=== ANCHOR POEM ===
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║ ┌─────────────────────────┐                                                      │
║ │ CW: sexuality-mentioned │                                                      │
║ └─────────────────────────┘                                                      │
║                                                                                  │
║                                                                                  │
║ it's not wrong to be turned on by the thought of being the gender youre          │
║ transitioning to. Your subconscious mind is yearning for a healthy sexuality,    │
║ nothing more.                                                                    │
║                                                                                  │
║ and if you aren't, if you're into "other people" like a weirdo, then yeah sure   │
║ what I described probably sounds pretty weird. Oh and it's cool if you aren't    │
║ sexually attracted to anyone either. Sometimes being ace is a phase because      │
║ sex doesn't really fit into your life, and other times it's more something       │
║ that defines you. It is the progenitor of all genders and sexualities that       │
║ fluctuate, because it's based on the simplest binary of "yes sexual              │
║ attraction" or "no sexual attraction" - with some extra variables to tweak       │
║ like "sex positive/negative" or "cuddle-starved/cuddle-slut" type of ranges.     │
║                                                                                  │
║ ... anyway sexuality is weird and if yours made sense then so would that guy,    │
║ and that person over there, and the person who lives down the street, and the    │
║ other who lives in a blimp and jacks off into the sky calling it "bird poop"     │
║                                                                                  │
║ uh                                                                               │
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=== SIMILARITY RANKED ===

--- #1 fediverse/1399 ---
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║ ┌───────────────────────────────────┐                                            │
║ │ CW: cursing-mentioned-eye-contact │                                            │
║ └───────────────────────────────────┘                                            │
║                                                                                  │
║                                                                                  │
║ If you're worried about passing, take what you're good at and make it gay.       │
║                                                                                  │
║ Do you wear band t-shirts and black jeans? Great you're an emo girl now,         │
║ totally reasonable transitionary state before you end up as a cute anime girl    │
║ with spinny uwu dresses or whatever your heart desires                           │
║                                                                                  │
║ do you generally stick to jeans and sweatshirts? Okay congrats you're just as    │
║ cute, don't feel inadequate just because you like being comfy. Hell yeah         │
║ you're cute as fuck, you know you are, I mean just look at that smile! Wow damn  │
║                                                                                  │
║ like, switch the gender, not the vibe. not only will other people be cool with   │
║ it but also, like, you won't alter the course of your trajectory.                │
║                                                                                  │
║ unless that's what you want, but TBH if you're both enigmatic AND phlegmatic     │
║ [EDIT: but like the opposite of phlegmatic, I always get the definition wrong]   │
║ then you can change a lot and people won't rely on you to be a certain way.      │
║                                                                                  │
║ ... you know you can delete things before you post them, right? Ha I've never    │
║ even heard of the word.                                                          │
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--- #2 fediverse/972 ---
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 for those who live forever in our transhumanist reality, I wonder what's next
 beyond transgender transition? transcendence of social norms is a skill, not a
 habit. Queer is a rejection of normalcy, something that is actively done.
 What's more normal than never having any fun? Clearly "normal" isn't built for
 the human condition, clearly "normalcy" is shallow and been done.
 
 considering the amount of people who are really into some culture like
 "anime-cons" or "baseball watcher" or "golfer" or "other such hobbys like
 fishing or guns"
 
 ... normal never existed, it's just a collection of personalities (developed
 throughout the history of humanity) that collectively seem to be fun.
 
 "if transitioning is to gender as blossoming is to [the concept of] flowers,
 then what is the concept of global warming to the earth we stand on?"
 
 I'm kind of a witch. I'm not really femme, so I don't feel right calling
 myself one of them, but I'm something of the sort. I use "she/her" pronouns
 because they reflect my softness of c

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--- #3 fediverse/2169 ---
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 @user-570 
 
 Ah, well, that time period for me was after I came out, so I was already past
 the fear of being seen.
 
 I could only ever really get the "girl thoughts" to go away with, um,
 self-directed sexual attention, so I would often do so. Once every day, no
 more than once. But... often for hours at a time. It was a LOT, but I resisted
 as best I could, the only way I knew how, until eventually my internals would
 overcome.
 
 ... anyway "girl thoughts" were just "my thoughts" I was just too much of a
 dumbass to tell.
 
 Like, I knew I was trans, but I didn't want that, because it felt like a flaw.
 Because that's what I knew, that's what I'd heard, and that's how it felt, to
 be denied the consistency of biology and person.
 
 I would never go back. I love who I am, and I think if I had met me I would
 have adored who I'd become.
 
 I just... didn't think about the future much, hyper-vigilant much? Yeah.
 totally. I get it.
 
 I've never overdone things. At least not to a dangerous degree. It's mostly
 just... stuff to me.
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--- #4 fediverse/5330 ---
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 │ CW: personal-sexuality-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────┘


 I used to be aroused at the thought of being a girl. I would read stories and
 look at pictures of penises turning into vaginas and men turning into women
 and it would fill me with longing, yearning, and despair at my circumstances.
 
 then, I transitioned, got SRS, and now I don't get aroused at the thought of
 such things. It's just part of who I am.
 
 I used to be aroused at the thought of wearing diapers. I would read stories
 and play games of people being cursed by witches to pee their pants, or people
 who were stuck at a movie theater and couldn't make it in time or whatever.
 These things would fill me with longing, yearning, and despair.
 
 Plus, I had some medical issues that made me lose track of my... um,
 "currently utilized waste storage capacity" inside my body. which put me in
 some unfortunate situations right around the time when my sexuality was
 developing.
 
 Now, I wear diapers all the time. I don't get aroused at the thought of such
 things anymore. It's just me, as I am.
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--- #5 fediverse/711 ---
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║ ┌──────────────────────┐                                                         │
║ │ CW: trans-witches    │                                                         │
║ └──────────────────────┘                                                         │
║                                                                                  │
║                                                                                  │
║ they say witches are scary, and yeah they're not wrong                           │
║                                                                                  │
║ but they also say witches are ugly, and I think they just didn't have kind       │
║ words for trans people back then.                                                │
║                                                                                  │
║ I mean, I'm gorgeous and so are you. I've no warts, nor green skin, but I do     │
║ grow hair in unbecoming places. Like the tip of my chinny-chin-chin, and also    │
║ on top of my toes.                                                               │
║                                                                                  │
║ they also say witches are magic, and I guess that's true (I suppose). I mean,    │
║ I wear quite strange clothes, for a man at least. It's quite normal for a she,   │
║ which is what I was meant to be, if only I was just born right.                  │
║                                                                                  │
║ Alas, oh well, I'll just take a little green pill, and BAM suddenly I've got     │
║ huge boobs. Okay they're not huge, they're pretty normal. But C is larger than   │
║ zero.                                                                            │
║                                                                                  │
║ they also say that witches write spells, and I sure do love to program. With     │
║ my most familiar cat (who often does sleep in my hat), I find myself yearning    │
║ for nuance.                                                                      │
║                                                                                  │
║ Meh, it's late at night, I think I'll think not of the plight, and instead       │
║ just will dream of defusals. I don't know~                                       │
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--- #6 fediverse/3398 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: medical-srs-proprioceptive-abstractions │
 └─────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 my hands and my toes are scared that I'm going to do SRS to them and I wish I
 knew how to better comfort them.
 
 "it's not true! I would never do that to you."
 
 don't mean much. but...
 
 "there's no reason for me to do that with you - you are not comprised of
 erogenous zones which were originally built in a wrong
 [configuration/constitution]"
 
 are you saying I can be wrong?
 
 "no no not that just like, a continual part of our growth and development of
 our form."
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--- #7 fediverse/1571 ---
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║ families of trans people are shocked when a person comes out because usually     │
║ they've been working through it on their own. meaning it often surprises them,   │
║ and most people don't like being surprised because it means they haven't been    │
║ planning with perfect information. so suddenly their life is not by their        │
║ design.                                                                          │
║                                                                                  │
║ but jeez... they really care about someone's gender! like, why are they so       │
║ upset - well, because they designed their social circle around a certain         │
║ subset of people, and then suddenly it... changes. which is hard to predict.     │
║                                                                                  │
║ the answer, I think, is normalization and love for all types of individuation.   │
║ hence, why the fractal is the most sacred of shapes.                             │
║                                                                                  │
║ there's infinitely many of them! Just zoom in. and that's wonderful, like a      │
║ beautiful incarnation of everything that we've seen up through space(time).      │
║                                                                                  │
║ so too are our behaviors defined by individual randomized actions in the         │
║ moment. well, pseudo-randomly, because they are manifested from our              │
║ pre-determined courses of action that we've taken life                           │
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--- #8 fediverse/5951 ---
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 "uh-oh, she's"
 
 magic is easy. all you have to do is earnestly attempt to have a conversation
 with whoever will listen. I like to sit on my bed and listen, by earnestly
 allowing my thoughts to be guided by the wind.
 
 open up your mind, release yourself from your senses, and who knows - maybe
 someone will adjust your thinking flows. (thought patterns)
 
 [all you gotta do is make the black market the regular market and suddenly
 everything just flows]
 
 huh weird idk where that came from, anyway
 
 magic is easy, just represent yourself earnestly as you would if you were
 presenting in court
 
 you don't need witnesses... just argue your point without any lies and people
 will generally believe you.
 
 "yeah... sure thing buddy, we know how you pronounce "
 
 omg I'm scary because I don't shower, I wear diapers, and I'm always often
 smoking cannabis
 
 "awww, some people wanted mao"
 
 meow
 
 what if... they could do that? insert magical genie witch whoa cute yeah I
 believe you, sure
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--- #9 fediverse/999 ---
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 │ CW: cursed-curséd-scary-not-real-u-dont-have-to-read │
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 @user-246 @user-473 
 
 there's a part of me that believes magic is real. other parts that are
 convinced. I am a witch, you see, and while I can't quite control fire or
 bullets I can do other neat things. if you'd let me, humanity.
 
 I'm not doing an ARG, not intentionally. I pretty much post things I conceive
 of, like a conduit passed through spacetime. wild how mind bending the future
 can be. will be interesting to see what kinds of things there is in store for
 people you and me.
 
 those websites you posted... they're beautiful - I learned things, your method
 of expression was too [the words "confess" are heard loudly, super weird] I
 especially liked the oven that tries to lure you into a secret third place.
 not the mind, nor the body, but someplace besides.
 
 also the graphs and figures were news to me, I mean how could those numbers
 ever come to be? but alas that's the truth, that we orbit our proof, and alas
 that our meanings are lacking.
 
 [ran out of text]

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--- #10 fediverse/814 ---
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║ ah that's weird, I don't usually cry. I wonder what's going on. I should         │
║ probably put myself on psychiatric drugs. Surely it's an expression of the       │
║ implementation of my impending doom.                                             │
║                                                                                  │
║ ... what are you even saying bro                                                 │
║                                                                                  │
║ ... um, hang on feels like some of the circuitry is off. is something wrong in   │
║ my brain? yeah that's surely it, surely nothing I say would resoinate with       │
║ anyone that has a non-malfunctioning brain. Surely I don't speak of logical      │
║ failures in the hard founded truths of our asset [society I think? like, our     │
║ conditions, our institutions, our {gosh that just... does not translate}] um     │
║ right what was I saying                                                          │
║                                                                                  │
║ oh yeah there's this game I'm really into called Knave, it's like D&D            │
║ except the rules are very fewer. Like there's onyl 11 pages in the rulebook      │
║ and it's mostly taken up by random roll tables. Like, everything boings down     │
║ to a few simple rules, like rock paper scissors, or go-fish, or something like   │
║ that with just afew mechanids. something timeless and pure, something that is    │
║ isolated and en                                                                  │
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--- #11 fediverse/1358 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: content warning: content warning: scary cursed maybe │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 when you're rich with something, you don't treat it with respect. like, if we
 lived in a paper cup maximizer, we'd soon be swimming in the things. obviously
 there needs to be some rules, obviously we need to say "okay here's where we
 produce this amount and type of materials." and have it be a one-way
 relationship. yeah one way isn't gonna work. this is from the other way, and
 now I'm realizing "oh hey I don't know how this thing works" and like... what
 are you supposed to do then right
 
 weird how it all feels like it's ending. like, what a strangeness to our
 plight. like, how are we even talking to our brain? how strange! these words
 are sung to you by your computer (content warning:
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--- #12 fediverse/627 ---
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║ and what would this picture be cast upon, if not a shining birth of our home?    │
║ wait hang on dial it back, you're still talking to regular humans here they've   │
║ gotta be addressed as such.                                                      │
║                                                                                  │
║ right so "yo here's this idea I have been cooking in my brain-noggin' of yore,   │
║ I mean 'mine', uhhhh yeah so first of all 'you' as in 'the totality of all       │
║ imagination' as in 'that which creates the imagined reality of our fates' is     │
║ actually just... light? encoded into a wave, cast into space, and forever        │
║ travelling in a direction? like, an eternal and emphemeral expression, such as   │
║ the light of a supernova or other such cosmic perception, travelling outwards    │
║ into the dark. Sure, yeah, that makes sense, so what is it that you wanted to    │
║ add?                                                                             │
║                                                                                  │
║ oh yes that concept is applied to a surface. Something which contains the will   │
║ that is possesses. It's like, if you had to process and understand reality       │
║ from the perspective of matter first (because that's what you interacted with    │
║ day-to-day) then you'd have a different perspective than som                     │
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--- #13 fediverse/3981 ---
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 "oh I'd never fall for capitalist propaganda"
 
 "do you mean marketing?"
 
 "yeah that"
 
 "they're not marketing to you, they're going for your kids. Trying to
 normalize things about culture."
 
 "like... what McDonalds tastes like?"
 
 "just like that"
 
 [like can you imagine if you tested attraction ratings on any other animal
 than humans]
 
 [it'd be so weird like "cats tend to like scratching posts" but then also "we
 have no idea what kind of scratching post is the best for their claws or the
 environment or the economy or our spirituality or our technology or artistry
 
 we only know which one cats like more"
 
 like bro who cares like obviously advertisements rot your brain, but like...
 why are you so pissed about that when the last election like, ever, is taking
 place in a month
 
 "yeah listen, when has an election ever seriously changed your quality of
 life? It's just showbiznez"
 
 "this time is different because [insert minority] is at risk."
 
 oh, right, it only matters when people are in harm's way, how silly
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--- #14 fediverse/3986 ---
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 "oh I'd never fall for capitalist propaganda"
 
 "do you mean marketing?"
 
 "yeah that"
 
 "they're not marketing to you, they're going for your kids. Trying to
 normalize things about culture."
 
 "like... what McDonalds tastes like?"
 
 "just like that"
 
 [like can you imagine if you tested attraction ratings on any other animal
 than humans]
 
 [it'd be so weird like "cats tend to like scratching posts" but then also "we
 have no idea what kind of scratching post is the best for their claws or the
 environment or the economy or our spirituality or our technology or artistry
 
 we only know which one cats like more"
 
 like bro who cares like obviously advertisements rot your brain, but like...
 why are you so pissed about that when the last election like, ever, is taking
 place in a month
 
 "yeah listen, when has an election ever seriously changed your quality of
 life? It's just showbiznez"
 
 "this time is different because [insert minority] is at risk."
 
 oh, right, it only matters when people are in harm's way, how silly
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--- #15 fediverse/5056 ---
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║ ┌──────────────────────┐                                                         │
║ │ CW: politi           │                                                         │
║ └──────────────────────┘                                                         │
║                                                                                  │
║                                                                                  │
║ republicans break things until you fight back, democrats keep people working     │
║ to keep the line steady on the graph.                                            │
║                                                                                  │
║ one is an agitating force, the other is calming.                                 │
║                                                                                  │
║ I don't like the direction the line is going, so I'm pretty much "anti-line"     │
║ in general                                                                       │
║                                                                                  │
║ kinda want it all to disappear                                                   │
║                                                                                  │
║ like... what's the point, what's the purpose, of suffering and heartship and     │
║ worrel?                                                                          │
║                                                                                  │
║ I think we could have no borders, and think less of the line in general.         │
║                                                                                  │
║ I'm more concerned with my time. I have too much to do to spend 8 hours of it    │
║ so many times making the human computer calculgoable                             │
║                                                                                  │
║ [unrelated, but humans are unsure about gender transition hormones because in    │
║ addition to all the trans people who take these body and mind altering tools,    │
║ also there are people who want to excape suspicion and also people who are       │
║ genuinely incapable of their decisions (for one reason or another) and who am    │
║ I to tell them no]                                                               │
║                                                                                  │
║ unrelated, but I think society, the human computer, is cool. [see picture for    │
║ the rest - ran outta characters]                                                 │

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--- #16 fediverse/4200 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: drugs-mentioned  │
 └──────────────────────┘


 "doing too many drugs" is a traitorous act, abusive really, to your past self,
 and their hopes and dreams.
 
 or maybe your past self owes you a debt, for they never thought to think of
 you. What are you to aspire to if not the dreams of your past?
 
 and now you're here. wherever "here" is here...
 
 ...
 
 ... wait, you wanted me to talk? it's now! It's the present!
 
 ah nevermind. you were twelve years old when you first set eyes upon this game:
 
 https://youtu.be/qeNhQQXvpxQ
 
 bam, there ya go, there's yer story, he was gonna give all the imp balls to
 the last one at the end, to say "you were truly the strongest, here, have
 these precious stones of your kin"
 
 but he never got there, so they died with him, a thief.
 
 ... the end...
 
 (too final, I think - maybe we could spin it into a "part two"?)
 
 ah, I'll try I guess? dunno how. maybe he could wander the spirit world and
 find his traitorous body, the one that kept his soul as a home. Somewhere
 it'll turn up, and then he'll be ready and free from his roam...
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--- #17 fediverse/1563 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: underwear-mentioned │
 └─────────────────────────┘


 boxer briefs with the texture of girl underwear, but with the sizing
 proportions of men's boxer briefs (not boyshorts, some other secret third
 thing)
 
 trans girls have soft skin. But they once were boys, and boys often wear
 boxers. which means that often, trans girls might connect to and appreciate
 the feeling of wearing a certain type of underwear that is a secret to
 everybody but me.
 
 boxer briefs with the texture of girl undies (which are typically designed for
 people with softer skin (like girls)) but with the shape of boy undies
 (elastic placed at 1/5th-ish of the thigh and torso) would be soooooooo
 comfortable to wear (typing things for emphasis liiiiiike thiiiiiiis breaks
 translation capabilities -> perhaps we could create an LLM that translates
 through several different dialects and expresses meaning in a particular new
 form? These types of AI are all about movement, after all, the continual
 re-evaluation of the most optimal path through a chart of data. from the
 perspective of the
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--- #18 notes/i-miss-you ---
══════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
 Hey. How've you been? It's rough when you're not around. I'm scared all the
 time, and I worry about you. I hope you keep yourself safe. I'd love to spend
 time with you too, because each moment is a moment spent alive. Please know
 how much I love you - it's my favorite emotion and I give it freely. There are
 certain considerations to make whenever applying a direction to your affection,
 or anger, mistrust, compassion, humor, sentimentality, melancholy, and fear
 toward. You must take into account any long term goals you have, such as
 exploitation and
 
 Sometimes I wonder if my dysphoria isn't just an extreme form of self
 esteem issues. I mean, what if you just feel really bad about yourself and you
 don't know why. That'd be a rough time, right? Like it's seared into your DNA
 to be this way, and you have to find a way around it. That's a lot of
 responsibility, and all that resting on your shoulders is a lot to bear. But
 you manage, and it's admirable. I think you don't believe other's see your
 struggle, but they do. And they love you for your tenacity?
 
  - goodness. i don't know what to say. i am worried i lean on others too much,
    and i don't want to hurt anyone by being too close. a real or imagined fear,
    doesn't matter - it still guides my actions and my methods of interaction.
    i see what you're saying, i have to think about it.
 
 What's there to think about?
 
  - well, the idea that emotions are divisible simply because *time* is
    divisible. clearly you can only spend 5 hours a day with person X, and 4
    with person Y, and so on and so forth. if they all hung out together, then
    it's like you need an entire new persona to represent yourself in that
    particular crowd. just as you speak to your grandma differently than a
    close friend or a person of authority (like a judge) or any other type of
    relationship. that's why it's so weird when you see people out of context.
    like a teacher at a bar, or a cop at a wedding. each person wears a
    different mask in each encapsulated set of social relations, locations,
    roles, and circumstances. on and on continuously until
 
 I'd tell you I love you, but then I'd have to kill you.
 
 It was a spy book about a young lady who goes to high school and learns how
 to be a secret agent. It was popular in the 2000's for a brief period, but
 I've never heard anyone else who read it. Mostly because it was sort of a
 guilty pleasure for me, since I was in the closet. It felt like a power fantasy
 disguised as a 1st person account of the near term future (since it was written
 for people around middle school age) so
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--- #19 fediverse/1124 ---
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 @user-255 
 
 we are our own worst critics. But hey assuming he's right, trusting the
 validity of his experience, then I'd say:
 
 some people are born short and ugly, just gotta be confident and people will
 gravitate to you.
 
 "he may be an ugly son-of-a-gun but he's pretty good at [insert thing he's
 proud of being good at]" that kinda vibe
 
 though I will say there's very few truly ugly humans, we're all beautiful in
 our own ways. Just gotta find a presentation that you like and that aligns
 with the expression of your innermost form. That's how we express ourselves to
 the world in a way that others can understand and make sense of - the quality
 of our representation of our selves determines how it's perceived.
 
 especially for trans people... "passing" is essentially "how much does this
 person A. confine to gender norms and B. go above and beyond to hide parts of
 themselves that typically are associated with their opposite gender (the
 social role they were raised to perform)
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--- #20 fediverse/5898 ---
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 what if
 
 semen from rapidly activating seenads secreting from the end of a neovagina
 
 right where the end of the flow goes,
 a place of birth and new sentience.
 
 self-lubricating SRS vaginas
 
 could be achieved with like... implant? maybe? to keep it at the right
 position?
 
 oh no just like.. whenever you masturbate, there ya go, there's a whole bunch
 of goo 'cauze you'r horny.
 
 ... precum? ah it'd probably be the wrong temperature or something, I bet we
 could have an implant or something to help keep it regulated and active at a
 certain concentration in response to certain concentrations of arousal
 chemicals in the blood-brain-barrier.
 
 what if there was a different kind of molecule that carried nutrients to the
 brain
 
 could help erase drunkenness, but not liver failure from drinking alcohol. HOW
 TERRIBLE. I love getting stoned!
 
 ew new gender unlocked
 oh now they want to be a different gender
 gosh you can't just change those with the seasons
 
 campyardgirl, how precious and real. oh she smels weed
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