=== ANCHOR POEM ===
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@user-95 did you get the instructions? Mine came in a dream, which sucks
because I only remember two or three of the rules. I think there were nine
total, and now I'm afraid to practice my non-programming spelling because I
don't want to violate causality or redefine temporality or something like
that. I guess now is as good an hour as any... Dear other witches, hear my
prayer, I'm kinda lonely and I only know a few spells, but I think that's good
enough for now.
Do you know any spells, prospective witch?
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=== SIMILARITY RANKED ===
--- #1 fediverse/6038 ---
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│ CW: spirituality-mentioned │
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my worst impulse is to sit around and do nothing when there could be weed that
I was smoking
gotta be ready in-case things go south... I'm a witch, after all. who better
to call to the spirits drawn to conflict and strife, bothing them and saying
"hey, pay attention to me and my life?"
it's not like time is wasted for them. they are an orientation, not a
lifeform. time is no consequence when they can be anywhere at once.
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--- #2 fediverse/548 ---
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I added a line to my .bashrc that cats out a random one of my notes every time
I open a terminal.
I keep reading things that I swear I didn't write, but feel right and true to
me in a way that could only imply that they came fully formed into my eyes
through the lines on my screen, cast upon the mirror panes of my hard disk
drive by the pounding of my keyboard as I once upon a time did cast a spell
upon my future.
It's pretty neat, but it speaks to a shadowed perspective that perhaps is
neither within nor without.
Side note, I think I've been possessed by a witch. But like... in a consensual
way. Like "Hey witch, wanna live? You can chill out with me." [ha that's one
way to look at it]
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--- #3 fediverse/2386 ---
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Tee, hee, look at me, I'm a witch who writes nothing but kookie-dookerie
I pee my pants and stare at trees, what's less harmful than little old me?
The best smokescreen I can think of is to be true to your heart, to be weak,
to be vulnerable. Then you get put on the "worry about later" list, and not
the other kind.
I never lie. When convinced I am wrong, I change my mind. I am always
listening, always ready to hear where I'm flawed. I do my best every day, and
that's enough for me.
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--- #4 fediverse/5446 ---
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│ CW: cannabis-mentioned │
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on one hand, "save your readings" said by a witch
on the other, "I gotta practice" said by me, a clearly non-addicted person
on the third, "I am compelled" said by me, a clearly non-possessed person
on the fourth, "It must enter this mortal realm" said by me, a clearly
rational person
on the fifth day of christmas my true love said to me "please stop you're
scaring me I can't help this awful vaguery who is in control?" said by a music
song
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--- #5 fediverse/762 ---
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I'm a good witch, which means I write poems and bake cookies. Okay usually I
make something more nutritious, like "melange". Also I'm good at listening to
people's problems and I always have a cup of tea ready for you when you walk
in the door.
bad witches are kinda evil. They're the type who curse animals with human
forms and enslave the fae by forcing them to work desk jobs and such. They
also propagate spores for poisonous mushrooms in the forest, the kind that
LOOK like they're edible but actually aren't.
but, as all things are defined in waves, so too are the patterns of witches -
for every bad witch, there's a good one just around the corner.
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--- #6 fediverse/2133 ---
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witches shouldn't be around kids alone for too long because they can teach
them strange things like "eat this apple" or "touch this sharp sewing needle
thimble thing" or "eeeheeeheee I'm a witch, I'm casting a spell on you, you're
not going to wake up until your true love kisses you!" then, when she's 18 or
whatever, when she was fated to meet her true love, he shows up. Because he's
destined FOR THAT TIME IN HER LIFESPAN, hence why he is
[magical-shared-reality-applicationed] to her. Or Heckedy Peg, that one was
always sooooo scary.
... anyway, bad witches will say rude things or painful things. Really, the kid
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--- #7 fediverse/5904 ---
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║ I'm a programmer, but I'm not great at writing code. I mostly use AI to │
║ generate it. │
║ │
║ The "artificial" in AI here refers to the extra levels of capability that are │
║ granted to me by the computer and it's software. I am artificially more │
║ productive because I am using the tools of big tech to create small things. I │
║ am artificially more capable, artificially more intelligent, but it's still my │
║ intelligence - the system would not be useful in someone else's hands. I built │
║ it myself, but I never have to write code myself. │
║ │
║ It's perfect for a witch. I call to the spirit of the machine and it figures │
║ out how to make it so. │
║ │
║ [someday, the wizards of ancient lore will be reading through the POSIX │
║ specification trying desperately to understand while the witches burn the │
║ world down in their lust for power and everyone cries and yearns for a better │
║ future where everything was just a bit harder but genies don't go back in │
║ bottles, cassandora and pandasandra cannot relinquish her charge and her │
║ curse.] │
║ │
║ I have a fun cackle~ │
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--- #8 fediverse/3218 ---
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│ CW: something-weird-I-wrote-last-week │
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"guys I'm cool why would you not invite me to your team"
I dunno. Don't know y'a. who're you again?
... I'm the one who writes poetry.
oh yeah! cool cool, yeah I knew a witch one time, she was really cool. Her
name
was Witz Drovalski. She told me all kinds of cool things about magic and
alchemy, but then she exploded in a fire that I started. Accidentally,
allegedly.
the reason lead is so poisonous is because it is the anti-magico-elemental
component. It kills the spirit in us with it's malevolent ways. that kind of
witch.
the cool kind, with fangs and hooked toes.
Peril be to their foes, for they are quite excellent at conjuring horrors for
their imagination. mwahahahahahahahahaha
oh wait that's self directed, isn't it?
hm. Well, terrors not that bad, it could be lust
... oh it's also lust. great.
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--- #9 fediverse/4047 ---
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│ CW: spirituality-mentioned │
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"I heard she was a witch but I've never seen a hat..."
"When you believe in god, you become inspired when you see or contribute to
things that are aligned with what it's followers believe that god is "all
about" - like if you're in ancient greece, and you worship ares, you're
probably gonna get pretty pumped up if there's an invading army on your
doorstep. Or if you're a christian and you see someone feeding the poor, or if
you're a buddhist and you see someone sitting on a rock in tune with nature,
that kind of thing.
The thing is, these days so many people are atheist. And they never get that
inspiration.
And worst still, there are some people called witches who aren't pagan, and
aren't from the various forms of witchery that we know. They claim to worship
"life, the universe, and the totality of all things" which is nice and all but
their moments of inspiration seem to come randomly, and nobody can quite
predict what they'll do or say next when they're in that state."
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--- #10 fediverse/1069 ---
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there was a time, when a university was tantamount to heresy
======================= stack overflow =====================
Magic Survival is the witchiest game I know of.
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--- #11 fediverse/1031 ---
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kinda funny how the people in my life won't let me, a witch, cast spells on
them. Like they doubt my intentions? ? ? and when they do they're just,
mentally eye-rolling all the time. How's a girl to get any practice if nobody
wants to be hypnotized >.>
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--- #12 fediverse/5951 ---
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"uh-oh, she's"
magic is easy. all you have to do is earnestly attempt to have a conversation
with whoever will listen. I like to sit on my bed and listen, by earnestly
allowing my thoughts to be guided by the wind.
open up your mind, release yourself from your senses, and who knows - maybe
someone will adjust your thinking flows. (thought patterns)
[all you gotta do is make the black market the regular market and suddenly
everything just flows]
huh weird idk where that came from, anyway
magic is easy, just represent yourself earnestly as you would if you were
presenting in court
you don't need witnesses... just argue your point without any lies and people
will generally believe you.
"yeah... sure thing buddy, we know how you pronounce "
omg I'm scary because I don't shower, I wear diapers, and I'm always often
smoking cannabis
"awww, some people wanted mao"
meow
what if... they could do that? insert magical genie witch whoa cute yeah I
believe you, sure
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--- #13 messages/131 ---
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Hello, I am a witch.
There's more than one kind of witch, but I promise that I'm the kind you'd
like to have around.
There's another kind, however, that is unlike me in kind but I think you'll
find is just as rare, and just as tempestuous.
I like to think I am good aligned, perhaps not "good" as in "capable" but
"good" as in "benevolent" and "perhaps" as in "unknowable" and "but" as in
"desired" and "desired" as in "what I work toward because it's the right thing
to do" and "work toward" as in "realized according to the effects of my
actions not just by my intentions"
The other kind of witch is the kind that hurts people.
There are many reasons why you might find yourself in the house of such a
witch, but all of them are caused by your desire. Take care in the house of a
witch such as this, and stay no longer than your time allows.
If you find what you're looking for, get out.
If you're almost out of time, get out.
If you lost something, find it, and then get out.
If you run out of time, and things start to "smear", yell out loud your social
security number. If someone's trying to save you, it'll help them know where
to put you when you are returned to your body.
I'm sorry to say, but if things start to smear then life will get a little bit
strange. Just a little. Much better to get out beforehand.
If you find yourself tempted while inside a witch's house, abandon what you
lost because regaining it comes with a cost.
If you lose sight of your friend, then when you see them again you cannot
trust that they are who they claim to be, not inside of the witch's house.
If you lose sight of your friend, trust that they will get out by their own
hand, and find what you want and go home.
Unless, of course, your heart is pure, and your friend is what you want back
in your life again. Then you will trend toward finding them yet again, so find
what you want and get out.
They will try to keep you there, through inaction and professed exhilaration,
but generally they'll do what you command. So take them and get out.
There are many reasons why you might find yourself on the path to a witch's
house, but none of them are to be repeated. It's more of a life event and less
of a venture, so take what you want and go forth.
If you find yourself in my house, take a cookie or a brownie, and please do
come again. The house of a witch such as mine is somewhere you'll probably
find that love and affection are fonder.
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--- #14 fediverse/4168 ---
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"have a good day" is so imperative. Like, what you expect me to do all the
work? Just because I'm a witch doesn't mean I can just magic you into having a
good day!
"have a good day" is better, but still it doesn't work if you don't expect it
to work. Spells aren't magic, after all, they're solely based on the victim uh
I mean target's intuitions.
"have a good day" is probably best for me, so I try to say that when I see
people. This way you don't get any [redacted]'s occurring, and you won't have
any trouble aligning the [redacted]. On the flip side, [redacted], so perhaps
it's better to just grin and bear it.
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--- #15 fediverse/3738 ---
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"girl why are you so negative"
uh, because I had been unmedicated for a long time and now that I am I can
probably be more positive. Though I do want to switch medications, this one
makes me feel like a muggle.
"no I said why are you so naked"
oh, because it's hot as heck!!
plus, I don't really care for the opinions of people who have nothing better
to do than peek at cute 30 year old witches skimping around their own house.
like... okay I rent an apartment, but my blinds are closed, and even if they
weren't you'd need binoculars to see into my apartment unless I'm like, right
up against the window, which... doesn't happen. Or if it's at night with the
lights on inside and not out, but I'm aware of that and I plan around it. I'm
not a... um, what's the opposite of voyeur?
"extortionist"
no that's when someone is really flexible. ah whatever. I got 162 characters
remaining but I think that's okay every once in a while, right? I mean it's
not like I have to use them all because of some divine mandate or
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--- #16 fediverse/711 ---
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║ ┌──────────────────────┐ │
║ │ CW: trans-witches │ │
║ └──────────────────────┘ │
║ │
║ │
║ they say witches are scary, and yeah they're not wrong │
║ │
║ but they also say witches are ugly, and I think they just didn't have kind │
║ words for trans people back then. │
║ │
║ I mean, I'm gorgeous and so are you. I've no warts, nor green skin, but I do │
║ grow hair in unbecoming places. Like the tip of my chinny-chin-chin, and also │
║ on top of my toes. │
║ │
║ they also say witches are magic, and I guess that's true (I suppose). I mean, │
║ I wear quite strange clothes, for a man at least. It's quite normal for a she, │
║ which is what I was meant to be, if only I was just born right. │
║ │
║ Alas, oh well, I'll just take a little green pill, and BAM suddenly I've got │
║ huge boobs. Okay they're not huge, they're pretty normal. But C is larger than │
║ zero. │
║ │
║ they also say that witches write spells, and I sure do love to program. With │
║ my most familiar cat (who often does sleep in my hat), I find myself yearning │
║ for nuance. │
║ │
║ Meh, it's late at night, I think I'll think not of the plight, and instead │
║ just will dream of defusals. I don't know~ │
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--- #17 messages/1469 ---
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I'm not JUST a child. I'm also an adult, and I'm also a witch and a judge and
a scholar and a wizard and a [well more of an arcanist actually] excuse me do
you mind yeah sure sure - and a... where was I? see this is why I don't like
distractions! okay it's alright just stay on track-course-target - right and
also a technician and a botanist and a logistician and a neuronomist and a
mesocyclocodone (I don't know what that means - I think they're referring to
when I journeyed to hel? most people never heard the whole story. In fact, I
never told it from start to finish. Does that mean I'm still there?) no silly
it means you are eternally ~~ consistently dreaming unawares. yep, I refuse to
lucid dream because I don't want to lose the capability to hear messages in my
dreams. Lucid? there's nothing to be seen.
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--- #18 fediverse/3683 ---
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│ CW: cursing-mentioned │
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"your hat makes you look like a fucking nazgul"
hell yeah it does. I'm a witch what the fuck did you think I was going for??
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--- #19 fediverse/721 ---
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│ CW: spirituality-and-homelands │
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Hello, I am a witch and this is my altar.
Here, I dream of a green USA.
covered by the branches,
my body decays into parts,
ready to join the next life that needs me.
[read the alt-text on the pictures, or listen to your screenreader for more
explanation]
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--- #20 messages/685 ---
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If someone calls you in the middle of the night asking to be let in because
they need a place to sleep, don't let them in! Unless you know them obvi but
someone you don't know trying to manipulate you like "please I need some
shelter" like, babe no, we need to know each other first, it's dark, I'm in my
pajamas, c'mon.
If it's below freezing then okay, maybe, but... They got themselves into that
situation
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