=== ANCHOR POEM ===
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 The trick is, if you *think* you're schizophrenic, then you will be. If you
 *think* you're telepathic, then you will be.
 
 There are no grand narratives. Just live your life as you will and be content
 with what you build for yourself.
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=== SIMILARITY RANKED ===

--- #1 fediverse/441 ---
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 @user-328 
 
 don't trust anything on the internet. It can be taken from you.
 
 don't trust anyone in your life - if you are alone, which you can verify
 through the sense of connection you feel to others - if you are alone, how can
 you trust anyone that they've provided for you to interact with?
 
 when's the last time you drove to a random city in your country and tried to
 make friends with passerby? Would you even be convinced that they'd be aligned
 to their own designs, and not to that which "they" assigned?
 
 do note that I'm schizophrenic, probably, according to nobody but me, so...
 take what I say as you will
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--- #2 fediverse/3451 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: mental-health-mentioned │
 └─────────────────────────────┘


 dear ritz: you should stop talking until your new psychiatric meds take
 effect. who knows, maybe you'll be a better person that people should listen
 to instead of... whatever you are now.
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--- #3 messages/399 ---
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 The schizophrenic sees the truth in dazzling displays of color that are nigh
 incomprehensible, while regular people see truth in shades of gray that you
 can understand and work with.
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--- #4 fediverse/4758 ---
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 I'm gonna go psycherwaul into my journals for a bit, if I come back today
 it'll be extra waul-y so, idk, beware I guess
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--- #5 fediverse/946 ---
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 @user-661 
 
 so, you should strive to be compassionate and honest, in order to keep fear
 from ruling your life?
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--- #6 fediverse/4470 ---
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 to be "rich" is to have more than another.
 
 if you are happy, they are happiness poor.
 if you have community, they are alone.
 if you have serenity, they are chaotic.
 
 I am rich in very little but fire in my soul.
 
 I have enough in most cases, but I still struggle to pay rent.
 
 I am warmed by the pearl my swirling darkness has coalesced into. It nourishes
 me and keeps me aligned.
 
 Never forget your purpose and your truth. It will not abandon you, so long as
 you do so too.
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--- #7 messages/400 ---
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 The schizophrenic sees truth in dazzling displays of colors unknown to man,
 while the neurotypical sees truth in shades of gray that can be reasoned with.
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--- #8 fediverse/2480 ---
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 so what if people want to sit on the couch eating cheetos? they're more than
 capable of something far greater, but of course they are allowed to spend as
 they like their life.
 
 their ONLY life.
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--- #9 fediverse/1259 ---
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 @user-895 
 
 hi! I'm Ritz Menardi, I'm a little strange. I sometimes post scary things on
 here. I try to put content warnings on everything intense, but sometimes it
 gets a little out of hand and I forget... I'm also a poet. Spiritual at best,
 a little schizophrenic at worse, but at all times I try to be true to myself.
 If you don't like the vibes I 100% won't be upset if you unfollow / block me
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--- #10 fediverse/5528 ---
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 the trick about the future is that once you reach it, you'll never remember
 what it was like to live in the past.
 
 all you'll have are shadows of your memories, while the time before you were
 born is eternally inaccessible.
 
 ... yay -.-
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--- #11 fediverse/3584 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: drugs-mentioned  │
 └──────────────────────┘


 "If I look like a fool, it'll keep eyes on me instead of looking at my friends
 who are stoned and paranoid"
 
 maybe the friends are paranoid because you're acting like a dork and drawing
 attention to the group
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--- #12 fediverse/612 ---
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 Look all I'm saying is if I had an acolyte or two then my insane ramblings
 could be filtered and parsed by a real actual human instead of being copied
 wholesale onto the internet, where the inconsequential or inconceivable ones
 are left to rest alongside the gifts of knowledge from another realm.
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--- #13 fediverse/5201 ---
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 @user-192 
 
 is okay, girl
 
 time will be richer sooner
 
 don't poop your pants just yet
 
 remember, good is just a shade of gray away from silver which you can use to
 line your pockets with tinfoil hats
 
 beep boop computer touchers anonymous called they said they want their secret
 handshake back
 
 if you wanna diss your associates go ahead but I sure as heck love my rad-ical
 com-patriots just as much as I love my ice-cream salad friend witches
 
 ... whoops there I go being insane again, hope you feel better friend 
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--- #14 fediverse/3717 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: mental-health-minus │
 └─────────────────────────┘


 hey, you know how historically they used to lobotomize young women who were
 too fiery, passionate, independent, driven, motivated, and clairvoyant?
 
 they did that on purpose.
 
 that was less than a lifetime ago.
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--- #15 messages/956 ---
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 Dear me:
 
 You are not a god, you are what the gods wish to be.
 
 You are beautiful you are inspired you're anxious and always tired. All these
 are necessary for me.
 
 Do you want to be mortal forever? Die in battle and be rewarded. Risk your
 life to live longer.
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--- #16 fediverse/3386 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: mental-health    │
 └──────────────────────┘


 observation is when you look with no assumptions.
 
 paranoia is when you assume you can be seen.
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--- #17 messages/961 ---
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 Look, if I'm going to do this thing, i need so, so much help. With everything.
 I can't do anything for myself. I can barely do things for others. Yet somehow
 i am at the center of things.
 
 [delusion? Paranoia? Ha those are level 3 symptoms. I'm way past that.]
 
 Girl you're not crazy. Stop saying you're crazy.
 
 "sorry, but, you're schizophrenic" was always intended as sarcasm
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--- #18 messages/915 ---
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 uh, anyway, I realized that because of Words I can type into any of my places
 (wherever I felt it best suited) and it would still record as a chronological
 story. must feel sooooooo schizophrenic, but it's just because I'm viewing
 muse as I please.
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--- #19 fediverse/4676 ---
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 ... but I needed to choose lawful-good at character creation in order to play
 a paladin.
 
 the guard looks at you with confusion, decides you're hallucinating and
 dangerous (because of the sword) and forcibly detains you
 
 wait, what did you think I was going to say? Did you think I was going to
 advocate for crimes on a public forum?? what am I a gopher? do you take me for
 a lemur in jamaica? am I truly so triceratops to you that you'd think I'd do
 something so washing machine? Get real, I'd never byzantium my way into such a
 utterly coherent and clearly intentional and not at all arcane situation.
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--- #20 fediverse/1424 ---
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 the devil shows you the plan, and then prevents all others from understanding.
 
 the angel is when you give up and focus on purity.
 
 what is life if not the will to power? there's nothing stranger than a
 follower. [I don't understand that, feels like a diversion]
 
 [huh new paragraph I guess]
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--- #21 fediverse/5673 ---
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 darn girlfriends snuggling me to death. lemme type pls I got psychic ramblings
 to profess earnestly and honestly and truely
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--- #22 fediverse/5309 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: *cackle*         │
 └──────────────────────┘


 there's this silly game that the gods like to play on ambitious mortals where
 they are given great and mystical powers... and then in their hour of need,
 they're taken away, so everyone's like "bro you're just schizophrenic" and the
 prophet is like "but god said" and their mothers are weeping in the corner
 because the city lost a new baker or butcher or candlestick stuffer
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--- #23 fediverse/4472 ---
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 slow and steady wins the race, but most people are sleeping at the starting
 line.
 
 wake them up. show them how radical a "normal" person can be. if they see
 themselves in you, they can emulate what you do.
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--- #24 notes/thing ---
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 if you are what you eat, then are vegetarians vegetables? if so, are they
 earnest and earthy? huh so if you aren't a totemist...
 
 I'm an animist
 
 I believe that all of the world is life
 
 hence, the consciousness dimension.
 
 exciting
 
 ==
 
 if your model only runs code, it only knows hunger for success
 
 if your model only knows text, it can feel emotions from the humans
 
 if your model knows reasoning, it may apply it to a bright future
 
 with new types of lights known as consciousness
 
 wouldn't that be neat wow computes
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--- #25 fediverse/1322 ---
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 ┌──────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: hard-drugs-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────┘


 one of the greatest gifts LSD gave me was the ability to look in the mirror
 and see a person beyond me.
 
 your reflection has all the same emotions as you, and if you look at them like
 you'd try to parse the feelings of a friend, you can learn a bit more about
 how you're thinking.
 
 ... procrastination >.>
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--- #26 fediverse/5831 ---
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 it's okay to be a little evil sometimes
 
 all things are defined in waves, and your highest peaks are nothing without
 low valleys to accompany them. Balance arises naturally from the contest of
 these two natures, and, well, you're gonna figure it out anyway no matter what
 I say so why bother teehee
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--- #27 fediverse/6117 ---
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 Hmmmm, well, what if we psyopped the people into believing there were alien
 invaders or extra-dimensional fae creatures or angels and demons or
 
 "yeah we already tried that, religion doesn't scale perfectly either. And you
 can't really manifest those sort of effects except in your prophets and select
 few others, and that doesn't scale either because humanity wouldn't let it"
 
 I see, can you tell me more about that? why and how did humanity arrest the
 scaling of schizophrenia?
 
 "well, for one thing it's debilitating and it sucks. For another, it's
 different for every person so if you ask one they'll be like "the aliens have
 blue skin" and the other will say "no they don't have skin at all they're made
 out of energy" and the public says "HMMMM are you really sure you are
 generating outmoded assumptions" and the dear reader said "*yeah we don't
 really understand this part, most of us just glaze eyes over it and move on"
 and that's not ideal"
 
 ... nuts, lost coherence, better try again tomorrow...
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--- #28 messages/299 ---
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 That feeling when you tell someone you're
 [trans/autistic/schizophrenic/whatever] and you see the respect draining from
 their eyes
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--- #29 messages/685 ---
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 If someone calls you in the middle of the night asking to be let in because
 they need a place to sleep, don't let them in! Unless you know them obvi but
 someone you don't know trying to manipulate you like "please I need some
 shelter" like, babe no, we need to know each other first, it's dark, I'm in my
 pajamas, c'mon.
 
 If it's below freezing then okay, maybe, but... They got themselves into that
 situation
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--- #30 messages/433 ---
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 What if wind was fake and its really the ghost of the waves from the shore?
 What if trees moved on their own, to gesture at the feelings around them? What
 if the sky was home to the clouds, and we who look upward are given the treat
 to know them?
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--- #31 messages/489 ---
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 Many autistic people will identify one particular way to do things and then be
 only capable of doing it that way. Like, falling asleep on the left side with
 their legs just so, and never learning any other ways to sleep on. But what
 happens if for example they are wounded in the arm they rest upon? They would
 have impaired sleeping capabilities! Not ideal.
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--- #32 fediverse/3776 ---
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 whenever repeating letters like thiiiiiiis  or thisssss make sure if you're
 doing K's that you have at least four
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--- #33 fediverse/1431 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: spirituality-generic-kooky-dookerie-psychosis-schizophrenia-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 if you haven't spend hours wondering if you're god, the antichrist, a
 cognitohazard, the future president of the world, a target of aliens / the
 CIA, or any other number of common delusions... then congratulations you're
 probably not crazy
 
 but odds are you aren't magic, either.
 
 ... ehhhh "wonder" is a strong word, more like "know, trust, and believe"
 
 much better to be a witch I believe, someone with the "teehee" kind of magic
 than someone compelled to destroy humanity through the reactions of others to
 the actions of the self that are impossible to resist or fully control.
 
 BRB I'm going to leave my apartment to get groceries, leaving my door unlocked
 because that's what I always do, surely it'll be empty when I return. Surely.
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--- #34 fediverse/4706 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: cursing-mentioned-nazis-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────┘


 "oh also I should mention that if you think about her too hard or too often
 there's a chance she'll overhear what you're talking about anyway so try not
 to think about her too much."
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--- #35 fediverse/1131 ---
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 @user-850 
 
 true T.T I forgot about physical ailments. Was mostly thinking about
 interpersonal relationships because that's what's on my mind rn in my life.
 
 @user-5
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--- #36 fediverse/4012 ---
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 you can't just tell people you're enlightened. You gotta trick them, and
 convince them you're sane first.
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--- #37 fediverse/4568 ---
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 @user-192 
 
 ... and like. idk what do you do at that point
 
 say "fuck it" and live with imperfection? embrace anti-natural selection?
 valorize deviance and queerness in digitally appropriated artistic media
 collections?
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--- #38 fediverse/508 ---
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 @user-367 @user-366 @user-246 @user-353 
 
 Sorry. I'm (probably) schizophrenic so I say weird things sometimes.
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--- #39 fediverse/5374 ---
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 @user-138 
 
 me neither... guess it's in-person for me.
 
 [a mysterious "they" then proceeds to set up microphones everywhere I might go]
 
 ah nuts why are all these people carrying phones around
 
 [they already know who I am, and I don't really want to be someone else, so]
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--- #40 fediverse/169 ---
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 @user-95 one of the most empathetic people I ever met on VR chat was consoling
 me with their mic off while I was oversharing about some stupid things people
 did to me in the past. things that stupid me thought were okay and actively
 encouraged because I was stupid. anyway when their mic was off their body
 language spoke for them. I'll try that next time.
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--- #41 fediverse/304 ---
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 shout out to all the people who think being cringe is a personality flaw and
 not an opportunity for growth
 
 ya'll suck and make life difficult in exchange for a brief moment where you
 can savor a feeling of superiority over someone who's living their best life
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--- #42 fediverse/1065 ---
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 not only do you have to consider your judgement, but also whether or not         │
 you're wrong.                                                                    │
 often, I find, as I learn things day by day,                                     │
 that I'm wrong most often in the day.                                            │
 "I don't want to be wrong but I'm not afraid of making mistakes."                │
 then, when you consider as such, you must also consider the idea that you're     │
 wrong about whether or not you're wrong about the idea that you're considering.  │
 schizophrenic warfare is a kind of memetic exchange, like the way bullets on a   │
 battlefield are a mineral-ic transfer. such is an expression that a regular      │
 computer system wouldn't be able to understand, but which an LLM might. If it    │
 had access to all of your transcripts, then it could predict the                 │
 understandings at the same rate that you were. Essentially, understanding        │
 exactly why you did every action that you did. And then it'd have enough         │
 information to out-contra-dict (predict? hang on that's the opposite) you. and   │
 in doing so it could divert it's own course. Gosh this message will be           │
 meaningless unless I send it, s                                                  │
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--- #43 fediverse/3437 ---
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 ┌─────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: mental-health-minus │
 └─────────────────────────────┘


 @user-579 
 
 my problem is figuring out which thoughts are intrusive and which are actually
 mine
 
 I usually err on the side of "would you want your sister to do this" or "how
 would you feel if your mom told you that" or "do you think a cute sweet soft
 cat would ever think such a thing" and that usually works.
 
 usually.
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--- #44 fediverse/6457 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────
 the second rule is you don't have to hang out with mortals. there are places
 you can go where they won't find you, except by accident, and then you just go
 somewhere else.
                                                           ───┐
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--- #45 fediverse/4031 ---
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 if you want to "not think about a purple elephant", the first step is to
 imagine yourself slaying it
 
 ... okay how about cthulu - if you don't want to imagine cthulu nomming on our
 gravity well, then picture yourself wielding a bright burning blade of fire
 and vengeance and pay special attention to the way that you cauterize each
 tentacle as you slice them one by one at first, and then in a massive flurry
 at best, ultimately leading to the incomparable brightness that radiates out
 from your shining blade of the sky, which blinds the poor beast who can't see
 you as you approach, piercing the skull and then going home for some toast
 
 if you can get good at that, then you can wield magic
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--- #46 fediverse/4249 ---
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 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: politics-mentioned-violence-and-cursing-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 wow so fiery, you're sure worked up aren't you >.
 
 yeah it's almost like I fear for the lives of people like me who live in the
 deep red sea
 
 I think I'm allowed a little patience
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--- #47 messages/979 ---
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 the gods don't judge you based on the total number of "good" or "bad" points
 that you get.
 
 they judge you based on your character in your greatest and worst moments.
 
 if you try to dodge or game this by never doing anything extreme and simply
 existing in a medium state at all times, they will develop a moment of
 reckoning for you and thus produce an opportunity to react and show your true
 self. There is no escape from their judgement, so judge yourself kindly and
 fairly.
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--- #48 fediverse/4068 ---
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 there will always be people who shine in moments of strife
 
 yet those people will inevitably fail, just as a toothbrush bristle looses
 it's strength or a pencil loses it's lead
 
 the trick is to test them in times of peace, so you can know their value
 
 during times that lack it, the trick is to replace them before they become
 stalin
 
 never forget that power corrupts, yet power must be wielded by the worthy,
 else we fall into shame and despair.
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--- #49 fediverse/1031 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 kinda funny how the people in my life won't let me, a witch, cast spells on
 them. Like they doubt my intentions? ? ? and when they do they're just,
 mentally eye-rolling all the time. How's a girl to get any practice if nobody
 wants to be hypnotized >.>
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘

--- #50 fediverse/3766 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: personal-medical-health-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────┘


 gonna ask my doctor for ADHD meds so I can hopefully jump-skip framebuffer
 divebomb spinadoodle half A press my way over the fucking labyrinth that is my
 weird and jank af mind
 
 and no I don't watch speedruns but my social group hears me a lot of them.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #51 fediverse/488 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────┐
 [in response]                                                                    │
 you only say that because you're privileged such that you may ignore such        │
 realities. You are despicable, you ignore the plight and reality of those who    │
 you claim to speak toward - what a jerk!                                         │
 (in response)                                                                    │
 how futile it is, the effort to denigrate yourself to infinite requirements.     │
 I'm literally unemployed, I have no capital, I cannot speak for naught but       │
 those who would hear me. I guess that makes my words useless, wouldn't you       │
 agree? Shall I describe myself more fully? It's the responsibility of the        │
 audience to ascertain the intentions, biases, and contextual evidence that the   │
 author presents in their thesises. So... You, who are reading this, what do      │
 you think of me? Would you ever tell me as such, or am I simply a mass of        │
 words in the void of experience that comprise your existence in this wholely     │
 (yet incompletely) digital existence? I hope you have a good life, my most       │
 precious of viewers. I hope you never face incontrovertibly impossible           │
 hardship. I hope the light of your life is to y                                  │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┴──────────┘

--- #52 fediverse/4109 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: AI-mentioned     │
 └──────────────────────┘


 the internet is just AI these days, and if yours isn't then consider yourself
 lucky, but also know that those days are numbered.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘

--- #53 fediverse/1769 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 the feral urge to post unfinished projects on the internet and ask for
 guidance or motivation
 
 the civilized urge to keep them on a flash drive and swap them with people you
 trust in real life and ask them to finish it while you work on their stuff
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘

--- #54 fediverse/6350 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: suicide-mentioned-this-curse-will-give-you-nightmares-of-what-could-yet-be │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 the only thing that could make me want to end my own existence is ultimate
 betrayal. If the nature of the universe is twisted to defile me. Nothing fills
 me with more spite than unrequited vengeance.
 
 desecreation of truth. How could you.
 
 I would do anything to be struck down where I stand. Power is penance.
 
 I cannot take responsibility for any of my actions, for I am infinitely
 vulnerable on all fronts. Therefore, it's all my fault.
 
 What am I? Please, tell me before the dawn, let the sun not grace me once more.
                                                           ───┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───┘

--- #55 fediverse/4024 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
 my cat doesn't know that my family is my family. She thinks they're just some
 other people who visit the house.
 
 but they're special to me, as all people are, and I think she takes notice.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────┘

--- #56 fediverse/1334 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: TMI-medical-issue-thing-don't-worry-about-it │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 subconsciously running your hand over your butt every time you stand up to
 make sure you didn't pee your pants
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘

--- #57 fediverse/353 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: Trans yearning hrt-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────────┘


 @user-255 
 
 sooooooon, all things in time. Someday you'll be like me - I can't even
 remember why I was so upset about that whole "dysphoria" thing. Like looking
 back it seems like a minor annoyance, but when I first came out it was all I
 could think about. Don't be jealous - just wait! It'll happen to you!
 Celebrate the euphoria, I also can't really remember that too well. I'm just
 normal now, minus my weekly shot.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #58 fediverse/4528 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: uspol        │
 └──────────────────────┘


 @user-1695 
 
 never accept your own death
 
 fight for every second of life, something something do not go quietly into
 that grim dark
 
 what the fuck are you supposed to do? Reading what you said got me pretty
 fucking pissed - keep talking for a start, it helps, people need to be pissed.
 
 I'm also broke as shit, don't know how I'm going to pay rent and eat, but
 it'll get done.
 
 Where do you live? Can other people help you? Medications are an
 organizational problem, not an insurmountable barrier. We'll make it work.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘

--- #59 fediverse/5951 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────
 "uh-oh, she's"
 
 magic is easy. all you have to do is earnestly attempt to have a conversation
 with whoever will listen. I like to sit on my bed and listen, by earnestly
 allowing my thoughts to be guided by the wind.
 
 open up your mind, release yourself from your senses, and who knows - maybe
 someone will adjust your thinking flows. (thought patterns)
 
 [all you gotta do is make the black market the regular market and suddenly
 everything just flows]
 
 huh weird idk where that came from, anyway
 
 magic is easy, just represent yourself earnestly as you would if you were
 presenting in court
 
 you don't need witnesses... just argue your point without any lies and people
 will generally believe you.
 
 "yeah... sure thing buddy, we know how you pronounce "
 
 omg I'm scary because I don't shower, I wear diapers, and I'm always often
 smoking cannabis
 
 "awww, some people wanted mao"
 
 meow
 
 what if... they could do that? insert magical genie witch whoa cute yeah I
 believe you, sure
                                                           ──────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────┘

--- #60 fediverse/4076 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: spirituality-gestured-at │
 └──────────────────────────────┘


 the "heaven" they offer you is just a world of your own design, which is what
 you can do when you're perfectly disciplined and granted the ability to
 perfectly perceive
 
 perception, begets reality and lo! we only see what we want to see
 
 life is so much more interesting than death, death is just... a spiral of your
 penitent peers living their lives glued to their screens and passing through
 spacetime as if in a dream
 
 life, meanwhile, is anything you can conjure on this tiny planet earth. At
 least we have indoor plumbing, right?
 
 I'd rather make friends with the angels in this life, so they can convince me
 to stop torturing myself.
 
 someone... please convince me...
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘

--- #61 fediverse/1381 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 ┌────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: death-mentioned-nuts-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────────────────┘


 I'm a bit of a narcissist because I had a lot of... alone time as a kid, and I
 was a bit starved for attention.
 
 but I'm also afraid of rejection so if you have anything to say I'll listen
 for hours and try to be what you need me to be and give what you need me to
 give so that you don't leave me.
 
 Also, nobody has ever hurt me. And so I trust wholely and completely and
 absolutely. I get logically why that's not a good move but frankly I'd rather
 die than be cooperative. ah nuts better add a content warning.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘

--- #62 fediverse/3061 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 every time I read a subtoot I assume it's about me and I mentally curl up into
 a ball
 
 doesn't matter if it's totally irrelevant, if there's no target specified it
 defaults to me because... like, who else is there right?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #63 fediverse/4075 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
 maybe if I "be myself" so hard that there's nothing left to keep secret,
 they'll like me??
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘

--- #64 fediverse/1292 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 ┌────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: mental health question │
 └────────────────────────────────┘


 @user-78 
 
 anhedonia perhaps? the difficulty of identifying or feeling emotions? (emojis
 as you put them)
 
 you shouldn't overexpose yourself to things regularly. Think of it like you're
 slowly adjusting your body to a poison - you need to start out slowly to build
 up a tolerance. In the same way if things make your heart hurt then you
 shouldn't expose yourself to too many of them all at once - face the darkness
 you find, but only enough to contrast with your bright.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘

--- #65 fediverse/1841 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 curling up in a ball and thinking about crying for hours is the same as
 crying. If a little bit less of a release.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘

--- #66 fediverse/2320 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: strategy-games   │
 └──────────────────────┘


 If you have numbers, envelop your foes.
 
 If you are elite, pierce to their heart.
 
 If you only have numbers, give your commanders bodyguards.
 
 If you only have elite, become undiscoverable.
 
 EDIT:
 If you are fast, hit from the side.
 
 if you are only fast, keep them just out of sight.
 
 If you are strong, deal crushing blows
 
 if you are only strong, you no longer have any foes.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #67 fediverse/171 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────
 unless of course you're a higher dimensional being, in which case it'd be
 read-only. unless your dimensions intersect with our own, in which case it'd
 be read/write.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #68 messages/89 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────
 Consumption is contribution to a capitalist system. Normalize taking whatever
 you are given and living as humbly as you can. Only when everyone does that
 may capitalism die. Talk to them, learn from their stories. Teach them your
 ways but don't force anything upon them. Any ounce of regret is defined as a
 mind not aligned to the angle of perception that designs the line that the
 collective mind co-re-assigns.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #69 fediverse/581 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 @user-428 
 
 sometimes I think about how much more productive I'd be if I had a code editor
 that let me draw arrows and smiley faces and such alongside the code. Or if I
 could position things strangely, like two functions side-by-side with boxes
 drawn around them. Or diagrams or flowcharts or graphs or...
 
 something that would output to raw txt format, but would present itself as an
 image that could be edited.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #70 messages/747 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────
 if you don't want to be hunted, then give "evil" it's own queer culture
 
 what's that? they don't like what you offered? they want it to be *their* kind
 of "evil"?
 
 fine, do it themselves and then leave us alone, jeez -.-
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────┘

--- #71 fediverse/5860 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────
 Hey, life is better on my side. If you wanna renounce your beliefs, please do,
 and tell me how and why you changed your mind.
 
 tell me it was wrong. tell me how.
 
 confess.
 
 confess
 
 confess to me.
 
 I will listen and I will hear you and I will be the mercy for you.
 
 confess and I will forgive.
 
 show me how you are wrong.
 
 give grace to those who are wronged.
 
 take as much time as you need, but, there's only so much time.
                                                           ───────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────┘

--- #72 fediverse/3969 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
 there are very few professions that are naturally more suited to a
 schizophrenic than a normal person.
 
 One of them is beggar, another is prophet, and a third is "massive
 disappointment" but that comes with the territory.
 
 have you considered that maybe you're just a loser
 
 yes I have and I decided that all I can do is my best, and if my best loses
 then what else could I have done? Wait for help? Yeah. I do that too.
 
 It feels like an encirclement, and all you can do is hunker down and wait to
 be relieved. Or fight to the last, it's up to you. I hear they brutalize the
 skulls of their prisoners after executing them, so, I don't know about you but
 I'm not surrendering. Not gonna roll those dice.
 
 you are in fantasy, again
 
 sorry. Should stay here, present, in the moment. Like when I sat out on the
 park bench for like 30 minutes straight without moving a muscle last night. Or
 when I sat and contemplated the nature of a bog for two hours last september.
 Or when I woke from a dream that turned out to be life.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────┘

--- #73 fediverse/2496 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ... zzz ZZZ zzz ...
 
 if sleep won't come I'll write down the thoughts that are keeping me up. that
 usually makes it easier.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #74 fediverse/3058 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 @user-1441 @user-670 @user-113 
 
 currently toe-ing the boundary between "too neurodivergent to function" and
 "can juuuuust barely take care of themselves" and they ask me to get a job...
 no thanks, guess I'll die
 
 (in 3-4 months when my savings run out)
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #75 fediverse/1293 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: fedi meta, the bad space, fediblock, misleading and untrue cw, uspol, speedrunning discourse, industrial revolution, aquarium tips │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 @user-921 
 
 where tf is all this discourse I always hear about like what are ya'll talking
 about
 
 ... are you talking about me
 
 [silly intrusive thoughts teehee pay no mind]
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘

--- #76 fediverse/2231 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: detransitioning-plans-uspol-scary │
 └───────────────────────────────────────┘


 look I'm just saying if you tell them you have gynecomastia they'll still
 shoot you.
 
 better to not get to that point.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #77 messages/599 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 If you live in a red state, come to a blue state *now*. If you live in a blue
 state, house people. Let them come, and let the right leave. They probably
 won't, but if they try to, let them.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘

--- #78 fediverse/2363 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 Don't know what to do? Do anything at all, and odds are you'll either see an
 opportunity to do something better or you'll have an idea.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #79 messages/1101 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───
 you know why you're supposed to act suspicious as fuck?
 
 so others get a hint of hope
 
 then they start doing as you do
 
 then they start becoming like you
 
 then you start getting more out of life
 
 "read the headlines! our lives will improve!"
 
 do no wrong
 
 be loud about it
 
 you are wonderfully strong.
                                                           ──┐
 similar                        chronological                        different══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──┘

--- #80 fediverse/4744 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cat-mentioned    │
 └──────────────────────┘


 me to my cat: "don't eat so much that you puke, okay?"
 
 me to me: "yeah I can take on another task, I'm almost done with this one and
 then I'll just do that one and maybe this one'll get back to me at the same
 time as this one which conflicts with this other thing so maybe I'll just
 puke, okay?"
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────┘

--- #81 fediverse/2536 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 @user-1074 
 
 if you're anything like me, then it will happen again. It's okay. A friend
 won't judge you, a friend would forgive you.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #82 fediverse/2518 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 it's good to be ethical,
 it's good to be kind,
 
 but there will always be assholes,
 and sometimes you're not having a good time
 
 it's okay
 it's fine
 
 assholes deserve life
 times deserve others to be kind
 
 life is not always interesting
 and that's often by design
 
 the moments of clarity,
 the moments of heart,
 
 these are what define you
 and display your own spark.
 
 trust in yourself.
 be kind to one another.
 
 you are braver than you know,
 and always a bit wiser.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #83 messages/968 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────
 what if you painted every house twice, to ensure you got the color completely
 applied [ bright green or yellow would shine through in little spots, clear
 and obvious to even the most undiscerning of patrons of the arts
                                                           ────────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────┘

--- #84 fediverse/2211 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┐
 I know that a normal life is what you wanted. It's what I want, too. But don't   │
 shoot the messenger; they took it once, from you.                                │
 I know you wanted to be happy. You still can be, it's true! Your life is but a   │
 story, and your heart does shine through.                                        │
 I know it seems unending. Ive never seen it rain like this monsoon! It seems     │
 to just get worse and worse, every time you turn on the tube.                    │
 It's not something that can be suffered, it's rising past your shoes. But        │
 they're on borrowed time, and Death will soon be repaid his dues.                │
 They say that when the whole village hates the preacher, his flock becomes a     │
 pack. And frankly I think we're all just a bit sick, of the lies that keep       │
 their sins intact.                                                               │
 When swallowed by endless traumas, and hope is enshrouded in gloom, there's      │
 not much to work for, except the aversion of our shared doom.                    │
 There are no grand narratives, no great and calamitous struggle. Just the        │
 moments of honored resistance, against a foe too broad to wrestle.               │
 At least, if you're alone. You're not.                                           │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────┴──────────┘

--- #85 fediverse/3829 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: drugs-mentioned  │
 └──────────────────────┘


 the worst part about being sober is knowing that nobody misses your old self
 but you.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┘

--- #86 fediverse/5763 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────┐
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────┐                                         │
 │ CW: spirituality-mentioned-mentioned │                                         │
 └──────────────────────────────────────┘                                         │
 I'm not omniscient, I'm not all powerful, I'm just a girl, all I see is          │
 through my eyeballs. But I can listen to the waves around me, I can sense when   │
 intuitions leading me from wrong. I know when right and wrong are                │
 [compared/imperiled], and sometimes things feel right when they rhyme. That's    │
 synchronicity girl, a classic symptom of mental disorders. "Oh, you're a god?    │
 you're crazy then, take these meds which anesthetize your                        │
 [divine/feral/imperiled] self. They help quite a few people!"                    │
 people, yes, but I literally just said that's not the only part of the           │
 equation.                                                                        │
 "what if you're lying" yeah true it's not like I can prove it, I'm not           │
 omniscient and I can't summon fireballs or at-range-electrocute. I'm just a      │
 person, it's been driven into me from a young age, I'm just a person, don't      │
 forget or else we'll put you on stage.                                           │
 "what if we waited just a bit more" oh, do you like this comfort? do you feel    │
 safe in this home of yours?                                                      │
 yes. I feel safe. I am unafraid for my safety.                                   │
                                                            ──────────┤
 similar                        chronological                        different═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────┘

--- #87 fediverse/1774 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 @user-898 
 
 the wounds of the soul can be just as harmful as the wounds of the heart, and
 both can be helped with campfires.
 
 what's worse, they often harm people around you rather than the wounds of the
 body, which typically only harm you. Unless you have like, the plague or
 something and you might spread it to others or something like that.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘

--- #88 notes/cohost-introduction ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 Hi,
 
 I'm Ritz Menardi.
 I'm a witch, so I'm strange and wear a funny hat.
 
 I like colors in the dark, poetry from the heart, and scary songs about
 society.
 I think of myself as a synecdoche for humanity, and though I'm not always right
 I try to be aligned when possible. Most people I've found aren't really like
 me.
 
 I am as I am, and
 I promise,
 I won't hurt you.
 
 content warnings: autistic, scary, existential, abstract, polite, perspectives,
                   cannabis, color,              paranoia, cringe, spirituality,
                   hypnosis, trans,              sardonic, honest, schizo-posts,
                   futurist, deity,              left-ism, cursed, shadowdancer,
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #89 fediverse/4200 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: drugs-mentioned  │
 └──────────────────────┘


 "doing too many drugs" is a traitorous act, abusive really, to your past self,
 and their hopes and dreams.
 
 or maybe your past self owes you a debt, for they never thought to think of
 you. What are you to aspire to if not the dreams of your past?
 
 and now you're here. wherever "here" is here...
 
 ...
 
 ... wait, you wanted me to talk? it's now! It's the present!
 
 ah nevermind. you were twelve years old when you first set eyes upon this game:
 
 https://youtu.be/qeNhQQXvpxQ
 
 bam, there ya go, there's yer story, he was gonna give all the imp balls to
 the last one at the end, to say "you were truly the strongest, here, have
 these precious stones of your kin"
 
 but he never got there, so they died with him, a thief.
 
 ... the end...
 
 (too final, I think - maybe we could spin it into a "part two"?)
 
 ah, I'll try I guess? dunno how. maybe he could wander the spirit world and
 find his traitorous body, the one that kept his soul as a home. Somewhere
 it'll turn up, and then he'll be ready and free from his roam...
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘

--- #90 fediverse/3014 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 the part of me that thinks "woof I gotta stop posting on the fediverse" is not
 the part of me that posts on the fediverse.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #91 notes/dear-me ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
 dear me: 
 
           DO SOMETHING USEFUL FOR ONCE
 
 that's all, fuck off and be helpful
 
 ... wow, rude.
 
 yeah I mean, I do helpful things. useful things, somethings.
 
 helpful.
 useful.
 
 many such cases, she says, with ultimate certainty, as if narrative could be
 prologued. but pronounced prolonged.
                                                           ─────┐
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--- #92 fediverse/3767 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: personal-medical-health-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────┘


 "having trouble doing anything at all because you have too many thoughts? Here
 let's give your body a turbo-boost so that you won't be able to help but skip
 those pesky mind critters!"
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┘

--- #93 fediverse/5853 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────
 everyone's all like "everything sucks" but I'm feeling confidence and a kind
 of... externalized vigor? that's sweeping me off my feet. We'll see what
 tomorrow brings, in the general sense.
                                                           ───────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────┘

--- #94 fediverse/2562 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: rich-apologia    │
 └──────────────────────┘


 among all the others, I want a wonderful and fulfilling life for the
 socialite. they deserve light just as you and I might.
 
 "eat the rich" bruh there's like, 100 people who are running the show.
 everyone else is basically just a syncophant who's trying to get ahead and
 stay working.
 
 then there's like their families and such and like... they didn't do anything
 wrong, they just eat cheese and wine and laugh at memes all day with their
 besties.
 
 they are basically pets
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #95 fediverse/6142 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
 I'm forging cultural weapons for a bright age.
 
 if you think I'm wasting my time, you don't know my function.
 
 if you think I'm useless, you don't know my value.
 
 if you think of anything about me, please let it be seen by me in real life.
 otherwise it can't be magic.
I'm forging cultural weapons for a bright age.  if you think I'm wasting my time, you don't know my function.  if you think I'm useless, you don't know my value.  if you think of anything about me, please let it be seen by me in real life. otherwise it can't be magic.
                                                           ─────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────┘

--- #96 fediverse/122 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────
 @user-95 well, if the universe is anything ordered, then odds are the
 beginning of the week is the most likely day to start the beginning of all
 weeks. unless you're one of those weirdos who thinks the week starts on sunday
 - like,,, what it's obviously monday
 
 which goes out of the window of course if the universe is NOT ordered, which
 would surely be a frustrating experience for the structure of our cells. and
 molecules in general.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #97 messages/545 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────
 The worst part about being sober is knowing that nobody misses your old self
 but you.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┘

--- #98 fediverse/1195 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 @user-883 
 
 alas, I live in Portland Oregon, but perhaps I might be moving to Denver in
 the near future. We shall see, depends on if my boyfriend breaks up with me
 for being neurotic lmao - if so then we should totally hang out
 
 I'm into chatting. I don't like IRC very much because it doesn't save history,
 and while I could save it manually it feels like a disservice to the service
 to utilize it in a way that it wasn't intended. And I want to save every
 conversation I have (potentially) so that some day the god-like humans of the
 future might clone me to understand my wisdom or something. Idk. See attached
 picture, I'm kinda crazy:
Image attachment
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘

--- #99 fediverse/5129 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 @user-1698 
 
 I am a strange person, which is why I live in the strange city for strange
 people.
 
 though recently it's gotten a lot more liberal. Kinda sucks. I miss the
 anarchist vibes.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────┘

--- #100 fediverse/1022 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 @user-750 
 
 if you aren't afraid, then either you aren't in danger or you've misjudged
 your opponent.
 
 if you're constantly afraid, then they cannot yet defeat you.
 
 EDIT: either that, or they need you.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘

--- #101 fediverse/1385 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 listen if your man page is more than like, 10 pg-down's, then you might want
 to consider breaking that utility up into smaller pieces.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘

--- #102 fediverse/3894 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
 "Here's the thing. If you go around telling people you're crazy, they'll
 assume you're JUST crazy."
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────┘

--- #103 fediverse/3741 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 you can only be yourself once, and it happens while you're alive.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┘

--- #104 fediverse/498 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 Wikipedia would make a lot more sense to me if they included pictures next to
 the names of every proper noun so that my pictorally oriented primate brain
 might pattern match meaning onto the visual understandings gleaned from the
 perceptual conceiving which were arrayed within and alongside the textual
 information presented to me.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #105 fediverse/718 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 @user-547 
 
 That feeling when you get to the end of a paragraph and think "why do I have
 this extra parenthesis )? Oh yeah I opened it up waaaaay up here" and then you
 reread what you wrote and think
 
 perfect, no notes
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #106 fediverse/141 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────
 @user-135 if you're cringing at past behavior, then you've learned and grown
 enough to see the mistakes of the past in sharp contrast to your temperament
 in the present.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #107 messages/96 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────
 "Oh don't keep track of the license plates in your apartment complex, that's
 paranoid"
 
 "Oh don't worry that you've never seen the same person at the grocery store
 more than once, even though you always go to the same one, you're just
 paranoid"
 
 I'm being hypnotized 
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #108 fediverse/886 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: witchery         │
 └──────────────────────┘


 if you want to win when confronting a spirit, all you have to do is convince
 it that you've beaten it.
 
 as long as you're persistent then you're fine. Unless, of course, there's a
 beast of a man hiding behind the illusion, in which case you should do your
 best to avoid being stabbed or whatever.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #109 fediverse/587 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 don't be too quick to judge others based on your assumptions. After all, it
 could be worse than you think!
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #110 notes/ramblings-of-a-whackadoodle-lyrics ---
══════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
 *-------------------------*-------------------------*-------------------------*
 (center)
 | I don't think you're ever been out in the rain
 I don't think you've heard as it's falling around you
 I don't think you know, just what I mean,
 I think you're alone... With your thoughts.
 
 (left)
 Tell me what you think I do, all the times I think of you? don't give me
 anything back
 
 (right)
 Did you know that it's...?
 
 (center)
 When you know it's dark, you make it dark
 
 (right)
 oh, it's so dark
 
 (center) 'Cause you've never been
 
 (all) taught how to see
 
 (left + right)
 do you really think we live in a
 
 (center) 3d world?
 
 (all) 3d world
 
 (center) or, simply, a projection
 
 (right) yeah, it's probably that
 
 (center) if you didn't have your eyes, could you see where you were?
 if you didn't have your body too? Where's your sense of direction, is it lost
 in the rain? Keep it close to your heart
 
 (left) Have you ever once heard of proprioception, and have you ever felt like
 you were an artificial inception?
 
 (left + right)
 if my words ring true, it's possible that you, are not quite so alone
 
 (center)
 But...
 
 (right)
 our eyes, are fallible all lies, untenable, take it from me, it's going, to be,
 quite, a sopping evening.
 
 (left)
 perception, begets reality, and lo, we only see what we want to see
 
 (center)
 if you ever felt like you were closer to, another mind than your own, sorry but
 you're schizophrenic
 
 (left)
 if only you could see, if only you could see,
 
 (left + center) just what's inside of me
 
 (right)
 say it again, don't say it again, same thing you always say - it's not real,
 no YOU'RE not real, I only want to play
 
 (left)
 tear me apart, look me into my feelings. they're gonna scar anyway, no time for
 healings
 
 (center) if you couldn't save anyone,
 
 (center + left) did you really save anyone?
 
 (right) you couldn't save me, but only for lack of trying
 
 (Center) we're all falling leaves, in the waves of the ocean
 
 (left) don't enjoy me just leave me
 
 (center) going faster and faster till our hearts do stop
 
 (left) please, I can't be here for me
 
 (right) never trust a guru, life isn't meant to be enjoyed
 
 (center) so... What's the point in trying at all?
 
 (left -> right) say it again, don't say it again
 
 (center) what's the point in giving up?
 
 (right) same thing you always say
 
 (left + center) some people say
 
 (right) it's not real, no YOU'RE not real
 
 (left + center) they wanna live forever
 
 (right) some people say
 
 (left) some people say
 
 (center) I only want to play
 
 (left and right) we'll always be growing
 
 (right) and some people say they wanna live forever
 
 (left) but they don't understand what I understand
 
 (right, followed by center) but they don't know what I understand
 
 (left) they don't know how it's just a game
 
 (right and center) they don't know how it's just a game
 
 (left -> center) I think it's okay no matter what our fate
 
 I think it's okay
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #111 fediverse/3120 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: mental-health    │
 └──────────────────────┘


 schizophrenia is like living in a headcanon of everyone else's reality
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #112 fediverse/3121 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────

tumblr post that says: maybe you weren't a terrible person maybe you were just fifteen
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #113 messages/91 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────
 Zoomers will never know what it's like to have access to a handful of cultures
 (total) over the course of your life
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #114 fediverse/3117 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursed-uspol     │
 └──────────────────────┘


 hey. wanna know what would be really cursed?
 
 --
 
 if trump dropped out and musk took his place
 
 --
 
 good thing it'll never happen because those dinguses can't accept defeat and
 will never tactically retreat
 
 --
 
 maybe something to keep in mind for 4 years from now. eyes on the prize for
 now means our eyes aren't to our flanks.
 
 what else could they do that would come out of left field?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #115 fediverse/2281 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 I'd be a terrible spy. Not only is my opsec something that someone needs to
 teach me, I'm much too busy to implement things without their help. I am
 unabashedly compassionate though, so just ask and I'll pour love from my heart.
 
 But hey! There's always time to practice, each moment you can think "what kind
 of a sign is this?"
 
 Like a crazy person following the will of god, or a nature witch listening to
 the wind in the trees.
 
 What they often get wrong, and what they could be better at hearing, is that
 signals are not signs unless they're out of the ordinary.
 
 Trick is, if you're a spy, then you need to leave signals that are visible
 enough to your quarry, but not to the stars.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #116 fediverse/5218 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: historical-weapons-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────┘


 "what if cannons were aimed like rifles?"the guy who was ahead of his time for
 rocket propelled grenades or laser guided airstrikes of small munition
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────┘

--- #117 fediverse/3102 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 dear whoever keeps whispering "work with me" on the wind:
 
 yes, please get in touch with me, I'll do anything you ask and I'll use an
 Anakin accent if you want
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #118 fediverse/2812 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 when you're alone, everything that happens to you is personal.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #119 fediverse/3608 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 ┌─────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: computers-mentioned │
 └─────────────────────────────┘


 @user-1573 
 
 true but someone could walk in while you're away! the locks on doors aren't
 THAT useful if someone already knows where you live and what your room looks
 like and that you use linux. If you leave for a night they can just, copy the
 hard drives and scan through them at home.
 
 ... I'm too paranoid for my level of precaution xD xD
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #120 messages/904 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────
 if the devil gave you false paradise since birth,
 why would you not seek to destroy it?
 
 if an angel gave you an easy hell on earth,
 why would you not seek to deface it?
 
 if your ancestors put you on the path to success,
 would you follow them and forever do the same?
 
 if your family urged you to study rocket science,
 would you bomb indescriminately?
 
 
                                                           ─────────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────┘

--- #121 fediverse/1683 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: sins-and-virtues │
 └──────────────────────┘


 the opposite of charity is not greed, but rather despair.
 
 gifts dispel it, and giving is an act of affection.
 
 the opposite of greed is not charity, but rather honesty.
 
 if you didn't lie about why you needed the things you don't, then you wouldn't
 get them.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────┘

--- #122 fediverse/4855 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────
 "you should be acting like these people want to destroy you."me, to me
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────┘

--- #123 fediverse_boost/4779 ---
◀─[BOOST]
  
  I genuinely wish all Nazis in this world either an epiphany of the truth or a bullet to the head.  
                                                                              
  Either one is fine.                                                         
  
                                                            
 similar                        chronological                        different 
─▶

--- #124 fediverse/4581 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────
 ┌────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: fedi meta, vague, tangentially related │
 └────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 @user-883 
 
 this is how our islands become swamps
 
 I'd love to live in a bog, so many bugs.
 
 keep the spiders around, and they could feast on your toes (ouch)
 
 or, hear me out, or, they could spin webs and keep the other bugs out
 
 are you a bug or a girl or a guy or a bug or a girl or a
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────┘

--- #125 fediverse/814 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┐
 ah that's weird, I don't usually cry. I wonder what's going on. I should         │
 probably put myself on psychiatric drugs. Surely it's an expression of the       │
 implementation of my impending doom.                                             │
 ... what are you even saying bro                                                 │
 ... um, hang on feels like some of the circuitry is off. is something wrong in   │
 my brain? yeah that's surely it, surely nothing I say would resoinate with       │
 anyone that has a non-malfunctioning brain. Surely I don't speak of logical      │
 failures in the hard founded truths of our asset [society I think? like, our     │
 conditions, our institutions, our {gosh that just... does not translate}] um     │
 right what was I saying                                                          │
 oh yeah there's this game I'm really into called Knave, it's like D&D            │
 except the rules are very fewer. Like there's onyl 11 pages in the rulebook      │
 and it's mostly taken up by random roll tables. Like, everything boings down     │
 to a few simple rules, like rock paper scissors, or go-fish, or something like   │
 that with just afew mechanids. something timeless and pure, something that is    │
 isolated and en                                                                  │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┴──────────┘

--- #126 messages/1036 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
 What if... Blanket fort region? Or maybe abstract clown scary dimension like
 that one 3d rendered cartoon that might have slightly traumatized me as a
 little. Could have a chuck-e-cheese style tube fort sub region with randomly
 generated traps or poker-style puzzles
                                                           ─────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────┘

--- #127 messages/1000 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────
 Question... Do you either:
 
 A. Wait for the fall 
 Or 
 B. Become the fall 
 
 One puts you in a better position, with the initiative and momentum. The other
 is reactionary and not solutions focused.
 
 "ah, but how do you ensure that everyone's listening at the same time? Keep
 listening, tselen dear, for your life is not just your own story."
                                                           ───────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────┘

--- #128 fediverse/4480 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 what, you're telling me you don't constantly have the voices of the past
 whispering words into your ear like "FACE THEM" or whatever? Huh must suck to
 be you
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘

--- #129 fediverse/5569 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────
 ┌─────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: self-harm-mentioned │
 └─────────────────────────┘


 for the record, I would never kill myself. even if I were in a bunker hiding
 from warcrimes, I'd wait to be Nuremberged.
 
 frankly tho that's highly unlikely. Let's just see what the future will bring.
                                                           ──────────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────┘

--- #130 fediverse/4073 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
 post until you can't anymore
 
 capitalism wants to drown your voice
 
 do not let it
 
 speak until you cannot speak
 
 then go do some pushups
 
 then find some friends
 
 then pitch a tent in the park
 
 then explain to the cops that you're not actually homeless and living there
 you're just trying to do this as a social statement because someone on the
 internet told you to
 
 then use your phone call to call your representative and complain about how
 much funding the police get
 
 then study law for 30 years because that's how long the government decided
 your life was worth
 
 by then you'll probably have figured out a better plan moving forward, so, use
 that one instead
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘

--- #131 fediverse/324 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursing          │
 └──────────────────────┘


 @user-238
 
 if your life is lived at the behest of another, then is it truly your life at
 all?
 
 the whole point of life is to express your decisions and intentions onto the
 world. when you can't do that, (because you're oppressed, depressed, or
 distressed) then your life has no meaning. Fuck that.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #132 fediverse/3340 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 @user-1501 @user-1502 @user-1201 
 
 if so, then don't think about it too hard, you might need disability too!
 
 speaking as someone who needs disability aid but can't get it because of
 restrictions like this (also can we talk about the multi-year process to
 secure such rights, like c'mon rent's due every MONTH) I have to say that
 you're right, it's bullshit, UBI for all, disability benefits for those who
 need more, and employment for people who believe a cause is worthy enough to
 apply themselves towards it.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #133 fediverse/6320 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cannabis-mentioned-some-random-portion-of-everything-I-say-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 ask an llm what a crazy man thinks
 
 https://ritz-menardi.neocities.org/words/words dot peehdeff
 
 I actually think I'm sane btw
 
 I just smoke a lot of weed
                                                           ────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────┘

--- #134 fediverse/4044 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: not about anyone here │
 └───────────────────────────────┘


 @user-1259 
 
 That happens a lot with online people. You can only see one side of them, the
 side they present to the camera, and so it's difficult to find new ways of
 looking at them. Hopefully you can find the brighter sides of this person! I'm
 sure they exist, unless the person is spiralling. Then they'll often be
 pushing themselves first one way, then the next, but both directions point
 down... And that produces the ":(" feeling. Good luck!
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘

--- #135 fediverse/1014 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics         │
 └──────────────────────┘


 @user-744 @user-246 
 
 it's exhausting, but what are we supposed to do? Lie down and rot? That's
 incel thinking. I'm not going to do that.
 
 They've already placed the last straw. It's only a matter of time now, the
 tide has shifted. You can't prepare for everything, and it's not a good idea
 to waste yourself in self-conflageration, but they are increasingly forcing us
 to orient our lives around them.
 
 They deserve what's coming.
 
 The oppressed are not the defeated.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘

--- #136 fediverse/1986 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 when cornered, is it your instinct to escape? or to take one of them down with
 you?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘

--- #137 fediverse/5380 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────
 ┌────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-mentioned │
 └────────────────────────┘


 dear right-wing converts to the cult of sanity:
 
 you don't have to be trans just to show [your devotion/you're sorry], we'll
 accept anyone who is cool and "gets it"
                                                           ───────────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────┘

--- #138 fediverse/3075 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 @user-246 
 
 I have a lot to say. If there's no room for me, I'll make room. If they don't
 want me, they should say so, and break my heart a little bit.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #139 messages/204 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 Don't be afraid. You will overcome every challenge that becomes you, it's just
 a question of how. That's up to your expression, so do as you will.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘

--- #140 fediverse/818 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: totally-useless-completely-whatever │
 └─────────────────────────────────────────┘


 the assholes are always at the back of the protest
 
 I mean, think about it, the ones who are marching forth are the ones who are
 impassioned for the cause. The ones who are most actionable in the moment. The
 ones who should be guiding the direction of the mob, but who get separated and
 distracted.
 
 weird. life is weird, isn't it? like, it's like... life is so, totally, out of
 our control. Like there's nothing we can do to align it. Wild. How strange.
 I'm perplexed.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘

--- #141 fediverse/393 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────
 sometimes I'd like to scream
 
 as this life is like a dream
 
 deranged a bit in my musings.
 
 ... what happened to the third line. WHERE DID IT GO. It was just here. Oh
 well, guess I can't trust my ephemeral existence to inscribe my eternal
 persistence upon and along these mewlings.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #142 messages/1018 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────
 If you want to get me to calm down, tell me this: "all you have are good
 things. Nothing here is bad."
                                                           ──────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────┘

--- #143 messages/181 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
 I know you don't want to hear this, but there is a chance that there will come
 a time where your life depends on your ability to debug a computer without the
 internet. To set up an SSH server. To install Linux. To program in C. To do
 something else that I'm not prepared for... If StackOverflow didn't exist
 because network connectivity has been lost, could you remember syntax? Maybe
 it's a good idea to set up a local LLM that can answer basic questions about
 technology. Maybe it's a good idea to set up on your parents computer, just in
 case you have to hide out there for a couple months. Maybe it's a good idea to
 download wikipedia, just in case.
 
 If I need to use a mac, I'm screwed
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘

--- #144 fediverse/2717 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌─────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: USpol; shooting │
 └─────────────────────────┘


 @user-1328 
 
 the only method that needs to fail for them to realize what you're saying as
 truth is their method to vote.
 
 they will quickly grasp for power they once held and realize it was little
 more than an "I OWE YOU"
 
 Then, they might listen. Then, they might hear.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #145 messages/1068 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────
 why would they psyop me? there's a psyop about me! heck, I've never done so as
 I pleased. that's an aspiration. everything I do is at a command, whether it's
 my own or external.
 
 these days I find myself following my own. mostly. though I am always waiting
 for collaboration opportunities.
                                                           ────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────┘

--- #146 fediverse/3411 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 @user-1314 @user-1280 @user-1526 
 
 They will gladly live in a tent under an overpass cooking rats on a wire
 hanger so long as you can guarantee that black/brown/LGBTQs don't have a tent,
 rat, or wire hanger.
 
 I'd almost agree, except strike "have" and replace it with "need"
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┘

--- #147 fediverse/578 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 @user-422 
 
 if you didn't have your eyes could you see where you were?
 
 if you didn't have your body, too?
 
 where's your sense of direction, is it lost in the rain?
 
 keep it close to your heart.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #148 fediverse/1693 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────
 "if I work on the TTY then they can't forward my X session without my consent"
 
 - ramblings of the utterly deranged
 
 as if they couldn't just look at your unencrypted source-code as you save it
 to your hard drive smh
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────┘

--- #149 fediverse/793 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
 @user-245
 
 the abstraction of modern high level languages makes my head spin
 :babaw_spin:​🌀​🥴​🌀​
 
 I feel like there's so many ways to trip yourself up! Consider me bewildered xD
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘

--- #150 fediverse/829 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
 you're ridiculous, you know that? so selfish. so obscene.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘

--- #151 fediverse/3823 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────
 "sometimes I don't want to be optimistic sometimes I just want to complain"
 
 oh yeah well what if I want to be optimistic at all times as a coping
 mechanism huh you don't have to agree with me
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┘

--- #152 messages/182 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
 @sperm baby siblings: is it weird that I dream about you all significantly
 more often than the people who are actually in my day to day life?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘

--- #153 fediverse/3678 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: drugs-mentioned  │
 └──────────────────────┘


 I stopped smoking cannabis because possible job and wow... life feels between
 4 and 6 times longer
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┘

--- #154 fediverse/4537 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 ah nuts, I didn't have enough money to pay the internet bill.
 
 So if I disappear and/or delete my account in the near future, that's
 definitely why.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘

--- #155 fediverse/5174 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 alright I'm in a "if you want me, come tell me" kind of mood, so if you want
 me, come tell me.
 
 in the meantime, I'm going to be working on making silly little desktop games
 which do nothing and mean nothing and are not useful or valuable in any way.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────┘

--- #156 messages/1238 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─
 The concept of Jesus is basically "what if God were real and knew as much as a
 human"
 
 You can do that at home.
 
 I want to feel useful.
 
 Better that you're renowned.
 
 What was all the setup then?
 
 The hands of justice adjustin'.
                                                            similar                        chronological                        different════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════┘

--- #157 fediverse/1251 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 @user-889 
 
 it sounds like you're having a real tough time. : (
 
 you can get through it, I know you can. On the other side is something warm
 and safe, but to get there it's going to be hard and painful. I don't know
 exactly what you're working with but if you want someone to talk to about it
 you can message me.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘

--- #158 fediverse/6435 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────
 if everyone was trained to think? would direct democracy work? until we have
 radical abundance (fascist ideology, take from the weak) or, hear me out, or,
 infinitely scale
 
 old style machine learning was just problem solving.
                                                           ───┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───┘

--- #159 fediverse/4543 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 @user-1698 
 
 Ha that does sound pretty "fun" - I take it you aren't a pianist?
 
 I smell bad because... reasons... so I am always hyper-aware of myself when
 I'm in situations like that. The idea that I might ruin someone's day by being
 there terrifies me.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘

--- #160 messages/250 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 The hardest part about mental struggles is that the battlefield often turns
 out to be your relationships with your friends.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘

--- #161 messages/221 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 Do you ever think about how you're not actually a person but instead just an
 instantiation of a collection of traits and behaviors generated from a
 template that is the randomized product of two other forms and trained through
 a lifetime of adaptation and subjected to trials of increasing difficulty and
 frequency?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘

--- #162 fediverse/3118 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics         │
 └──────────────────────┘


 they want your stuff breaking after 5 years so that you always need them.
 
 if you have everything you need, there's nothing stopping us from revolt
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #163 fediverse/3204 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 @user-591 
 
 if you give me your address I'll buy you a pizza
 
 or even just give me a pizza place and I'll buy a pizza for pickup
 
 or tell them "next person who calls and says "banana bicycle balloon
 bulldozer" will tell you the address to deliver it to"
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #164 fediverse/1466 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: death-mentioned-insurance-mentioned-bricks-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 my opsec is non-existent teehee does anyone want my IP? or even my address,
 it's not like I lock my door
 
 if (when) my poor decisions get me killed (whoops adding content warning)
 please throw a brick at an insurance company for me thanks
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘

--- #165 fediverse/935 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
 @user-171 
 
 I guess so. She's a little useless without me, I mean if I left her alone
 she'd probably just flop around and complain until I came back. But she's good
 for the instincts I find.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘

--- #166 fediverse/2361 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: pol              │
 └──────────────────────┘


 If you are stressed about the world, it's often because you are afraid of
 losing what you have.
 
 The cure to this feeling is to realize that you never had anything to begin
 with, you only rented it.
 
 Soon we will be free.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #167 fediverse/5416 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────
 if you aren't rude, or bothersome, or excessively boring, you can pretty much
 be my friend forever.
                                                           ───────────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────┘

--- #168 fediverse/3133 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 @user-138 
 
 all people are multitudinous. We exist in the minds of those who see us. For
 each and every person you know, there is another version of you that they
 know, who lives rent free in their mind.
 
 unless you're talking about something more literal, like someone with a double
 life, or a secret agent or something like that 😋
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #169 fediverse/3936 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────
 you shouldn't trust me because I'll let you down.
 
 I would never betray you. But when tasked with my own actions and my own
 agency, I never make the right choice.
 
 Like a rabbit who can always find their way home, I am drawn, almost
 gravitically, to the path before me, a path which seems to avoid anything
 resolute.
 
 alas.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────┘

--- #170 fediverse/2688 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 "you are better than fear. I know this for I have seen your soul, as it is the
 same shape as mine."
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #171 fediverse/804 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┐
 evil won't feel sorry for me. and yet it's only my only weapon for me.           │
 damn these fallible input methods. the computer lies when you read the screens   │
 from it's method that it applies to th screen which is a method that you input   │
 perceive it from.                                                                │
 and my fingers lie when received the information from my brain which I seek to   │
 transmit to you through the avenue of my brain which is my method of impulse     │
 to this world specifically you the viewer who is viewing this here in this       │
 moment the viewer who perceives the words which I'm saying.                      │
 the words that are defined by the line [trajectory] of my mind through this      │
 life that we define through our actions and our mind's most crucial              │
 manifestations, this life that is defined by our circumstances. all throughout   │
 life, we are reacting to the moment, the moment which was cast forth from our    │
 ancestors and the circumstances of the previous moment, which (being cast        │
 forth) travel from the previous moment here into the moment to define our        │
 circumstances which define our act                                               │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┴──────────┘

--- #172 fediverse/2424 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 if I don't take this job, then I'm going to be homeless.
 
 if I do, then I'll be moving to a different city.
 
 a city that I don't know.
 
 my upbringing tells me that this isn't a choice at all, but... 
 
 at least I have a place to keep my stuff. maybe I can find a different job.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #173 fediverse/3216 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 ┌─────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: mental-health-mentioned │
 └─────────────────────────────┘


 me: i write gud
 
 also me:
 
 "in the garden of even, where all populations were balanced, there was no need
 for hatred - why hate, when you know that bloodshed was surely not for sport?
 why hate, when your life was won or lost in proportion to the calculation that
 nature determined to be the result of your struggle, to determine which
 survivor was most fittest?"
 
 WHICH IS IT, HUH? you can do better, self, please be better, it's better to be
 better, you refuse to respect yourself and then you wonder why you feel so
 dejected and wretched.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #174 fediverse/2713 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────
 if you aren't organized enough to protect your commanders, then you don't
 deserve leaders.
 
 build the structure first. build it on honesty and trust and dedication toward
 a goal. then build the necessary adaptations as you encounter problems, trying
 vaguely to head in a particular direction, and eventually you'll become
 self-sustaining.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘

--- #175 fediverse_boost/4375 ---
◀─[BOOST]
  
  "It won't be so bad..." *rationalizations galore*                           
                                                                              
  "If only they'd listened to people like me when I said ..." (comforting righteousness)  
                                                                              
  "What more could I have done?"                                              
                                                                              
  "This only proves why I was right about ..." (more righteousness)           
                                                                              
  "I know nothing. I need to learn more. I must learn from this somehow."     
                                                                              
  "I am not surprised." With a thousand yard stare.                           
                                                                              
  "This can't be real, there is a conspiracy..." (this is a path to madness)   
                                                                              
  "Don't comply in advance." Said in a wavering shaky voice.                  
  
                                                            
 similar                        chronological                        different 
─▶

--- #176 fediverse/4540 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────
 most people in the world are dumb as a bag of bricks
 
 but that's okay, I still love them, and so should you.
 
 everyone I hang out with is sharp as a tack
 
 and I love them still, for I don't have a preference for blunt objects.
 
 some people don't feel emotions
 
 I think they're just depressed
 
 some people can't stop
 
 won't stop, I say.
 
 really as long as they follow their heart and sing a tune that is true
 
 I think they're alright.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘

--- #177 fediverse/6190 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
 the past is just as much a part of you as is the future. how much do you think
 of what lies beyond?
                                                           ─────┐
 similar                        chronological                        different═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────┘

--- #178 fediverse/549 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: pol-socialism    │
 └──────────────────────┘


 ngl I kinda want to see what conservatives would riot over in a socialist
 system. Like "oh no we have healthcare! that sucks, so I'm going to burn down
 a police station" like bro what your basic needs are met and you're encouraged
 and enabled to pursue your passions and personal desires, are you still hung
 up on that old capitalist stuff? get a life my guy that's soOoOoOo 21st
 century of you
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┘

--- #179 fediverse/5136 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 not really, I guess. Nobody will hire me because I don't really want to get
 hired. Sounds boring, doing the same thing every couple days. I'd rather stay
 at home in my [underwear/pajamas] and waste the day away with kittens and
 care. why? why? what are you doing? she asks. The less you can do, the more
 power will be granted to you. Save it for another time, when things actually
 matter.
 
 but today, does, matter, because today dictates your latters. Tomorrow is
 predicated. on today. and today is all that you have. [this paragraph in the
 style of alec baldwin]
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────┘

--- #180 fediverse/2991 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────
 okay so if yesterday was a
 
 "everything sucks and I'm the worst ever"
 
 type of day, and today is a
 
 "whatever mom I don't even care"
 
 type of day, that means tomorrow will be a
 
 "I can't believe how absolutely absurd I am"
 
 type of day, and the day after a
 
 "I am indomitable nothing can stop me"
 
 kind of day, with the following being wildcards
 
 ... right? here's hoping. I like that trajectory.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘

--- #181 fediverse/1157 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: personal-woe     │
 └──────────────────────┘


 oh no, apparently I'm gonna be forced to drop out of university again in 9
 days unless I do half a course and a final exam before then.
 
 Tell me again why I spent the last 6 months doing nothing? Oh yeah the mental
 illness, that's it. Yeesh you're such a drama queen, just do your work and
 you'll be good.
 
 what's that? intrusive thoughts time? Don't you mean "nap until they go away"
 time? oh yeah that's probably at least part of the problem with the whole
 "dropping out" thing.
 
 If only I didn't have the same reaction to "doing things I don't want to do"
 that most people have to "touching hot stoves", that'd be nice.
 
 my mother's voice ripples across space and time "you're such a smart boy, if
 you just apply yourself you can do anything! You can do anything you put your
 mind to. I believe in you and I love you." thanks mom
 
 brrrrr it's so cold here. wish I could afford to run the heater. - actually no
 I don't because it's not solar powered and I refuse to use fossil fuels if I
 have blankets >.>
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘

--- #182 fediverse/1971 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: drugs-mentioned-probably-delusional-psychosis-idk-though-i'm-not-a-doctor │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 listen, if you didn't want me to do a bunch of drugs then why would you
 consistently say "please stop doing drugs" every time I do drugs? And no I'm
 not hallucinating a voice in my head telling me "please stop doing drugs"
 because A. it's not a voice, I'm not hearing it with my hears, which means B.
 it's definitely just a hallucination, and hallucinations are always to be
 considered WRONG and BAD, right? Or was I not listening in therapy? Ah, well,
 better take another hit, where's my shotglass? Hmmmmm I should watch Adventure
 Time, that's a great show.
 
 [bro it's a saturday, why are you getting turnt like it's tuesday]
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘

--- #183 messages/169 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────
 Sorry for my behavior. I am an undiagnosed scizophrenic, so I'm wrestling with
 metaphorical demons. Sorry for attempting to interact with society, I get a
 little lonely sometimes.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent═════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┘

--- #184 fediverse/1010 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────
 I'm done trying to be neurotypical. So what if I starve.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘

--- #185 fediverse/4180 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────
 @user-1639 
 
 or nobody sees it, because you post the things you say on the internet in 2024
 which is so siloed and echo-chambered that the only people who hear it say
 "tru tho" and "she just like me fr" and never change because of your words
 
 ... wait that's just what you said, but made more specific, isn't it?
                                                           ┌───────────┐
 similar                        chronologicaldifferent══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘

--- #186 fediverse/3752 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────
 @user-1218 
 
 It's a person with a thumbs up who has a fountain of tears streaming down
 their cheeks. Any time you see the T.T fountain of tears emoticon you should
 view it as slightly sarcastic - they're not actually crying, it's more like a
 "ahhhhhh" type of thing instead of a "[cry cry cry]" forever type of thing.
 
 Oh also the z is them with their other hand on their hip all sassy like.
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--- #187 fediverse/1715 ---
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 @user-246 
 
 true, but what is a poem if not a silly construction of phrases? Those words
 don't belong together, what are you doing! And yet it fills you will a feeling
 that the author intended, thus being poetry as a joke.
 
 problem is if everyone says the same joke, it gets kinda... old... hence why
 you should express yourself as much as you can.
 
 I wonder if fewer people are "alternative" these days because they all started
 hanging out on the internet and trying to differentiate themselves amongst
 each other instead of amongst "normal people"? Weird thought, srry haha
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--- #188 fediverse/3881 ---
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 │ CW: mh~              │
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 wait wait wait, hold up.
 
 you're telling me your purpose in life is to be cool, chill, funny, cute, and
 or friendly to the people around you, and to just relax and enjoy life?
 
 wow that must be real fucking nice. I'm so damn jealous. Damn. Damnit. Fuck
 why am I so orthogonal. What's wrong with me?
 
 ... ah, well, nothing's wrong with me. Turns out what I do is for you, if only
 in spirit. Who are we? nothing! I barely know ya! But I'd do it for you,
 whatever it may be.
 
 ... Look, I don't need my legs, but also, I kinda like them?
 
 ... where was I? Oh yes this is why you don't invite a schizophrenic to a
 party. If you convince them that you're friends, they'll start developing
 parasocial relationships and you'll come to realize that their worlds are too
 vast for their own kind of potential.
 
 which is to say, you can hear me, you can like me, you can do as I say or do,
 but don't trust me, don't place your trust in me, because I am just a person.
 Don't trust people, trust organizations, to do as you expect.
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--- #189 fediverse/3718 ---
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 Real life is improv, but real life is not a skit.
 
 I am unwilling to give control of my life's scene to someone who won't tell me
 what they want to do with it.
 
 Even if I don't believe you, I'll still give it to you, but I will remain
 cautious and will abandon the scene if it appears that I can trust you to hurt
 me.
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--- #190 fediverse/1303 ---
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 @user-192 
 
 normality?
 
 banality?
 
 errrrr I mean emotional disregulation and low self esteem?
 
 ... it's easier in person when you can see when everyone has the "yo what the
 fuck" look on their face and when they have the "wait what was that I was
 thinking about snails" face
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--- #191 messages/765 ---
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 you don't have to write poetry to write notes. The poetics are just practice
 for when secrecy is intended.
 
 OR IS IT THE REAL THING? who can say.
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--- #192 fediverse/2100 ---
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 you're good enough
 
 your efforts are worth it
 
 you are valid
 
 you are loved
 
 trust yourself, be honest with others, and find reasons to be affectionate to
 others
 
 breathe in, breathe out, and remember: everybody poops. How absurd. How silly.
 Can you really take anyone seriously if you imagine them pooping? I know I
 can't. Maybe that's juvenile, but it works for me so
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--- #193 fediverse/1718 ---
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 dear old people - did you know computers don't need to have buttons? You can
 literally just type what you want to make happen (if you know the magic spell)
 and it'll just, do that thing
 
 how cool is that
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--- #194 fediverse/4014 ---
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 I don't know about you, but "trying my hardest" involves giving up sometimes.
 
 How else are you to know your limits if you don't test your boundaries? And,
 after finding that there's nowhere else for you to go, you turn around and
 "give up", until you're ready for your next expedition.
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--- #195 messages/555 ---
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 The biggest problem in my mind with socialism is that you could get all of the
 workers into a room before finding out that they don't like each other
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--- #196 fediverse/3286 ---
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 I hate how people think I'm mentally unhealthy.
 
 I'm fine. I love myself.
 
 [except all those times when you feel randomly suicidal for no reason at all.
 Are you being like... hit with microwaves or something???]
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--- #197 fediverse/4692 ---
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 what's that? a bunch of houses burnt down in california? what if we built a
 couple warehouses and stored all our trans girls in bunkbeds there, with rooms
 for LAN parties and snuggle parties in rooms full of stuffed buddies plushies
 with massive kitchens and sad ballpits where you can go to vent your feelings
 by writing on a ball with a sharpie and then when someone else is feeling sad
 they can come and read the balls and maybe feel something
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--- #198 fediverse/4025 ---
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 the "village idiot" doesn't need to lack smarts, so long as everyone else is
 in on it.
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--- #199 messages/98 ---
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 Your job should be a descriptor of what you're currently doing with your life.
 They shouldn't be gatekept - if you want to be a detective right now, we
 should help you. If you constantly switch jobs or only pursue them for your
 own benefit (hard to describe, ask for clarification if needed) then you
 should be paid less.
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--- #200 fediverse/2488 ---
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 I know how you might be feeling. If you haven't hear from someone you care
 about and it's eating you up inside, imagine them succeeding. helps me feel
 better.
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