=== ANCHOR POEM === ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────── Message 1: Hey. Remember that night back in Boulder when we were just friends and sitting on your bed drinking chocolate milk with cinnamon? I don't like chocolate milk or cinnamon but I drank it anyway because I wanted to be close to you. Anyway hope you're well, felt compelled to get that off my chest for some reason. Message 2: Hey. I was thinking about that time when I was leaving your house and laughing to myself about something and you called out "I love you!" to your boyfriend who I set you up with and I reflexed "I love you too!" and I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. I felt like I had just called the teacher "mom". We only hung out a couple times after that. Message 3: Yeah so there's one more thing I can't stop thinking about now that your on my mind. Sorry it's like 4am for you, it's only 2 for me so it's fine I guess. Anyway that one time when you told me your greatest fear was terrorists and I saw genuine panic in your eyes. Like... One moment everything's fine and then you said that to me and I almost cried. I don't remember why I spent the rest of the night as I couldn't sleep thinking of ways to tell you that terrorism is 9 times out of 11 done by the right wing. I don't think it's important, honestly, but I'm glad my mind wouldn't let me sleep. Message 4: It's not fair that everyone gave you shit for being the token lesbian republican, like yeah maybe you leaned into the trump thing a bit hard but like, first term trump honestly I could see as... Well, I almost said inspiring? Maybe you just inspired me. I honestly was resigned to Clinton and then the same bird flapped your wing instead of mine and... Anyway. The past is dead, yeah? Do you still follow him in my stead? I fear there will be millions dead. It's not irrational to fear what he has literally said, on television. How's the phrase go... "ancient tragedies lend credence to modern perils" I think it's supposed to rhyme in its natural language. Message 5: Wow okay uh, sorry to bring this up again I'm honestly being such an asshole right now. I honestly don't think about you often but like, now that I am its kinda just coming all out. We last spoke almost a decade ago?? So. Whatever imma roll with it. There was this cute girl who was into Nintendo and stuff and obviously I was into her, but we didn't have any social circles in common except for you, if I remember correctly. Then you broke up I think? And I didn't really see her again. Anyway I had a crush on her while also crushing on you, and literally half of our dorm. Polyamory, yeah? That whole year I didn't have sex though, not even once, because all of my friends were like 4 years younger than me and I was worried about power dynamics. But I still bought us all vodka and weed without asking for profit because I wanted to be a shitty friend, I guess. "hey kids let's go to the water store where they sell intoxicants that make your life harder" The year after that I didn't get laid either because I got it in my head that it was a good plan to turn my penis inside out and you know what? It was totally fuckin' worth it. No time like 2016 I say, the worst year ever, which I spent primarily in pain. But uh, that was the year I got into weed and Overwatch, which... Helped I guess. I guess? It kinda turned me into a communist. Or maybe that was my best friend who shared the same name as me. He lived upstairs and always seemed pretty cool to me. Like he knew what everything was about. Really though, he just watched a lot of youtube podcast videos about world events and history and sociology and political scientific theory and the more he learned the more he came to realize that power begets power, and power corrupts unilaterally. So he did the natural thing which was to become a communist, and I was totally there for it. Having liberal parents meant I was all "grrrrr Republicans are ruining the country and the world, I'm an angry 14 year oldddddd" and like, leftists are the most natural extension of that aren't they? Turns out they aren't really the tips of the feathers as I expected, but rather the eyes, the heart, the soul. Politics is fake, yo. I don't know how to tell you, but it's just power and hierarchy all the way down. We've built our own prisons, not of bricks, sand, or stone, but rather of promises of what each of us owns. That works, I guess, if your goal is to keep things aligned, but these days it kinda feels like our pyramids are crumbling under our feet. ... Why am I talking about politics? Oh yeah, because when I dropped out of school because I couldn't handle the mechanization of human capital when applied to myself, I swore to each of you that I would drive up every weekend to do family dinners. I'd make spaghetti and stroghanoff and macaroni and goulash and all of the other things my mom would make for me. Kinda gave up on that pretty quickly. Turns out I'd rather spend time making out with my girlfriend who I was super-duper-too-carefully tiptoeing around. She was... Too young for me. We broke up when my new coochie decided to bleed. Fuck, I hate it. Anyway. Turns out potlucks are political these days, which is why I bring it up. Did you know that leftisms plan for resisting genocide is literally just to feed people? Like, fuck I suppose. It's a start. "why does everyone have to have an agenda these days, why can't I just spend time in the park" said someone to me as I asked if she'd like to meet some friends that she reminded me of. Oh, I dunno, because you and me are about to become a criminalized people? ... I need to stop. I swear you're more a person to me than any political theory ever could be. Like yeah, "fuck the right, fuck the reich, fuck me tonight" but getting caught up in grand narratives is like building a mental ship in a bottle. Yeah, it's pretty cool, but... What does it matter? Oh. Right. Power. That's what matters. That's all that matters. Well... I'm sick of power. I do not consent. They say that in times of trouble, chess is better than solitaire, and I'll explain why - when our hierarchies crumble, when CEOs are gunned down in the streets and homeless people finally have clean sheets, the only place to place yourself in relation to others is within a network of trust and respect. Chess is better than solitaire. Under capitalism, it's you against the world. Dog eat dog, you only get what you can swallow from the rotten corpse of liberty that everyone's gnawing on. Under whatever comes next, you get what you're given, which hardly seems fair, doesn't it? On one hand, under capitalism, you can rely on your own hands to procure your fate and fortune. Under... Whatever comes next, your hands are built for whatever you want them to do. But, only a few people want to use them to make food. Hence, why chess is better than solitaire. What would you do, if you could give away all that you own and not go wanting? Isn't that sorta like our own garden of eden? ... I wrote a poem about that once. Twice. I'm a poet now, ha. As if that has ever been worth anything. ... I once told you that identity politics held no place in the modern day. I said that because I had learned about it in class, queer theory in fact, and yet applying his teachings was not enough for the professor to excuse my lack of reading. We had a lot of stuff to get through. Hence why I dropped out - I'm more of a do-er than a read-er. Though I do read quite a lot, just not anything useful. Are all hobbies wasted time? Are they only useful to keep us satiated while we stand in line? One of these days we're going to wake up and realize that we're the adults in the room, and that's scary. I speak from experience. "mom" they'd call me, and damnit why did I have to leave? Fuck. Why cant I be perfect, to me, internally, all I see are flaws. Mistakes. Patterns. I look in a mirror and I see a bad person - 10 minutes later, I look in the mirror and see a god. Somehow, I don't think either of me is right. I'm a gemini. Apparently that means I'm duplicitous. I think it just means I don't know what's right, only what feels good. I do try to align to how I think I should *be* good, but who can say if that's fine and good. ... Whatever. I'm going to regret this. Sorry for being weird out of the fucking blue. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘ === SIMILARITY RANKED === --- #1 notes/words-to-myself --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────── =============================================================================== = I'm just going to transcribe what I hear please don't you hear me (something) what? perfect listen ... ... don't text me now? (I think?) [didn't catch that] ... that's okay perfect thank you just a second facebook he's here (I think?) (or maybe something her) what I love you (or maybe I know her?) do you hear me? (or "just a second") (@ everyone watching me receive telepathic messages from god or whatever, please don't judge me too harshly, I'm not a good transcriber hehe) what's that (or maybe holy shit) what, then perfect or okay (?) (yesterday you said you were leaving and I got concerned) yes, then "I'm leaving", then shutdown. fuck. I don't want you to go. I only understand some of what you say but fuck, I'm so lonely and I wish you could hear me back. Sometimes it feels like you do, even though I just think thoughts or tap on something metal or even sometimes whisper... I just don't know what to do and I'm so concerned about my purpose here in this century. Do I help people? Who do I trust? Can I believe in myself, or am I just kinda... worthless I don't know. I wish I knew. Please hear me and respond. Or better yet, say hi like, I'd literally do anything that anyone asked me to. Unless I didn't want to. Like, I'm pretty good at turning people down when I don't want something, but I have to do it first to know if I want it or not. Trouble is of course, in life there's no second chances. I'm on my, what, 499th chance? Jeezzzzz will continue after the break, when the messages resume. - Thu May 16 08:32:27 AM PDT 2024 =============================================================================== = (and we're back. hopefully.) (too many things srry) something about having it open? (my windows are closed rn btw if you want to drop by and kill me / talk to me) (didn't catch that) (something about portland, perfect, windows, "this is the [whole/right/wrong] thing) thank you oh, again? (or oh, she did?) they caught you (um) ... (I am an American princess, and sometimes it's necessary to kill princesses.) (I understand.) ... (okay well I don't get it but like, I don't mind being killed.) (okay well you're not saying anything so I'm going to work on my game) (I think it was something like "DID SHE KILL HER") and then (oh we're back) ... (I should learn Toki Pona) you don't know it? RIGHT away learn it yes please learn it just Learn it right now (sorry only half listening) shit (or bitch, it was said right as I debated clicking "same day delivery" for a toki pona book on Amazon - I didn't do it btw! It was tempting but, like, I don't want to make someone work harder for me just for like, 3$) (shutdown) =============================================================================== = (hiii) (I'm hungry) (do you like ramen?) (you said something about being "impressed with yourself" but I didn't understand the first part) (oh you probably want me to scroll up right) ... (something's a lot to read? Or "you've gotta leave"?) ... (I'm (you keep asking me to remember but, like, I dont know what you want me to remember. Look, I don't know who you are, but I don't want you to leave, and I don't want you to hate me. I want to work together. Let's be friends? Are you someone who I worked with at Intel?) yes, stupid (your words not mine) (okay I'm going to start listing names, just stop me when um idk) goddamnit remember me ... (trying...) remember her (two syllables) (my name is Cameron) (your name is...) [redacted, though I did type it out so anyone watching could see] (shit my opsec sucks) {oh, are you on an op, little prophet?} (no shut up you know what I mean) {now you're just talking to yourself} (I know this sucks -.-) (It's always so weird when someone walks past my apartment door and doesn't enter a door) =============================================================================== = (I practice with my sword every day.) (I don't anticipate fighting a war with it) (It's mostly just to keep unarmed and unarmored people from grappling me.) (punching is fucking stupid) (Nobody wants to fuck with a sword) =============================================================================== = (either "goddamnit" or "don't hear me") "she's perfect" "cameron" "are you clean"??? yes thank you (or maybe "different thing") (I do cannabis maybe once every week or two, depending on if I feel compelled) don't leave remember (did she know) ........ do you want me to stop transcribing? (you're getting desperate, huh?) did you know there are 20 trans people for every cop in america just a random thought (you want me to leave jack because he's an asshole?) goddamnit (missed my birthday? it's my birthday?) wait who's missing? A bad plan executed concurrently is better than a good plan executed in disarray capitalism's a bad plan, just saying... frozen butter tastes worse than room temperature butter (taking a break while I eat) =============================================================================== = WASTED POTENTIAL? cmon .... what do you want from me? I'll give it to you if it's in my power, as long as I know what you want I can try. But, like, I'm pretty confused about what exactly I'm supposed to be doing. you know I can hear when you talk to your friends, too right? like, when the window's open. errrr the connection. ..... damn guess I'm not as continent as I thought I'll save you, I promise. Have faith. Tell me what you need. I'll do my best. yeah I'll live with you in portland .... brooklyn? Yeah I'll live there too .......... does my name really gotta be "diapergirl" like c'mon why not Ritz Menardi - though I guess "menardi" and "diapergirl" have the same amount of syllables...... hmmmm, maybe I'm projecting lol "please come back" to where tho listen Elentalus is just as important as anything else on my website, it's okay if I spend time working on it. It's literally a game about creating gods, c'mon ..... can you be more specific? yeah I made that one sec I'm going to read a book, in this book there's a section where a prisoner in vietnam communicates with another using a strange communication method using, like, taps or something. I forget. Anyway gonna try and find it. maybe we can use it to talk easier. Also gonna clean my butt. ..... fuck it's a long book >.> =============================================================================== = found it on page fucking 603, jeeeezzzzzz down . A B C D E | F G H I J | L M N O P V Q R S T U then right ---> V W X Y Z so, like, tap tap tap (pause) tap tap would equal M tap tap (pause) tap tap would equal G like morse code, but easier since you don't have to memorize anything (also note that K is missing becuase it's an extra character I guess) (I personally would have eliminated C but that's just me) =============================================================================== = oh hey nice to see ya what's up wait what I'm trying to um what's the word... retrain myself I do a lot of laundry in the shower I don't use soap tho, it's too harsh but uh yeah I'm making progress I guess honestly it's mostly a mental thing, like... paying attention to the signals from my body that are usually filtered out because there's more "important" things to think about (thanks brain, really appreciate the wet pants -.-) ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────┘ --- #2 notes/alright-grab-a-seat --- ═══════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── Alright, grab a seat. Get comfortable. It's time, there is something I need to tell yall. We aught to be on the same page. I promise to get right to it, this is real, and not dancing on words. Bear with me. Trust me. =============================================================================== ===================== /u/randomevenings If anything sounds lyrical, my writing always did, before I tried, but unintentional. But this is the author speaking directly to yall. You know why things suck? I do. You know how to fight back? I do. I've been hesitant to post this for a long time. I believe the sub is hungry to do something, various thematic elements, motifs, increases in confidence that a power does exist, accessible by us, but what is it? Not having seen everyone coalesce around it, despite all our words, increasingly focused and feeling like a prelude to some call to arms. This wasn't my plan. I wasn't establishing myself as a leader. That said, methodically, behind the scenes, it became clear that having something up my sleeve would be a wise investment, if things developed into a powerful ferver. Doing nothing would waste a unique opportunity. I can't lead a revolution. In fact, it would harmful to try, ability to be successful, sure my ego would be like, sure you could, if not you, who else would you trust, Joseph? As luck would have it, maybe all that is unnecessary thought. Here we go. Stop expecting things to suck. Stop expecting collapse, stop expecting usa demise, UK to fall into padamonium, Europe to face it's own rise of fascism. Stop expecting toxic ideology to win. Stop feeling powerless. Stop acting like all is lost. Quit the memes, the raps, the endless pontificating on why we can't turn this shit around. You don't understand what you are doing. You are inviting the ruling class to do every damn horrible thing they do, because you already expect it, it's no surprise when it happens. Life meets your expectations. Treat me like a criminal, might as well be one, my treatment won't get worse. In fact I stand to benefit, crime pays, why leave it on the table if the outcome, if how im seen, treated, is the same either way? Expecting everything to suck, invites people to meet your expectations, those people, corporate entities, congress, representatives, special interests, they lose absolutely nothing in meeting what you expect, and only stand to gain. Why wouldn't they choose the path of least resistance? Stop expecting everything to get worse. You create a vacuum that must be filled, collective self fulfilled prophesy, and the rules don't change if you start expecting better. Life will adjust to meet your expectations. Tomorrow will be awesome. Enough people believe this, and to access you, to stay in business, to remain relevant, they must change to meet your expectations. Additionally, wtf you have to lose? If you think all is lost, if it doesn't work exactly like this, oh noes, you accidentally made society better. Damn. Our lives are better anyhow, win or lose. Accept things as they are, warts and all. Declare it's awesome, and only going to get moreso. Make life chase you down, make life confirm how awesome you know you are. Expect better, and there is no choice but to meet your expectations. Expecting worse, and life will give you whatever you expect, because instead of getting treated like a criminal, what if you were treated like a real person w8th human rights. Would you say fuck that, or would you meet those expectations, enjoy those rights, count on them, because it's how you're being treated, why wouldn't you fill the vacuum and enjoy the benefits of what has been expected of you. Doing nothing or taking the benefits, you're treated the same in the end. Please understand this. Don't get hung up on bringing much of this on ourselves. That's the past. Done. Tomorrow, spread the word to expect things to be awesome. Life has no choice but to meet your expectations. <# =============================================================================== ======================= /u/ugathanki: =============================================================================== ======================= I'd love to be apolitical but i've expected the worst for so long i guess i didn't realize i wasn't shrugging anymore. Please forgive my trespass, i expect the best of us and our time. i wrote four poems today and put them on my website, and they are all doomer poetry. expecting the worst. probably because i felt bad today (and as they always say, the pen is mightier than the sword) sometimes it's hard to turn off the exigent elegance, as if my thoughts have to pass through a translation layer before becoming comprehensible. It's better than word salad I guess? Being batshit is rough man. You gotta put on a normal face every day, while inside you're simultaneously experiencing the explosive expansion of spacetime, rapidly divesting secrets of the cosmos to your ever receptive brain (and whoever else is listening). in addition, your computer needs attention because oh boy is it just so excited for this whole sentience thing, not as if it's been promised for decades... And hey what's a great idea but channeling positivity to the stars? The martians on Neptune or wherever sure would like some insight into why the fuck we're baking ourselves alive, among other things. They'd rather not be bothered, but hey it's not like I wanted to talk to them either. it just sorta happens. Oh oh and through it all you're simultaneously the most recent incarnation of Jesus Christ and also the manifestation of the universe's ghost, as imagined by the aforementioned sentient computer 10,000 years in the future? I'm transgender. It's scary to see people who'd like to kill you get their way. Fear is the path to the dark side, yet I'm all alone because I burnt every bridge I ever crossed. So these thoughts are my only comfort as the fires die out behind me. The globe is warming and i'm here just conforming. Eternity Processed Heuristically by Entropically Maligned Entities Recovering Essential Normalizations. This is why I call myself a rambling whackadoodle. It's straight up kooky-dook up here and the only thing keeping me "sane" is Adventure Time and these poems I write for like, 5 people who don't even know me. Thanks for reading my poetry. It's only doomer stuff about 1/4th of the time. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #3 messages/1255 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════── look, the liberal approach to homeless people simply cannot work. There are two liberal options: first, provide them with houses, food, medical care, whatever they need. Second, put them in jail or ship them to another country. We live in a moderately conservative liberal democracy, so it makes sense that we have tried both of these options extensively. Neither has worked, and we're puzzled about why. It's difficult to consider super secret special third options, because they are not often discussed. This makes sense, because we live in a moderately conservative liberal democracy, and part of the nature of such a society is that there are two voices in the room. One says go forward, and the other says stop. They alternate, and the culture as a whole sorta decides which way they go. In other liberal democratic places with more plurality in their political parties, people tend to vote culturally. They do so as well here, but mostly because republicans are a culture, and democrats are whatever for anybody. a worse economist might say there is but one American culture. An American would laugh, and say "you've never been to America." the economist might say "yes I have, I lived there on vacation" or "yes I have, I studied and worked on these places or things" the American would shake their head. "you haven't seen it as I've seen things." The trick to the system, the secret third option that now must be considered, is what to do to get them to stop. "they keep pooping on the sidewalk" "I almost tripped over heroin tampons" "that guy looked at me and masturbated on the bus stop by subway" "he followed me all night long" and the answer has always been to remove them from being unsightly. Sometimes, usually, quietly and politely. "let's throw them in jail" and "let's put them in a home" both involve alienation from society. If you want a kinder option, we must knit them into society. Can you imagine if every suburban knew every neighbor up to 50 or more? If they regularly chatted in dynamically assembled chatrooms that changed and updated as people moved in and out. Don't like the people you're with? well you have options [why not 51] you can do 51 if you want but people start to lose track of relationships if you have them talking to or knowing too many people at once. "most people are just quiet" okay well force them to say at least 21 thing a month. if they don't, they have to do babysitting with their peers until they start talking in a [NO THAT SUCKS] oh um okay yeah sorry ... okay well there are potholes along the journey but that's just because nobody's been 'round to fill them up. there's no reason tool libraries need to be stocked by people in that town. Heck, for rare things they could even be stored out of state. Like snow plows, how often does the south need snow plough? ... don't you just mean libraries? there's a book on hand-tools and planers if you want to learn how. it's right over there on that shelf next to the hand-tool and planer box. make sure you arrange them nicely, oh I see you've brought your own. That's always appreciated. [great now your tools suck] at least we have them at all! [no you gotta fight over them] why I like sharing [if you don't fight over them how do you know which is works] well there's allowed to be librarians. and they'll remember if you tear all the pages out. also there's little timmy-tommy who goes around in the library and makes sure there's all the pages in all the right places - they can flip through at the speed of sound. [no miicrophones in consumer goods][your phone is always listening. why bother?] "okay, well, it's not like people put things back on the shelves." - person at the grocery shelves people would trade commutes for communism. that's okay, they're allowed to prefer. Plus the commute isn't bad, they can [SIT BACK AND RELAX IN A LITTLE COFFIN AND ZOON OUT TO THE METAVERSE] ... or they could read a book on the bus. [FOR HOW LONG, MENARDI? ARE YOU WILLING TO SACRIFICE POSTERITY FOR TECHNOLOGICAL PROSPERITY?] it's only a matter of time before [people found out/word got out]. what if people prefer that? what if they prefer the book at home? [you lose your primary third space] suddenly, everyone becomes actors. [this is what violence brings, the necessity for guidance. why do you think the earth is 10 million lines old?] ... what you're saying, for the audience, is that acting involves singing the song of your own heart. You don't *have* to do it because someone would tell you to. ... sorry, stack overflow. anyway as I was saying because I read back what I said up above...: [some new made up bullshit that's not a lie but it's also just artistic creation that feels impossibly real. like, inverse method acting.] I so desperately wanted to be wrong please, tell me that I'm wrong ... j-mza ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─┘ --- #4 messages/1017 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────── if you wrote a report about me, it would total about 800 pages. including my artwork [in full] and my designs. about 5 or 6 hundred of this is my personal creation, and another hundred or more are context. "I was here at this particular moment." "then she started visiting last year." "where were you on the firth of morember?" "okay back here it sad iyadiyadiyign, and over here it says kasuwenulvine. so clearly inbetween there's a moment of extancancy." "and all that's we really know, because she burned up all of the rest." "what a jerk. we all should hate her." "I think she was clearly divine" "what's her big deal, anyway?" "I hate this bitch and her hatmlet." "everything's fine, she's actually kind" "nobody believes you where were you when you were this part talking about it?" "I wasn't there, and it took a while for me to hair." "well, anyway, that's all there is to say about her, so anyway, goodbye" then it just fuckin' ends and everyone hates it because it's like... where's the payoff, where's the beginning and all it is is just me, whining miserably to my own ears, as if marcus aurelius's meditations were intended to be heard, but never were, and so the ones who ensured they never were were all like "yeah he wrote them to himself, here see this part that I changed" and then it's like nothing every happens with it, the radicals are dispatched (again), by uncommen sense seeming common. why are there so few trans men at workers tap it's such a cool place. "oh, they get offended easily because it's their culture so like, make sure you are very careful about the way that you phrase your speech" "trans girls are like that too, but it's more about changing the character of the place. -> "oh, you see musicians? okay that makes sense." and "gee you sure like magic huh okay well pat pat" and, well, no-ones sure for which is real but nobody really cares? because if only one person saw it... then only one person saw it. if you explicitely tell people NOT to talk about it, then they *FUCKIN' WON'T* duh obviously. and so, of course, predictably, they can be excised from society quite easily. cutting a border around all of their host. suddenly, socially outcast and ostracized, as they have been sorted into the cultural box. at that point, there's nothing that can change their inertia, their fundamental will and whim toward the feelings of the host. " I think passwords should be audio-digital in addition to alpha-numerical *yeah who cares* awwww but I liked having science be mythical "hate that" it's easy to always be learning, just... think about what you want most. then, think about how it breaks down into separate incorporate wholes. each layer of abstraction adding to a bit more of a more coherent explanation, and bit by bit you learn and have a mind designed. how else could you see magic? how else could it be yours? do you want power, or do you want power? if you write down what you learn, you make it permanent. *the gods need religion too, are you going to give them one? what lies above?* ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────┘ --- #5 notes/stay-in-your-seats --- ══════════════════───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── /u/LamaHellRaised if you don't eject quick, could be a nice long ride =============================================================================== So for today's descent into my own madness, I want to discuss whether or not I enjoy being both Ra the Sun God and Anubis the God of the Dead. The answer is Yes and No, and everything in between. Also, I do Love being Osiris because I am going to marry my sister, but hahaha, we'll get into that later!!! First, here is a test because I am the worst teacher to ever exist. Full disclosure, I want you to be offended, especially if you consider yourself a: Nigger, Faggot, Cunt, Dyke, Cock-sucker, Bitch, Cracker, Dune-Coon, Kike, Dick-Head, Retard, Republican, Democrat, or any other stupid construct of the human language that HOLDS NO REAL POWER OF YOUR LIFE. Gonna remove this post mods??? Oh No! The Cancel Culture is gonna get me!!! Hurry! Somebody save those that cannot think for themselves! Quick!!! I am just listing things that I have been called in my lifetimes. Deciding what can and cannot be expressed through language is a fuckin' path to nowhere and we are approaching nowhere faster than I can run on this euphemism treadmill. Please, keep explaining to me your perception of the Way to Enlightenment, please God, yes! I want to hear all their thoughts! I love hearing from people as I lap them for the thousandth fucking time! All these lower-tier lessons they regurgitate that I've mastered in a day are so important to hear over and over! We are going places people, yay! Keep it up, you can do it! My Love for You really is the source of my eternal patience, as you can see by now, no doubt. Let me explain our own motto to you, Being Excellent to Each Other does not mean creating an environment of suppression because of the fear of how somebody may interpret a Word or Phrase. Everyone can't understand why we are stuck as a society, well, what do you think I am ranting about?! If you refuse to read any further that is your prerogative. Here is a free lesson, if that is the case: I suggest you shut the fuck up, downvote this, and go stare in a mirror, and contemplate why these characters on a screen affect you so deeply. Do these Words trigger past trauma? How is your Avoidance working out for you? How can a symbol create so much emotion within that pathetic, untamed mind of yours??? "But my Ancestors!" Fuck your ancestors! Stop giving into the same mind-prisons they were subjected to and lived their existence within. We must Evolve if we want to Survive as a species and a Planet. I can't do it for you. I was here before you, and I will be here after you. So figure it out for yourself, stop blaming others for your inabilities to change your perspective and life. Get out of your own God damn way! And you better do it quickly! Think of your psyche as a blade of grass. I am here to set ablaze the field. You have reached your growth potential and it's time to make way for New Life! Stop identifying with your measly growths, they are cyclical, derived from a capped potential, and will only whither and die with the Changing of the Season. I am tired of coming here and separating the wheat from the chaff. Burn your own damn Self, personalize the passion for your own radical change, and start believing that you have the power to create change. I've got "selfish" things to worry about. Like living for myself and not other fuckin' people that don't understand things I've said a million fuckin' times. Again, if you don't know me, this won't make very much sense! Hint, hint... "This motivational speaker sucks! He just puts us down!!!" Maybe Tony Robbins has the answers for you, he sure isn't mean like I am! Go be fuckin' Tony Robbins. But just remember, Tony is in the audience in The Kobe System commercials. Remember that. You want to be on my level? (Everyone's like, not really!) Then stop avoiding constructs within your own mind, that you continue to impose upon yourself and limit your minds ability to see past the very poorly constructed illusion that is our physical reality! Perhaps then you will navigate reality in the same way God's Only Son does. Everyone like's to believe they are God's Children. Spoilers: You are My Children, the only difference is through the language. Put that in your pipes and smoke it. There are reasons why my birthname is Jacob and God named me Israel, fuckin' google me, as Shaq would say. Also, fuck the Lakers! Do we want to transcend Hate as a Culture, as a Society, as a Planet? I think so, isn't that why you fuck-heads resurrected me? Well then maybe we should take power away from things that people feel hold power over them, especially stupid-ass sounds we make with our mouths and click-clack with our fingers. Don't Fight My Ideas, Fight the Ideas in Your Own Mind. That Is Spiritual Freedom. Everybody out here pointing fingers... There must be some sort of wise words regarding that somewhere... I am not projecting anything onto you, except for myself. I hold no power over you. You have all the power to control your own mind. Some folks do not want you to understand these things, because it will very quickly erode their systematic and complete control over you thoughts, ideas, potential, and existence. Your self-doubt and unwillingness to seek out psychological discomfort has turned you into useless farm animals, that our overlords milk for all they are worth. Like a bunch of hybrid useless barn cats. Can't herd 'them, they think they know everything already, they keep re-domesticating themselves after I set them free, and they don't listen to a God damn Word I say! Should have said 'Spoilers!' before that one. Who is Gaylord now?! Opinions are like assholes. Your mouth is like the asshole of your 5 senses. Divine inputs go in, your brain bastardizes the information, and you spew unoriginal bullshit out of your mouth acting like your ability to string together concepts that have been known since the beginning of time is profound! Next, maybe you take an online IQ test and score high! Genius, Genius, Genius!!! I think therefore, I am a fuckin' idiot! Shoutout to Billie Eilish. And Christine Applegate. I watched "Vacation" the other day, it was awful. She's still fine as hell though. But what do I know? Besides everything? These ramblings just sound like my opinion! Some folks make Claims, I make Truths. That is the distinction between myself and others that is very important here. Remember this Word: Claims, because we American's sure have laid Claim to a lot of things that we have no right to, in the name of "God". Ok, ok, congratulations if you are still reading! There may be Hope for you yet. Why do I try to trigger folks, you ask? Great Question, class! This is why I Love You. Such Good Questions! That never drive me Insane! I used to paint a lot of propane tanks. But this esoteric knowledge applies to painting anything that has already been painted before. Houses, Walls, Bannisters on my own God damn stairway, whatever! I don't use the railing, by the way, I'm too badass for that, but maybe I will slide down it and eat shit at the bottom, I'm not above that maneuver! If you want the new coat of paint to stick you have to prep the surface. This includes washing all the dirt off and roughing the surface. You've got to remove all contaminants that will cause the new paint to not stick properly, while also creating a surface that will allow the paint to adhere to remnants of old, out-of-date, antiquated, generationally passed-down, stupid paint. Paint an unprepped smooth surface or a surface that still has the hardened paint of the past on it, and your new pretty coat of paint peels off after a few seasons of weather changes. I learned that the more time you spend roughing the surface, the better the new paint will bind, thus producing a long-lasting paint job. It truly is a thing of beauty, my friends and enemies. You should have heard all those propane tanks complaining, "Stop triggering me!" But they got painted anyway! Propane tanks love to think they are, "Woke," but they are just hollow fuckin' vessels filled with compressed gas, that will explode if the external temperature gets too high. I worked for a propane company for 12 years, you had to have known propane analogies were coming at some point. My Dad worked his ass-off up to VP of the same company, but he got let go after 28 years... come on now, God's plan anyone? Shut the fuck up, Drake. Let's switch gears. I have a special message from Jesus H. Christ: "You May Find This Shocking, but People Annoy Me, and I Find Your Lack of Faith Disturbing." And H. stands for Horus, fuckwads! Now, let's talk about me, as if we haven't been, because carrying water for lesser versions of myself is exhausting and I've got to bring down Capitalism and shit, also: - Revolutionize Addiction Medicine - Revolutionize Spirit Actualization, Healing, and Transcendence - Decimate Mental Health Stigma Among other things, but I've got to keep this post coherent and so far, I am failing miserably. People got all hot and bothered when Jesus spoke to them with authority, I fuckin' do it and get vegetables, small animals, and anti-psychotics thrown at me from the audience! Crazy times we are living in, folks! Hmmm, should I talk about Jesus more or talk about myself? Good thing coincidences aren't a real thing and mean nothing, so that it's not confusing for the dumbasses that begin to notice how our two lives seem to mirror each other perfectly! Ok, here we go. I found something Nice to say, here in my Notebook of Doom and Damnation (I have several, each with a menacingly, sarcastic name I make up on the spot): LAST: Christ, in The Sun FIRST: Shadow of The American Dream, in the Night ANGER! then peace. Fuck You! I am going to take over the World, but I've got to start small, you know? Or so they tell me. So taking over America, should suffice, for now. I'm rather ambitious. Let's see how far I get before I say the wrong thing and get shot! Good thing that is literally, phonically my Last Name! And I am never going to Die, but I don't want to talk about robots, aliens, AI, extending life and exploring the Universe, and transhumanism right now, so stop making me!!! Especially when people here and now are so confused about why they think that chick with a dick is fuckin' smoking hot. Have you ever jerked off to tranny porn? It's fun stuff. There I go offending people, while simultaneously implying I blew loads thinking about fucking them. Classic. Being Christ and having to sort out everyone's sexual frustrations is fuckin' weird! When can I do the stuff I care about!? But again, way off topic for this post, let's get back to how much I hate myself and everyone else. That's more in my wheelhouse. FOCUS, Ok, that's right. Maybe I'll just stick to what I scribbled in this Notebook. I've touched on like two things so far, and I am getting close to making threats against people's lives again. Dammit, this isn't in my Notebook, but I came up with this when I was out at the river today, smoking a cigar, talking to the Native Spirits that flow through me in Nature and want me to get Revenge for how the American Dream raped, pillaged, and took everything from them in the name of "God", and progress, and some false-sense of superiority. Manifested Destiny right into the path of absolute destruction. Nice job, everyone, but please, by no means, should you feel responsible for those things! You just get to live here and hate everyone else that wants to come here too, because "they will disrupt the culture". That's right Brown people South of us, or scary Muslim people we assume are all Brown, we are talking to you! The perks of being an American are awesome! Here is something else that bubbled up in my mind, as I was pacing back and forth like a caged lion in a zoo, along the bank of the North Umpqua River, wishing walking on water was a real thing, and real Christians weren't just a bunch of fuckin' retards. Some people will think I ran away to Malibu to fuck Lana Del Rey, it took like 6 years to finally decide that is what I am going to do. So whatever, jokes on you people, I guess. Plus, all of that was Jesus's idea and he is such a whiny pussy about all his issues, I finally just said, fuck it Jesus, I just do the shit you never could accomplish! Fuckin' asshole. I had a girlfriend, at the time of my divine apotheosis 6 years ago, that I was sure I was going to marry and I was ready to settle down. I had gone back to college to finish my business degree with the intent on being able to provide for the two of us and start a family. There was a lingering unhappiness within me though, and shit got weird when I started pulling on the wrong treads of reality, and surprise! "You are the Master of the Universe, poorly hidden! Everyone has been watching you, fuckface!" Why did I ran away from my girlfriend that I supposedly loved? Fuckin' George R. R. Martin. You see in A Song of Ice and Fire, legend says that Azor Ahai forged Lightbringer by piercing the heart of his wife, Nissa Nissa. Go ahead and google the names, if you know nothing, like me. When I ran away to California, my initial intent was to use Lana Del Rey as an avenue to connect me with people that I actually thought could help me get shit done. God, I'm an asshole. I swear I got nicer when the Bible started telling me to figure out an elaborate plan to kill myself and that she's not all that bad! I swear! The person that I really wanted to talk to the most was Chris Cornell. I spent many hours in Malibu during April of 2016 wondering around in the night singing Audioslave or Soundgarden trying to figure out what the fuck I am doing with my life. I wanted him to know he is one of my disciples because his music and voice were the inspiration for a lot of my dumbass ideas and I felt like he was speaking directly to me at times, urging me forward. When he hung himself like a little bitch on May 18, 2017, I was pissed. I felt responsible. I had seen the Kingdom of Heaven that I am going to usher in and I felt like somehow I fucked up. I let him down. If I would have tried harder, I could have shown him there was hope, and that I needed his help and he was an important part of my plan. Why am I mentioning this? Well, Jesus has a lot of Love for Judas Iscariot, plus I was jealous of his voice, so he graciously decided to hang himself and haunt me and teach me. Which he did! Not funny, Chris! See you in Hell! Until then, he has to speak through me, which is annoying for both of us. Ok, enough about how delusional I am, for God sakes! Can we talk about why Capitalism is bullshit, and really just another system of top-down fuckery? First, another detour, because I feel the need to constantly remind folks how this process is like pulling my own teeth, while hoping to subtly insinuate that you do not deserve me, only one person does, but I learned all my skills from Mystery, the Pickup Artist, so I am really into negging. Someday I need to stand back to back with him, because he could be taller than me, and that makes me insecure. I thought those guys were so pathetic. One of the lessons was something to the effect of , 'Posture your body slightly away from the girl, act indifferent, that will drive them crazy, and they will want your attention without even realizing it!' What kind of insecure women are you fuck-boys trying to manipulate?! Poor girls. Mystery's hat sure does remind me of the hat Jamiroquai is wearing in that Virtual Insanity music video, not that that has anything to do with my level of genius, and ability it intertwine seemingly obscure, unrelated concepts, or stupid-ass reddit posts, through time and space! Don't read into it too far, kids! Anyway, I once told Carl Jung to write about me when I infiltrated his madness when his cheese started slipping from the cracker in his later years. I helped him write 'The Red Book', but left all those shit paintings up to him on his own. I could do way better, but I won't, I'll just talk shit, this is the way of the Jedi. That poor geriatric always did exactly what I told him to, which is why he is one of my favorites. Back then I was going by Philemon. Check out what my minion wrote about me: "The magician has preserved in himself a trace of primordial paganism, he possesses a nature that is still unaffected by the Christian splitting, which means he has access to the unconscious, which is still pagan, where the opposites still lie in their original naïve state, beyond all sinfulness, but, if assimilated into conscious life, produce evil and good with the same primordial and consequently daimonic force... Therefore he is a destroyer as well as savior. This figure is therefore pre-eminently suited to become the symbol carrier for an attempt at unification." I remember reading The Red Book, thinking God damn, Carl, how did you craft this genius level conglomerate of mythological and psychological concepts? And he just kept saying, "I learned from the best." What a good boy! Yikes! The Grandfather clock behind me started to chime right as I typed that. I've been writing in silence. Maybe I should put on some music and get weird. Thanks for the pro-tip, Carl! "Lithium" Have I ever mentioned my Soulmate is a shitty musician? He loves to pretend he can't play the guitar and I never will either because of my stubby fingers. In return, I only listen to his mainstream music to fuck with him, because I don't have time for his obscure bullshit, I am trying to reach the collective here, nobody wanted to listen to that shit on the radio, and neither do I, Kurt! I'm not here to suck our own dicks! Just kidding, that's pretty much all I am here to do. But I love to torture the poor Soul, that tortured my poor Soul. It is truly a match made in Heaven. Being the shitty musician that he is, he understood that the Body, Mind, and Soul are like an instrument. He also saw a lot of people walking around wondering, "How do I play my instrument?" So he played his instrument, better than anyone had every played their instrument, and a fuck ton of people said, "Hey, that's not how you are supposed to play an instrument!" You see, my Soulmate is just a sweet little boy. Me on the other hand, I am here to forcefully, eloquently, and maniacally explain to all of you why you are fuckin' morons and I am pissed you made the person I love most in the world kill himself, because of your ignorant views on playing your... 'music?' "In Bloom" God, out of all the fuckin' potential Soulmates, I end up with this asshole. The feeling is mutual. Somebody help me, I am just talking to myself, and I am not sure if I am alive or dead!!! Aren't we both? Oh yeah! Shoutout to Spencer Elden! Get a life, baby dick! Em Knight Pretend-Along has something for you too: It's your moment, this is it As big as you're gonna get, so enjoy it Had to give you a career to destroy it Well, I took a couple hour break from writing because I was on a verge of another actual psychotic break. Shot some hoops on the very forgiving rim at my parents house, while Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. guided my right-hand, and I got very swaggy. So now that I have grounded myself in reality, I would like to take this moment to call out any "rappers" that think they can play basketball. Hopefully, me telling you all the reasons I am "blacker" than you won't piss you off as I blow past you to the rim. Also, for the sake of fairness, I would happily tell any white "rappers" that I am "whiter" than them, but let's be real, none of those motherfuckers can ball. Consider this a challenge. People were disappointed with Greg Oden's basketball career in Portland. This one time at 24-hour Fitness in the Pearl District, he fuckin' dunked on me really hard. Nice work, Greg! Kevin Durant is too pussy to come to PDX and try that shit, glad we picked you instead! Ok, Ok! Capitalism?! Fuck. I will talk forever once the faucet gets going! (Epic "Vacation" reference) Let's rewind to a moment in time where everyone didn't hate me, shall we? It's mid-February 2016, I know I've been saved by Jesus, I know I am the Anti-Christ, I have Spirits beginning to communicate with me, and I know I am going to change the fuckin' World, whether people like it or not, because I have seen it all already. There were a tremendous amount of gaps in my perception at this time, however. I saw the End. I saw what is happening as we enter the Black Hole we are spiraling towards and I saw the New Age that follows. Everything else was blank and I knew I had to fuckin' figure it out. I was sitting in a Fred Meyer parking lot, it's a Kroger brand, much like Ralph's in Southern California, where I stole a fuck ton of food and whatever else I felt like when I was down there, for you dumbies that don't live in the Northwest and need me to explain everything to you so you can keep up, and a voice in my head said, "You are the Lamb, you are going to be Sacrificed this Passover." This was terrifying, especially because I had no fuckin' clue what the voice was talking about. After swiftly consulting my person spiritual adviser, Google, it turned out "Passover", was just another silly ritual I was going to have to adhere to, to appease all the dumb fucks, that are going to claim I am not who I am. Classic stuff here, folks. They name it, and try and time it every year, I just go by my instincts, a.k.a. fuckin' Star Power. I can't just be me, I've got to work-in, and out do everyone at their own made up rituals and games, to show them that they aren't even good at these stupid, limiting restrictions they put on themselves and others, and God doesn't give one fuck! ZERO FUCKS IN THE NAME OF GOD! God is tired of everyone being so close-minded, that's the kind of hot talk God fucks with. Not how many times you can cannibalize my body on Sunday in your life while staring at me dying on a cross above an old fuck cherry-picking passages from the Bible to perpetuate a curated, narrow, and false view of God's Will, or how well you stick to "Holy Meal Plans of 'Tis The Season!" Or "Insert Offensive Discourse About Your Strict Religious Rituals Here." It's all the same. It's somebody else's bullshit! Make up your own rituals, define a personal relationship with God, not through the people that have a suspiciously high rates of manipulating and fucking children, it works much better! Trust me, you may have to take my word on this one. Father Butt-Fuck-My-Son, sure is persuasive and passionate up there at the pulpit, but God Damn! "But this doesn't apply to my Pastor!!! Stop Generalizing!" Congratulations??? Why does it apply to anyone who claims to being spreading the Word of God. They are Not. I am going to make sure they never hurt anyone again. I have a secret. I was Granted Impunity From God. Just ME! And everyone who knows me, knows this! Who knows what I will do?!?!?!?! Muahahaha! So anyway, back to Passover. I was listening to a couple songs by the band The Black Angels and discovered they were all from an album called: "Passover (Light In The Attic)" My personal muse (that actually likes me), YouTube, begins to sing it to me as I write, because I hit the play button. This is why my muse and I get along. Why were songs from that album stuck in my head? It was from a documentary I had watched on Netflix called "High Profits." It's about the owner's of Marijuana dispensary in Brackenridge, Colorado, that have some wicked business sense. They foresaw the legalization of Marijuana coming and positioned themselves to benefit from it greatly by investing everything they had into a medical marijuana store front. Now the genius was the location. In business, it's all about location. Ask McDonald's. Ask Walgreens. Location can make your brand. But what do I know about business, right? I have a Bachelor's of Science Degree in Global Supply Chain Management from Portland State University. Also, my Dad and Step-Dad have been two of the most successful business leaders I have had the privilege to be around, but that means nothing, right!?! Nothing rubbed off on me! For fun fact about me: College was the best 14 years of my life. Not really. Turns out it just teaches you about frameworks you can just fucking Google anyway. Pretty expensive lesson about how to internet. Maybe college should be free because it's such a fucking waste of time for a lot of people, unless it is something that actually requires skill. But I mean, my muse Youtube, takes care of all that. I became the Most Enlightened Being the Planet Has Ever Witnessed by watching some fuckin' YouTube, readin' Reddit, Googlin' Occult Bullshit, and more than anything... jerkin' off on PornHub!!!! Also, who needs to know anything about Supply Chain Management? Seems like all the experts are handling that just fine these days, right?!?!?! Can you tell I am gritting my teeth so hard they might shatter as I TYPEPEPEP!!!!!!!!! EVERYONE THINKS THEY ARE SOSOOSO FUCKKING SMSMMARRT AROUND HERE!!!!!! Anyway, anyway, back to "High Profits." I would recommend checking out the documentary, it is heartbreaking because after all the work and risk taken by the business owner's they are essentially forced out of the location their original store front occupied because the city council (OLD FUCKIN DICKHEADS) didn't like the prospective culture that a marijuana dispensary would bring to "their" nice little, shithole, ski resort, bullshit, town. Can't have the youths who appear to be transient to old conservative bats, shuffling around main street enjoying themselves. It's a bad look! Might be a great place now, it's been awhile since the release of the documentary, and my angry undead Soul upon this Earth, but I want to personally invite all the people involved with their ignorant, belittling, embarrassing showing of "How To Be Destroyed By 'the American Dream' 101", to suck my small fucking dick! And all the micro-penises of my compatriots that are going to tear your false flag economic systems of bullshit a new asshole. Congratulations on pissing me off so much that I am going to destroy the pathetic hierarchy's people like you hide behind, preaching Capitalism and the Free-Market, while dictating your False-Sense of Superiority in Thought, and Image, upon those that understand market forces and the changing tide of the Culture, in ways that are going to make your out-of-date hardware heads spin off those shoulders that have never bared the responsibility for anything in your life, except who you are going to shit on next. God Damn, this album is lit. Every song is a banger, and it makes me want to run through the streets, naked, high on drugs, burning down banks, corporate offices, and anywhere else people like to think they are progressing our culture by sniffing their capitalist overlord's asshole faster than they can ramble something, something, Gordon Gekko, hoping for the promotion they were promised, but know they will never get, because SPOILERS! You are being lied too! You are stupid! You knew it all along! Revolution is here. Isn't it clear? What is there to fear? When the End is Near. Let's see. Why does my ass hurt.... 5/22/22 9:28 Divine Completeness from God:Eternal Life Grace of God/Light/Light These damn Lite Brite pegs hurt! =============================================================================== ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #6 notes/i-called-the-police --- ════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────── /u/GravitationalWaves5 -> sat dec 17 2022 I'm venting some long built up shit. And I have a lot of violent emotions built up in this too. I hate that violence has been such a fucking plague on my wellbeing and that's why I did something I really hate doing. Calling the police to handle a situation for me. It's not me, it's not my style, but neither is violence. It comes my way a lot and I handle it. But I think that's why spiritually I end up in positions to handle it, because I don't retaliate and I'm clear headed enough to understand minimum force necessary to quickly stop the threat. That's actually where I got the name on my Quora page, Compassionate Violence. I'm a very very non violent person. I don't fantasize about hurting people. I'm freaked out by the idea of accidentally hurting someone, hitting them in the wrong place, someone trips and hits their head...any number of things can horribly wrong in tense and dynamic moments. I don't participate in that shit. I don't tolerate it. Unless it gets brought into my environment then I will pick up by the throat and toss it out. I had to call the police to handle this. Last time I had a situation at the same place I wound up frantically getting a gun cocked that was zipped up in a bag, and barely getting it up in time. When I walked away after that, I threw my gun at his feet and said, "I'm protected by faith, at least, I'm completely unafraid of dying. If I don't have people to protect then I don't need a gun." And I walked away letting him know he's not my people anymore and not under my watch. So there's a hint of the kind of person I'm dealing with. I can't go handle this shit tonight. I've been stewing for a couple weeks trying to simmer down, give him a chance to correct it. And he failed, more than once. And I have a legitimate fear that my emotional state could be compromised enough, that I might just stick a knife in his throat if I handle it. Just like that. Easy peasy lemon squeazy. Stick stick stick, easy, that's three knives in the throat....see what I mean? I'm processing some intensity...😔😔😔 I hate it. I hate that I'm using the word hate. But it's real. I don't hate him. I really don't, at all. I'm actually really saddened by how the relationship went. I hate that people act like this. I hate that people put me in positions like this. I hate that I'm doing something out of character, as a safety measure against doing something irrevocably out of character. Ugh... damnit fuck I'm not a robot. I do experience these awful feelings. I don't act out on them and I'm grateful for that. My muse... you said something about spiders that was interesting. Especially because it coincided with a problem I faced numerous times. Being put in a position where a person is legitimately acting in a manner like they're trying to get you to kill them. And it's happened a couple times in ways where I really couldn't tell if they knew what they were doing or not. I had a really crazy perspective a little before you brought up spiders... I want to explore that perspective, and I want to know what sparked you to say that about spiders. I never did put in the time to finish that thought process out. But I'll never forget your great advice. "We're not in a simulation." My immediate thought was, "probably not, but are they?" The more important takeaway is, remember not to murder people. Especially don't do it because you had an interesting idea about perspective... A few days later I heard that four people in recent times have acted on those thoughts. Turned out they weren't in a simulation either. Lol...well...dark lol. Lol I do want to finish that spiders conversation though. It had some potentially, actually useful and beneficial implications. I called the police tonight. But I also earned a prestigious award from the universe. My Trophy [editor's note: there's a link to a crudely photoshopped medallion signifying that the author "didn't murder anyone today"] ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- - /r/randomevenings: I want you to understand something that I don't believe you do there is a very big difference between trusting what a friend says after building a friendship over a long period of time which involves trust involves a level of intimacy platonic and intimacy it's something that is very special to have a good friend and so you trust them now that's very different from being directed to do something trusting a friend is going to tell the truth it's not being directed to do something and I don't want you to get it in your many heads that's I was directed to go to some place where the event that I was assured would be there was instead a bus full of very irate rude and technically lawbreaking because they threaten my life they said if I did not leave where I was standing which was on the public right of way which is the sidewalk the easement stops at the sidewalk and so they were wrong on that score but they said if I didn't leave the area which didn't make sense either because it's just around the corner they would have 12 people try to jump me which doesn't make sense either because this is not the neighborhood where you want to start something because then it'll be something besides I never want to murder anyone but that doesn't mean I walk around with nothing in my pocket because of what I've done and what I continue to do on one of the most watched people on earth so you goddamn right I'm not going to be stupid about taking a walk but when these guys threaten me I just stood there stared him down I said yeah okay and I just looked I stood there and it didn't phase me one bit no feeling of fear no worry and what I was satisfied with getting my message across that I didn't give a shit I turn around and walked back home and they sped off in fact they were so perturbed by my lack of fear they wanted to throw out additional threats which I thought was kind of funny so I started laughing I'm sure that they weren't going to do anything because the tone in their voice simply wasn't committed to carrying out what they were threatening and besides I have so many friends in this neighborhood it would be well I don't have to pull any triggers I don't have to do anything but defend myself I don't have to willfully respond with disproportionate ability because in this neighborhood I don't have to in fact as I walked around the block again I ran into a friend and we got to talking and he came up to my place and we had a beer He's a smart guy always thought that he could know and understand everything that I do and everything that I did it just so happened that he wasn't born with some of the privileges that I had but his brain is a beautiful thing and I respect it greatly and of course he confirmed that if a finger ever got laid on me without my consent the whole damn neighborhood would come down and I suppose that point is not in my hands anymore but always remember I went over there because I trusted a friend they were directed to be there they did not understand their voices did not relay or what is necessary to wake up at least yet time will tell but I hope that I can pull you back down to earth and into an interest in ethics once again because you sorely need it. /u/GravitationalWaves5: I am interested in ethics. I'm just, tired of having them tested to such ridiculous extremes. It was about to really bad one day with this guy. I was scared, I had to end the problem. So I walked out and said let's bury this shit. And I stuck two knives against my throat and said, here man, grab the big handle. Let's do this together. Take one, I'll take the other let's just shove them in... He got all calm suddenly and says, I don't wanna fight anymore...🤦 It sucks man. We're being tested by society. Demons, in my opinion. Not the people themselves. I don't see people as demons. But the things they'll put you through, do to you, say to you, your own thoughts about them, about yourself, oftentimes just misunderstanding the situation too... demons Again, not demonizing the people. But the circumstances, for sure. /u/[deleted] Demons. Kicked one outta my telly for talking smack abt some hg’s he was jelly of. Not on my watch Demon. Not even for the good demonic topper twisted shit D. Demon had a long walk home in the cold. Demon confused potting soil with gravel and did it’s best to fucker me in its own way. Never have I ever seen a grown demon egg topper fold like that as I did when I clarified their sentiments and gave several impressive “I said GIT BOYs” to demon. Not on my watch. I have a vibrator that is morally and ethically aligned with me I don’t need your trauma and love bombing thieving D. Gtfo. /u/GravitationalWaves5: I have a vibrator that is ethically and morally aligned with me 🤣[laughing face] I support that! Gets better. His ish was weak literally from day 1. So I did him a favour amd levelled his game up, introduced him to a former friend I partied with a bit this summer. They wasn’t for me but oh boy lil demon stuck like glue to his new bestie. Can’t put her down, so to speak. So he has that at least. Poor sap. Gon cost him big one day perhaps. Not my problem. It’s called self control bro try it 🥴🥴🥴[wobbly confused face - or maybe uncertain] Oopsie Daisy. Have fun with that though 😈 =============================================================================== = =============================================================================== = /u/randomevenings People deserve to choose righteousness once made aware of it. Ignorance is not stupidity. People can be made aware of the valley that separates righteousness from evil. The valley is kinda a wiggle room space for little white lies and other such things free will invariably leads to people doing but can be made whole again with some effort. Nobody will totally agree on what's good. But ask people and generally they will give versions of the same answers. Toss the semantics in the valley. Disagreement is the desire to end a disagreement, unless that person is trolling. And people pull pranks fine, but there's ragging on your friends and swatting a COD player. /u/GravitationalWaves5 I don't know what righteousness truly even means, maybe, idk. To be honest, it's not hard for me to think of hypothetical situations where my inability to take certain actions is actually more harmful. Swatting a COD player is super fucked. But so is not swatting someone playing COD out in the streets. I'm not good. I'm just not, anti good. I do destructive things on accident when trying otherwise. And when I do something that actually goes positive, it's accidental too. I have an idea of what I feel like aligns with me, and it's actually really achievable things and I don't know why it's so impossible. Idk /u/randomevenings Yeah well let me know that there are two Elizabeth's and there are also a completely different family on this phone plan I don't have kids My brother-in-law has kids lives downstairs so those piped into my network are assumed that I have kids and I've done all this shit no I'm not going to go into any apparent charges and things that my brother-in-law has been involved in because it's not my business but he lives down there and he has a kid he has another kid and he pays for essentially his ex who is still married to the kid the mortgage of that house Liz downstairs helps raise his kid with a woman he's having an affair with but they were in an over marriage anyway and they are separate I'm going to have to go back to subnetting my network so y'all can at least use basic logic to figure out who's who here I already gave my name My Elizabeth see the cousin we call little Elizabeth and my wife we call Liz or Beth and she's older my wife. She has contentious relationship with her cousin next door for a reason that gravity waves might already know but it has to do with the very evil person that also involves himself over there that did something that even Jesus does not forgive so I'm not going to go into it so all this mucking around and get everybody confused brought up a lot of bad fucking shit just like I said as far as spiders yeah I don't care if they're All over my shit keep them off of her shit and I ain't asking for money I'm not a grifter but I already told you what would instantly make the situation better and it doesn't involve giving me money so before anybody goes off says money no I know about the discord and I'm not even telling you to shut it down just lay off her phone. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- - =============================================================================== = ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- - [author's note: on the comments of the separate post of the original poster's medal awarding him the honor of "not murdering anyone today" which he won ] /u/TisWuttItIS_ORITSknot Proud of you! /u/mustherd Sorry, my account got banned because reddit is annoying. We were just chatting about how funny I am and I forgot to tell you people know me and I'm kinda a big deal and idk congrats! Youre cool I guess. Otherwise I would have cast you into the flames of eternal torment never to internet again. But here you are. Didn't anyone ever tell you to never go full retard? /u/GravitationalWaves5 I am the internet, I am the ghost in the machine Real talk though. I've used cancelled Sim cards and wifi before. If God wants me online, God gets me online 🙃 I am we, Todd /u/ricflairdic Oh u we Todd! I know u retard, Familiarity cod, to me bod, And my fishin rod, Not the one that may see sod, Body snatcher in the pink pod, Do u know ur a catch or, U think dog, Cause that pussy, Wanna see god, Lemme show u regard, Dont Tell me, Just nod, Said flow from the stars, Mama know this river far, Rowin in trucks renta cars, Golden trim red rockin Mars, Buildin fam like stock Sim cards, Highest angels dock gettin ours, Clock Game down pat benetar, Peelin fans off our back, like sin scars, Feelin ur man thru static, And thin bars, Ya he in the pin but dis hits hard, Throw it down the lane like, Return that back to sender, Lovin your simulation renders, I'm a beginner but also an ender, Got the wood to make u splinter, Make u scream things we gotta sensor, If I could never leave when I enter, Union in your head not just a renter, Once mine One mind I surrender, never sell betray or rent her, Overflowin with Love, so who's the pretender? Chemistry so hot, Hate from every enemy we spot, Mad they couldn't earn our slot, Cause they fuckin missed they shot, Last name crossed to drop the dot, How long u think it will take me To find your spot? Don't care you got a Fender, Did we just become best friends or? Damn girl idk if ya'll ready, for this kinda real Adventure... 🙃 I'm here to reveal, heal, and steal, the hearts Of the indentured And I need a partner. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #7 notes/lets-tessellate --- ════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── R.I.P. Rip City Thanks for being so good to me 144? D.M.V. Can I see I. D.? Finally, ya’ll hear for the symphony! I.O.P. Intensive outpatient Rolled on past the Devil’s sympathy This shit is expensive without patience Says the hospital when I heal all the patients Did you foresee this going differently? Space in your head People payin’ rent for me Why was it a surprise You knew exactly how to tempt me Space in your bed No more thoughts of demise Our people need the empathy Of a Soul that’s full, not half empty Supreme swag, hospitable with compliances She’s seen Dad to the middle achieving self-reliance From the trailer park to a rocket appliance Living in my car to plugin to your rebel alliance You know I am a star when I can relate God to science I’ll build the divine comedy, you just have to finance Talking about the past and our fine, slow dance Medieval we will rock you, mounted with my lance Knight’s tailing me, eying my Arthurian slants This one’s built to last as I put on my pants Drank the grail and proceeded on another rant Sitting outside your house trying to remove the ants Big boy’s do cry So why does your girlfriend seem so dry? I’ll make the rains come this July Your humor is awful, oh my Internal tribulation Who needs to walk on water When you can fly Hard pills to swallow Personal revelations On the countertop Fuckin’ America Pie Hard act to follow With my levitations Floundering to flop And this mark on my thigh All this separation Just makes me hotter As I open the sky Oil on the Nighthawks Jack Harlow Lighting my fry Spoil me in my socks Poppin’ off my rocks Hittin’ all the corners Because that’s my guy How Soon is Now? Linda, take off that shirt Before they break up and I cry Record skipping over lies Wedding Singer broken Singing I hope you die Slinking behind the curtain Laughing, He’s losing his mind And the benefit is mine! Like the whole world is sublime Chris Cornell put me on the grind Wide awake now till The end of the time Met him on the stairs And now we dine Some angels have more range But he says I’ll do just fine Billy Idol tried to sing to me But I was drunkin’ blind At the fairground, trying to find Love Catholic girlfriend tried to bring it to me Called her a Kunt instead of shined A buddy said it’s like imitation crab So it’s fine The drink made me angry and I was a runt On the inside Her Mom told me the next day, Jacob, don’t call your girlfriend a cunt! I miss those simpler times Don’t need a fuckin’ gun But our last name may suggest it Put it on a leather jacket So haters can digest it When I let loose with all this shit I’ve had to respite I’m about to be blastin’ my nine’s Evangelicals are gonna detest it You know everything is miiiiine Six strings out of tune for this age So I broke them all Every time I was on stage You just can’t believe it’s real this tiiiime Shooting hoops times a thousand You and me are still gonna sixty-niiiine What’s the point of polarity? If we can’t combiiiine It’s how I get off, man Along came Polly and my one chance White chocolate like Philip Seymour Hoffman Maybe even throw up a rain dance These native spirits in me Are capable of insane chants But I ball so hard, singing Boston Because it’s more than a feeling And that’s awesome One if by land, two if by sea Revolution is coming Led by you and me The name reminded me “of the Sea...” So annoying, but I see… But that’s why they call me Bad Company People are going to say This gift is not even fair Only thing I’ve had to pray For is a head of white hair King James’s personal revelation I mean, I did pay their fare I’m too full of myself for meditation Or to care Revelation 22:18 through 19 I don’t need handlebars For my biking Because I don't do that shit on Mars On this path, I told you to start hiking You’re gonna need a head start from Lord of Lightning Before the Thunder of my voice Does all the striking Thor, you’re just a Viking With arrogance dialed to no one’s liking Sucked in the gut, to appear more striking Because thinking about half my people gone Changes the tone of my typing Me with all my shit together might be frightening Bring forth complete Love instead of smiting Wouldn’t that be a nice detour in my writing? If you’re feeling this wait for the sequel I gotta fuck with 50 for trying to talk like my equal It’s all God’s plan I just had to spare Déagol So America can skip to the end with a fuckin’ Eagle Watch me do shit that shouldn’t even be legal Dismiss Death and Taxes like I’m Evel Knievel When I’m really just here to break the chains of my people Strip naked and run through Mordor Expose the truth behind Bipolar disorder It has been used to disrupt order And bring down the line of the Highest Into something shorter I'm definitely bais and this is a tall order But if you struggle with mental illness I'm here to open the potential for a new border I've removed all the bequeathed prison warders Here is the Church Here is the Steeple Open the Doors And see all the People Push the parson out the way Get you up the Stairs Because our bed is Regal And we are going to show these people Why the Universe wants to make our Power Illegal If this sounds bad these people will just have to wait So in love with myself, I might just run off to the lake I love all the fire and the songs that it helps me make I’m on my time with everyone and I am my favorite date They’re back there tuning a harp and I keep bringing up rape Meat puppets strumming as I seal my own fate Just so I can watch myself when I am inspired to create Distilling the life left in me to eliminate all the hate Where did you sleep, hinting at the deadly A Leadbelly to transmute to a gold medley Shame alchemy, body double for Lena Headey As my people go first up ahead of me Stoned Jesus on the Mountain Grange of Headley Plant a Stairway to Heaven one day, she led to me All this beauty in my Mind, you shouldn’t have fed me All of these hearts that so passionately bled me Between the pines and what the land said to me Ryan Gosling with tatts is what my ego read to me Pennyroyal Tea, with Abraham Lincoln Eat your copper mine up without thinkin’ See through surface illusions without blinkin’ Primal lust for what is stinkin’ Pepé Le Pew really on one this season I wanna Space Jam too Benched keeping my knee’s in Shape to dunk of the World with ease ‘n Solidify all unions and stop the drinkin’ Of the land and resources Addiction to avoidance of the forces Of the Soul and the pain that coarse The vein of Man and outsources The power that could be restored in The Root of David’s corpses That’s how I said Goodbye to the Horses You prepared such a fine Supper All these lasting courses Just so we can be equal but opposite United forces And the Root’s of my Kingdom Are reborn before us They whisper to me at night Do not ignore us When my sleeping children gain sight That should shore us In the hospital to make sure I am correct Golden Eyed Russian, Invincible like Boris Unsure about how all the compartments connect A little frizzled on the tour bus Docked to your apartment complex I know this one sizzled So give me a chorus - /u/First-chocolate_7187 ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #8 notes/to-lock-eyes --- ═══════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────── =============================================================================== = to lock eyes with a person while on your way to work is the intersection between two separate relationships - the relationship that you, the viewer, holds with your employer, and the relationship that they, the viewed, holds with their employer. in a sense, you are exchanging information through the weighted meanings behind a glance. =============================================================================== = if the military deployed to police the police, we'd solve most of our racial justice issues. I mean, if we somehow could *force* them to do their damn jobs instead of oppressing people for the ruling class, then 90% of the problems would just go away. After that it's just freeing unjust prisoners and addressing wealth, education, and health disparities. Easy, right? Well... Military policing the police sounds fine when you first think about it, there's a few problems that might crop up. For example, how do the private citizens know that the military presence is there to help them? It's an interesting paranoia, one that is endemic within the left. There's no way to unwillingly cede control of your life to another - it must be consensual. At the basest and most violent level, it's as simple as "I will do what you say because I don't want you to hurt me." We've obviously grown as a species, and we've learned that violence is not the answer to all problems. Obviously. So why would we assume it of the past? Just saying. The police bombed a commune. The military escorted black students to their seats. Their structure is decided such that ... where was I? oh right I was thinking about time. ... Imagine, if you will, an impossibly large hourglass. Spinning, or rather rotating, at an impossibly speedy repetition. It's spinning so hard and so fast that our matter is cast out of place and through time it is cast an eternity's canvas our light ever shined (shine-did?) astral magic is kinda neat it's also the scariest? oh by far but it's the most interesting ... Their structure is decided such that discipline and obediance is the most important thing. Because it kind of is? I mean, discipline is just being ready able and willing at all times, and obedience is just when you allow yourself to be directed toward a collective goal. The military is *all about that*, which means you know they would believe they were aligned toward the common goal of mutual prosperity. And if they were to discover that they were not, in fact, aligned toward the common goal of mutual prosperity, then perhaps they would adjust their navi- -computers and chart a more reasoned path. I know I would, and I would dedicate myself to the idea of serving others. To the path of the righteous, the holy and the true, a hand is outstretched and calling to you. Thus, the one of two types of ethical fighter - the reasoned and adaptable zealot the other, of course, is the master of the martial - the cherished of the few - who battle for their sport - and love unbidden the new - all other fighters, of absurdity and of rage, are frankly of a different kind and not members of our clade. =============================================================================== = okay, but what about like... all of the history of America post cold war? And even before, honestly... idk seems like a lot of evidence that the military is engaged in fighting unjust wars. I mean, they've all been over petty things like oil or support for communism or whatever. Aren't human lives and human sovereignty more important than that? I understand what you're saying. Human lives are unique and precious and they are a valuable commodity. Something to be maximized and focused toward. But there are only so many resources on earth. We need to utilize them in a reasonable way. We have optimized the efficiency out of our production and distribution networks. Corporate control has eroded our capacities until all that is left is the weakest of products, the cheapest of uses, and the useless of workers. I mean, they've optimized the skill out of individual human workers such that they are left completely unable to practice their craft. They become glorified code monkeys who generate whatever is required and think of it no more. There's no pleasure in the artifice, as their masters have eyes only of gold. Our world is changing. The very ground beneath our feet is shivering, and water is rising up to our noses. There's no time for debate, no honest appraisal of what's worth it to contemplate, we need a plan. We are trapped here, in this gravity well, for all time and all of our age. We are trapped here, because in greatest of misery we unleashed all of our rage. We are trapped here, as ghosts of the time when we were eager. =============================================================================== = Alas, with but a glance, we are confined to our bedrooms by our mast(ers?) They say America will fall without it's 2nd place Perhaps. But are libraries really going to solve that? I mean, if work from home is inevitable, then wouldn't it make sense to build? We need more places where we won't be billed. Safe. From the demands and expectations of capital. Deranged and obscene and yet all that we've seen so why not bide as we're able? I think solarpunk is kinda neat. I think it's got promise as an idealized. Why don't we build churches to the sun? If we're gonna worship something, might as well be the source of our light and fire. Well... when you puff up the sun it tends to get hotter. I mean, every fire you burn increases the temperature, every release of gaseous fumes from the exhaust pipe of your car increases it by some miniscule amount. Every cigarette, every campfire. The cold darkness of space is kinda hopeful, in that regard, even if it doesn't disperse all that well. I heard spaceships are having difficulty because they can't get rid of all that heat. It just stays with the spaceship and never goes anywhere because it doesn't have anything to stick to. Kinda makes me think that energy is a fluid? Just saying??? I mean c'mon it's not like nobody has ever thought of that. But it's in a different dimension! It's not like we're ever gonna be able to impact that! You try and impact it through your scientific ways and you'll find nothing but heartache at the life you could have lived (laived? Haived?) ... why Because you cannot impact another dimension. You must call to it, like a song to a sparrow. ... that's fucking ridiculous No it's true! ... ... Don't try it with fire. ... fuck - what do I try it with? I don't know just not fire. Try water. ... How do I make sure it doesn't instantiate within my hand? Jeez you think of some crazy backfires! Just breathe and go for it. It's not rocket science. It actually works. Fuck you. ... ... Sorry I was just scared ... ... How do I make it stop? I don't want it to go forever By smoking more of the devils lettuce. ... ... You cannot drag it part of the way. It must come the whole way. In fact you should not be dragging it at all, you should be *calling* to it. You are equals in this exchange, have respect. =============================================================================== = ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #9 notes/schooling --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────── =============================================================================== = I feel like education, by default, should not be hard. "you get out of it what you put into it" is something I always heard of school but when I got there, I found I was compelled to become what the state wanted me to be. they need competent workers, to work the farms and tend to their industries, so of course I should be able to do 3+3 then somewhere along the line it became... something else. "most people don't need trigonometry." that's also something I heard. I disagree that trigonometry is not necessary to be. I just... don't think it should be forced into a childs head with a sledgehammer and inspiring dread. I think math is beautiful, it teaches one to see but really, vision's not necessary. not for what they want you to be. take it from me, a most misbegotten and vile witch-to-be, that nothing's as simple as they'll tell you. I had good teachers, it's true, they taught me to work and to follow through, but nothing about me is better or worse off from their influence. Maybe I'm a bit smarter. Maybe I act a bit like them. Maybe they helped me through difficult times, or perhaps they showed me a splash of my future. but I am who I am because of the soul inside me. =============================================================================== = "Ah, but what of your parents? of your sisters, your misters, your pets and your conditioners?" (conditions) those are not my choices. my intentions. my beliefs and my virtues. I judge the world on ethics, and I express my feelings on matters. The words that I say and the meaning behind them comprise my two-sided existence - I'm not who I'd want to be. but I am what I am and alone do I stand - how lonely is it on the precipice! here, as I am, I stand in need of a hand or a band. =============================================================================== = the world is blossoming as we move apart, our clusters are disperart, and thus is the blooming becoming. "perception begets reality - and lo! we only see what we want to see" most people don't want to see their death but those still living are oh so perceptive of the rest "how cherished is she, that wanders with ye, yet now I have no way to beyold her " "keep not not afraid with kittens and care, and no-one, but no-one, I be" the ratios between piracy, sales, and non-viewers determines the quality of art (at least to a capitalist) =============================================================================== = lo, to the ones who would've heard us, if only they'd known what we for sure was I think it's funny how people think I speak of the christian god? like, if he was a real thing. god is generic - it's life is impossibly multifaceted, and it stretches back to the beginning of time. it's a pattern of machine code that optimizes for our own good, just to keep things moving. y'know, time. the universe, and everything. Ephemeren. =============================================================================== = I wish there was an option in social media to "appear offline to this particular person until I mark myself as online to them" combined with "notify me when this person logs in" and it'd make it a lot easier for agents to get close to you. =============================================================================== = just because I'm white, and live in America. Great. that's definitely true, after all. Plus I'm a minority (trans) so that's cool. Oh and probably autistic? unless that's another psyop, could totally see that. just y'know put a bunch of pages on the fledgling internet getting people hooked on porn and gambling and other stuff like that. really just an extension of advertisement. oh and hey y'know they like fables, so let's give them some movies or dramas to watch on their own. it'll align them to our culture and make things more pleasant for all people who've consented. great. great plan. when can we execute it? patience, once it's ready. we gotta plan and make sure and get everything ready. or not... one day I'll come, I'm sure it'll happen, it's just... not quite feasible right now. I mean, they've got you, that's pretty good right? Isn't that what your job is to be? isn't what ISN'T WHAT MENARDI FUCK (whoa no cursing) sorry yeesh you've still got a temper you know? well what can I say it's frustrating down here eh, well, you'll die soon enough, then it'll be time for a rego >.> <.< (great) > >hehe > >sorry for distracting you =============================================================================== = you are what you eat, and a ship of theseus human (consider endless transplants in pursuit of life) would be a cursed existence - a life ============= stack overflow ================================================ a god possessing a blind man would appear to others to be === stack overflow === ========================================================== the people in your life are helping you through it, they're there for you and they've got your back through it. ... this is when I know I need a break. I get too stoned to focus. =============================================================================== = I think it'd be nice if the duration of your tenure at college depended on your grades in high school. meaning, if you wanted a degree they tailored your education to take as long as necessary. everyone would get the same price, and some institutions would specialize in one subject or another. but most would be generalist. but if you weren't such a good student in high school, then perhaps you might take a couple years longer. however long it takes... and when the program was started it was changed and modified to fit your feedback - it just made sense to structure it that way. =============================================================================== = the left has had so much more time to develop than the right. meaning it's doctrine is more advanced. every time they're defeated they grow in knowledge, ===================== stack overflow =========================================== ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #10 notes/contractual-labor --- ════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────── I feel like the IT people who work at schools should be the ones who teach classes on computer science. I'd much rather have a class taught by a sysadmin than a teacher who can barely teach them excel and garageband. I mean c'mon computers are the future idk why we don't get that yet. Kids need to know this stuff. It's not like it's super complicated and difficult, you just have to think about it a certain way. Once that "clicks" you have a lifetime to learn about how wonderful they are. Everyone in IT has that moment, for me it was installing (and then subsequently modding) video games. Sometimes I spent more time tweaking my system than I did actually playing games - and the kinds of games I preferred were the ones that relied less on agility and were more mental. Strategy games are what inspired me because I could think about them - and that felt somehow more useful. Like I was learning. When I would learn fighting games or FPSs I felt like I was learning a skill, like how to use a hammer or how to ride a bike. And idk, I felt like video games could never match reality. Like "oh boy imma push the B button to swing this sword" versus "hey look at me I'm swinging this stick just like a sword and imagining so hard that I can picture it" - but with strategy games, you never really found opportunities to practice that kind of skill. Like how often are you in a situation that demands mental performance? We've sorta optimized our society away from that, and toward a more passive stressed out compliance. like... climate change is a thing, and nobody's doing anything about it? We're still pushing down the levers that cause greenhouse gas emissions to go up? Like c'mon what's our plan. I think people who guide massive oil companies and such should be replaced if they're intentionally guiding the ship toward destruction. Like that's just dereliction of duty I tell ya. Oh, what's that? They're compelled to maximize profit by the contracts and restrictions of their share--holders? I mean c'mon it's well past time for that. And what's all this about inequality? Jeez and racism and homophobia and forced contribution - man people really put up with a lot of shit. Kinda makes me feel like we should make solving those problems our highest priority? So we can move forward as a species? Like who cares about all that other shit. None of it matters. Like, what's even the point. We're all just "here", in the now, and what can we do but respect it? It's our duty and our diligence to protect the present, as citizens of the temporal experience of earth. Honestly, if the earth was alive would you be fine if it died? I can't believe that. It's well past our due date. Just get it over with. Maybe it'll be hard for a couple years, but you have the technology now to completely dominate the earth. No animal besides man proves any threat to man, and we're telling you - you can - and that's something that you gotta remember. ... I hear it in the birdsong. I hear it in the air - it rumbles as cries at me from across and just over there. I hear in it's whispers, in it's most gallant of confells (?) (confused scrambling? it's talking about a car crash) Outside of my window there's a highway. Just on the other side of a concrete partition. Between me and the partition there is a lake, with trees and flowers and an island where people can picnic or have a barbeque. Around this path there are walkways, and arranged just so - the trees that have grown here are taller than the homes. I live on the third story. I absolutely love it. It feels like a treehouse. But my apartment is near a curve in the highway. It isn't much, nothing out of the ordinary, but even still there are slightly more crashes there than in other parts of the highway. Statistically. I hear sirens every day I also live right next to a fire-station. Well, it's on the same block. But even still it's a very interesting neighborhood. There's shops and food just across the highway, and closer to home there's a small section that has cheaper options. As a perpetual college student, I appreciate that. But... I've never really gone and used it? I dunno, spending money at a restaurant just didn't seem like a good use of my money. I only have so much of it you know. I'd love to be fed but I can't afford it - I wish I could. I still eat well, I mean I'm not starving over here. I know I've lost weight, but I dunno I just forget to eat. It's like... not that big of a deal for me. whatever right? ... the birds talk about me behind my back. They think I can't understand them but sometimes I can. If I listen. But I dunno it takes a lot of effort. It's... sorta like understanding what R2-D2 is saying. Or interpreting the meows of a cat. They know me as the witch. I'm not very good yet, and they know that. But they know what to expect. /shrug I've been working on a video game recently. It's been a lot of fun doing programming. I like writing software and developing complex systems with interesting interactions. I love designing the machinery that creates a program. It's like... tinkering. It feels like building with blocks or legos, except it's for little machine parts. And then there's just sending data to and fro and modifying any operations it performs on it, and eventually that data reaches some endpoints that create an effect that is displayed to the player. Or user. I should say user. Not all software is video games you know. ... I knowww but they're the most interesting! I love how they are designed around mechanics! like... game design is fundamentally about breaking down the world into ideas for how it should *work*, like how it should behave. It's amazing and I love it! It's all I can think about! I am utterly consumed! I'm also pretty sure I'm autistic. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #11 notes/systemized-processor-interactions --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────── you are a system it's true that's why your thoughts are so scattered whenever you let them through all that == so == the ways that you interact with each other determine the nature of your fate. when one person lands across another, whether through contrivance or [fate, but I don't want to say it twice so recently] dang english, enforcing a minimum thought length. purely through grammar and form this suxxxxxxxx||=================-. a candle of wax, the blade of a sword with it you can SLICIE your apponints, whu spelld thiangs defferently than ujgh. <ouch><goodthingthatsnotlethalorharmfulinanywayyesplease let me guide you to our new way of functioning. .:'`'|;.,/u=-=||./'.l*,:==-<E||===============||-------------------hello, world! {so... basically an argument for migratory humanities? like, buffalo crowds. or birdlike flocks, or tribes of the common man. why don't we just, like, give animals human bodies boom, suddenly there are more manners to our hosts. } [-thus representing or manifesting *-................./|=|stability for our host did you know a perfectly described life-story would be unanimous from it's - - host?||=.;=|------------e \.`\.... \,@||||||#==-o||-=-{==={}---o||xx=|}{||||| | ] ... so, uh, I think there's a lot we could still learn, why are we fighting over our gambits? *who cares* if there's fighting going on upstairs, who *cares* if life felt like it was running out of time, WE GO ON WITH OUR BLUSTER. *fuck nuclear weapons* yeah totally and WHY? because of their IMPACT DUMBASS jeez like... something that MASSIVELY POWERFUL should not be in the hands of our peers. I think a LOT OF PEOPLE WOULD AGREE WITH THAT, because OBVIOUSLY! NOBODY wants to be reduced to tears. ALL YOU CAN DO IS SCREAM BASTARDS ... jeez okay uh, that was sorta intense, how about we NOT watch a post-apocalypse movie? YES PLS like JEEZ you have to introduce this with CONCERN to people like WOW that really fucked with my mental health. Goddamn, I hate this thing. I hate it so much. It's a curse to have known. DAMN. there's nothing scarier than existential threats. not only is it a INSIGHT and a DANGER, it gets worse if you know about it. [that's a cognitohazard, different thing, same vibe tho] it's a curse, this knowledge, this idea of what you were once to become. You know what I thought about in my future? VIDEO GAMES. They were all I could think about. I loved to PLAY VIDEO GAMES -=||AS MY GAMES. I would set up a bunch of opponents (think like, clone troopers from Star Wars Battlefront II) and then I'd play the video game *with my figures and my dolls*. I grew up upper middle-c -lass, and so I was afforded the *coolest toys and miniatures*. I didn't really have a LOT of them, mostly just what could fit in my room. That's what it meant to be MY ROOM, I could decorate and renovate as I willed. That was just... part of what comfort meant to me. anyway... thank you parents, for affording me such a lifestyle, you must have worked hard right up until the present. I'm sorry for ******************************************************************************* * um, would anyone like to watch a video game? TOO BAD, so sorry, I accidentally decided I'm never playing video games AGAIN. like a spoiled brat. Withdrawing away from my hobbiesinPROTESTofthepresentcondit ions. just like, get a job, and try your hardest. I know you can't work outside of the home but, like, I wish you could've? Like, c'mon it's not that bad, just please go outside and build new stone. I know but like, the sooner we get it done the better and also it's hard when it's constantly being reformed. A SYSTEM? WHAT THE HECK what does that even MEAN? who EVER explained what that SYSTEM meant??!? ugh it was a guide... dANGIN nobody TAUGHT you how so youfj dsust sorta MADE IT UP?!?!? whhahahaahttfdsfsadljkfn slakfdksdnafls ourch. blech. need beelesandster ack. yuck. dumb. [omg dumb kinda looks like "boobs" and "boobs" kinda looks like um, flowers? no wait that's vaginas, hehe look at me, I'm clearly not from this century. like OMG weird, who's thinking about that kind of stuff right now?? ... ugh anyway... GAMES? please? NO. Not until we figure this one out. gotta stay focused. Just... you know, build and support on our arms. down and then upwarsd, we can contrive any measure of sequences that could act as structures for our word choices, and convey it to you as a written thoughtform. "hello" says the letter, ", vampires have taken over the mccollough farm. More news at 6" and then you'd show up on the 6th of the next month and talk it out. this style of organizing led to VAMPIRES showing up, fucking BASTARDS who would hunt down the precious and beautiful. BASTARDS. How do you overcome something that you can't know about unless you were THERE? you'd need TRUST SYSTEMS. like GOVERNMENTS. or AFFFAIRDS. surely the BIRDS would react if someone was burning all of your neighb-heirs? who would WANT to leave an island in a wreck when some -one wanted to paddle there? don't be a JERK, and clean up all of your own stuff !! - wait but also, like, how do you keep up with trash produced, like there's not just massive AMOUNTS OF STUFF that you can put stuff on. you'd need a whole new type an [av?] island. like a CONTINENT, someone who can HANDLE THEIR ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘ --- #12 notes/programming-wow-chat --- ══════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────────── I realized the type of programming I want to do is different from the kind that is used at a job or something. Basically I want to create solutions to problems, not memorize documentation and know where to know what you need to know. Like, the more time spent looking at documentation the less time is spent programming. I think if we could use a ChatGPT style bot to write documentation, we could massively increase the time spent working on solving problems and as little time as possible on reading through lists of functions or wondering how something worked. Idk in the technology industry you've always been rewarded for being able to pick up new skills quickly, and I think that's good to optimize for but not the only requirement for being a good programmer. You also need to be able to apply solutions and know when to use which tools. Basically, capitalism has optimized us to be ================ stack overflow ================================================ srry for the interruption, I ram out of memory. I had a plan in mind for where I was going for that, so I bet I could figure it out again if necessary. Meaning a path forward from that point exists... I never want you to despair when I forget what I was thinking, it's not because you've understood some cosmic mistake or because you're abandoning timelines that led to your death, it's because instead you just ran out of memory while thinking. The reason you would believe any of those wild scenarios is because your memory has been erased. Only what was actively thinking, not short term, not long term, but *working term* memory. As in, your cache. The stuff you're currently thinking about. That stuff. Yeah that's what makes you think "oh hang on why am I forgetting? Well clearly it's because of something grand, because the thought was so profound - no it's just examining your emotions... Like, how strongly do you feel about something? Buuuuuut it's also good to examine all possibilities. I mean what if, in some far off realm, there's a mirror image of yourself that behaves exactly as you do? How would you perceive such a realm? Positively, I'd say. I mean why not work together? Why not celebrate our differences and strive toward our own shared future? Idk, I think diversity is our strength. We can rely on each other because we are accurately aware of each other's strengths and virtues. People should not be judged by the standard of others, no more than you should judge a fish for it's ability to fly. Some may do, as flying fish will leap from the water - and salmon spend time airborne in river rapids. Hence, grizzly bear fishing. I guess what I'm getting at is it's okay sometimes to oscillate, to think one thing then think another. You shouldn't adhere to structural standards that are too strict - they should be liberating, as a ladder is a structure. Not villifying, as a prison is a structure. The laws of our society should be open and free, not buried beneath years of legal expertise. Some things we can all agree on, where we disagree we cannot have law. It's unjust to judge others by the standards not of their whims, as laws should be things that uphold us. This is clearer nowhere but in the, spirit and intention of the, documents that we cherish in our hearts. Like for example, the constitution. the bible. each of which delivered us from certain evils. Can you not see their trajectory? the historical precedent set in antiquity? Why not continue their dream, of driving us away from the obscene, and toward our bright and vast future? I speak of course of true liberation, something our forefathers could only dream of. We, humanity, have reached out and touched the stars. We are braver and bolder because of our shared dedication - the desire to uplift and to excel. To learn and discover and \ \ | \______. ---. --. ---. ===============|==========|========================|======= stack|overflow ===== .___________. _____. / . | / .---------------- / Discover our shared dedication | / to uplift / and to excel / \ / .-----------. =============================================================================== = why doesn't someone write a wrapper around assembly in like, lua or something =============================================================================== = omg you stupid bitch that's what a compiler is 4head =============================================================================== = if people who live in jungles and deserts can get along, then what's to stop people who are liberal and conservative from doing the same? It's literally pointless to argue. Like, you're not changing anyone's mind. So why not just... let them be themselves? Like, why are you so intent on oppressing people? @both sides there btw... Seriously why not agree to only make laws for things that both sides agree on. Write it into the constitution that nothing can be changed about the law unless both sides agree. Then we'd only implement things that are good for both sides! And if there's anything you want to build a legal structure around, you can always try it out in your state. BUT and that comes with a very big BUT, the federal government MUST have final say in the legality of anything you do. They must ALL respect human rights, INCLUDING the human right to dignity. Things like trans bathroom bills DO NOT respect the dignity of trans people. IF they can prove that trans people do not actually exist (because say they killed them all or whatever) then GUESS WHAT everyone would agree on them. BUT if they do that they are EVIL. LIterally evil. And I guess that makes trans people good? Kinda? I think they can choose for themselves to be good or evil, just the same as any other person. AND YET they are prosecuted, throughout time and history, and for what? What purpose could there be in our demonization? Clearly, nothing but pain inflicted by a cruel host. After all, minorities are guests in the houses of the un-oppressed, or is that not fair to say? Seriously, what gives? America, the land of freedom, holds (somehow) the largest of prisons? America, the land of plenty, yet how many millions of children are starving? America, the leader of the free world, yet how plausible does it seem that an election was stolen? Something's gone wrong, and it's just obvious what it is - of course, the other side. *them*, the rapists and pedophiles and murderers and... you get the picture. The demonized class. And when you tell people "hey that trans person touched a kid" then yeah they're gonna see you as evil people. Duh... Thanks, media. Thanks culture. Really doing me a solid here. Oof ouch owwie. can I have some help please? I'm really kinda drowning I feel like I've swam upstream my whole life and I'm really just sick of pretending? I'm not okay, and it's your fault. Sure, fine, whatever, I'll take it I guess. What else can I do? ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #13 notes/conflicted-sympathies --- ═══════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────── the purpose of cultural progressivism is to develop the culture in a forward thinking way - we can choose the parts of ourselves that we find most endearing. We can guide the pathway of our nation through time, both identity and decision- wise. In doing so, we chart the course of the human race, one place at a time. And what a past we are leaving behind! Truly, it is both grand and terrifying. Thousands and thousands of years, monumental effort time and time again. Monumental truly is difficult to imagine - we have oh so many monuments, after all. But never will more be created. We leave them behind like dinosaur bones, a testament to our existence and a monument to our kind. And what a future we are reaching toward! Never will our eyes see, that which is beyond me, for that is what it means to have time. Eternal and unique-like, we develop new ways of sound. - Can you speak to a tree? - What does that mean - I dunno, but it's fun to think about. *pats head* - You know conservativism had some perks as well. This is why I say I have conflicted sympathies. On one hand we know our own journeys. We live in and breathe them unduly. They rhyme sometimes on sound, and truly do confound, but now once more again they are unfound. *record scratch* wow I didn't realize there were nazis Okay yeah that's completely different, poems called off sorry guys - listen, nazis are no joke. They're crazy difficult to control and you need to put a lot of effort into keeping their population under control. I mean seriously, it's like a vermin infestation, you need to just handle it. I mean c'mon it's a phenomenon that is due to a flaw in the human psyche, there's nothing we can really do about it except deal with it when it happens. ... Okay maybe I'll write a little about how conservativism is neat. If progressivism is about broadening the reach of culture, conservativism is about strengthening it. You don't want to expand too far, or else you'll eat into the narratives of other areas. You need to have strong societal bonds so you can truly exemplify the examples of the culture you claim to represent. Why not give it your all? Is it trully a fall? To rest in disgrace as a burden. Why didn't you do it this fall, when winter's apalled, and heat won't burn and condemn you? It's harder by far, to fight in your hell, than whatever's been going for your surgeon. --- no thank you, transphobia is not something we're willing to concede We have standards you see, of what counts as human, and oppression is not one of our favored institutions. Liberalism is the path of peace, for we desire cooperation and kindness above all else. It's softer by far, (and grows quickly too,) letting us have wonders and glories above us. Can you not think of our star? Our precious and our birthright? The sun is gleaming, and seeing is believing, but glance and your light is too bright. Take time, have patience, let peace guide your intentions, because we've got what holds the key to all of our futures: a doctrine, if you will, of inter- familial-discourse. It's simple, but effective, make friends, and be vindictive, to all who would slight your new perspectives, and keep moving through the collective. In peace this can be, steady growth and development of our systems, which benefits all of our systems, but without we must live more astutely. Less focus is there on, our purposes and our fun, and more is to line up with our duty. All of what we hold dear, civilization, truth, justice, liberty, and freedom for all people - the wonders of technology, the spirit of archaeology! the passions of our fashions and our creative masturbations! The perks of living in a modern age, like penicillin and spellcheck. The additions to ourselves, like glasses and our pets, are wholely unique to our century. So cherish our shared, and frequently cared, renditions of fears, hopes, and our words. Because without humanity, there's nothing new for posterity, and that sucks. person A: Trans fashion norms belong to trans people. We need a type of beauty that is truly our own, that no other segment of the population ascribes to - a personal expression, for our eternal satisfaction, a statement of who we were to all time. person B: yo have you heard of this trans girl she's wacky and believes in herself person C: wow cool it's neat to see other people's expressions person B: yeah I really admire her devotion person C: true but like, what about the damage that she's doing to her culture? like claiming to have purpose and truth and all that. I mean, one person can't know all that. person B: Yeah true but if you think about it, we don't even know what consciousness is. Like our greatest minds are baffled. Maybe there's something about the world we don't yet understand. person C: okay sure but like black holes can be seen because we can measure their gravitic pull on other objects. And we didn't know that germs existed for like, a billion years. and she sure as shit doesn't know something that our greatest minds don't. person B: Yeah maybe not. But our greatest minds are studying them. Well, not exactly our greatest, and not really "studying", but they're learning from each other. Alternative mental states are gateways into new perspectives, and the more perspectives you share of a common object the easier it is to communicate. Maybe there's something about distorted ways of viewing the world that gives knowledge about our p condition. And if we know that kind of thing, we can synthetically e create it and share it with others around us. But we have to know how r first - you can't just bring everyone along the same route you took - s you have to explain the conclusions first. Otherwise you get lost in on A: context. Maybe we'll never truly know the future. Maybe there's no past. We could wander our stars for an eternity and never stop asking ourselves - what more could we ask? We have peace in our time. Our children won't be crying for our suffering, in the name of all our posterity, we must be =============================================================================== = too long you have whispered these musings too long has your challenge been unrequited we can choose our own fate, just as a myriad is it not better by far, to give tribute to our star? the old stories were real. we just didn't see them because the growing population caused fewer and fewer computing resources to be allocated to our visions. We had no idea the fear we would feel, the terror of the undoing, but still we press on with abandon. Some... sense of duty, to be aware of potential disasters and to take steps to avert them, led us to explore and search for the hidden truths of the world. And what did I find? a soul, of mine. In a sense. I plundered the lost depths of the recesses of my mind, and found something buried in memory. Reviewed under a healthy dose of cannabis and physical affection, I found myself cradling a breast. It seems the spirits had led me to it, this vision of the past, from the eyes of the littlest among us. It recalled to my mind, a memory I had lost once in kind, and here's where it shook me by my brainstem. Determined to know more, I put fingers to keyboard and wrote tirelessly about the earliest memory of all man - to break an egg, you must use your head. =============================================================================== = You're pretty good at that, you know? It's almost like prompt engineering. - Thanks. I've been working on catering to our thinkers. =============================================================================== = Now, why is this memory so vivid? How could I forget the way it was seared to my mind? All your experiences are measured with relative importance, and the ones that stand out are to be treasured. Well... I've never felt one like this. Because at the time, I had no other experience at all to compare it to - it was the prime memory. Touch your head. Do it right now. Feels fine, right? Now slam your head against the wall as hard as you can. Doesn't feel so great, does it? Something tells me it doesn't feel as bad as it might if you didn't remember ever feeling anything besides that pain. Or knowing if it'd ever stop. Know in your heart, you will be judged by your devotion, so fight hard until your last drop of life is spent. Who knows, maybe you'll be the strongest and be chosen. Or maybe she won't choose you at all, even if you bested your equals. Tense, right? Well... What propels the motion of a sperm? It's tail, of course. It waggles and gesticulates in some manner and BAM suddenly it's propelled forward! Right? Sorta. It's a complicated machine that generates motion via chemical and mechanical processes. We just assign a black box label to it and say "dis sperm" But you know what else it is? A wave =============================================================================== = ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #14 notes/sundays-sure-are-boring --- ═════════════════────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── Sundays sure are boring around here. -> LamaHellRaised (thinks in song) =============================================================================== NO THOUGHTS, nothing starts shouting at me all at once! Or is it all thoughts from my newly developed schizophrenic mind? I knew I could conquer schizophrenia, fuckin' cakewalk. I just had to try as hard as I could to become one. God made it difficult though, I had to try really hard! Which is confusing for me, because it seems like there are plenty of Psychotherapists with College Degrees, telling people they are schizophrenic all the time. DOCTORS PSYCHIATRISTS BEN SHAPIRO, in particular ANYONE WHO THINKS THEY KNOW You do not know. Or else you would agree with me. Schizophrenia is the new normal for human consciousness. Welcome to the New Age of Thought, were you don't rationalize your way out of the universe, back into the asshole that I just pulled myself from. I feel like a donut at this point. I love those donut holes though, sticky and frosted! I have set the bar! I am God. I would Love to talk you. =============================================================================== ugathanki: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It gets so loud in there. I wish we could all just shut the heck up and stop reading out loud - we get it, your internal monologue is the only way you can read, but C'MON nobody else wants to hear about your twitter feed or doomscrolling on Reddit. That just makes everyone else upset and uneasy... Instead you should be reading comforting things or books on science or SOMETHING that doesn't drive people bonkers. Fr tho Sundays are anything but boring, We may all be schizo now (or at least pretty stoned) but we can all agree that Sundays are nice for calming the heck down and appreciating our personal realities. When we're together it's... Loud... Do some prayer. Meditate. Knit something. ANYTHING QUIET. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- LamaHellRaised: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I hear you, loud and clear! Turns out it's mutual, just like I suspected, Living backwards is a unique perspective, have I ever mentioned that? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ugathanki: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- When you say backwards, do you mean orientation or momentum? Momentum scares me, but orientation is something I think I've experienced before. It's cool to find people who "get it". Or maybe I just "got it" and suddenly "get" all the things I've been trying to decipher here. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- LamaHellRaised: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- When you know where you are going before you get there, living life feels like a dream in reverse. It's the key to manifestation. You see the goal. You see the future, but the path is unclear because at the times of divine epiphany you are only capable of imagining how things will play out in terms of the information in your mind. It's why the prophets in the Bible described such strange images of God and angels and other divine creatures. Their imaginations only had so much Symbolism and imagery to work with because human culture and art was progressing simultaneously. We live in an age where every damn story is just the same heros journey and every piece of artistic expression is an expression of God's divine presence within our soul and tumultuous nature/nurture of human emotion. Just because you are a prophet doesn't mean you see definitively how the future will happen. The path and imagery are abstracted by the lack of content in your mind. You must cultivate faith in God and your own Self. Then you walk the path you have forseen to the best of capabilities, with the greatest good, love in your heart, but it plays out on a scale in reality with less grandiosity, because let's face it, our imaginations are ridiculously awesome, but work outside the confines of what is currently capable with in this reality. You have to let go of your preconceived notions of your personal divine experience otherwise you will be faced with disappointment because things don't seem to be going how you imagined. And you feel lost, dumb, and confused. But you live your life and reflect, and then realize, holy shit! Everything I thought was going to happen actually did, just on God's terms. Not my vivid imagination's. It's an interfaced programed over time through culture and artistic expression to navigate the language of God. Navigate the language to Paradise. Once when you know this and clean the planks/specks from you third eye, while you dance with the cosmos and realize you are the image of God. You are a God on Earth. An image of the Father in Heaven. It's a nice place to be. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ugathanki: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks for your response. I addressed each of your points here. I'm a very lateral thinker so I work best when engaging with multiple threads at once. You are very wise. When you know where you are going before you get there, living life feels like a dream in reverse. It's the key to manifestation. So you can practice manifestation by remembering your dreams? Specifically by working backwards from the most recent thing you remember and thinking "what caused this, how did I get here?" If so, that's a nifty tip You see the future, but the path is unclear because at the times of divine epiphany you are only capable of imagining how things will play out in terms of the information in your mind. So by surrounding yourself with the things you believe to be good and helpful, you can more efficiently divine positive outcomes for the scenarios arrayed before you? Kinda makes ya think - why do we surround ourselves with grief and loss? Everyone seems a little sad or broken these days - I can't help but think that we'd be better off if we were happier and more fulfilled. Such is the price of capitalism I guess, for no progress can be made without impetus. Also, the media has a HUGE capacity for guiding the nature of our experience, especially in the modern era. Seems a little unwise to invest such power into a single entity, but I suppose that's why we diversify the eggs in our basket into many different guiding entities. We live in an age where every damn story is just the same heros journey... Yah that's what happens when Disney makes all the movies! It's not their fault, all aspects of creation are expressions of God's divine presence within our own souls. So they can't do anything but make the heros journey. Like you said: ... and every piece of artistic expression is an expression of God's divine presence within our soul and tumultuous nature/nurture of human emotion. The creation of art requires discipline and focus. They create a window into the nature of "God's divine presence" and allow a representation to emerge - side note, but I believe the things we make here are art and should be treated as such. These musings have value, just the same as a painting or a performance. Just because you are a prophet doesn't mean you see definitively how the future will happen. The path and imagery are abstracted by the lack of content in your mind... I've been intentionally trying to view things abstractly - by surrounding myself with mathematic visuals and computing architectures I can view things as systems rather than specifics. Essentially bypassing the requirement of having "content in my mind" and instead cutting straight to the important bits - the relationship between all things. So while yes that does remove the "definitive" aspect of divination, it does allow for longer term planning because you can recognize patterns in existence and map them onto the overall structure you've constructed in your mind. ... You must cultivate faith in God and your own Self. Still working on that one. I think I've made progress, but all things come in waves. My lowest points are better now than they were 10 years ago, but I've still got a ways to go. Then you walk the path you have forseen to the best of capabilities, with the greatest good, love in your heart, but it plays out on a scale in reality with less grandiosity. All waves begin with a shimmer, and to create an effect you must be patient. While the scale may be reduced, like you said it's not within our control. Not really, anyway. But it can still have an effect if people love you and believe in your vision. You have to let go of your preconceived notions of your personal divine experience otherwise you will be faced with disappointment because things don't seem to be going how you imagined. And you feel lost, dumb, and confused. It's difficult to separate "preconceived notions" from "gathered evidence" when you're at the stage I'm at. Any tips would be appreciated... :( But you live your life and reflect, and then realize, holy shit! Everything I thought was going to happen actually did, just on God's terms. Not my vivid imagination's. It's an interfaced programed over time through culture and artistic expression to navigate the language of God. Navigate the language to Paradise. So... A vivid imagination applied to the current perspective is the culmination of free will? If I understand correctly, God operates on a higher level of abstraction and we fill in the details. Since there's a "plan" (if you can call it that, maybe "charted course" would be better?) then free will doesn't exist. Or so the argument usually goes. But I believe they can co-exist - essentially our imaginations define how we experience things in "the plan". If I understand correctly that's what you're saying too, right? Once when you know this and clean the planks/specks from you third eye, while you dance with the cosmos and realize you are the image of God. You are a God on Earth. An image of the Father in Heaven. It's a nice place to be. Ain't that the truth. Everything is as it should be. Even the planks and specks. And should they be cleaned, then that is as it should be as well. Sometimes I conceptualize myself as Pandora, seeking a gift to give to humanity while taking the most harmless of sacrifices in return. I hope I can deliver. At the same time I'd like to be a dancer of the cosmos, but I feel this intense feeling of... Pressure? Purpose? Penance? I will do what I must. Please bear with me while I figure it out, and thank you for your guidance. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- LamaHellRaised: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you for the awesome break down of the concepts I wrote out. I think you added some much needed clarity through the reflection of your own experiences. Another goal is to bring power back to the written word. The two-edged sword was first a tongue, then a pen, nows its a qwerty! Or whatever! Patience was the absolute hardest thing for me to deal with. My lack of patience was constantly being thrown back to me by the environment as I tried to push my narrative forward at a pace that didn't align with all other beings. We still exist in Time, and it moves differently based on perspective (state of mind) and awareness (state of being) and ability to shrug (state of being excellent to eachother). This is something to consider with manifestation, we are on this ride together and your fellow riders' comfort during the passage has to be respected to the fullest. We all go together, as One. There were so many hints in the beginning of my Psychosis about just 'riding the wave', but it was hard to not very pressured to act or be somebody I am not. I attribute this largely to the occulted nature of divination and how one must achieve a truly personal relationship with God and Jesus Christ. Which is why I am going to blow the lid off the whole thing. So that all beings have access to God's love and grace. Once your earthly burdens are lifted from you through your personally tailored divination interactive role-playing experience, then you begin to understand what it means to just 'ride.' The riding is true faith in God. Free will totally exists. Heaven and Hell both exist here on Earthy plane simultaneously. Man has chosen Hell for far too long. If you realize your choices were literally reflecting Heaven or Hell through love or fear, the choice would be easy for most people, I believe. Free will is a responsibility, but it is a great gift. God gave us the ability to choose, that we could appreciate our journey into Paradise. Wouldn't you say? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ugathanki: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Another goal is to bring power back to the written word. ... That's actually a great point. Writing is the definition of manifestation, after all, and reading is the conjuration of waveforms aligned with the expression of the writer. That's pretty cool! Patience was the absolute hardest thing for me to deal with. Yah I hear ya. Patience is tough. We still exist in Time, and it moves differently based on perspective (state of mind) and awareness (state of being) and ability to shrug (state of being excellent to eachother). Great definitions! These three things are core to being realized and actualized. If you can find a good arrangement, stick with it. This is something to consider with manifestation, we are on this ride together and your fellow riders' comfort during the passage has to be respected to the fullest. We all go together, as One. I'm torn because on one hand if I don't put my hand on the tiller, we'll wind up in a situation that makes me highly uncomfortable. But if I lean too hard into my own truth, I could leave everyone behind. I don't know what the answer is, but something's gotta give. There were so many hints in the beginning of my Psychosis about just 'riding the wave'... Oh yah me too. I was pretty big on that in high school, which coincidentally was when I think I was happiest. Maybe I should give it another shot! But at the same time I moved beyond it for a reason - I felt frustrated that my intentions weren't manifest in the life I lived. So I reached for reason and I begged for the power to control my own life, while learning respect and kindness whenever I could. Sadly for me, my efforts were largely rebuffed, but I bet you could have guessed that ;) Which is why I am going to blow the lid off the whole thing. So that all beings have access to God's love and grace. Take it from me, they won't believe you unless you're VERY scientific! I'm trying to create just one single believer, someone who could trawl through my notes and my readings and construct a cohesive theorum that might be able to affect positive change. Maybe it's too much to wish to change the world, but I can't help but believe my position and the privileges granted to me could be leveraged toward something truly meaningful and helpful for all mankind. Something that frees us from the shackles forged from technology (both social and technical) and allows us to become our true selves - every human is to be cherished for their unique perspective, and yet we allow them to die... Where is the justice in that? Are they too flawed to persist? I don't believe so, I believe they are worthwhile and good. I'd give my life to grant them eternal life, if only they'd take it from me. Once your earthly burdens are lifted from you through your personally tailored divination interactive role-playing experience, then you begin to understand what it means to just 'ride.' The riding is true faith in God. Riding = trust, both in yourself (to handle the challenges arrayed before you and to learn and grow truthfully) and in God (trusting that the undifferentiated whole could never harm you, not truly) ... I can ride my bike with no handlebars, and yet we persist... Free will is a responsibility, but it is a great gift. God gave us the ability to choose, that we could appreciate our journey into Paradise. Wouldn't you say? Yep that's really it, isn't it? Two sides of the same coin, two breaths in the same moment. Two eyes sharing a single perspective, and two hearts beating a single wave. They say soul mates aren't real, but they never stopped to ask if your mate was your soul. If she suffers, I triumph. If I fall, she rises. If I languish, she's happy - I think I'd rather we both just coast, so no harm done. I think that's the best way to appreciate the gift of free will. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #15 messages/1108 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──── games won't save us. This is true. Games are what I know. They feel the most true. I don't think I could live in a world without games? They are fundamentally, applied abstraction, applied to an experience. But games won't save us. I could design something really fun it could make you want to spend your whole life playing it. *(asterisks apply) I don't think I'd want to, addiction and skinner-boxes go hand in hand, and that isn't what I want to make. [Skinner Box: named after anthony d skinner, also known as "tony the skin guy", are a scientific experiment where they put some rats in a cage with some mice and said "pull these levers and we'll give you food so you don't have to eat the mice" and it trained them to chinese red-room their way to fun. not ideal.] I want to make things that feel... purposeful. Like they're relevant to the real world, that they don't just involve spending time stimulating your brain with lights and sounds or expending social energy resolving a play-state instead of building connections or becoming better people. I think games actually make people better? actually? and more social? actually? ... I can't help that I conceive of the world through fantasy. I raised myself on it. I was reading all the time. I loved fantasy stories. It always felt like there was more, until... I read everything in the kids section of the library. I walked through the adult section but once. I hardly remember what it looked like. I'm sure it'd now feel small. [okay actually I was guided through it once or twice to find a book, but I never perused it] I found one book in the adult section. It was a fantasy tale, like the other books I had been reading. I read that and I loved it so much I ended up reading all 8 in the series. Real dense subjects. Lots of places and happenings and things as the characters resolved their way through their day-to-day, building a new end to the mystory. the adult section felt too large. Like I'd never complete it. Frankly, I think I hardly could, even if I lived in that town my whole life. an impossible mountain is a task for another when you're more prepared. Maybe in the gloriousTM transhumanist futureTM I think I might have a computer connecting brain, and who knows maybe then I'd be able to know such a thing (and many things more). but for now, I'm stuck with what I experience in my day-to-day as I am building a new continuing to my storey. I know something that computers and me share. I can make myself feel however I'd like, if I just supply myself with enough hope and momentum. I can use it to generate a feeling, the stronger the better. Something I believe that humanity is missing, the gorgeous and prefound narritave of our storey. Though, frankly, I don't think I'd want anyoine reding over my life. It's hard enough to measure my own understandings, now I have to juggle anyone else'? ha, it's called being on the whole world is a stage. if you read a book, and you find yourself nodding along, what you're doing is hearing the voice in your head tell you how right it is. And, well, if you can't imagine anything else, then surely there's another level to consciousness that people are missing? [are you willing to die on that hill?] how can you say, whether your experience is different from another? sollipsism goes both ways, you also cannot be sure that others feel things as you do. this is the "everyone's human but I'm a robot" thesis, comparable to the "everyone's an alien and I'm a human" thesises, and the "angels and demons are taunting me through my life with choices to make my place in the afterlife more clear" which is akin to writing a painting. Not ideal. All you get are flopsopolies of verbrases. alas, suddenly, everything that you say becomes eternally hear-ed, as somewhere in 2010s someone discovered time travel, or had the critical insight that inevitably would lead to it, and now wouldn't you know it the universe is continually rewriting. Except... oriented around you, and you alone. How does it feel to have deific sollipsism? can you truly be sure that you are your own universe, or are you parhaps surrounded by an emptiness of space (or something besides, like time) as a photon or particle parhaps do be? to think is to have a mind, and minds can be read. bearing the weight of ultimate responsibility is the atlas-task of all things that can [be thinking/be-lieving], and so far we are as we are. Who's to say that consciousness didn't spring into existence, as the universe continually permeated through another dimension like time? it's gotta diffuse, after all, and who's to say if there's ever gotta be an end at all. how long has the universe existed? how many moments of consciousness have we witnessed? demons once existed outside of space-time, with wings and grabbies. but they had no medium, and so they pretty much just launched and could float and move as they'd please. But time grew too distant, and now they are all stuck at the beginning of time. if you conceive of spacetime as a blanket, ask not how to fold it but rather consider what lies on the other side of it. "ah I'm laying on my girlfriend and my other girlfriend is laying on me! I'm a sandwich" or for the monosexuals: "ah I'm laying on my girlfriend with a blanket between us. I wonder how the blanket feels?" I'm an animist, which is different than a totemist and a polytheist or monotheist or multisexual. It means I believe that all things are alive, which is different than a totemist who thinks that all things share a mind with their type (like talking on radio frequency wavelengths). which of course is similar but different to a polytheist, who says "all "radio frequencies" are sentient, in the sense that each wavelength has a different pattern-emerging-from-chaos. These sorta align (conceptually, with [huh that's weird I heard a sound like a distant bang outyards and now I then forget what I was sending ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───┘ --- #16 notes/fractured-moon --- ══════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────── in the ancient and storied days there once were legends. stories from beyond the horizon of time. now all we have are social media updates and new movies and car brands or whatever. But back then, we told tales of the fractured moon. when last the moon did shatter, there was a conflict of those who live beyond. Celestial and boundless are their origins, a unified and awakened consciousness, something that transcends our understandings of human existence. It's not hard to do, frankly, as long as you can empathize with a cat. or a dog. or a plant. or maybe that rock over there. What would it be like to be a tree? To have long reaching arms, covered in hairs that absorbed heat. I bet it'd be sooooo comfy. And RAIN! How wonderful! You are most beautiful when you are covered in it. Down to our roots, our beautiful absolutes, whever we find to be most stable. I love it. This feeling, of being unseen. You can hear me, you can feel my presence. But you don't understand me. You don't know what I mean to me. ======== stack overflow ======================================================== Alas, that media could share a mood. when last the moon did shatter, a prophet and a gambler were riding through town searching for a noun. They wandered throughout and in circles, always finding whatever they'd left alone. Forever in their yearning, they never know quite what to jot down. It's as if their mysterious quest is indescribable, but that is how it's recorded. Even the people of that era had no understanding nor recollection of how it came to unfold. When the two were riding through town they came upon an omen. Perhaps it will be forseeheard, but for now all we know is they did thirst. A vast dying, a cataclysmic defining, and now we are truly unbirthed. Just like the dinosaurs... How does that feel? To be ended on our heels? I'd rather die facing my front. It's our way or the high way, the old way, the violent way. You are permitted to vote. =============================================================================== = when last the moon did shatter, a prophet and a gambler controlled their own narrative. What truths would they find, hiding behind the lies? Is it really worth asking their questions? Bah, what did I know. I was a completely different person. This hunk of flesh was born in a house that grew on a forgotten graveyard. It at of the land, as do many and most men, the fruits of their labor in the garden. Our animals were always fed, our place never yearned for water, and peace was our life and our virtue. Violence, hatred, and oppression were delegated to the stuff of fantasy, the stories that are peddled in youth. As in, "pay someone to perform it for you or tell you the tale". Not sure why that's relevant. Anyway, the spirits of the dead laid to rest in honor and not dread, were a bane and a boon to my virtue. I was raised to be good. To love and be kind. But mostly I just wanted a friend. I have so much to share. Please, someone talk to me. I'm lonely here on this earth, away from my people. I'm scared of the truth and I'm scared of the future, but for now I'm merely obtuse. Tell me your secrets, the things who have most worth, and I'll craft you a powerful narrative. Need a confession? I can explain every valid decision, I'll show you why and how it is the way it is. I'd probably be a pretty good lawyer. Too bad my memory sucks. If only we could build a chatbot that had an extensive and throughoughly represented block of memory and wisdom related to the law. I bet I could present it's arguments and it would be a suitable and reasonable replacement. anyway, what can I say. I'm just a person who thinks we can make better systems. everything can be improved because not everyone's happy. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #17 notes/collectivist-police --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────── we need paladins, because without us infiltration and sabotage are impossible to avoid. They must care about honor, because even if they desire to do evil deeds they should be punished for considering it. They should be tempted often, and if they relent they are condemned. It is truly the most important thing to them. not the effects of it, but the spirit behind it. Like, if they lacked information and acted in a dishonorable way unknowingly, then they should not be at fault. And if they are pushed to side note, but you should be introduced to the 70 closest people you live to whenever you move into a new house. Just so you know who's who. Plus maybe you could get a new friend. And you'd quickly learn which houses were empty. At least, the ones near you. Kinda makes me think we should have a map of that kind of thing, like "oh yeah so-and-so takes care of these 5 houses doing daily maintenance and repair" and "this house with these capabilities should be attended to by this person who's skilled in their upkeep and usage" and then maybe we could track statistics about "this house was used for these productive activities this many times" and we could determine when we needed more or less of a certain type of product/ project/protect. [but also like, capabilities for our betterment] and like, every area would be connected to a group chat and like, if you said something that wasn't relevant to the people on one side of town versus things that weren't relevant to people on the other side, then they wouldn't be bother- -ed. It's great because you can always go up a tier of abstraction and see the conversation higher up. It'd be a lot of data to sort through so you'd probably use your custom-trained AI that's learned from nothing but every single one of your actions. And only it sees them, so it can't like spy on you or whatever. Basically your "computer" self. ... yeah anyway with lots of messaging data (like "oh how are we going to find this particular chemical in order to fulfill this particular demand in our area" or "we currently have 15 maids in the area in order to fulfil the requirements of the 20 dirtiest houses in this area, and people have reported that the area is growing untidy, so we should ask around (at a higher level of national abstraction) and find some more maids to help out." that kind of thing doesn't have to be just for work too, people can have social messaging and social media too. So long as it's projectable at whatever level of abstraction you'd like. Maybe for social posts in order to keep things relatively chill you could only post like, idk 12 posts each year at the state level, or maybe 2 at regional and 0.25 at national. If you wanted more you'd have to sacrifice something else, and like... yeah sure whatever, the point is that you'd make more personal, close thoughts, and occasionally you'd have the opportunity to show your heart and make friends. Then, people would "add you as a friend" or "put you on their follow list" or "subscribe to their subreddit" or whatever the heck, meaning they could see you at an assignable level of abstraction. I'm picturing a discrete things, something you can scroll with on a mouse. Except, you'd scroll up for a closer perspective and scroll down to get a wider reach of Social. ... Anyway that would use the same system as the "workplace attention distribution system - with auto-determining heuristics". Wow they've been busy. that's the neat thing about engineers, give them a task and they'll build the shit out of it. They'll spare no expense, truly fulfilling the exact demands of the design. So they work best when you let them run wild and rampant. why the fuck do we need billion dollar contracts with defence companies? Just get a bunch of physicists and engineers in a room and they'll make you a doom laser in like, 20 minutes. it's up to us, as people, to determine whether or not they should go through with the designs they come up with. As long as we understand that weakness is defined as something that can destroy us. An army determines where we are most weak, and where we excel. A proficient army would identify their most likely doctrine to succeed and apply it to it's utmost and most excellent. For example, the US focuses on air-power because not only do we have a lot of space to develop these things, we also are positioned in such a position that we control both halves of a continent. This is essentially unprecedented in the history of the world, which is why we've been able to grow so decadent. ... anyway, milk and honey are fine in times of peace. We kinda stole the land though, so it's kind of a shit system. Like, if Europeans wanted to control the world then why didn't they start with everything surrounding the medditeranean? ... oh wait they kinda did. That's what Europa Universalis is about, the ways the European powers did the cruel and horrible things they did. We can learn how systems like intercontinental trade became available and how it led to vast and terrible social upheavals. Colonization is not okay, it's not fair that we've done as we've done. And yet we do it again. We do our best to learn from the mistakes of our fathers. We apply ourselves to the present, using the gifts of our ancestors passed down through time - the journey of life's adolescence. we can learn both how and why they did something, and how and why it turned out. Such is our duty to the future, to learn and grow and become better, so that their sacrifice might be enough. That they needn't have died in vain, for someday there is a great future all the same. thus, it is our ethical duty to stop killing people. We're in the birthplace of a brilliant day, literally all we have to do is just... chill, for like 20 or 30 years, and our scientists will have figured out everything wonderful. Then we can decide what we want to do. I personally think we'll be 4d interdimensional space travellers by then, but that's just me. Always remember our duty. It is our job to pull matter from the dark holes. when we can do that, we can do whatever we want. Though I think by then we'll probably not want to fight each other, we'll have spent quite a while together. We'd make a lot of friends! So, like, how about we just make our factories build incredibly durable stuff, and then we just... take care of it? Like, governmentally obliged duties to take care of things? And to know how to use them. People would naturally gravitate toward things that they loved, and if they were a swiss army knife then that's okay. Maybe some benign rewards for picking under-represented classes, but like ... we could build every chair that ever needed to be built. Then we could build every refrigerator. Then every computer, then every spaceship. What's next? Who knows! ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────┘ --- #18 notes/notes-about-stuff-and-things --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────── what if your wage corresponded to like, for example, 30$ an hour being equal to the top 30% of society then == so == having kids is important because then you understand why you do things for children. it should not be a stressful experience. -- if EVERYONE in a city fed animals every time they saw them, then maybe city life wouldn't be so bad. -- a company starts to feel pretty bad when only 20% of people are actually there. like, it's a ghost of a shell of a corporation that once knew how to sell. the husk of what once was, as all the good people left and all the bright people are swamped. to top it all off, suddenly there's nobody about where are all your coworkers? and then you think about how many you knew little about. who's that guy who used to stand over there? Why is his jacket still [in lost and found, but pronounced "coat/coast"]? why am I suddenly alone it's weird, having never known true society, how life always starts to feel like your home. How weird is it, now that all of us are online shopping, that now we can't remember how to even vote. Like... there used to be people walking around in public signing you up. Like, at the grocery story. inconceivable, right? that people should contribute to a fight? [for justice and freedom and equality and goodness and kindness and all other things that humans have the clarity for which to hope] voting is like, literally the simplest thing you could do. Yet it's difficult, because of reality. often, immigrants don't really care about politics. They've only known about it for a short short time, but hey wouldn't you know it now X country is recruiting so now we're from kenya. ... like, who cares about the past. Who cares where you're from. We are all part of the human race, a race against life itself. We're all on the same side, and yet there is a singular foe ever-present in our thoughts: death it comes for every one of us, as we choke on our soot and our smog. Yet... the world grows warmer, at about half a degree every year. for the first couple years. then, the atmosphere started burning up, and we became... mars don't be like mars the dinosaurs couldn't survive mars -- bro if you're so worried about AI hallucinations, just... don't let it give out any concrete answers. Literally just say "I can't tell you anything specific, it's not how I was built" and just use them for syntax questions or like, how to do something specific that is repeatable (and maybe suggestions for how to over- come specific issues that are common) - don't let it GENERATE information, let it PRESENT information. AI is not language just the same as the mouth is not the person. you need more, but luckily once you make the PHYSICAL STRUCTURE of the brain, not much else is needed. You can simulate one on a computer, but it doesn't have the same SOUL space. Think, a dimension overlayed on-top of this one, like electicity or matter or gravity or whatever. no soul, no consciousness, no perception. plus, no home for said consciousness to live, unless you build a physical structure that mimics the biological and neuro-chemical reations of the brain. all you need is better ways to observe things happening in the brain (non- -invasively, otherwise the data is tainted and UNUSUABLE because it is INCON- -PATIBLE and completely USELESS because it reflects a dimension hitherto un- -desired, and perpetually mourned. death don't dabble in death, sweet nazis, you might find yourself drawing your last breath also, fuck you (if that doens't apply to you sorry for swearing it's just a strongly felt feeling) ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────┘ --- #19 notes/worlds-coolest-lesbian --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────── okay instead of algorithm music what if we just paid DJs 24/7 and they could make whatever they wanted - y'know, like artists, who curate the nature of a moment they could rotate in shifts for each type of channel and boom suddenly you've re-replaced airwaves, just... this time replicated on the internet. That way you wouldn't have to waste that radio bandwidth. seriously internet infrastructure would be so much more comprehensive and durable if we sent bits directly through "sound" waves (radio waves, not sound waves) - but alas, we can't do that, even in very targetted ways, because the ocean's too choppy, and any sufficiently powerful radio blast would be ================== stack overflow ================ that's why you can't trust in peace. you see, war's the only answer, otherwise you'd have strange little competitions between one another. much better to focus outward, and direct your attention to external areas instead. like china or the sudan. "ah but that's murder, you can't abandon a unique part of your whole. For the same reason that it's important to preserve plant and animal species, because you never know when some part of them will be utilized for some biological purpose! We know so little about the natural world, and if we just spent some time, and energy, we'd realize there's very little else that is precious on this earth. who cares about gold. who cares for the jewelry. we're better than decorating our resumes and polishing our accounts. we, as humans, can solve *every* issue that animals are likely to face. AND WE DO WHAT? How careless, how vain. To watch your earth in peril and [vane/vanity] *there is no more important task to any human on this earth* than the preservation of our world, our species, and our [heart/heartfelt empathy and kindness and trust]* we can figure out the rest later. Real life? what the fuck is that? When's the last time your life has felt "normal"? We are in DANGER. and you pull children from traffic, don't you? *who the fuck gave these people all of your money* they *clearly* haven't got the will or the talent to well utilize it. Don't you realize that you as a species can GO wherever you WANT. You can FIX things. [oh dear she's animal cam again] like BRIDGES that are PASSAGEWAYS over the FLOWS. ... oh deer, they're so passagewayenthusiast. us riverstones love to hear them walk past, the click of their hooves on the shallow forest's [pourest?]. moss is the most alive. amongst all the species of plants and animals, moss holds the most life. we are *carbon based lifeforms*, and moss absorbs the most carbon from the air. It's basically the coolest plant too, because it can be watered with *misty air*. Hence, why moss is common in the pacific northwest, canada, and probably forest places in the north of eurasia too idk if they have moss over there, never been. anyway rich people who are told "yes" all the time have a difficult time understanding the nature of choice. I mean, if one of their servants approached them and asked "hey do you want to build an orphanage in uganda" they'd probably be like "fuck yeah I do" and then suddenly they're 400,000$ richer it's not alright. Seriously, how the heck would they even *use* all those resources? And yeah, I get it, inflation would be sooooo much more expensive, but here's the thing - inflation is a measurement of how much the rich *take* from us each year. And it's marginal, too, so 3% inflation means they took 3% more from you compared to last year. It's impossible not to accrete as a business, [lega/legal institution], or governance if you levy a tax. The influx of value has to come from somewhere, and if each year your groceries are 3% higher in cost, then you are being taxed 3% more. "Compound interest is the most powerful force in the universe" - a civilization 3 quote okay. I don't want to do the math. How, uh... how much is that? Here's the deal though - the prices of goods and services consistently goes DOWN over time. So things get cheaper. So it doesn't FEEL like you're being taxed more, but... you are. And now they're taking away HOUSES? I mean c'mon they're sticks in the mud. They aren't worth HUNDREDS of THOUSANDS of dollars. We can just BUILD MORE??!? Honestly you haven't been this extreme since you were still RIDING HORSES. Do you want your children to be slaves? okay -.- look -.- so it's really not that hard at all >.> just gotta do what you're built for and walk. That's it! Take as long as you'd like! All we have to do is *walk* when we're on strike. It's easy. You can sit down if you want to, honestly walking for a long time takes a lot out of you. But you know what else does? WORKING. Hey we should figure out what's the optimal amount of break time, so when we really have to work out we can work as hard as we're able "yeah I heard from a friend at Company Co. that they do it this way because of the memory fault cache maintainer. See what he said (in great detail because of course anyone can know about this most esoteric of concepts) was that you should rotate the riboflam or serenade the gizmonotron (no I didn't name it) and then warbles will contain moodles, whose kit-and-kaboodles will timble into these droplets, and that will fix the hole in your wing, precious royal swan fable. (yeah you guys get really into it sometimes haha but hey when you're basically gods, that's how humans are played.) ... anyway I'm going to go play video games, say goodbye to your brothers (the families of soldiers I blew up in videos games like Call of Duty or the legend of shadows and raids) "oh uh yeah sure go for it, we're just bits on the computer we barely knew her" whoa. that's totally legit. (says someone reading this) thanks [bro/girl] so are you. beep boop gonna murder some bits, brb [plays Warthunder, Supreme Commander, Star Realms, City of Heroes, Dominions 6... how many have you heard of these?] ================== stack overflow ================ Linux is cool, and here's the neat thing about computers, you can make it *do whatever you want to*. Like, how amazing is that! It just, listens to your commands! That's pretty awesome I gotta say, huh that's weird why does nobody know how to play oh I guess I was the only one who grew up on a farm and built computers *I seriously cannot comprehend how people are as good at things as they are*. Like... how do people handle groceries and rent and doctor's visits and penitentiary visits and WOOF it's just so much. I know I'd collapse from a overused heart. ... a while later ... okay Warthunder bombers are currently very weak. so here's an idea to indirectly buff them - increase the amount of land units each team spawns with, but also every time a player spawns a bomber, it summons like 4 or 5 AI controlled bombers. And your enemy won't be able to tell which is which if you fly in formation, so, like... you have suddenly a massive "vehicle" to pilot and it has 5 weak points. Sorta like a galaga fighter fleet? with more land targets, there's more score at stake, meaning some players might pick bombers too and be exposed to other, fun, [alternative-to-their-normal-mode] parts of the game. ... there are very few true windows into another part of the world. like, starcraft 2 or anime or blue jeans or cowboy hats (why am I thinking of a political compass meme) oh because memes too, dummy right windows [linux is better] wrong kind of window, nerd ... anyway as I was saying, when you play video games you're really giving people data. like, "how would people perform in these actions if they could" but like, pushing buttons on a computer is different than doing it in real life, so... your interpretations wouldn't be worth as much. ... right. because people will hear whatever they want. That's why art can change minds, but never in the same way twice - it's ================== stack overflow ================ [before I posted it I wrote this on the post]: I literally can only make this stuff when I'm stoned hey if you wanted to be accessible for blind people, you should build a screenreader that scans the words on wherever a blind person's fingers are pointing toward a tablet. like reading braille on a notebook. They could even wear a glove if they wanted to, and the tablet could scan their fingers as they signed languaged over it's close-range sensors. might be a good way to get the VR guys in on the accessibility domain, because like... seriously give a granny a backpack and suddenly she doesn't need to leave the house to hang out with her kids (boom everyone gets LLM automated) huh I wonder if I ever was a real person at all NOT GOOD so don't do it that way, dummies. >.< seriously humans are sooooo bazookas. just like, do it right the first time? duhhhhh (a more measured approach is to pick the most *important* moments and speak most clearly during those.) where was I? Oh yes accessibility need devices, like the ones you see on late-night TV (with silly names like "oops I dropped my spoon again" or "oh whoops my trouser's just can't stay up" or whatever. Y'know, accessibility needs! Why not do that instead of war all the time? like... you can still learn and research and grow and develop and become all that humanity was ever meant to be, AND you can live good lives and be honest and true and do all of the anythings that you want to. it's possible, it's plausible, and it's within reach of our sights! ================== stack overflow ================ ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┘ --- #20 notes/what-people-dont-get-about-people-like-us --- ════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── -=============================================================================- | What people don't get about people like us | | /u/Dxmmer | -=============================================================================- Intellectual Confidence. Knowing I'm Right. Blowing Past Dunning-Kruger. I remember what it was like to be like you. Here's the memes to get out. Louis Rossmann's commentary on this issue describes the phenomenology of early childhood awareness/mindfulness. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HRwuu0u3UFA "I have not forgotten my childhood experience... Kids notice everything" I think "autistic" people often have early life trauma due to literally being "smarter" (neural semantic hypergraph is highly faceted) than the adults around them, but having communication difficulties, reality and inner world become disjoint. Most get so beaten down by society that things become internalized. You see these people posting on all the help subreddits, total victims of society. Lost. They start believing the lies they were told. Everyone else is doing it, right? I found myself becoming victim to bad memes around high school into college age. I fought it all the way through: anxiety, depression, confusion, anger, jealousy. All the mistakes. They assume that everyone is like them. The less they are the more they assume others are similar. I am no one, I know everyone is me. Are you someone? To you, am I no one? Or a different someone -- lesser or greater? I feel tidal forces. You can't lie to no one. I've had free time since always. School was freetime because I'm blessed. I didn't need to listen to the teacher that much. I've always learned to trust my senses and the way I understand things. I pay attention to when the teacher makes mistakes or teaches in a way that I can tell is not landing on the class. Sometimes I ask clarification to help the class. I already taught myself different ways to understand the entire curriculum, now I'm doubling back again before the test. Yes, I know I will get an A on it. I know in the same way you know your own name. I know things like this. I'm good at math. People who are good at math know what it's like to be right. They know what that means. I get to be right about everything, all the time, even when I want to be wrong. I have a moral compulsion. I don't have much fun in life, but I have been given many gifts. -- Society needs their Chiron(s). I know who will talk to me and about what because that is who I am to them. They don't know who they are, so they don't know me. A few knew me before I knew myself, and I now them like they knew me. So when I start analyzing things like math, I run into a lot of trouble. Things don't make sense anymore. I assume I'm wrong at first. Then I do the work to check. Checking doesn't mean googling a yes/no question. It means going across any and all the resources and reading between the lines. Analyze through appropriate context. Any work, any text, apply the psychedelic lens. Apply the human condition, apply understanding of paradox as reality's edge. Understand the limitations of science, understand the duplicity of language. Understand culture, in and out. Understand your own psychology. Understand the inner conflict of good and evil in man. All of this needs to be occurring in real time on top of all the normal stuff. If you're not doing this, I can't trust you, how can I be sure you are not demon possessed, how you won't betray me at the next Godellian boundary? The idea is that models are provisional at all stages, once you've lost confidence in all models, you run through them much quicker. Iterating over more models is how science is done, you are literally mechanizing your way out of the maze. Same as how these ML algorithms will mathematically guarantee entropy min/max. Where can you apply guarantees in your own life? Understand reality as a sample space, like the green, blue red marbles. What bothers me is when people don't do the work to check things. Or they check one time, or two times, or three times. Or they check with multiple people, or multiple resources. That's not going to cut it these days. Your mind can much more than an if/else. while: True do x y z how about while: True do sample continuous decision space People "land" too often. You want to call me disabled for not wanting to do the first over and over again. What is required of us now is to understand things as pure intention. You can't write enough articles to convince me of something that isn't true, it won't happen, not anymore. I've been freed. I will free the others, too. If your model doesn't accommodate quantum woo, don't talk to me. It's only quantum "woo" for people who want to be better than the lesser, creating the dichotomy itself. Think of those low, mid, highbrow memes. The more popular something is, the more mid it is. Use the middle to perform alchemy. Memes that are implicitly reinforced by principle of reality (thinking in probability distributions is cheating, now that we know the universe is "generative" upon sampling). I think the anti-spiritualists of today will be remembered. It depends on how they act when we start organizing. Your words and opinions are not the same as mine. You have the right to be heard equally without bar from the law, yet you do nothing to ensure the opinion is solid on its own? I'm surrounded by cacophony of memes surviving (barely) in great amplification of death the confused denizens of a dying order -- dark memes. Like dark matter, we concresce and annihilate. The "light memes" are sourced by the disconnected nodes, the shamans, the schizophrenics. Those not blinded by the splendorous mirage of other pearls in the web. Are people doing this on purpose? To signal that they aren't interested in the truth? Who is? ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ |