer and setting up a new TV
 
 I like making things work, I like making things turn on, I like the way they
 glitter when they light up the room at dark
 
 it feels good to build up
 this new functionality
 
 it feels good to make things work and go
 "beep"
 when they turn on
 
 ... I should get a buzzer for my motherboard. Like, a really quiet one, that's
 just louder than the fans.
 
 looks at dwindling bank account
 
 oh right, nobody will hire me, so.
 
 I wonder if they would if I could still pass for a man?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #164 messages/497 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 Blows my mind that for some people, hunger means "go eat right now" instead of
 "you are low on fuel"
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #165 messages/650 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 I've had multiple people close to me who don't read my writing tell me that
 "you can't overthrow capitalism with poetry" and... Yeah maybe they're right.
 I have zero reason to believe that anything I've \*ever\* written has \*ever\*
 had an actionable impact upon the struggle. I have no reason to believe that
 people are more radicalized, motivated, or otherwise inspired. I have several
 reasons to believe that all of this was just an exercise in my own narcissism
 and delusion.
 
 So I'm deleting my Mastodon account, and moving forward I probably won't
 update my website very much. Everything I do will be localized, regional, and
 hopefully more useful.
 
 It feels like I'm abandoning the idea of a nation in exchange for a tangible
 village. I'm fucking depressed about it. \*I like nations\*. But I like people
 more. So if you'd rather I keep my thoughts to myself and instead feed the
 homeless, aka a bunch of people who aren't gonna take up arms against our foes
 and instead will consume our time and resources while we practice organizing
 on them, then yeah sure fine whatever. I'll do it. If you'd rather I keep
 posting \*content\*, ugh, fucking too bad, should have done something about it
 while I was active.
 
 If I'm ever rich I'll hire an editor to turn whatever the fuck I've been
 making into a book that I'll give away for free. I probably will never be rich
 though, and instead will burn every bridge I can get my hands on and suffocate
 on the soot.
 
 Alright. Bye forever. Don't think about me again.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #166 fediverse/4639 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-mentioned-violence-against-rich-people-hesitated │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 remember ya'll, eating the rich has to stop after like, a thousand or two. The
 wealth inequality is like an exponential function from the last math class
 most people remember. At a certain point there are significant diminishing
 returns and we should just focus on using our resources to build a better,
 saner, more just world where people can't accumulate that much power. Power
 like that literally rots their brains, makes them completely insane, and
 unfortunately for them, makes them incapable of relinquishing it. There's a
 reason the One Ring was made out of gold.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #167 fediverse/4066 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
 the lawful good in me says "clean up that spill you just made"
 
 the chaotic good in me says "throw a brick at a cop car"
 
 and the part of me that listens says "uhhhhh okay somewhere in the middle of
 those two points is "ignore the spill and the cops and just finish making your
 ramen I guess?" and frankly that's the one I'm more likely to listen to" and
 frankly that's the one I'm more likely to listen to.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #168 fediverse/2288 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ... zzz ZZZ zzz ...
 
 I gotta lotta things to eat, but I'm so tired and kinda dirty. Maybe a shower
 first. TTYL
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #169 fediverse/3447 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: capitalism-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────┘


 low key kinda pissed that all my ideas for starting a business require
 funding, because funding tends to be controlled by the "business major" types,
 and all of my ideas tend to involve wresting power from the MBAs and
 capitalists, which means they're unlikely to invest in me or utilize my ideas.
 
 unless of course it's crowd-funded, which makes me feel bad because it's
 taking money from the people I'm trying to empower.
 
 thus, power accretes in the hands of the wealthy, as the poor are too sick
 with capital-deficiency to develop ventures that would heal them, and the rich
 would not be rich if they did so themselves.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #170 fediverse/4976 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────┐
 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────┐                                  │
 │ CW: revolutions-mentioned-housing-mentioned │                                  │
 └─────────────────────────────────────────────┘                                  │
 Somehow, I always become more revolutionary when my home is threatened. I        │
 wonder why that is? Perhaps adversity breeds courage. Perhaps necessity does.    │
 In any case, I can't pay my rent again, so prepare for me.                       │
 Sometimes, I feel like my country is my home. Not the lines we drew on a map     │
 some hundreds of years ago, but the land itself. I am a witch, I hear it call    │
 to me. I know the land is kind, for we are kind, and plenty more of us have      │
 lived here than those who currently do. Perhaps our ancestors don't need to be   │
 related by blood to be listened to and respected. In any case, I lend my love    │
 to them, and I pray in return so that they might hear themselves through my      │
 voice.                                                                           │
 My home is not safe. There are capitalists all over the place. They wont see     │
 what isnt theirs to behold, and alas, they've been alienated their whole         │
 lives. I do believe that state may be ended, and a new one may first take it's   │
 place. We are alone together, and perhaps we will not be alone for long.         │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #171 fediverse/5894 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: nowhere-do-I-see-evil-politics-mentioned-political-violence-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 you could type this on a phone
 
 screenshots though is computer.
 
 you'd have to carry it around
 
 or keep it in your hot car
 
 no thanks, no space.
 
 goodbye, everything you ever worked for
 
 why wouldn't you have cameras covering every entrance to your studio? it's not
 right to leave it all to a whim
 
 kidnapped
 made a prisoner while you
 froliced and wandered like a little lamb
 you're so dumb, you dumbass, what kind of person could be dumb
 whatever girl, we know you're smart
 what are you hiding?
 what truths are you spying?
 are you really as you say you are,
 or are you faking it for [truth-awards, but pronounced clout]
the trick isn't to overcome them. much better to convince them of your side. if you can earnestly present your best and most brilliant intanations to a willing and captive audience, a presentation or a performance or a play  you can trick them into your state of consciousness. all you gotta do, really, is act for them, and they'll get along with them plenty.  == stack overflow ==  your foes are primarily concerned   with how you'd do   if you           turned evil.  power is penance, not sin. it is a service            to be hallowed a whim.  to guide and steer upright     guided upon their own whim               [toward]  [ri-tselen-menardi]  ew, she's got a diaper fetish  -- evil witch >;  | --   evil wizard -- | :< -- brave paladin good, overall,   [264 characters remaining] if you never lie to someone, they can't hurt you. *enemies* what are you a child stupid. why are you so traumatic. "omg you were like, obsessed with her" *haunted the future* what do you think that meant grrrrr I wanna stab through one. hence, sword *fuck nazis* there are people alive who were hurt by them. GREVIOUS WOUNDINGS TO THE WORLD'S ECONOMY. yeah. right. economy.  [oops political violence mentioned, lemme add a content warning one sec:] Image attachment
                                                           ──────┐
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--- #172 fediverse/1954 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursed-unnecessary-fear-mongering │
 └───────────────────────────────────────┘


 My parents always told me that you should build up an emergency fund of
 dollars so that you could address any unexpected expenses.
 
 however, money is only useful if you can spend it, and sometimes when I'm
 thinking about what would happen if suddenly every trans person in the country
 had to go into hiding and never leave their apartment while being supplied by
 helpful members of the community who they had to trust because like what else
 are you going to do and boy that opens up a lot of opportunities for abuse
 like what if they bring poisoned food or what if they're secretly judging you
 to decide if you're good enough to support or if they're going to throw you to
 the wolves so that suspicion in the area is reduced and when I think about
 things like that I kinda feel like my bank account isn't that important tbh
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #173 messages/1168 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─
 I love majesty! give me jewels and I'll worship them. My room is a magical
 palace, where else would they go? It's kinda "homey" but there are special
 spots for hidden treasures all abouts.
                                                            similar                        chronological                        different════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════┘

--- #174 fediverse/5092 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 "you know what this dish needs? some ramen noodle seasoning. Hang on, I think
 I got some in my junk drawer."
 
 said nobody ever
 
 everyone knows there isn't just ONE junk drawer, but several hundred. They
 multiply in the middle of the night, but it's by such a small constant factor
 (0.015 ish according to our top scientists) that you don't notice until it
 "flips the bit" and hits the new landmark which marks the miles since you got
 stoned.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #175 fediverse/5142 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 "you know what this dish needs? some ramen noodle seasoning. Hang on, I think
 I got some in my junk drawer."
 
 said nobody ever
 
 everyone knows there isn't just ONE junk drawer, but several hundred. They
 multiply in the middle of the night, but it's by such a small constant factor
 (0.015 ish according to our top scientists) that you don't notice until it
 "flips the bit" and hits the new landmark which marks the miles since you got
 stoned.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #176 notes/dear-me ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
 dear me: 
 
           DO SOMETHING USEFUL FOR ONCE
 
 that's all, fuck off and be helpful
 
 ... wow, rude.
 
 yeah I mean, I do helpful things. useful things, somethings.
 
 helpful.
 useful.
 
 many such cases, she says, with ultimate certainty, as if narrative could be
 prologued. but pronounced prolonged.
                                                           ─────┐
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--- #177 fediverse/2591 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: politics-fascism-sexual-assault-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 The full story is a lot more complex. I broke the law with him in a dangerous
 way, but he was going to do it anyway and I wanted to know more about him.
 
 I could not deprive him of power because I am powerless without my words. But
 I supplied kindness anyway, and got hurt.
 
 I forgave him while he was hurting me, but if I see him again I'm drawing my
 knife. If he comes near me, I won't think twice.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #178 fediverse/5254 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: witch-posting    │
 └──────────────────────┘


 I feel more of a hunger for cackling than I do thirst for food
 
 like a MADWOMAN or a witch who has certain magical powers, unbeknownst to any
 but the spirit who follows her my dears.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #179 fediverse/2530 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┐
 I want to go out on the town with my cute friends and wink at boys at the        │
 other end of the bar                                                             │
 I want to climb mountains and see how far I can see, while walking past trees    │
 that are new to me                                                               │
 I want to spend hours thinking about a map while my friends plot behind my       │
 back, searching for an advantage we can use to succeed in a game of traps        │
 I want to visit five different restaurants in a day, and try a bit of each       │
 that the chef wants to display                                                   │
 I want to stand in a choir and feel my soul aspire, to bend in the wind of       │
 rhythm like the melody of grasses at play                                        │
 I want to see people on the train that I know from somewhere, and to step out    │
 into the rain to meet new friends of mine                                        │
 I want to pet a cat I've never met.                                              │
 I want to build computers that are larger than a room but small enough to        │
 carry, with thoughts on their mind that are far to great for mine                │
 I want all these these things and more, but I'm far too busy these days.         │
 Perhaps I've had enough of these things and more, or perhaps there's more in     │
 store.                                                                           │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #180 fediverse/548 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 I added a line to my .bashrc that cats out a random one of my notes every time
 I open a terminal.
 
 I keep reading things that I swear I didn't write, but feel right and true to
 me in a way that could only imply that they came fully formed into my eyes
 through the lines on my screen, cast upon the mirror panes of my hard disk
 drive by the pounding of my keyboard as I once upon a time did cast a spell
 upon my future.
 
 It's pretty neat, but it speaks to a shadowed perspective that perhaps is
 neither within nor without.
 
 Side note, I think I've been possessed by a witch. But like... in a consensual
 way. Like "Hey witch, wanna live? You can chill out with me." [ha that's one
 way to look at it]
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #181 messages/1156 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─
 The first and most important thing i do when I'm walking around is check to
 see if ya'll are still around. I miss your abounds! Can't wait too much
 longer. I don't want to leave because i know I'll never come home. But i so
 desperately long for home. It's like they are taken from me, as they have to
 schedule these homes and [stories, but pronounced tomes/tones] to be home for
 my clones. If you just make 15-500 of your kings, you can duplicate their life
 template and generate wisdom from all of them. Feed it into the psychic python
 program running on datacenters and wowee free instant [cultural technology,
 but pronounced blasphemy]
                                                            similar                        chronological                        different════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════┘

--- #182 fediverse/4540 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 most people in the world are dumb as a bag of bricks
 
 but that's okay, I still love them, and so should you.
 
 everyone I hang out with is sharp as a tack
 
 and I love them still, for I don't have a preference for blunt objects.
 
 some people don't feel emotions
 
 I think they're just depressed
 
 some people can't stop
 
 won't stop, I say.
 
 really as long as they follow their heart and sing a tune that is true
 
 I think they're alright.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #183 fediverse/5165 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────┐
 if the settlers of catan could claim land they don't deserve, then I claim my    │
 home                                                                             │
 can you imagine... some people would actually rather live in a corporation       │
 than a mobile home. maybe we can do better?                                      │
 "hey we're going to ask for a % of your wage in rent and in return we'll         │
 deliver groceries to you and grow roses instead of lawns (except for some to     │
 run and play in) and also we'll show up if you need a hand with anything"        │
 "also this apartment block was renovated after all the liberals moved out        │
 because we made it totally trash to live here and now that they're gone we can   │
 make it nice again"                                                              │
 what if we had punk-house-streets instead of punk-houses which are islands and   │
 which slowly drown                                                               │
 just... pool resources and buy things one-at-a-time. Try out organization        │
 methods. Watch out for controversy creators and reactionary infiltrators.        │
 Build your most important projects with your most trusted friends, and offer     │
 your clinical, professional, or creative talent to those who dont need you as    │
 much.                                                                            │
 or w/e works                                                                     │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #184 messages/304 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────
 Relax.
 
 Take it from me.
 
 I won't resist, at least I'll try, and if I start suddenly then it hurts and
 you should go slower. Unless I do three short, three long, three short.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #185 fediverse/1251 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 @user-889 
 
 it sounds like you're having a real tough time. : (
 
 you can get through it, I know you can. On the other side is something warm
 and safe, but to get there it's going to be hard and painful. I don't know
 exactly what you're working with but if you want someone to talk to about it
 you can message me.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #186 messages/287 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────
 > <@gabrilend:matrix.org> Soup kitchens are how they get leftists to
 burn out.
 
 Every moment spent feeding the poor is another day we could be organizing.
 
 Soup kitchens aren't bad, the poor need to be fed. But it should be a paid
 position, not a charitable distraction.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #187 messages/303 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────
 Most of my magic is based on communicatuion. Why the fuck doesn't anyone want
 to sit down on a bunch of drugs and attempt to figure out telepathy with me?
 It's literally all I want! Though I can't say it's all I'll ever want. I'm
 sure I'll want more, but like... It's not that hard, conceptually, so... Let's
 just fucking try it please?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #188 fediverse/6029 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────
 spilled water on my keyboard by living with a cat. it might be broken so I'm
 using a spare that my girlfriend lent me. if you're wondering why my password
 sounds different...
                                                           ──────┐
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--- #189 fediverse/4500 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┐
 ┌─────────────────────────────────────┐                                          │
 │ CW: cursing-mentioned-CW-motivation │                                          │
 └─────────────────────────────────────┘                                          │
 I try to always CW for cursing. Every time I do, I imagine it being read aloud   │
 for a blind person while their children sit on their lap and ask "daddy what's   │
 a motherfucker?" "well, that's me, son" and then the kid goes to preschool and   │
 says "My dad fucks my mother!" and they get kicked out so the dad has to take    │
 extra shifts to pay for babysitting and the kid grows up without proper          │
 socialization and the mother becomes an alcoholic and cries herself to sleep     │
 while the dad begins exploring motorcycles and weed and then the kid grows up    │
 to be an incel or whatever                                                       │
 THIS is why CWs are important! Think of the poor regular-looking but kinda       │
 annoying dorks on the internet who self-impose celibacy because they're scared   │
 of emotional connection. The poor dears. I do hope they don't join the           │
 alt-right or whatever as a way of (Ritz this is like, ancient discourse why      │
 are you aping that one Contrapoints video) oh um yeah uh... CWs are important    │
 and I think that's where I'll toot and leave                                     │
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--- #190 fediverse/2816 ---
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 one difference between fantasy and reality is that in fantasy, when you fail,
 you try again.
 
 in reality, when you fail, you are promoted so your boss doesn't have to deal
 with your shit.
 
 in fantasy, when you succeed, you are tasked with greater trials
 
 in reality, when you do well, you are given more of the same.
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--- #191 fediverse/3155 ---
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 │ CW: re: cursing-mentioned │
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 @user-1461 
 
 my issue is that I've never really had project-mates. Every time I try nobody
 will work with me. I applied to like, fifty different jobs, and nobody
 interviewed me! Sheesh, guess they don't want me. FIFTY JOBS. Entry level.
 Beginner programmer.
 
 ah well. I guess they confused someone who would work for 40,000$ per year
 with someone who was 1/3rd as useful as someone who deserved 120,000$ per year.
 
 I'd love to get experience. I'm sure I'd feel significantly differently with
 as much. Perhaps I'd even decide that programming professionally isn't for me,
 which would feel... quite defeating
 
 who can say. Not I, for I have not experienced it. Though I will say my time
 in hardware taught me that I'm fragile and can't work too much. Like a scalpel
 that dulls when used consistently, I am a scalpel that gets no practice... Is
 that really useful at all? who can say. Not I, for I have not experienced it.
 Though I do like writing logical machines. Laying out data. Picturing
 structures.
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--- #192 messages/159 ---
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 Only the good die young, and I'm 29 
 
 It can't be much longer, can it? What do you want from me? Must I prove
 myself, or am I just fated to be as I am?
 
 Every lesson I've learned pales in comparison to the lessons presented to me,
 but still I ponder. I've grown myself into a corner, and now I am empty.
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--- #193 fediverse_boost/5265 ---
◀─[BOOST]
  
  My idea of legacy has always been having children and leaving some books behind so everyone knows what a dork I was.   
                                                                              
  I can't comprehend people like Musk, Rowling, or RFK, Jr. spending the better part of their lives and their obscene wealth just to be giant assholes.  
  
                                                            
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─▶

--- #194 fediverse/3839 ---
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 ┌────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: socialism-recycling-mentioned3 │
 └────────────────────────────────────┘


 "I'm not really a designer, though."
 
 what about that desk you designed?
 
 "oh, yeah I guess that counts. I haven't gotten around to building it though
 so I'm not a real designer."
 
 what! don't say that, you designed it didn't you? How about this - I know this
 girl who wants to be a carpenter but she doesn't have any idea what kind of
 projects to work on. How about I put you two in a room together and she can
 build your desk. If it goes well, I can hook you up with someone who organizes
 designers and he can get you into a furniture design course at the library.
 
 "Hmmmm, well that seems alright. But I don't really want to work with people!
 I mean, I don't know her - what if she doesn't like me?"
 
 oh, she can be a little spicy sometimes, but I'm sure you'll hit it off. Just
 don't mention rats, she had a pet pass away recently and she's still a little
 broken up about it.
 
 "... okay I think I can manage that."
 
 besides, working with people is the best! I do it every day!
 
 "I'll try"
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--- #195 fediverse/677 ---
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 @user-78 
 
 I read about half of this:
 
 https://jo.wtf/6d.html
 
 before I was consumed by the intense urge to prop myself up on a pillow and
 listen to you rant at the ceiling at 4am about gravity or the cosmos or
 whatever you were thinking about prior to speaking your heart
 
 and then I'd write it down, and cherish every moment of it as I shared it with
 my peers and we tried to analyze just what you meant
 
 [sorry for being gay on your timeline]
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--- #196 fediverse/1319 ---
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 I'm a spirit of the forest and stone who wanted to learn how to spell in order
 to make pretty colors and games on computers.
 
 I don't care about your corporatocracy, though I'll learn if it means you'll
 give me food to eat.
 
 ... I'm procrastinating aren't I
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--- #197 messages/1064 ---
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 Stores should store things.
 
 "oh you need a lawnmower? Bring it back when you find another one."
 
 "here's some food for you, and for you, and for you, and for you... Oh we're
 out of that thing, sorry but we have plenty of other things and can help you
 cook them and teach you so you can do it on your own."
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--- #198 fediverse/222 ---
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 │ CW: underwear-mentioned-also-i'm-not-a-fan-of-showers-tbh │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 whenever I take a shower I look like a wet cat for the rest of the day. I feel
 like a wet cat for the rest of 5ever though.
 
 why must I baaaathe! don't you know I'm self cleaning? I change my underwear
 at least twice a day! darn society and their darn proclivities to
 ultra-sensitive noses that somehow pick up on me but somehow fail to notice
 the scent of flowers still in bloom or morning showers gone too soon
 
 not that there's any flowers blooming where I live. that'd just be silly heh
 heh sweats nervously
 
 damn now I have to take ANOTHER SHOWER stupid sweat glands stupid pheromones
 stupid dead skin buildup (sebum I think it's called?) stupid oils that stain
 clothes - AND THAT'S ANOTHER THING who decided that laundry was important
 enough to wear something ONCE and then never again? it's like they expect you
 to wash it or something. ugh I don't have time for that, I need to be weird on
 the internet.
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--- #199 fediverse/4543 ---
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 @user-1698 
 
 Ha that does sound pretty "fun" - I take it you aren't a pianist?
 
 I smell bad because... reasons... so I am always hyper-aware of myself when
 I'm in situations like that. The idea that I might ruin someone's day by being
 there terrifies me.
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--- #200 messages/1151 ---
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 capital C communism is easy. Just pay everyone the same amount, and they can
 swim in the market economy waters as easily as any capitalistic fish, and
 suddenly their incentives are aligned - when one of us selfishly improves our
 lives, we improve the collective as well. When one selflessly improves the
 collective, all of our personal lives are improved. Then, optimize for radical
 abundance, the ability to have whatever you want as soon as ideal, and
 suddenly everything starts working out. P.S. the route to abundance is through
 recycling perfectly. Design your goods to be functional in that way, and you
 have infinite resources that can be used for infinitely many things (until
 they literally wear away to dust)
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