=== ANCHOR POEM ===
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"but what about their legitimate grievances"
uh hello I'd like a number 5, a number 9, extra pickles, some fresh human
blood supplied by the guy behind the counter with the pretty green eyes, a
number 2, make it a combo, some fresh icicle drippings even though it hasn't
snowed since last year (RIP winter), a side of fries, and a diet coke. Large.
Actually make it two diet cokes. Yep, both large. Alright see you in a sec.
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=== SIMILARITY RANKED ===
--- #1 fediverse/5201 ---
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@user-192
is okay, girl
time will be richer sooner
don't poop your pants just yet
remember, good is just a shade of gray away from silver which you can use to
line your pockets with tinfoil hats
beep boop computer touchers anonymous called they said they want their secret
handshake back
if you wanna diss your associates go ahead but I sure as heck love my rad-ical
com-patriots just as much as I love my ice-cream salad friend witches
... whoops there I go being insane again, hope you feel better friend
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--- #2 fediverse/2286 ---
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│ CW: uspol-food-mentioned │
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... dangit, these sandwiches are getting kinda gross. Guess I'm gonna have to
eat them myself, which, uh... idk what I expected xD
sometimes you just have all this energy, right? and you don't know what to do
with it, so... sandwiches. And hey, sandwiches are cool, they're a pretty neat
anti-hunger tool! but uhhhh idk if I really want to eat six whole sandwiches
myself. I'm gonna do it though hehe wish me luck [ding] ah nuts my rice and
beans are done, hang on lemme eat those first
[passes out from exhaustion]
exhaustion can be cured with a nap
exertion can be cured with water and a few rest days
trauma can be allayed for at least a few days with soul food and compassion.
maybe laughter too, depending on the mood.
fear can be bolstered with a smile, a wink, and a courageous act,
and loss is just change you didn't consent to.
they won't consent too, so let's give them some change to tolerate.
[internally salivating over all the piles of weaponry that I envision them
surrendering]
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--- #3 fediverse/2843 ---
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│ CW: re: yelling-scary │
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@user-1074 @user-1209
"we still have slaves, we just enslave mexicans instead of blacks."
"don't forget all the offshored jobs, those too"
"oh yeah and all our stuff is made by slaves in the far east"
"yeah but like fuck them right who cares they're so far away"
"yeah bro totes"
"anyway what do you want for dinner bro"
"i dunno bro I had chinese last night"
"cool cool so mexican then? I know this great paraguanese place"
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--- #4 fediverse/2480 ---
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so what if people want to sit on the couch eating cheetos? they're more than
capable of something far greater, but of course they are allowed to spend as
they like their life.
their ONLY life.
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--- #5 fediverse/462 ---
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I don't care about capitalism. You know what's more interesting than bringing
value to shareholders?
How I'm going to clean this floor that I drunkenly spilled beer upon with only
2 paper towels and 0.1ml of bleach.
How I'm going to feed the 36 people who are coming to this social event
tomorrow that I've only sorta planned for and that I have enough groceries
for, but am not quite sure how to cook everything in a way that is delicious
and accessible.
how I'm going to climb this mountain on only 2 eggs and a tiny bowl of
hashbrowns even though I promised my friend I'd be strong and that we'd reach
the top because that way we'd be able to
============= stack overflow =====
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--- #6 fediverse/5092 ---
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"you know what this dish needs? some ramen noodle seasoning. Hang on, I think
I got some in my junk drawer."
said nobody ever
everyone knows there isn't just ONE junk drawer, but several hundred. They
multiply in the middle of the night, but it's by such a small constant factor
(0.015 ish according to our top scientists) that you don't notice until it
"flips the bit" and hits the new landmark which marks the miles since you got
stoned.
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--- #7 fediverse/5142 ---
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"you know what this dish needs? some ramen noodle seasoning. Hang on, I think
I got some in my junk drawer."
said nobody ever
everyone knows there isn't just ONE junk drawer, but several hundred. They
multiply in the middle of the night, but it's by such a small constant factor
(0.015 ish according to our top scientists) that you don't notice until it
"flips the bit" and hits the new landmark which marks the miles since you got
stoned.
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--- #8 fediverse/1414 ---
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│ CW: cursed-strange-weird-gardening-tip │
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they say that slugs don't like salt because they turn into pickles
of course that's not true, cucumbers turn into slugs when fed a diet of leaves
and cucumbers
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--- #9 fediverse/3117 ---
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│ CW: cursed-uspol │
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hey. wanna know what would be really cursed?
--
if trump dropped out and musk took his place
--
good thing it'll never happen because those dinguses can't accept defeat and
will never tactically retreat
--
maybe something to keep in mind for 4 years from now. eyes on the prize for
now means our eyes aren't to our flanks.
what else could they do that would come out of left field?
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--- #10 fediverse/892 ---
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@user-622
ah but a noble house would have armed guards who would drag you kicking and
screaming out onto the cold winter night the moment you offended m'lordship
frankly I could do with a good drag-and-kicking myself, where have all the
good men-at-arms gone T.T
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--- #11 fediverse/1617 ---
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daydreaming about a gang of tough guys who goes around knocking down the
internal fence walls in suburbia and throwing potlucks for all the neighbors
for a month or two so they have social opportunities to meet each other and
make friends
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--- #12 fediverse/3961 ---
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│ CW: witcherie │
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Well, I failed the mandate of heaven last year, and I failed the trial of the
hero this summer, what's next? I'll do my best at those as well, so the next
person has an easier time of it.
unrelated, but today I saw a bald eagle outside my apartment. Well, I'm not
sure if it was bald but it "KREEEEEE"'d like they do. Plus it had a white head
and a yellow beak, but I'm not an ornithologist so idk. It perched on a tree
that I could spy on from my hammock through my binoculars, and I swear it was
eye-ing my fat juicy cat through the bars of my porch's railing. They have
excellent vision.
Might be related, we'll see.
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--- #13 messages/1488 ---
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"what are you doing?" doxxing myself. If she wanted to save as many lives as
possible, she'd do it in a shed. She's been tricked into doing it for the
money by people who don't want to die in a warehouse. That's valid, but they
aren't giving her money anyway.
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--- #14 fediverse/612 ---
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Look all I'm saying is if I had an acolyte or two then my insane ramblings
could be filtered and parsed by a real actual human instead of being copied
wholesale onto the internet, where the inconsequential or inconceivable ones
are left to rest alongside the gifts of knowledge from another realm.
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--- #15 fediverse/3491 ---
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│ CW: politics-mentioned │
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@user-620
"hey I have an idea let's poke a wounded animal with sharp teeth until it
feels like it's backed into a corner because it's been spending the past
couple years ruminating and telling itself that we want to kill it and it's
children"
it doesn't matter what the truth is - they believe what they want.
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--- #16 fediverse/4554 ---
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│ CW: political-violence-mentioned │
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can't fucking wait till we're done eating the rich and I can go back to a
simple life of playing with my cat, making video games, writing poetry (bad
poetry, but I like it) and hanging out with my friends.
gotta build the social infrastructure to get through this phase first, though.
something something echo chambers exist IRL too
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--- #17 fediverse/1764 ---
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Okay okay hear me out - but what if instead of pumping oil out of the ground,
we shoved a bunch of tree trunks down there and let them marinate for a few
thousand years
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--- #18 fediverse/2089 ---
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║ "ah nuts, the crows are back. Better give them some diced-up carrots so they │
║ shut up." │
║ │
║ BAD, this teaches them to "sing" for attention which is annoying af │
║ │
║ "Hmmm, this carrot looks kinda withered. I'm going to dice it up to throw to │
║ the birds because it's better than rotting in a dump" │
║ │
║ BETTER, because you're being sustainable and nourishing local wildlife, │
║ │
║ "That songbird is beautiful! And that squirrel is building a nest. I'm going │
║ to throw some of this pre-diced carrot that I keep in an air-tight container │
║ on my porch to them so they feel rewarded for doing things that I want" │
║ │
║ EVEN BETTER, but requires more effort and forethought │
║ │
║ [noooo didn't you read ranger rick as a kid you're not supposed to feed the │
║ wildlife because it'll teach them to trust humans in a world where humans can │
║ be total assholes to them and also we don't want them hanging out in cities │
║ because they might get run over or whatever] │
║ │
║ listen, they're gonna live where they can find food. And if they can't find it │
║ in the woods, they'll liv │
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--- #19 fediverse/549 ---
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│ CW: pol-socialism │
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ngl I kinda want to see what conservatives would riot over in a socialist
system. Like "oh no we have healthcare! that sucks, so I'm going to burn down
a police station" like bro what your basic needs are met and you're encouraged
and enabled to pursue your passions and personal desires, are you still hung
up on that old capitalist stuff? get a life my guy that's soOoOoOo 21st
century of you
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--- #20 fediverse/1151 ---
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│ CW: military-weapon-from-dream-for-suburbia-cursed-war-guns-ummmm-idk-what-else │
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saw this thing for 2 seconds in my dream last night. It's kinda cursed. I
think the tank blew me up with a machine gun?
the remaining ~10 minutes of the dream was pretty neat though. I was a secret
agent for a bit, I got in a knife fight (which I won because I had killer
instinct and the other guy just knew how to stab) and afterwards I retired in
a socialist commune in a log cabin full of sunlight and warmth somewhere in
the mountains in the forest. I was alone with others, like the hobbits after
LotR.
Also an old lady tricked me which was not nice, I was very polite with her but
apparently "ma'am there's been a safety incident, I need to get you to a safe
place" is not the kind thing to say to the person distracting you. >.>
Also, "but we like you!" is not an excuse, the military does not care if you
like them or not, if you're part of the modern bourgeoisie you are causing
harm to the country. We don't look fondly on slavers.
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