=== ANCHOR POEM === ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────── @user-95 unless it's cake, then you should take a slice out so you can see how it looks on the inside. But like a burger, or a loaf of bread? TEAR IT WITH YOUR TEETH show me your ferocity and hunger ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────┘ === SIMILARITY RANKED === --- #1 fediverse/3625 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────── ┌──────────────────────┐ │ CW: food-mentioned │ └──────────────────────┘ "special sauce" is just dorito gogurt. Maybe with some garlic added in. just because you phrase it in a weird way doesn't make it less delicious on a burger ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘ --- #2 fediverse/2286 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────── ┌──────────────────────────┐ │ CW: uspol-food-mentioned │ └──────────────────────────┘ ... dangit, these sandwiches are getting kinda gross. Guess I'm gonna have to eat them myself, which, uh... idk what I expected xD sometimes you just have all this energy, right? and you don't know what to do with it, so... sandwiches. And hey, sandwiches are cool, they're a pretty neat anti-hunger tool! but uhhhh idk if I really want to eat six whole sandwiches myself. I'm gonna do it though hehe wish me luck [ding] ah nuts my rice and beans are done, hang on lemme eat those first [passes out from exhaustion] exhaustion can be cured with a nap exertion can be cured with water and a few rest days trauma can be allayed for at least a few days with soul food and compassion. maybe laughter too, depending on the mood. fear can be bolstered with a smile, a wink, and a courageous act, and loss is just change you didn't consent to. they won't consent too, so let's give them some change to tolerate. [internally salivating over all the piles of weaponry that I envision them surrendering] ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘ --- #3 fediverse/5818 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────── all you can eat sushi places where they bring you a little of whatever the shef had been making ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────┘ --- #4 fediverse/4856 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────── there are so many chickens in the universe. if you're gonna eat meat, eat chicken instead of fish. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────┘ --- #5 fediverse/3691 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────── ┌──────────────────────┐ │ CW: food-mentioned │ └──────────────────────┘ I had a dream that someone fed me a McDonalds burger in the airport (with "special sauce") and then the next time I was at the grocery store in the waking world I ended up buying a bunch of those meat replacements that I usually skip in favor of moar vegetables. Hmmmmm.... I wonder if I have a deficiency (yeah you dumbass it's a calorie deficiency, just eat more) ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘ --- #6 fediverse/3925 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────── most people, when they run out of toothpaste: "oh huh I should buy more" me, when I run out of toothpaste: "verily in three monthes time, when I shall next possess toothpaste, I shall forsoothe brush TWICE as hard and TWICE as often, to make up for the holes inflicted upon my teeth. Innest addittioneth, no more candy shallest be eateneth untileth ye toothpasteth be acquiredeth" ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┘ --- #7 fediverse/3650 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────── anything with layers is an open-faced sandwich or a pizza in disguise rawr ex dee ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘ --- #8 fediverse/3194 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────── @user-1218 emotional labor is labor rest when you're tired. eat when you're hungry. drink when you're thirsty, and laugh when it bubbles up within you. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘ --- #9 fediverse/2882 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────── ┌───────────────────────┐ │ CW: disordered-eating │ └───────────────────────┘ in regards to my food habits, PLEASE do as I say, not as I do. for your own sake. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘ --- #10 messages/504 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────── "special sauce" is just dorito gogurt. Maybe with some garlic added in. *just because you phrase it in a weird way doesn't make it less delicious on a burger* ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘ --- #11 fediverse/5834 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────── would you feet a cat at your door? how about a crow? would you water a dying plant? (don't, they get waterlogged if the soil is already moist) what if a dear what if dear food what if bear what if bear food what if dogpack what if dogpackfoodtearchompbitepullsavor I'd feeeed my self but dollars and errands are hard : ( ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────┘ --- #12 fediverse/2288 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────── ... zzz ZZZ zzz ... I gotta lotta things to eat, but I'm so tired and kinda dirty. Maybe a shower first. TTYL ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘ --- #13 fediverse/2260 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────── ┌──────────────────────┐ │ CW: food-mentioned │ └──────────────────────┘ cookies or cheetos for dinner is better than nothing for dinner, but please eat your vegetables when you can. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘ --- #14 messages/309 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────── sometimes I'll accidentally get food on my hands and think "oh gross is this why humans like to have napkins handy when eating?" ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘ --- #15 fediverse/223 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────── ┌────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: that-universal-human-feeling-when-(food-mentioned) │ └────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ you look at the food you're halfway done eating to see if there's something wrong with it ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #16 fediverse/3204 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────── @user-591 if you give me your address I'll buy you a pizza or even just give me a pizza place and I'll buy a pizza for pickup or tell them "next person who calls and says "banana bicycle balloon bulldozer" will tell you the address to deliver it to" ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘ --- #17 fediverse/552 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────── ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: unnecessarily-combative-sorry-smiley-face-silly │ └─────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ @user-398 you take that back you feckin goof Mickey is king for a reason I will DIE on this hill (jk sorry for being combative but I'd just like to say that I'm someone who likes him unironically in essentially every incarnation) ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #18 fediverse/2480 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────── so what if people want to sit on the couch eating cheetos? they're more than capable of something far greater, but of course they are allowed to spend as they like their life. their ONLY life. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘ --- #19 fediverse/1175 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────── I count 8 pickle jars in my fridge, of which about half have at least one pickle. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘ --- #20 fediverse/1414 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────── ┌────────────────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: cursed-strange-weird-gardening-tip │ └────────────────────────────────────────┘ they say that slugs don't like salt because they turn into pickles of course that's not true, cucumbers turn into slugs when fed a diet of leaves and cucumbers ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘ |