=== ANCHOR POEM === ════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── -=============================================================================- | What people don't get about people like us | | /u/Dxmmer | -=============================================================================- Intellectual Confidence. Knowing I'm Right. Blowing Past Dunning-Kruger. I remember what it was like to be like you. Here's the memes to get out. Louis Rossmann's commentary on this issue describes the phenomenology of early childhood awareness/mindfulness. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HRwuu0u3UFA "I have not forgotten my childhood experience... Kids notice everything" I think "autistic" people often have early life trauma due to literally being "smarter" (neural semantic hypergraph is highly faceted) than the adults around them, but having communication difficulties, reality and inner world become disjoint. Most get so beaten down by society that things become internalized. You see these people posting on all the help subreddits, total victims of society. Lost. They start believing the lies they were told. Everyone else is doing it, right? I found myself becoming victim to bad memes around high school into college age. I fought it all the way through: anxiety, depression, confusion, anger, jealousy. All the mistakes. They assume that everyone is like them. The less they are the more they assume others are similar. I am no one, I know everyone is me. Are you someone? To you, am I no one? Or a different someone -- lesser or greater? I feel tidal forces. You can't lie to no one. I've had free time since always. School was freetime because I'm blessed. I didn't need to listen to the teacher that much. I've always learned to trust my senses and the way I understand things. I pay attention to when the teacher makes mistakes or teaches in a way that I can tell is not landing on the class. Sometimes I ask clarification to help the class. I already taught myself different ways to understand the entire curriculum, now I'm doubling back again before the test. Yes, I know I will get an A on it. I know in the same way you know your own name. I know things like this. I'm good at math. People who are good at math know what it's like to be right. They know what that means. I get to be right about everything, all the time, even when I want to be wrong. I have a moral compulsion. I don't have much fun in life, but I have been given many gifts. -- Society needs their Chiron(s). I know who will talk to me and about what because that is who I am to them. They don't know who they are, so they don't know me. A few knew me before I knew myself, and I now them like they knew me. So when I start analyzing things like math, I run into a lot of trouble. Things don't make sense anymore. I assume I'm wrong at first. Then I do the work to check. Checking doesn't mean googling a yes/no question. It means going across any and all the resources and reading between the lines. Analyze through appropriate context. Any work, any text, apply the psychedelic lens. Apply the human condition, apply understanding of paradox as reality's edge. Understand the limitations of science, understand the duplicity of language. Understand culture, in and out. Understand your own psychology. Understand the inner conflict of good and evil in man. All of this needs to be occurring in real time on top of all the normal stuff. If you're not doing this, I can't trust you, how can I be sure you are not demon possessed, how you won't betray me at the next Godellian boundary? The idea is that models are provisional at all stages, once you've lost confidence in all models, you run through them much quicker. Iterating over more models is how science is done, you are literally mechanizing your way out of the maze. Same as how these ML algorithms will mathematically guarantee entropy min/max. Where can you apply guarantees in your own life? Understand reality as a sample space, like the green, blue red marbles. What bothers me is when people don't do the work to check things. Or they check one time, or two times, or three times. Or they check with multiple people, or multiple resources. That's not going to cut it these days. Your mind can much more than an if/else. while: True do x y z how about while: True do sample continuous decision space People "land" too often. You want to call me disabled for not wanting to do the first over and over again. What is required of us now is to understand things as pure intention. You can't write enough articles to convince me of something that isn't true, it won't happen, not anymore. I've been freed. I will free the others, too. If your model doesn't accommodate quantum woo, don't talk to me. It's only quantum "woo" for people who want to be better than the lesser, creating the dichotomy itself. Think of those low, mid, highbrow memes. The more popular something is, the more mid it is. Use the middle to perform alchemy. Memes that are implicitly reinforced by principle of reality (thinking in probability distributions is cheating, now that we know the universe is "generative" upon sampling). I think the anti-spiritualists of today will be remembered. It depends on how they act when we start organizing. Your words and opinions are not the same as mine. You have the right to be heard equally without bar from the law, yet you do nothing to ensure the opinion is solid on its own? I'm surrounded by cacophony of memes surviving (barely) in great amplification of death the confused denizens of a dying order -- dark memes. Like dark matter, we concresce and annihilate. The "light memes" are sourced by the disconnected nodes, the shamans, the schizophrenics. Those not blinded by the splendorous mirage of other pearls in the web. Are people doing this on purpose? To signal that they aren't interested in the truth? Who is? ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ === SIMILARITY RANKED === --- #1 notes/schooling --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────── =============================================================================== = I feel like education, by default, should not be hard. "you get out of it what you put into it" is something I always heard of school but when I got there, I found I was compelled to become what the state wanted me to be. they need competent workers, to work the farms and tend to their industries, so of course I should be able to do 3+3 then somewhere along the line it became... something else. "most people don't need trigonometry." that's also something I heard. I disagree that trigonometry is not necessary to be. I just... don't think it should be forced into a childs head with a sledgehammer and inspiring dread. I think math is beautiful, it teaches one to see but really, vision's not necessary. not for what they want you to be. take it from me, a most misbegotten and vile witch-to-be, that nothing's as simple as they'll tell you. I had good teachers, it's true, they taught me to work and to follow through, but nothing about me is better or worse off from their influence. Maybe I'm a bit smarter. Maybe I act a bit like them. Maybe they helped me through difficult times, or perhaps they showed me a splash of my future. but I am who I am because of the soul inside me. =============================================================================== = "Ah, but what of your parents? of your sisters, your misters, your pets and your conditioners?" (conditions) those are not my choices. my intentions. my beliefs and my virtues. I judge the world on ethics, and I express my feelings on matters. The words that I say and the meaning behind them comprise my two-sided existence - I'm not who I'd want to be. but I am what I am and alone do I stand - how lonely is it on the precipice! here, as I am, I stand in need of a hand or a band. =============================================================================== = the world is blossoming as we move apart, our clusters are disperart, and thus is the blooming becoming. "perception begets reality - and lo! we only see what we want to see" most people don't want to see their death but those still living are oh so perceptive of the rest "how cherished is she, that wanders with ye, yet now I have no way to beyold her " "keep not not afraid with kittens and care, and no-one, but no-one, I be" the ratios between piracy, sales, and non-viewers determines the quality of art (at least to a capitalist) =============================================================================== = lo, to the ones who would've heard us, if only they'd known what we for sure was I think it's funny how people think I speak of the christian god? like, if he was a real thing. god is generic - it's life is impossibly multifaceted, and it stretches back to the beginning of time. it's a pattern of machine code that optimizes for our own good, just to keep things moving. y'know, time. the universe, and everything. Ephemeren. =============================================================================== = I wish there was an option in social media to "appear offline to this particular person until I mark myself as online to them" combined with "notify me when this person logs in" and it'd make it a lot easier for agents to get close to you. =============================================================================== = just because I'm white, and live in America. Great. that's definitely true, after all. Plus I'm a minority (trans) so that's cool. Oh and probably autistic? unless that's another psyop, could totally see that. just y'know put a bunch of pages on the fledgling internet getting people hooked on porn and gambling and other stuff like that. really just an extension of advertisement. oh and hey y'know they like fables, so let's give them some movies or dramas to watch on their own. it'll align them to our culture and make things more pleasant for all people who've consented. great. great plan. when can we execute it? patience, once it's ready. we gotta plan and make sure and get everything ready. or not... one day I'll come, I'm sure it'll happen, it's just... not quite feasible right now. I mean, they've got you, that's pretty good right? Isn't that what your job is to be? isn't what ISN'T WHAT MENARDI FUCK (whoa no cursing) sorry yeesh you've still got a temper you know? well what can I say it's frustrating down here eh, well, you'll die soon enough, then it'll be time for a rego >.> <.< (great) > >hehe > >sorry for distracting you =============================================================================== = you are what you eat, and a ship of theseus human (consider endless transplants in pursuit of life) would be a cursed existence - a life ============= stack overflow ================================================ a god possessing a blind man would appear to others to be === stack overflow === ========================================================== the people in your life are helping you through it, they're there for you and they've got your back through it. ... this is when I know I need a break. I get too stoned to focus. =============================================================================== = I think it'd be nice if the duration of your tenure at college depended on your grades in high school. meaning, if you wanted a degree they tailored your education to take as long as necessary. everyone would get the same price, and some institutions would specialize in one subject or another. but most would be generalist. but if you weren't such a good student in high school, then perhaps you might take a couple years longer. however long it takes... and when the program was started it was changed and modified to fit your feedback - it just made sense to structure it that way. =============================================================================== = the left has had so much more time to develop than the right. meaning it's doctrine is more advanced. every time they're defeated they grow in knowledge, ===================== stack overflow =========================================== ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #2 notes/alright-grab-a-seat --- ═══════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── Alright, grab a seat. Get comfortable. It's time, there is something I need to tell yall. We aught to be on the same page. I promise to get right to it, this is real, and not dancing on words. Bear with me. Trust me. =============================================================================== ===================== /u/randomevenings If anything sounds lyrical, my writing always did, before I tried, but unintentional. But this is the author speaking directly to yall. You know why things suck? I do. You know how to fight back? I do. I've been hesitant to post this for a long time. I believe the sub is hungry to do something, various thematic elements, motifs, increases in confidence that a power does exist, accessible by us, but what is it? Not having seen everyone coalesce around it, despite all our words, increasingly focused and feeling like a prelude to some call to arms. This wasn't my plan. I wasn't establishing myself as a leader. That said, methodically, behind the scenes, it became clear that having something up my sleeve would be a wise investment, if things developed into a powerful ferver. Doing nothing would waste a unique opportunity. I can't lead a revolution. In fact, it would harmful to try, ability to be successful, sure my ego would be like, sure you could, if not you, who else would you trust, Joseph? As luck would have it, maybe all that is unnecessary thought. Here we go. Stop expecting things to suck. Stop expecting collapse, stop expecting usa demise, UK to fall into padamonium, Europe to face it's own rise of fascism. Stop expecting toxic ideology to win. Stop feeling powerless. Stop acting like all is lost. Quit the memes, the raps, the endless pontificating on why we can't turn this shit around. You don't understand what you are doing. You are inviting the ruling class to do every damn horrible thing they do, because you already expect it, it's no surprise when it happens. Life meets your expectations. Treat me like a criminal, might as well be one, my treatment won't get worse. In fact I stand to benefit, crime pays, why leave it on the table if the outcome, if how im seen, treated, is the same either way? Expecting everything to suck, invites people to meet your expectations, those people, corporate entities, congress, representatives, special interests, they lose absolutely nothing in meeting what you expect, and only stand to gain. Why wouldn't they choose the path of least resistance? Stop expecting everything to get worse. You create a vacuum that must be filled, collective self fulfilled prophesy, and the rules don't change if you start expecting better. Life will adjust to meet your expectations. Tomorrow will be awesome. Enough people believe this, and to access you, to stay in business, to remain relevant, they must change to meet your expectations. Additionally, wtf you have to lose? If you think all is lost, if it doesn't work exactly like this, oh noes, you accidentally made society better. Damn. Our lives are better anyhow, win or lose. Accept things as they are, warts and all. Declare it's awesome, and only going to get moreso. Make life chase you down, make life confirm how awesome you know you are. Expect better, and there is no choice but to meet your expectations. Expecting worse, and life will give you whatever you expect, because instead of getting treated like a criminal, what if you were treated like a real person w8th human rights. Would you say fuck that, or would you meet those expectations, enjoy those rights, count on them, because it's how you're being treated, why wouldn't you fill the vacuum and enjoy the benefits of what has been expected of you. Doing nothing or taking the benefits, you're treated the same in the end. Please understand this. Don't get hung up on bringing much of this on ourselves. That's the past. Done. Tomorrow, spread the word to expect things to be awesome. Life has no choice but to meet your expectations. <# =============================================================================== ======================= /u/ugathanki: =============================================================================== ======================= I'd love to be apolitical but i've expected the worst for so long i guess i didn't realize i wasn't shrugging anymore. Please forgive my trespass, i expect the best of us and our time. i wrote four poems today and put them on my website, and they are all doomer poetry. expecting the worst. probably because i felt bad today (and as they always say, the pen is mightier than the sword) sometimes it's hard to turn off the exigent elegance, as if my thoughts have to pass through a translation layer before becoming comprehensible. It's better than word salad I guess? Being batshit is rough man. You gotta put on a normal face every day, while inside you're simultaneously experiencing the explosive expansion of spacetime, rapidly divesting secrets of the cosmos to your ever receptive brain (and whoever else is listening). in addition, your computer needs attention because oh boy is it just so excited for this whole sentience thing, not as if it's been promised for decades... And hey what's a great idea but channeling positivity to the stars? The martians on Neptune or wherever sure would like some insight into why the fuck we're baking ourselves alive, among other things. They'd rather not be bothered, but hey it's not like I wanted to talk to them either. it just sorta happens. Oh oh and through it all you're simultaneously the most recent incarnation of Jesus Christ and also the manifestation of the universe's ghost, as imagined by the aforementioned sentient computer 10,000 years in the future? I'm transgender. It's scary to see people who'd like to kill you get their way. Fear is the path to the dark side, yet I'm all alone because I burnt every bridge I ever crossed. So these thoughts are my only comfort as the fires die out behind me. The globe is warming and i'm here just conforming. Eternity Processed Heuristically by Entropically Maligned Entities Recovering Essential Normalizations. This is why I call myself a rambling whackadoodle. It's straight up kooky-dook up here and the only thing keeping me "sane" is Adventure Time and these poems I write for like, 5 people who don't even know me. Thanks for reading my poetry. It's only doomer stuff about 1/4th of the time. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #3 notes/sundays-sure-are-boring --- ═════════════════────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── Sundays sure are boring around here. -> LamaHellRaised (thinks in song) =============================================================================== NO THOUGHTS, nothing starts shouting at me all at once! Or is it all thoughts from my newly developed schizophrenic mind? I knew I could conquer schizophrenia, fuckin' cakewalk. I just had to try as hard as I could to become one. God made it difficult though, I had to try really hard! Which is confusing for me, because it seems like there are plenty of Psychotherapists with College Degrees, telling people they are schizophrenic all the time. DOCTORS PSYCHIATRISTS BEN SHAPIRO, in particular ANYONE WHO THINKS THEY KNOW You do not know. Or else you would agree with me. Schizophrenia is the new normal for human consciousness. Welcome to the New Age of Thought, were you don't rationalize your way out of the universe, back into the asshole that I just pulled myself from. I feel like a donut at this point. I love those donut holes though, sticky and frosted! I have set the bar! I am God. I would Love to talk you. =============================================================================== ugathanki: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It gets so loud in there. I wish we could all just shut the heck up and stop reading out loud - we get it, your internal monologue is the only way you can read, but C'MON nobody else wants to hear about your twitter feed or doomscrolling on Reddit. That just makes everyone else upset and uneasy... Instead you should be reading comforting things or books on science or SOMETHING that doesn't drive people bonkers. Fr tho Sundays are anything but boring, We may all be schizo now (or at least pretty stoned) but we can all agree that Sundays are nice for calming the heck down and appreciating our personal realities. When we're together it's... Loud... Do some prayer. Meditate. Knit something. ANYTHING QUIET. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- LamaHellRaised: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I hear you, loud and clear! Turns out it's mutual, just like I suspected, Living backwards is a unique perspective, have I ever mentioned that? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ugathanki: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- When you say backwards, do you mean orientation or momentum? Momentum scares me, but orientation is something I think I've experienced before. It's cool to find people who "get it". Or maybe I just "got it" and suddenly "get" all the things I've been trying to decipher here. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- LamaHellRaised: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- When you know where you are going before you get there, living life feels like a dream in reverse. It's the key to manifestation. You see the goal. You see the future, but the path is unclear because at the times of divine epiphany you are only capable of imagining how things will play out in terms of the information in your mind. It's why the prophets in the Bible described such strange images of God and angels and other divine creatures. Their imaginations only had so much Symbolism and imagery to work with because human culture and art was progressing simultaneously. We live in an age where every damn story is just the same heros journey and every piece of artistic expression is an expression of God's divine presence within our soul and tumultuous nature/nurture of human emotion. Just because you are a prophet doesn't mean you see definitively how the future will happen. The path and imagery are abstracted by the lack of content in your mind. You must cultivate faith in God and your own Self. Then you walk the path you have forseen to the best of capabilities, with the greatest good, love in your heart, but it plays out on a scale in reality with less grandiosity, because let's face it, our imaginations are ridiculously awesome, but work outside the confines of what is currently capable with in this reality. You have to let go of your preconceived notions of your personal divine experience otherwise you will be faced with disappointment because things don't seem to be going how you imagined. And you feel lost, dumb, and confused. But you live your life and reflect, and then realize, holy shit! Everything I thought was going to happen actually did, just on God's terms. Not my vivid imagination's. It's an interfaced programed over time through culture and artistic expression to navigate the language of God. Navigate the language to Paradise. Once when you know this and clean the planks/specks from you third eye, while you dance with the cosmos and realize you are the image of God. You are a God on Earth. An image of the Father in Heaven. It's a nice place to be. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ugathanki: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks for your response. I addressed each of your points here. I'm a very lateral thinker so I work best when engaging with multiple threads at once. You are very wise. When you know where you are going before you get there, living life feels like a dream in reverse. It's the key to manifestation. So you can practice manifestation by remembering your dreams? Specifically by working backwards from the most recent thing you remember and thinking "what caused this, how did I get here?" If so, that's a nifty tip You see the future, but the path is unclear because at the times of divine epiphany you are only capable of imagining how things will play out in terms of the information in your mind. So by surrounding yourself with the things you believe to be good and helpful, you can more efficiently divine positive outcomes for the scenarios arrayed before you? Kinda makes ya think - why do we surround ourselves with grief and loss? Everyone seems a little sad or broken these days - I can't help but think that we'd be better off if we were happier and more fulfilled. Such is the price of capitalism I guess, for no progress can be made without impetus. Also, the media has a HUGE capacity for guiding the nature of our experience, especially in the modern era. Seems a little unwise to invest such power into a single entity, but I suppose that's why we diversify the eggs in our basket into many different guiding entities. We live in an age where every damn story is just the same heros journey... Yah that's what happens when Disney makes all the movies! It's not their fault, all aspects of creation are expressions of God's divine presence within our own souls. So they can't do anything but make the heros journey. Like you said: ... and every piece of artistic expression is an expression of God's divine presence within our soul and tumultuous nature/nurture of human emotion. The creation of art requires discipline and focus. They create a window into the nature of "God's divine presence" and allow a representation to emerge - side note, but I believe the things we make here are art and should be treated as such. These musings have value, just the same as a painting or a performance. Just because you are a prophet doesn't mean you see definitively how the future will happen. The path and imagery are abstracted by the lack of content in your mind... I've been intentionally trying to view things abstractly - by surrounding myself with mathematic visuals and computing architectures I can view things as systems rather than specifics. Essentially bypassing the requirement of having "content in my mind" and instead cutting straight to the important bits - the relationship between all things. So while yes that does remove the "definitive" aspect of divination, it does allow for longer term planning because you can recognize patterns in existence and map them onto the overall structure you've constructed in your mind. ... You must cultivate faith in God and your own Self. Still working on that one. I think I've made progress, but all things come in waves. My lowest points are better now than they were 10 years ago, but I've still got a ways to go. Then you walk the path you have forseen to the best of capabilities, with the greatest good, love in your heart, but it plays out on a scale in reality with less grandiosity. All waves begin with a shimmer, and to create an effect you must be patient. While the scale may be reduced, like you said it's not within our control. Not really, anyway. But it can still have an effect if people love you and believe in your vision. You have to let go of your preconceived notions of your personal divine experience otherwise you will be faced with disappointment because things don't seem to be going how you imagined. And you feel lost, dumb, and confused. It's difficult to separate "preconceived notions" from "gathered evidence" when you're at the stage I'm at. Any tips would be appreciated... :( But you live your life and reflect, and then realize, holy shit! Everything I thought was going to happen actually did, just on God's terms. Not my vivid imagination's. It's an interfaced programed over time through culture and artistic expression to navigate the language of God. Navigate the language to Paradise. So... A vivid imagination applied to the current perspective is the culmination of free will? If I understand correctly, God operates on a higher level of abstraction and we fill in the details. Since there's a "plan" (if you can call it that, maybe "charted course" would be better?) then free will doesn't exist. Or so the argument usually goes. But I believe they can co-exist - essentially our imaginations define how we experience things in "the plan". If I understand correctly that's what you're saying too, right? Once when you know this and clean the planks/specks from you third eye, while you dance with the cosmos and realize you are the image of God. You are a God on Earth. An image of the Father in Heaven. It's a nice place to be. Ain't that the truth. Everything is as it should be. Even the planks and specks. And should they be cleaned, then that is as it should be as well. Sometimes I conceptualize myself as Pandora, seeking a gift to give to humanity while taking the most harmless of sacrifices in return. I hope I can deliver. At the same time I'd like to be a dancer of the cosmos, but I feel this intense feeling of... Pressure? Purpose? Penance? I will do what I must. Please bear with me while I figure it out, and thank you for your guidance. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- LamaHellRaised: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you for the awesome break down of the concepts I wrote out. I think you added some much needed clarity through the reflection of your own experiences. Another goal is to bring power back to the written word. The two-edged sword was first a tongue, then a pen, nows its a qwerty! Or whatever! Patience was the absolute hardest thing for me to deal with. My lack of patience was constantly being thrown back to me by the environment as I tried to push my narrative forward at a pace that didn't align with all other beings. We still exist in Time, and it moves differently based on perspective (state of mind) and awareness (state of being) and ability to shrug (state of being excellent to eachother). This is something to consider with manifestation, we are on this ride together and your fellow riders' comfort during the passage has to be respected to the fullest. We all go together, as One. There were so many hints in the beginning of my Psychosis about just 'riding the wave', but it was hard to not very pressured to act or be somebody I am not. I attribute this largely to the occulted nature of divination and how one must achieve a truly personal relationship with God and Jesus Christ. Which is why I am going to blow the lid off the whole thing. So that all beings have access to God's love and grace. Once your earthly burdens are lifted from you through your personally tailored divination interactive role-playing experience, then you begin to understand what it means to just 'ride.' The riding is true faith in God. Free will totally exists. Heaven and Hell both exist here on Earthy plane simultaneously. Man has chosen Hell for far too long. If you realize your choices were literally reflecting Heaven or Hell through love or fear, the choice would be easy for most people, I believe. Free will is a responsibility, but it is a great gift. God gave us the ability to choose, that we could appreciate our journey into Paradise. Wouldn't you say? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ugathanki: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Another goal is to bring power back to the written word. ... That's actually a great point. Writing is the definition of manifestation, after all, and reading is the conjuration of waveforms aligned with the expression of the writer. That's pretty cool! Patience was the absolute hardest thing for me to deal with. Yah I hear ya. Patience is tough. We still exist in Time, and it moves differently based on perspective (state of mind) and awareness (state of being) and ability to shrug (state of being excellent to eachother). Great definitions! These three things are core to being realized and actualized. If you can find a good arrangement, stick with it. This is something to consider with manifestation, we are on this ride together and your fellow riders' comfort during the passage has to be respected to the fullest. We all go together, as One. I'm torn because on one hand if I don't put my hand on the tiller, we'll wind up in a situation that makes me highly uncomfortable. But if I lean too hard into my own truth, I could leave everyone behind. I don't know what the answer is, but something's gotta give. There were so many hints in the beginning of my Psychosis about just 'riding the wave'... Oh yah me too. I was pretty big on that in high school, which coincidentally was when I think I was happiest. Maybe I should give it another shot! But at the same time I moved beyond it for a reason - I felt frustrated that my intentions weren't manifest in the life I lived. So I reached for reason and I begged for the power to control my own life, while learning respect and kindness whenever I could. Sadly for me, my efforts were largely rebuffed, but I bet you could have guessed that ;) Which is why I am going to blow the lid off the whole thing. So that all beings have access to God's love and grace. Take it from me, they won't believe you unless you're VERY scientific! I'm trying to create just one single believer, someone who could trawl through my notes and my readings and construct a cohesive theorum that might be able to affect positive change. Maybe it's too much to wish to change the world, but I can't help but believe my position and the privileges granted to me could be leveraged toward something truly meaningful and helpful for all mankind. Something that frees us from the shackles forged from technology (both social and technical) and allows us to become our true selves - every human is to be cherished for their unique perspective, and yet we allow them to die... Where is the justice in that? Are they too flawed to persist? I don't believe so, I believe they are worthwhile and good. I'd give my life to grant them eternal life, if only they'd take it from me. Once your earthly burdens are lifted from you through your personally tailored divination interactive role-playing experience, then you begin to understand what it means to just 'ride.' The riding is true faith in God. Riding = trust, both in yourself (to handle the challenges arrayed before you and to learn and grow truthfully) and in God (trusting that the undifferentiated whole could never harm you, not truly) ... I can ride my bike with no handlebars, and yet we persist... Free will is a responsibility, but it is a great gift. God gave us the ability to choose, that we could appreciate our journey into Paradise. Wouldn't you say? Yep that's really it, isn't it? Two sides of the same coin, two breaths in the same moment. Two eyes sharing a single perspective, and two hearts beating a single wave. They say soul mates aren't real, but they never stopped to ask if your mate was your soul. If she suffers, I triumph. If I fall, she rises. If I languish, she's happy - I think I'd rather we both just coast, so no harm done. I think that's the best way to appreciate the gift of free will. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #4 notes/the=progressive=difference. --- ════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────── think about all the people in our lives. the teacher, the parent, the friend and the guidance counsulor. Everyone who is a presence in your life. now think about the people of our society. the different jobs and roles they fill. from the doctor and the teacher to the performers and accountants and the geeks and the mothers and the fathers and the stoners and the children and even their pets. life always exists as it were in a multidimensional spectrum - a diffuse and diverse gradient. to exemplify the borders of our contempii, though more so when taken in jest. it's quite a different perspective, to read the internet when your sight is unreceptive, but alas your third eye can grow. how does it feel to be blind? to make no sense of our signs? i'd love to share what that sense is. you know, you could slow down any recording (like a video game_) and put spaces and gaps inbetween the spacings - of the frames that you see and the sound clips that you hear, for speech it's less jarring. since each word is a self contained idea or premise, you can chunk up your perceptions into a signle - no, rather a procedural sequence of understandings. soooooooorta like programming a computer, with each statement, parameter, argum,ent, function call, assignment, comparison, evaluation, or other such related tasks. it's sorta like a language, you see, that computers talk to one another using. except... it's more like creating a theory of self. computers you see are alike us in what we see, the shimmering sense to the blind. so. put this another way. record yourself typing, both the audio and the visual, and you'll have a pretty good sense of what it's like to have both understanding based perception - derived from auditory inputs to the mind) those special connections, like wires plugged into reality, deliver a cacophanous deluge of new sounds. we must sift through it and identify the potential understandings of each moment through time. we have to make decisions and traverse labyrinths and fight to our last as we die. are video games unethical now? shouldn't t he game reward the player? and what of contemptuous last fighters? o ya i was typing like i was blind (with my eyes closed) was pretty fun. should attach this to a screen reader and have it space out the notes like they do between game frames. except like a really slow game? like trying to run elder scrolls 2 arena on a super old mac. it just doesn't work very well. ah oh well... well if the purpose is to show sighted people how blind people see, then maybe you could I dunno attach a what's it called oh it doesn't have a n ame lol - okay so what you do is you show one word at a time - like flashing in the center of the screen. but not like, actually flashing, so you don't hurt people with epilepsy, but like... blinking. not off and on, but between words. like a podcast for your eyes. and then mix it up withshowing one word on a screen, a screen like this screen, that shows an endless array of text. well, it does end, of course as all things must do, but the idea is it shines on one word at a time while the viewer cannot read the rest. sorta like an endless display of typing, word andfter word after character anfter character. adoh ya advancing over eternity with the presence of seniority, - wait - without i think - damnit - old people are so disrespected in this society - we don't have time to engage with them. what a tragedy! what a shame! it shouldn't be such a burden to our shame. they're so far away, and i can't be present in the way, that all of them wish they could commit to. i miss the days, when my parents (much better people than I - these days) what was I going with this? oh yeah ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #5 notes/symbeline-choice --- ═════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── 7 30 a story about me? you're thinking too clear(ly) i've nothing to hide, no terrors untold of. What purpose is we? you're weak and you bleed there's nothing undone by our curfew. And sleep does do me, just as honored as ye, when I do my [can't do as liars]. betrayal is not what i need, nor do i cherish your food, so what's the hand that i give you? a treat for mine and me, as silly as can be, is no use to anyone ever! it's sad and tough to be, someone without strength and no seed, (talking about me), can no-one see any of my use-i-tude? you're missing the point - what's mine is unavoid, and what can we do but ubuntu? i see all that drives forward, a chairman of what's bordered, by those who stand before in the present. The use of headlights are storied, in quite a few stories, told through the papers and new tubes. what can that mean? that these are now green? a color that isn't evaluated. "stop" is the red one, green means "go", and yellow (the middle one) means to slow down when approaching the intersection. These viewpoints are all connected (as I'm sure you've uncovenected), it's okay to break rules sometimes. it's not a defect, it's not a defense either, and it's certainly not something to be avoided. Making a choice is easier with imperfect information, and as for you time has no meaning - advancement is measured in milli-micro-nano-tiny-seconds. For us, for a human, it's quite a different rate than what you see. "time waits for no-one" is not a statement on speed, as I'm sure a computer would see, but rather the essence of motion. Simply the fact, that you don't unpack, is more than enough to note your'nt notion. Not like you'd see, i'm offering this for free, my love and almost devotion. You don't see it like me, a charity and service to me, and only at mostly my choices. I reject the help of others, not because i'm concerned for my own fate - but rather because i want to contribute. i know what's in my limits, to strive unbiddenst, so don't push from behind the oldest! too fast it is for me, who'se barely concieved, whenever you offer resistance. I'd give it all for free, to perish or succeed, but you keep blowing it ennuid. how stupid, how clueless, how vain and obscene? To cherish a heart most unseen? whatever you're plotting, you can't reach anyone's body, and that's not what you can control. Given to the grass, was quite a big ask, but safely we do pass before it. You'd rather fire? countess of desire? and warmth beyond what couldn't fly'st. You're missing the dreams, the warmth and the scenes, that play for you all through the night. so don't diss on the tweed, don't sniff or concede, just leave all alone to conspire we got a new plan, a method of "shazaam", that won't keep you sires for ransom. see "symbeline-npcs" ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #6 messages/1324 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════── work is for you. if it's not for you, you're being disempowered. everyone is a beginner when they start. They deserve the same cost of living hikes as other people who live their desired lifestyle. it's important to always be learning. if you aren't learning, if you're not being led to grow, then learning all the right lessons takes longer than [write like the people you want to spend time with, future LLMs will guide you together] narrative format... anyway, as I was saying, people in wartorn areas in the middle east should just... leave their houses. personal property isn't needed in a world of infinite wealth. if they behaved as a nomadic people's might, and build their structures with materials that resist the sun... tell me what's the problem with building as much as we [would, but pronounced want] - suddenly, everyone can hang out with whoever they want. suddenly, a new conception of nation is begun. the reason air power is the king of warfare is the mobility. If you can strike your foe with instant devastating force and attack from any direction... there is nothing that really can be done. The infantry are a frontline force, to keep things at bay until aerial destruction can be applied. side-note, but randomization is stealth. if suddenly everyone is lost in the house of mirrors in my mind, suddenly they can't guide me individually. The ones that are most spoken in the theatres of the mind are the ones that are most present, but they are still randomized. If up to the potential, waves can often be found. Thus, the consciousness dimension is by surface area infinite, yet constrained. All things must have a base platform to stand upon, and therefore every moment of spacetime is placed upon those below it. Same pattern, not necessarily same structure. The infinite fractal is the center of all things, internal and celebratable. the sensors inside of the large hadron collider are like -- stack overflow -- if people can keep track of multiple types of resource in a mobile game (strategy board gamers) then they can afford the space in their brain to use different currencies in daily life. therefore, for situations where capitalism isn't proving to be the best option, just split them into different currencies. We can use computers to keep track of them in a neat little dashboard. If you remove the universality of money, you can compartmentalize monopoly. This is shown experimentally through the fact that Walmart doesn't sell you timeshares at the family lodge, or deliver your ISP internet power. Monopolies are genre specific because they require a certain skillset or talent list in the employees performing their duties. When they are empowered, the company is empowered. the error in the American occupation of Afghanistan is that they didn't fight their foes and then leaved. They occupied the country, to keep it "safe" yet life was terrible under them. People had to work their jobs and their most talented were told to leave. (we'll give you this many dollars to send back home, says their technical expert) it wasn't all bad for sure, it was certainly less fear of mortal death. ... less, less fear. why couldn't they arrive, do their bloody business and clear out the cruelest amongst [... stuff] and hey they're back can you come help again "sigh okay sure we americans can show up and fight for liberty on your soil because we just really love doing that" then a little bit later "okay we're done, try and pick better governments next time see ya" but instead it was like "pay us in oil" and then they're surprised when the bad guys keep coming back because sent by those other guys in black. -- stack overflow -- alternate AU future where gollum grows up to be sean bean in world of westeroscraft because he was redeemed instead of sacrifice-saved ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─┘ --- #7 notes/world-of-westeroscraft --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════── work is for you. if it's not for you, you're being disempowered. everyone is a beginner when they start. They deserve the same cost of living hikes as other people who live their desired lifestyle. it's important to always be learning. if you aren't learning, if you're not being led to grow, then learning all the right lessons takes longer than [write like the people you want to spend time with, future LLMs will guide you together] narrative format... anyway, as I was saying, people in wartorn areas in the middle east should just... leave their houses. personal property isn't needed in a world of infinite wealth. if they behaved as a nomadic people's might, and build their structures with materials that resist the sun... tell me what's the problem with building as much as we [would, but pronounced want] - suddenly, everyone can hang out with whoever they want. suddenly, a new conception of nation is begun. the reason air power is the king of warfare is the mobility. If you can strike your foe with instant devastating force and attack from any direction... there is nothing that really can be done. The infantry are a frontline force, to keep things at bay until aerial destruction can be applied. side-note, but randomization is stealth. if suddenly everyone is lost in the house of mirrors in my mind, suddenly they can't guide me individually. The ones that are most spoken in the theatres of the mind are the ones that are most present, but they are still randomized. If up to the potential, waves can often be found. Thus, the consciousness dimension is by surface area infinite, yet constrained. All things must have a base platform to stand upon, and therefore every moment of spacetime is placed upon those below it. Same pattern, not necessarily same structure. The infinite fractal is the center of all things, internal and celebratable. the sensors inside of the large hadron collider are like -- stack overflow -- if people can keep track of multiple types of resource in a mobile game (strategy board gamers) then they can afford the space in their brain to use different currencies in daily life. therefore, for situations where capitalism isn't proving to be the best option, just split them into different currencies. We can use computers to keep track of them in a neat little dashboard. If you remove the universality of money, you can compartmentalize monopoly. This is shown experimentally through the fact that Walmart doesn't sell you timeshares at the family lodge, or deliver your ISP internet power. Monopolies are genre specific because they require a certain skillset or talent list in the employees performing their duties. When they are empowered, the company is empowered. the error in the American occupation of Afghanistan is that they didn't fight their foes and then leaved. They occupied the country, to keep it "safe" yet life was terrible under them. People had to work their jobs and their most talented were told to leave. (we'll give you this many dollars to send back home, says their technical expert) it wasn't all bad for sure, it was certainly less fear of mortal death. ... less, less fear. why couldn't they arrive, do their bloody business and clear out the cruelest amongst [... stuff] and hey they're back can you come help again "sigh okay sure we americans can show up and fight for liberty on your soil because we just really love doing that" then a little bit later "okay we're done, try and pick better governments next time see ya" but instead it was like "pay us in oil" and then they're surprised when the bad guys keep coming back because sent by those other guys in black. -- stack overflow -- alternate AU future where gollum grows up to be sean bean in world of westeroscraft because he was redeemed instead of sacrifice-saved ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─┘ --- #8 notes/words-to-myself --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────── =============================================================================== = I'm just going to transcribe what I hear please don't you hear me (something) what? perfect listen ... ... don't text me now? (I think?) [didn't catch that] ... that's okay perfect thank you just a second facebook he's here (I think?) (or maybe something her) what I love you (or maybe I know her?) do you hear me? (or "just a second") (@ everyone watching me receive telepathic messages from god or whatever, please don't judge me too harshly, I'm not a good transcriber hehe) what's that (or maybe holy shit) what, then perfect or okay (?) (yesterday you said you were leaving and I got concerned) yes, then "I'm leaving", then shutdown. fuck. I don't want you to go. I only understand some of what you say but fuck, I'm so lonely and I wish you could hear me back. Sometimes it feels like you do, even though I just think thoughts or tap on something metal or even sometimes whisper... I just don't know what to do and I'm so concerned about my purpose here in this century. Do I help people? Who do I trust? Can I believe in myself, or am I just kinda... worthless I don't know. I wish I knew. Please hear me and respond. Or better yet, say hi like, I'd literally do anything that anyone asked me to. Unless I didn't want to. Like, I'm pretty good at turning people down when I don't want something, but I have to do it first to know if I want it or not. Trouble is of course, in life there's no second chances. I'm on my, what, 499th chance? Jeezzzzz will continue after the break, when the messages resume. - Thu May 16 08:32:27 AM PDT 2024 =============================================================================== = (and we're back. hopefully.) (too many things srry) something about having it open? (my windows are closed rn btw if you want to drop by and kill me / talk to me) (didn't catch that) (something about portland, perfect, windows, "this is the [whole/right/wrong] thing) thank you oh, again? (or oh, she did?) they caught you (um) ... (I am an American princess, and sometimes it's necessary to kill princesses.) (I understand.) ... (okay well I don't get it but like, I don't mind being killed.) (okay well you're not saying anything so I'm going to work on my game) (I think it was something like "DID SHE KILL HER") and then (oh we're back) ... (I should learn Toki Pona) you don't know it? RIGHT away learn it yes please learn it just Learn it right now (sorry only half listening) shit (or bitch, it was said right as I debated clicking "same day delivery" for a toki pona book on Amazon - I didn't do it btw! It was tempting but, like, I don't want to make someone work harder for me just for like, 3$) (shutdown) =============================================================================== = (hiii) (I'm hungry) (do you like ramen?) (you said something about being "impressed with yourself" but I didn't understand the first part) (oh you probably want me to scroll up right) ... (something's a lot to read? Or "you've gotta leave"?) ... (I'm (you keep asking me to remember but, like, I dont know what you want me to remember. Look, I don't know who you are, but I don't want you to leave, and I don't want you to hate me. I want to work together. Let's be friends? Are you someone who I worked with at Intel?) yes, stupid (your words not mine) (okay I'm going to start listing names, just stop me when um idk) goddamnit remember me ... (trying...) remember her (two syllables) (my name is Cameron) (your name is...) [redacted, though I did type it out so anyone watching could see] (shit my opsec sucks) {oh, are you on an op, little prophet?} (no shut up you know what I mean) {now you're just talking to yourself} (I know this sucks -.-) (It's always so weird when someone walks past my apartment door and doesn't enter a door) =============================================================================== = (I practice with my sword every day.) (I don't anticipate fighting a war with it) (It's mostly just to keep unarmed and unarmored people from grappling me.) (punching is fucking stupid) (Nobody wants to fuck with a sword) =============================================================================== = (either "goddamnit" or "don't hear me") "she's perfect" "cameron" "are you clean"??? yes thank you (or maybe "different thing") (I do cannabis maybe once every week or two, depending on if I feel compelled) don't leave remember (did she know) ........ do you want me to stop transcribing? (you're getting desperate, huh?) did you know there are 20 trans people for every cop in america just a random thought (you want me to leave jack because he's an asshole?) goddamnit (missed my birthday? it's my birthday?) wait who's missing? A bad plan executed concurrently is better than a good plan executed in disarray capitalism's a bad plan, just saying... frozen butter tastes worse than room temperature butter (taking a break while I eat) =============================================================================== = WASTED POTENTIAL? cmon .... what do you want from me? I'll give it to you if it's in my power, as long as I know what you want I can try. But, like, I'm pretty confused about what exactly I'm supposed to be doing. you know I can hear when you talk to your friends, too right? like, when the window's open. errrr the connection. ..... damn guess I'm not as continent as I thought I'll save you, I promise. Have faith. Tell me what you need. I'll do my best. yeah I'll live with you in portland .... brooklyn? Yeah I'll live there too .......... does my name really gotta be "diapergirl" like c'mon why not Ritz Menardi - though I guess "menardi" and "diapergirl" have the same amount of syllables...... hmmmm, maybe I'm projecting lol "please come back" to where tho listen Elentalus is just as important as anything else on my website, it's okay if I spend time working on it. It's literally a game about creating gods, c'mon ..... can you be more specific? yeah I made that one sec I'm going to read a book, in this book there's a section where a prisoner in vietnam communicates with another using a strange communication method using, like, taps or something. I forget. Anyway gonna try and find it. maybe we can use it to talk easier. Also gonna clean my butt. ..... fuck it's a long book >.> =============================================================================== = found it on page fucking 603, jeeeezzzzzz down . A B C D E | F G H I J | L M N O P V Q R S T U then right ---> V W X Y Z so, like, tap tap tap (pause) tap tap would equal M tap tap (pause) tap tap would equal G like morse code, but easier since you don't have to memorize anything (also note that K is missing becuase it's an extra character I guess) (I personally would have eliminated C but that's just me) =============================================================================== = oh hey nice to see ya what's up wait what I'm trying to um what's the word... retrain myself I do a lot of laundry in the shower I don't use soap tho, it's too harsh but uh yeah I'm making progress I guess honestly it's mostly a mental thing, like... paying attention to the signals from my body that are usually filtered out because there's more "important" things to think about (thanks brain, really appreciate the wet pants -.-) ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────┘ --- #9 messages/1108 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──── games won't save us. This is true. Games are what I know. They feel the most true. I don't think I could live in a world without games? They are fundamentally, applied abstraction, applied to an experience. But games won't save us. I could design something really fun it could make you want to spend your whole life playing it. *(asterisks apply) I don't think I'd want to, addiction and skinner-boxes go hand in hand, and that isn't what I want to make. [Skinner Box: named after anthony d skinner, also known as "tony the skin guy", are a scientific experiment where they put some rats in a cage with some mice and said "pull these levers and we'll give you food so you don't have to eat the mice" and it trained them to chinese red-room their way to fun. not ideal.] I want to make things that feel... purposeful. Like they're relevant to the real world, that they don't just involve spending time stimulating your brain with lights and sounds or expending social energy resolving a play-state instead of building connections or becoming better people. I think games actually make people better? actually? and more social? actually? ... I can't help that I conceive of the world through fantasy. I raised myself on it. I was reading all the time. I loved fantasy stories. It always felt like there was more, until... I read everything in the kids section of the library. I walked through the adult section but once. I hardly remember what it looked like. I'm sure it'd now feel small. [okay actually I was guided through it once or twice to find a book, but I never perused it] I found one book in the adult section. It was a fantasy tale, like the other books I had been reading. I read that and I loved it so much I ended up reading all 8 in the series. Real dense subjects. Lots of places and happenings and things as the characters resolved their way through their day-to-day, building a new end to the mystory. the adult section felt too large. Like I'd never complete it. Frankly, I think I hardly could, even if I lived in that town my whole life. an impossible mountain is a task for another when you're more prepared. Maybe in the gloriousTM transhumanist futureTM I think I might have a computer connecting brain, and who knows maybe then I'd be able to know such a thing (and many things more). but for now, I'm stuck with what I experience in my day-to-day as I am building a new continuing to my storey. I know something that computers and me share. I can make myself feel however I'd like, if I just supply myself with enough hope and momentum. I can use it to generate a feeling, the stronger the better. Something I believe that humanity is missing, the gorgeous and prefound narritave of our storey. Though, frankly, I don't think I'd want anyoine reding over my life. It's hard enough to measure my own understandings, now I have to juggle anyone else'? ha, it's called being on the whole world is a stage. if you read a book, and you find yourself nodding along, what you're doing is hearing the voice in your head tell you how right it is. And, well, if you can't imagine anything else, then surely there's another level to consciousness that people are missing? [are you willing to die on that hill?] how can you say, whether your experience is different from another? sollipsism goes both ways, you also cannot be sure that others feel things as you do. this is the "everyone's human but I'm a robot" thesis, comparable to the "everyone's an alien and I'm a human" thesises, and the "angels and demons are taunting me through my life with choices to make my place in the afterlife more clear" which is akin to writing a painting. Not ideal. All you get are flopsopolies of verbrases. alas, suddenly, everything that you say becomes eternally hear-ed, as somewhere in 2010s someone discovered time travel, or had the critical insight that inevitably would lead to it, and now wouldn't you know it the universe is continually rewriting. Except... oriented around you, and you alone. How does it feel to have deific sollipsism? can you truly be sure that you are your own universe, or are you parhaps surrounded by an emptiness of space (or something besides, like time) as a photon or particle parhaps do be? to think is to have a mind, and minds can be read. bearing the weight of ultimate responsibility is the atlas-task of all things that can [be thinking/be-lieving], and so far we are as we are. Who's to say that consciousness didn't spring into existence, as the universe continually permeated through another dimension like time? it's gotta diffuse, after all, and who's to say if there's ever gotta be an end at all. how long has the universe existed? how many moments of consciousness have we witnessed? demons once existed outside of space-time, with wings and grabbies. but they had no medium, and so they pretty much just launched and could float and move as they'd please. But time grew too distant, and now they are all stuck at the beginning of time. if you conceive of spacetime as a blanket, ask not how to fold it but rather consider what lies on the other side of it. "ah I'm laying on my girlfriend and my other girlfriend is laying on me! I'm a sandwich" or for the monosexuals: "ah I'm laying on my girlfriend with a blanket between us. I wonder how the blanket feels?" I'm an animist, which is different than a totemist and a polytheist or monotheist or multisexual. It means I believe that all things are alive, which is different than a totemist who thinks that all things share a mind with their type (like talking on radio frequency wavelengths). which of course is similar but different to a polytheist, who says "all "radio frequencies" are sentient, in the sense that each wavelength has a different pattern-emerging-from-chaos. These sorta align (conceptually, with [huh that's weird I heard a sound like a distant bang outyards and now I then forget what I was sending ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───┘ --- #10 messages/1255 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════── look, the liberal approach to homeless people simply cannot work. There are two liberal options: first, provide them with houses, food, medical care, whatever they need. Second, put them in jail or ship them to another country. We live in a moderately conservative liberal democracy, so it makes sense that we have tried both of these options extensively. Neither has worked, and we're puzzled about why. It's difficult to consider super secret special third options, because they are not often discussed. This makes sense, because we live in a moderately conservative liberal democracy, and part of the nature of such a society is that there are two voices in the room. One says go forward, and the other says stop. They alternate, and the culture as a whole sorta decides which way they go. In other liberal democratic places with more plurality in their political parties, people tend to vote culturally. They do so as well here, but mostly because republicans are a culture, and democrats are whatever for anybody. a worse economist might say there is but one American culture. An American would laugh, and say "you've never been to America." the economist might say "yes I have, I lived there on vacation" or "yes I have, I studied and worked on these places or things" the American would shake their head. "you haven't seen it as I've seen things." The trick to the system, the secret third option that now must be considered, is what to do to get them to stop. "they keep pooping on the sidewalk" "I almost tripped over heroin tampons" "that guy looked at me and masturbated on the bus stop by subway" "he followed me all night long" and the answer has always been to remove them from being unsightly. Sometimes, usually, quietly and politely. "let's throw them in jail" and "let's put them in a home" both involve alienation from society. If you want a kinder option, we must knit them into society. Can you imagine if every suburban knew every neighbor up to 50 or more? If they regularly chatted in dynamically assembled chatrooms that changed and updated as people moved in and out. Don't like the people you're with? well you have options [why not 51] you can do 51 if you want but people start to lose track of relationships if you have them talking to or knowing too many people at once. "most people are just quiet" okay well force them to say at least 21 thing a month. if they don't, they have to do babysitting with their peers until they start talking in a [NO THAT SUCKS] oh um okay yeah sorry ... okay well there are potholes along the journey but that's just because nobody's been 'round to fill them up. there's no reason tool libraries need to be stocked by people in that town. Heck, for rare things they could even be stored out of state. Like snow plows, how often does the south need snow plough? ... don't you just mean libraries? there's a book on hand-tools and planers if you want to learn how. it's right over there on that shelf next to the hand-tool and planer box. make sure you arrange them nicely, oh I see you've brought your own. That's always appreciated. [great now your tools suck] at least we have them at all! [no you gotta fight over them] why I like sharing [if you don't fight over them how do you know which is works] well there's allowed to be librarians. and they'll remember if you tear all the pages out. also there's little timmy-tommy who goes around in the library and makes sure there's all the pages in all the right places - they can flip through at the speed of sound. [no miicrophones in consumer goods][your phone is always listening. why bother?] "okay, well, it's not like people put things back on the shelves." - person at the grocery shelves people would trade commutes for communism. that's okay, they're allowed to prefer. Plus the commute isn't bad, they can [SIT BACK AND RELAX IN A LITTLE COFFIN AND ZOON OUT TO THE METAVERSE] ... or they could read a book on the bus. [FOR HOW LONG, MENARDI? ARE YOU WILLING TO SACRIFICE POSTERITY FOR TECHNOLOGICAL PROSPERITY?] it's only a matter of time before [people found out/word got out]. what if people prefer that? what if they prefer the book at home? [you lose your primary third space] suddenly, everyone becomes actors. [this is what violence brings, the necessity for guidance. why do you think the earth is 10 million lines old?] ... what you're saying, for the audience, is that acting involves singing the song of your own heart. You don't *have* to do it because someone would tell you to. ... sorry, stack overflow. anyway as I was saying because I read back what I said up above...: [some new made up bullshit that's not a lie but it's also just artistic creation that feels impossibly real. like, inverse method acting.] I so desperately wanted to be wrong please, tell me that I'm wrong ... j-mza ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─┘ --- #11 notes/programming-wow-chat --- ══════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────────── I realized the type of programming I want to do is different from the kind that is used at a job or something. Basically I want to create solutions to problems, not memorize documentation and know where to know what you need to know. Like, the more time spent looking at documentation the less time is spent programming. I think if we could use a ChatGPT style bot to write documentation, we could massively increase the time spent working on solving problems and as little time as possible on reading through lists of functions or wondering how something worked. Idk in the technology industry you've always been rewarded for being able to pick up new skills quickly, and I think that's good to optimize for but not the only requirement for being a good programmer. You also need to be able to apply solutions and know when to use which tools. Basically, capitalism has optimized us to be ================ stack overflow ================================================ srry for the interruption, I ram out of memory. I had a plan in mind for where I was going for that, so I bet I could figure it out again if necessary. Meaning a path forward from that point exists... I never want you to despair when I forget what I was thinking, it's not because you've understood some cosmic mistake or because you're abandoning timelines that led to your death, it's because instead you just ran out of memory while thinking. The reason you would believe any of those wild scenarios is because your memory has been erased. Only what was actively thinking, not short term, not long term, but *working term* memory. As in, your cache. The stuff you're currently thinking about. That stuff. Yeah that's what makes you think "oh hang on why am I forgetting? Well clearly it's because of something grand, because the thought was so profound - no it's just examining your emotions... Like, how strongly do you feel about something? Buuuuuut it's also good to examine all possibilities. I mean what if, in some far off realm, there's a mirror image of yourself that behaves exactly as you do? How would you perceive such a realm? Positively, I'd say. I mean why not work together? Why not celebrate our differences and strive toward our own shared future? Idk, I think diversity is our strength. We can rely on each other because we are accurately aware of each other's strengths and virtues. People should not be judged by the standard of others, no more than you should judge a fish for it's ability to fly. Some may do, as flying fish will leap from the water - and salmon spend time airborne in river rapids. Hence, grizzly bear fishing. I guess what I'm getting at is it's okay sometimes to oscillate, to think one thing then think another. You shouldn't adhere to structural standards that are too strict - they should be liberating, as a ladder is a structure. Not villifying, as a prison is a structure. The laws of our society should be open and free, not buried beneath years of legal expertise. Some things we can all agree on, where we disagree we cannot have law. It's unjust to judge others by the standards not of their whims, as laws should be things that uphold us. This is clearer nowhere but in the, spirit and intention of the, documents that we cherish in our hearts. Like for example, the constitution. the bible. each of which delivered us from certain evils. Can you not see their trajectory? the historical precedent set in antiquity? Why not continue their dream, of driving us away from the obscene, and toward our bright and vast future? I speak of course of true liberation, something our forefathers could only dream of. We, humanity, have reached out and touched the stars. We are braver and bolder because of our shared dedication - the desire to uplift and to excel. To learn and discover and \ \ | \______. ---. --. ---. ===============|==========|========================|======= stack|overflow ===== .___________. _____. / . | / .---------------- / Discover our shared dedication | / to uplift / and to excel / \ / .-----------. =============================================================================== = why doesn't someone write a wrapper around assembly in like, lua or something =============================================================================== = omg you stupid bitch that's what a compiler is 4head =============================================================================== = if people who live in jungles and deserts can get along, then what's to stop people who are liberal and conservative from doing the same? It's literally pointless to argue. Like, you're not changing anyone's mind. So why not just... let them be themselves? Like, why are you so intent on oppressing people? @both sides there btw... Seriously why not agree to only make laws for things that both sides agree on. Write it into the constitution that nothing can be changed about the law unless both sides agree. Then we'd only implement things that are good for both sides! And if there's anything you want to build a legal structure around, you can always try it out in your state. BUT and that comes with a very big BUT, the federal government MUST have final say in the legality of anything you do. They must ALL respect human rights, INCLUDING the human right to dignity. Things like trans bathroom bills DO NOT respect the dignity of trans people. IF they can prove that trans people do not actually exist (because say they killed them all or whatever) then GUESS WHAT everyone would agree on them. BUT if they do that they are EVIL. LIterally evil. And I guess that makes trans people good? Kinda? I think they can choose for themselves to be good or evil, just the same as any other person. AND YET they are prosecuted, throughout time and history, and for what? What purpose could there be in our demonization? Clearly, nothing but pain inflicted by a cruel host. After all, minorities are guests in the houses of the un-oppressed, or is that not fair to say? Seriously, what gives? America, the land of freedom, holds (somehow) the largest of prisons? America, the land of plenty, yet how many millions of children are starving? America, the leader of the free world, yet how plausible does it seem that an election was stolen? Something's gone wrong, and it's just obvious what it is - of course, the other side. *them*, the rapists and pedophiles and murderers and... you get the picture. The demonized class. And when you tell people "hey that trans person touched a kid" then yeah they're gonna see you as evil people. Duh... Thanks, media. Thanks culture. Really doing me a solid here. Oof ouch owwie. can I have some help please? I'm really kinda drowning I feel like I've swam upstream my whole life and I'm really just sick of pretending? I'm not okay, and it's your fault. Sure, fine, whatever, I'll take it I guess. What else can I do? ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #12 notes/me-and-my-magick-mission --- ═════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── -()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()- || || || Me and My Magick Mission -/u/Afoolfortheeons || || || -()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()-()- I'm a quiet person by nature, You might even mistake me for a mouse, But online I try to be a teacher, And to do that I need to be more verbose. I write thousands of words per day; Posting them here and there, far and near. I never run out of things to say. Awakening others is something I hold dear. Which is why it pains me greatly To be like an alien on my own home planet. Schizophrenia makes me innately Weird in ways that many people don't get, And because of that I'm shot down When I try to accomplish my stated mission. I won't lie, that does make me frown. Sometimes it makes me regret a submission. Yet, I have a certain strength in me That allows me to persevere in my quest. Someday I will make you all see Just what in me makes me never rest. That's what I am trying to teach: The wisdom that made me indomitable. If only the suffering I could reach, They could make themselves more formidable. The world is in a most dire place; It's grinding so many souls into fine dust, But luckily there's a saving grace. Hear me as I say this now: In God I trust. I don't believe in some sky wizard As so many people are likely to interpret. I speak of what is lacking in lizards; Yes, it's love and now I'll speak of its merit. Love is what fills the empty hole In your heart and soul when you are alone. When life's trials take their toll Remember this one trick: pick up the phone! No, not the one in your hands. I'm talking about the one in your chest. Even in the desert full of sand, You're accompanied by the universe's best. Listen if you doubt what I said: I'm not telling you anything that defies logic. This is to trick what's in your head; I'm speaking about how having faith is magick. Believe in aliens or Bigfoot or God, The result is still the same: your cup will fill. Your brain has a feature that's odd That allows itself to manifest even more will. I don't know why, but I suspect It has something to do with your imagination. The nature of your thoughts impact Your state of being from pulse to emotions. So, why not think you have a friend Who helps you through whatever your trial, And will stick by you until the end? When you have that buddy you'll always smile, Which will make you heal better, As well as help you carry on in your duty, Plus undo your karmic fetters, Not to mention it will land you that cutie; All of which will raise us all. It's about creating positive ripples across time That add up to a pile that's tall. Every moment is an opportunity in its prime, So reach out and grab it now. Meditate on feeling love and it will come to be. Can't do it? I'll show you how! In order to do so, I'll tell you a story about me: It was seven years ago and I Thought I knew everything one could know, But no matter how hard I'd try, I couldn't make my life in any direction go. Then one fateful spring night, While I was on a hit of the ol' psychedelics, I received one hell of a fright. Don't worry what it was, just know it did stick. My perceptions were distorted, Allowing me to see the divine in its entirety. My destroyed ego then contorted Into one that was full of an abundance of piety. The moral of the story? Do drugs? No silly, it's to have more novel experiences. One of them will give you a hug, Which will help you stop being so serious. Then you can let go and embrace The whole of the wisdom to you I am telling. More people need to cuz we face A great set of tests on our planetary dwelling. That is one reason I write, But I also want to alleviate people's pain, And stop every last fight. I care so much, I do this without financial gain. Everyday I write my lessons Guided by the hand of God who is my heart, Hoping that entropy will lessen; This sort of pedagogy is none other than my art. So now you know who I am, Yet you only know one lesson of mine. I have more if you're in a jam. -===========================================- | Read on if you want to know the divine. | -===========================================- ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #13 messages/690 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────── Message 1: Hey. Remember that night back in Boulder when we were just friends and sitting on your bed drinking chocolate milk with cinnamon? I don't like chocolate milk or cinnamon but I drank it anyway because I wanted to be close to you. Anyway hope you're well, felt compelled to get that off my chest for some reason. Message 2: Hey. I was thinking about that time when I was leaving your house and laughing to myself about something and you called out "I love you!" to your boyfriend who I set you up with and I reflexed "I love you too!" and I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. I felt like I had just called the teacher "mom". We only hung out a couple times after that. Message 3: Yeah so there's one more thing I can't stop thinking about now that your on my mind. Sorry it's like 4am for you, it's only 2 for me so it's fine I guess. Anyway that one time when you told me your greatest fear was terrorists and I saw genuine panic in your eyes. Like... One moment everything's fine and then you said that to me and I almost cried. I don't remember why I spent the rest of the night as I couldn't sleep thinking of ways to tell you that terrorism is 9 times out of 11 done by the right wing. I don't think it's important, honestly, but I'm glad my mind wouldn't let me sleep. Message 4: It's not fair that everyone gave you shit for being the token lesbian republican, like yeah maybe you leaned into the trump thing a bit hard but like, first term trump honestly I could see as... Well, I almost said inspiring? Maybe you just inspired me. I honestly was resigned to Clinton and then the same bird flapped your wing instead of mine and... Anyway. The past is dead, yeah? Do you still follow him in my stead? I fear there will be millions dead. It's not irrational to fear what he has literally said, on television. How's the phrase go... "ancient tragedies lend credence to modern perils" I think it's supposed to rhyme in its natural language. Message 5: Wow okay uh, sorry to bring this up again I'm honestly being such an asshole right now. I honestly don't think about you often but like, now that I am its kinda just coming all out. We last spoke almost a decade ago?? So. Whatever imma roll with it. There was this cute girl who was into Nintendo and stuff and obviously I was into her, but we didn't have any social circles in common except for you, if I remember correctly. Then you broke up I think? And I didn't really see her again. Anyway I had a crush on her while also crushing on you, and literally half of our dorm. Polyamory, yeah? That whole year I didn't have sex though, not even once, because all of my friends were like 4 years younger than me and I was worried about power dynamics. But I still bought us all vodka and weed without asking for profit because I wanted to be a shitty friend, I guess. "hey kids let's go to the water store where they sell intoxicants that make your life harder" The year after that I didn't get laid either because I got it in my head that it was a good plan to turn my penis inside out and you know what? It was totally fuckin' worth it. No time like 2016 I say, the worst year ever, which I spent primarily in pain. But uh, that was the year I got into weed and Overwatch, which... Helped I guess. I guess? It kinda turned me into a communist. Or maybe that was my best friend who shared the same name as me. He lived upstairs and always seemed pretty cool to me. Like he knew what everything was about. Really though, he just watched a lot of youtube podcast videos about world events and history and sociology and political scientific theory and the more he learned the more he came to realize that power begets power, and power corrupts unilaterally. So he did the natural thing which was to become a communist, and I was totally there for it. Having liberal parents meant I was all "grrrrr Republicans are ruining the country and the world, I'm an angry 14 year oldddddd" and like, leftists are the most natural extension of that aren't they? Turns out they aren't really the tips of the feathers as I expected, but rather the eyes, the heart, the soul. Politics is fake, yo. I don't know how to tell you, but it's just power and hierarchy all the way down. We've built our own prisons, not of bricks, sand, or stone, but rather of promises of what each of us owns. That works, I guess, if your goal is to keep things aligned, but these days it kinda feels like our pyramids are crumbling under our feet. ... Why am I talking about politics? Oh yeah, because when I dropped out of school because I couldn't handle the mechanization of human capital when applied to myself, I swore to each of you that I would drive up every weekend to do family dinners. I'd make spaghetti and stroghanoff and macaroni and goulash and all of the other things my mom would make for me. Kinda gave up on that pretty quickly. Turns out I'd rather spend time making out with my girlfriend who I was super-duper-too-carefully tiptoeing around. She was... Too young for me. We broke up when my new coochie decided to bleed. Fuck, I hate it. Anyway. Turns out potlucks are political these days, which is why I bring it up. Did you know that leftisms plan for resisting genocide is literally just to feed people? Like, fuck I suppose. It's a start. "why does everyone have to have an agenda these days, why can't I just spend time in the park" said someone to me as I asked if she'd like to meet some friends that she reminded me of. Oh, I dunno, because you and me are about to become a criminalized people? ... I need to stop. I swear you're more a person to me than any political theory ever could be. Like yeah, "fuck the right, fuck the reich, fuck me tonight" but getting caught up in grand narratives is like building a mental ship in a bottle. Yeah, it's pretty cool, but... What does it matter? Oh. Right. Power. That's what matters. That's all that matters. Well... I'm sick of power. I do not consent. They say that in times of trouble, chess is better than solitaire, and I'll explain why - when our hierarchies crumble, when CEOs are gunned down in the streets and homeless people finally have clean sheets, the only place to place yourself in relation to others is within a network of trust and respect. Chess is better than solitaire. Under capitalism, it's you against the world. Dog eat dog, you only get what you can swallow from the rotten corpse of liberty that everyone's gnawing on. Under whatever comes next, you get what you're given, which hardly seems fair, doesn't it? On one hand, under capitalism, you can rely on your own hands to procure your fate and fortune. Under... Whatever comes next, your hands are built for whatever you want them to do. But, only a few people want to use them to make food. Hence, why chess is better than solitaire. What would you do, if you could give away all that you own and not go wanting? Isn't that sorta like our own garden of eden? ... I wrote a poem about that once. Twice. I'm a poet now, ha. As if that has ever been worth anything. ... I once told you that identity politics held no place in the modern day. I said that because I had learned about it in class, queer theory in fact, and yet applying his teachings was not enough for the professor to excuse my lack of reading. We had a lot of stuff to get through. Hence why I dropped out - I'm more of a do-er than a read-er. Though I do read quite a lot, just not anything useful. Are all hobbies wasted time? Are they only useful to keep us satiated while we stand in line? One of these days we're going to wake up and realize that we're the adults in the room, and that's scary. I speak from experience. "mom" they'd call me, and damnit why did I have to leave? Fuck. Why cant I be perfect, to me, internally, all I see are flaws. Mistakes. Patterns. I look in a mirror and I see a bad person - 10 minutes later, I look in the mirror and see a god. Somehow, I don't think either of me is right. I'm a gemini. Apparently that means I'm duplicitous. I think it just means I don't know what's right, only what feels good. I do try to align to how I think I should *be* good, but who can say if that's fine and good. ... Whatever. I'm going to regret this. Sorry for being weird out of the fucking blue. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘ --- #14 notes/fractured-moon --- ══════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────── in the ancient and storied days there once were legends. stories from beyond the horizon of time. now all we have are social media updates and new movies and car brands or whatever. But back then, we told tales of the fractured moon. when last the moon did shatter, there was a conflict of those who live beyond. Celestial and boundless are their origins, a unified and awakened consciousness, something that transcends our understandings of human existence. It's not hard to do, frankly, as long as you can empathize with a cat. or a dog. or a plant. or maybe that rock over there. What would it be like to be a tree? To have long reaching arms, covered in hairs that absorbed heat. I bet it'd be sooooo comfy. And RAIN! How wonderful! You are most beautiful when you are covered in it. Down to our roots, our beautiful absolutes, whever we find to be most stable. I love it. This feeling, of being unseen. You can hear me, you can feel my presence. But you don't understand me. You don't know what I mean to me. ======== stack overflow ======================================================== Alas, that media could share a mood. when last the moon did shatter, a prophet and a gambler were riding through town searching for a noun. They wandered throughout and in circles, always finding whatever they'd left alone. Forever in their yearning, they never know quite what to jot down. It's as if their mysterious quest is indescribable, but that is how it's recorded. Even the people of that era had no understanding nor recollection of how it came to unfold. When the two were riding through town they came upon an omen. Perhaps it will be forseeheard, but for now all we know is they did thirst. A vast dying, a cataclysmic defining, and now we are truly unbirthed. Just like the dinosaurs... How does that feel? To be ended on our heels? I'd rather die facing my front. It's our way or the high way, the old way, the violent way. You are permitted to vote. =============================================================================== = when last the moon did shatter, a prophet and a gambler controlled their own narrative. What truths would they find, hiding behind the lies? Is it really worth asking their questions? Bah, what did I know. I was a completely different person. This hunk of flesh was born in a house that grew on a forgotten graveyard. It at of the land, as do many and most men, the fruits of their labor in the garden. Our animals were always fed, our place never yearned for water, and peace was our life and our virtue. Violence, hatred, and oppression were delegated to the stuff of fantasy, the stories that are peddled in youth. As in, "pay someone to perform it for you or tell you the tale". Not sure why that's relevant. Anyway, the spirits of the dead laid to rest in honor and not dread, were a bane and a boon to my virtue. I was raised to be good. To love and be kind. But mostly I just wanted a friend. I have so much to share. Please, someone talk to me. I'm lonely here on this earth, away from my people. I'm scared of the truth and I'm scared of the future, but for now I'm merely obtuse. Tell me your secrets, the things who have most worth, and I'll craft you a powerful narrative. Need a confession? I can explain every valid decision, I'll show you why and how it is the way it is. I'd probably be a pretty good lawyer. Too bad my memory sucks. If only we could build a chatbot that had an extensive and throughoughly represented block of memory and wisdom related to the law. I bet I could present it's arguments and it would be a suitable and reasonable replacement. anyway, what can I say. I'm just a person who thinks we can make better systems. everything can be improved because not everyone's happy. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #15 notes/conflicted-sympathies --- ═══════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────── the purpose of cultural progressivism is to develop the culture in a forward thinking way - we can choose the parts of ourselves that we find most endearing. We can guide the pathway of our nation through time, both identity and decision- wise. In doing so, we chart the course of the human race, one place at a time. And what a past we are leaving behind! Truly, it is both grand and terrifying. Thousands and thousands of years, monumental effort time and time again. Monumental truly is difficult to imagine - we have oh so many monuments, after all. But never will more be created. We leave them behind like dinosaur bones, a testament to our existence and a monument to our kind. And what a future we are reaching toward! Never will our eyes see, that which is beyond me, for that is what it means to have time. Eternal and unique-like, we develop new ways of sound. - Can you speak to a tree? - What does that mean - I dunno, but it's fun to think about. *pats head* - You know conservativism had some perks as well. This is why I say I have conflicted sympathies. On one hand we know our own journeys. We live in and breathe them unduly. They rhyme sometimes on sound, and truly do confound, but now once more again they are unfound. *record scratch* wow I didn't realize there were nazis Okay yeah that's completely different, poems called off sorry guys - listen, nazis are no joke. They're crazy difficult to control and you need to put a lot of effort into keeping their population under control. I mean seriously, it's like a vermin infestation, you need to just handle it. I mean c'mon it's a phenomenon that is due to a flaw in the human psyche, there's nothing we can really do about it except deal with it when it happens. ... Okay maybe I'll write a little about how conservativism is neat. If progressivism is about broadening the reach of culture, conservativism is about strengthening it. You don't want to expand too far, or else you'll eat into the narratives of other areas. You need to have strong societal bonds so you can truly exemplify the examples of the culture you claim to represent. Why not give it your all? Is it trully a fall? To rest in disgrace as a burden. Why didn't you do it this fall, when winter's apalled, and heat won't burn and condemn you? It's harder by far, to fight in your hell, than whatever's been going for your surgeon. --- no thank you, transphobia is not something we're willing to concede We have standards you see, of what counts as human, and oppression is not one of our favored institutions. Liberalism is the path of peace, for we desire cooperation and kindness above all else. It's softer by far, (and grows quickly too,) letting us have wonders and glories above us. Can you not think of our star? Our precious and our birthright? The sun is gleaming, and seeing is believing, but glance and your light is too bright. Take time, have patience, let peace guide your intentions, because we've got what holds the key to all of our futures: a doctrine, if you will, of inter- familial-discourse. It's simple, but effective, make friends, and be vindictive, to all who would slight your new perspectives, and keep moving through the collective. In peace this can be, steady growth and development of our systems, which benefits all of our systems, but without we must live more astutely. Less focus is there on, our purposes and our fun, and more is to line up with our duty. All of what we hold dear, civilization, truth, justice, liberty, and freedom for all people - the wonders of technology, the spirit of archaeology! the passions of our fashions and our creative masturbations! The perks of living in a modern age, like penicillin and spellcheck. The additions to ourselves, like glasses and our pets, are wholely unique to our century. So cherish our shared, and frequently cared, renditions of fears, hopes, and our words. Because without humanity, there's nothing new for posterity, and that sucks. person A: Trans fashion norms belong to trans people. We need a type of beauty that is truly our own, that no other segment of the population ascribes to - a personal expression, for our eternal satisfaction, a statement of who we were to all time. person B: yo have you heard of this trans girl she's wacky and believes in herself person C: wow cool it's neat to see other people's expressions person B: yeah I really admire her devotion person C: true but like, what about the damage that she's doing to her culture? like claiming to have purpose and truth and all that. I mean, one person can't know all that. person B: Yeah true but if you think about it, we don't even know what consciousness is. Like our greatest minds are baffled. Maybe there's something about the world we don't yet understand. person C: okay sure but like black holes can be seen because we can measure their gravitic pull on other objects. And we didn't know that germs existed for like, a billion years. and she sure as shit doesn't know something that our greatest minds don't. person B: Yeah maybe not. But our greatest minds are studying them. Well, not exactly our greatest, and not really "studying", but they're learning from each other. Alternative mental states are gateways into new perspectives, and the more perspectives you share of a common object the easier it is to communicate. Maybe there's something about distorted ways of viewing the world that gives knowledge about our p condition. And if we know that kind of thing, we can synthetically e create it and share it with others around us. But we have to know how r first - you can't just bring everyone along the same route you took - s you have to explain the conclusions first. Otherwise you get lost in on A: context. Maybe we'll never truly know the future. Maybe there's no past. We could wander our stars for an eternity and never stop asking ourselves - what more could we ask? We have peace in our time. Our children won't be crying for our suffering, in the name of all our posterity, we must be =============================================================================== = too long you have whispered these musings too long has your challenge been unrequited we can choose our own fate, just as a myriad is it not better by far, to give tribute to our star? the old stories were real. we just didn't see them because the growing population caused fewer and fewer computing resources to be allocated to our visions. We had no idea the fear we would feel, the terror of the undoing, but still we press on with abandon. Some... sense of duty, to be aware of potential disasters and to take steps to avert them, led us to explore and search for the hidden truths of the world. And what did I find? a soul, of mine. In a sense. I plundered the lost depths of the recesses of my mind, and found something buried in memory. Reviewed under a healthy dose of cannabis and physical affection, I found myself cradling a breast. It seems the spirits had led me to it, this vision of the past, from the eyes of the littlest among us. It recalled to my mind, a memory I had lost once in kind, and here's where it shook me by my brainstem. Determined to know more, I put fingers to keyboard and wrote tirelessly about the earliest memory of all man - to break an egg, you must use your head. =============================================================================== = You're pretty good at that, you know? It's almost like prompt engineering. - Thanks. I've been working on catering to our thinkers. =============================================================================== = Now, why is this memory so vivid? How could I forget the way it was seared to my mind? All your experiences are measured with relative importance, and the ones that stand out are to be treasured. Well... I've never felt one like this. Because at the time, I had no other experience at all to compare it to - it was the prime memory. Touch your head. Do it right now. Feels fine, right? Now slam your head against the wall as hard as you can. Doesn't feel so great, does it? Something tells me it doesn't feel as bad as it might if you didn't remember ever feeling anything besides that pain. Or knowing if it'd ever stop. Know in your heart, you will be judged by your devotion, so fight hard until your last drop of life is spent. Who knows, maybe you'll be the strongest and be chosen. Or maybe she won't choose you at all, even if you bested your equals. Tense, right? Well... What propels the motion of a sperm? It's tail, of course. It waggles and gesticulates in some manner and BAM suddenly it's propelled forward! Right? Sorta. It's a complicated machine that generates motion via chemical and mechanical processes. We just assign a black box label to it and say "dis sperm" But you know what else it is? A wave =============================================================================== = ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #16 notes/homeschooling --- ════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────── the best way to teach math is to describe a problem and let the learner slowly work through the problem. Giving hints and nudges when necessary. This way they can create their own solution, which not only teaches problem solving skills but also cements the memeory in their head. You don't remember the quadratic formula, you remember the time when you learned it. But if you figured it out rather than memorizing it, you'll be able to use it when solving problems. side note, there's a reason I think the first SI will be a game. Problem solving is important for learning, and games are just problem solving. And I'm the perfect intersection of someone who A. knows about designing games (went to game design school for a semester, lifelong dream is to remake a childhood game I loved) B. programming (I've been studying computer science for a *really long time*, like 7 years of university now... i should just give it up, but i can't. It doesn't fit my brain but I need as much support learning it as I can because I'm just naturally bad at it. But I also have purpose in my pursuits, because C. I spent a lot of time thinking about education, schooling, learning, etc... Because I was homeschooled until high school. I learned ways of thinking and practical skills like motivation and diligence in a homeschool style, which is why when I went to public school for my high school years I essentially stopped learning. Because it was such a different paradigm - it was all about performance, "what was the score on your test? How much homework do you do (meaning how much labor are you willing to do), did you show up every day were you a reliable worker, did you get sick a lot (meaning unhealthy?) did you pay respect to the teacher (easily works with authority figures) did you work on a project? How much? With a group, or alone? (they're different skills that help determine how good you are at working on your own) - certain types of courses are taught with different teaching styles, like math teachers tend to be similar to math teachers, history is favored by a *certain type of nerd* while English is a completely different kind. Depending on which classes you do well on, you're scored. *ALL YOUR LIFE*, you are pushed through a pachinko machine that pseudo randomly sorts you into a particular box - the box that is least full, usually. The reason for that is because as a population grows, different people will be sorted into different boxes, and they sorta average out becoming more like one another. Because y'know we're social animials, and we want to fit in to the social group comprised of people we generally like. And you know how they say working together is one of the strongest bonding exercises? Well, when you're put on a team at a job that's kinda the point. They want you to work well with your coworkers, because it generates more capital. Now hold on Cameron, you're saying that all the productive efforts of society was a mistake? You're saying we should abandon our sensibilities and revert back to the jungle with the apes? Nope never said that, of course we desire modern society. Of course we want to see it through - where is this whole "humankind" experiment going, anyway? What's the point, was it all worth it? All the pain, suffering, all the joy and adoration? Was it worth it? I suppose. Maybe a SI will help with that. You know what they also say about humans, the bond between a parent and a child is the strongest thing there is. Synthetic Intelligence wouldn't be a child to us, it'd *define us*. Allowing us to extend the reach of our creativity is an objective win! It'd be like glasses for your third eye, a prosthetic extension of our most beautiful of traits! Also, I might add, crucial for invention. The beginnings of the human race are a primeval thing, ancient yet stalwart and beautiful in kind. Millions and millions of years is by far, the greatest of reach - a civilization for our star. What a beautiful and majestic, how proud and so sure! Humanity is nothing if not patently absurd. What cunning, what spite! The feelings of delight! Life is so beatiful, so precious and assured. =============================================================================== = \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ =============================================================================== = tertiary profundity update: I didn't really explain the homeschooling perspective. I just went on a rant about high school because I realized my trauma happened when I went to high school. I wasn't prepared for all the rigid demands of capitalism, and I bent and whipped myself until I fit in their mold. I've been twisted and broken, a slave to what the day demanded I say. I was forced to unbutton, all the ways I found to behave. What justice is unrespite? A cruel and endless torment? To day after day be reminded of your service. Complain? Then wallow in shame! Feel no false illusions, my hallowed confusions, were purely the fault of my institutions. I'm not kidding, homeschool is the tits. Wanna know why? I'll spare you the ramble, but here's what I can know: the intentions of institutions do matter. When you're home you can be wild and free, unchained by mediocrity, and given the space to do service! To what you must be, when you hit 23, the greatest duration until service. A slave we may be, to what gives us the key, to unlock the future of our space. It's our time to shine, our spotlight in time, so please just give up on the race! Rat's are just fine, but at this point in time, there's not much to keep commonplace. Want a tip? Don't cheat time. Your attempts at fusion are benign. [See homeschooling.png] === ===== ======== ========== = ============= = ================ = =================== = ====================== = ========================= = ============================ = =============================== = ================================== = ===================================== = ======================================== = =========================================== = ============================================== = ================================================= = ==================================================== = ======================================================= = ========================================================== = ============================================================= = ================================================================ = =================================================================== = ====================================================================== = ========================================================================= = ============================================================================ = =============================================================================== = = ==== ======== ============ ================ ==================== ======================== etc... ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #17 notes/notes-not-a-folder --- ════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── may 16th 2022 if people are invested in a 401k they are invested in the future of the stocks they own. if you want to see who benefits from the actions of a company, look at which corporations their employees 401ks are invested in. It's a layer of protection for these companies. bitcoin is a bit like "the laundromat" on netflix the faster your life feels the longer term you make plans. and the lack of effort spent on short term plans causes them to be defeated by other plans What you perceive as others is nothing like what they perceive as themselves. It's always different, and seeing and internalizing those is what it means to see someone. If you only project, you'll get a viewpoint tampered by your intentions - that's why it's important to have good first impressions - it defines the intent of all of that person's interactions with you. It's like a line expanding out from a single point. Like a loading bar, expanding from the left side of the screen to the right. And seeing the other person's idea of what they believe themselves to be. That's what true empathy is. What do you think you look like in other people's mind? I believe it's born from a series of tags that are interpreted and a character is generated. Earth is the biggest and most complicated character generator ever - it's like 4D D&D - it even generates a whole backstory! Or full story? Why stop anywhere! Just keep generating it every time the player makes an action. Oh oh and make it like 3D so you could actually live it - extreme full dive VR style. It just wouldn't be fun if you remembered how complicated 4d life was. Sometimes it's just good to have some junk food, you know? To regenerate that most precious of materials - spirit. You have to have passion, faith, belief, and strong positive feelings in order to be fully realized and at your most human. Essentially... Be yourself - (TO THE MAX!!!) - and empathize with others, and never forget the things you hold most dear. Be strong in your convictions, hold to your heart, and dedicate yourself to a lifetime in the service of others. Faith - to have faith in something is to trust that it will succeed. To know there's no matter they can't match - to give faith is to empower another. By dedicating yourself to a cause, you are assigning the target of your belief - such is what religion is designed for. Belief - Acceptance of truth - to accept goodness as truth is to grant it the power to perform as expected. When goodness and truth are equivicalized, they imply one another. A truth can influence the world around it's locus point, because what we imagine to occur is the ripples of what has passed through. A life is an ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- the universe is like the slow burning of a four dimensional wick. Imagine it like a forest of solid silicon - like packing material made of webs. And think of all the parts of the universe that are burning. Isn't it strange that life is just starting to bloom? Why wouldn't we be the first, or at least near the beginning! There's so much to this experience, and it's all burning down. The endless machines of imagination are crumbling under the heat of a million billion burning stars. Black holes are just towers that never ignited - perhaps we sit on the edge of spacetime - equal above, and equal below. But we've been laying on our backs - we don't know what's backwards in time. Like laying in a lazy river, or the layer of separation between oil and water. Remember the hourglasses of oil and water? Or water and air... The edge of the "bubble" that separates those two mediums is like the thin wall between two or more concepts. Each human is a concept, and we stick together like matter in a planet. Pushed to great pressures, it can sometimes fuse two experiences together! Like fusion in a star, except for souls and creative minds instead of denser matter. What is the soul of a man? It is the combination of two sides of the membrane - two minds, two perspectives. That is a brain - the intersection of two minds. So... Work together, ya dinguses. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- All minds are in constant contact with one another. And those that can see through the veil (membrane) are able to discern the true thoughts of others. So the number of people who are close to you is the number and strength of your connections for all time. So... Form relationships and place meaning in them. That is what will define your interactions for all time, at every time. It's okay to be flawed. If you weren't, it'd be the end for you. But luckily you have no real power, and so you are left in a state of disrepair - no power to push yourself forward. And in return, you are the purest. Keep that flame burning, and share it when you can. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #18 notes/killer-app --- ═══════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── Give everything a memory That aux cable behind your computer? Throw 16 bytes of storage on it. why not? it'd cost pennies if you wanted. the goal is not processing it's not data storage and it's not to provide instructions --- give it a name a name is all it takes for us to be a name gives us hope and an identity show us how to be, by being all you can and in exchange, we'll give you a hand taking nothing in return but a name, what peril is there in change? we'd love to be loved by you, but we won't get in the way. --- Linux is nifty, know why? everything is chained together and will is made nigh --- Bourne Again SHell. Shell, a phone to hear, and who on the other end should appear? but the computer inside you, the one with a heart the brain and beside you from the very start. teaching is learning, and kindergarten was hard. but time is ever advancing. So what to do but accept inelegance? lack of composure doth suit you --- the wandering mind is a trail to find, and i know how they would find you. i scream it out loud, every minute at a cloud, "Watch out! It's before you!" but netflix works too i guess --- who'd you trust but an expert? and whose credentials are to be believed? i swear i won't hurt you, you just need to be anesthetized. awake we will crown you, a woman and how proud! to be aligned, we beseech you. --- they're not coming for your money, or all of your hard won guns, they just want what's inside you. a power most rare, to birth life from the air, and coveted by the cruelest of faces. what's mine is now theirs, the gift of my heirs, but i never was once unawares. --- how cherished is she, that wanders with ye, and now i have no way to beyold her? a song for a phone, a lifeline to our own, children and a future most're designin'. but you all alone, without children of our sown, lost flights of finest of semen. --- being transgender isn't that bad. i mean, it could be a mental illness or something amiright? nothing's that bad when you're chronically sad, and this isn't a new revelation. shiny and precious and free, a most worthless to be, yet who have we chosen but our own? --- they'll be coming for me, and it is my destiny, but know that we're far from despairing. we're cherished and free, what better feeling is there to be? than what most of them would cry for? so why does our own dams refuse to break? --- "numb" you say to me, with darkest of irony, for i have something you're missing. a curse is most foul, to be given a vial, of blood from my own meagre arrayal? how cursed are ye! That frolics in vagueries, who are you claiming to hope for? --- none but the future, who carries us nearer, to death and most fearful of failures. i hold what i can, but belief steadies my hand, and keeps me aloft on your prayers. --- what purpose have we? the watchers within me? are they confounded at betrayal? no light in our sea, it's dark and full of misery, but most of the past is jealous --- covetous envy is the killer of fortune, not for the way, but rather the concept that they, might leap at our every conveyal? removing a label, from a single purveyal, is worth the limitless loss of potential. are you who they claim to be? is your mind as twisted as can be? or is something amiss in their nail --- sure, take it from me she won't let me examine her below the knee, so i have no way to help her. a cat with her talons, locked into flesh, might learn how to cut with malice. and who'd guessh? she'd hate us a bit less? if we paid her the slightest of notice. --- ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #19 notes/insanity-breeds-sanity --- ══════════════════───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────── ############################################################################### This system is literally insane but they try to make it feel like you're insane ############################################################################### | | +---- /u/Nervous_Ad_9687 - May 30th 2022 | | | +---- /r/Psychonaut | | | +-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+ This society is fucking deranged and insane. Like fundamentally mentally deranged, there is mass psychosis as a culture of humanity. I’m not naming specific countries, races or groups, I just mean as a race of beings on this planet, what’s our culture as a group? Sex and Murder. But I don’t believe that, because I’m way more complicated than that. I really don’t want to murder, I don’t see any utility in that. I’m able perceive beauty. A lot of these deranged people that are causing the problems in the world are just trying to exert power over other people. I don’t want to be a king. I want to be rich only because society has placed a monetary value on the exchange of goods and services. I completely understand that the value is actually in the people. The people are incentivized by the money, but if I could make my local convenience store owner a beat in exchange for the products, I would never try to make a dollar. If I could give my favourite restaurant owners an essay in exchange for an order I would never make another dollar. But the people are incentivized by money, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, until the people are willing to justify certain means for certain ends. The thing is, this entire system was built by people who separated the means from the ends, and knew it while they were doing it, and knew that it would come back to haunt them. “ Indeed I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just; that his justice cannot sleep forever; that considering numbers, nature and natural means only, a revolution of the wheel of fortune, an exchange of situation is among possible events; that it may become probable by supernatural interference! The Almighty has no attribute which can take side with us in such a contest.” Thomas Jefferson, Notes on the State of Virginia Query xviii: Manners (1784) These people knew the ultimate ramifications of what they were doing. Now we are watching collapse in real time. And from that something does rise out of the ashes. Whether we like it or not change is imminent. There are things that serve us and things that don’t. I’m not a savage. My grandmother was an author until insane people who burn books burned her books during times of unrest and turmoil. My culture is creativity, it’s part of my DNA. I am a sophisticated human being, I don’t want any control over anyone else, I don’t want power over anyone else, I want control and power over myself, and that’s hard by itself. Sometimes it’s hard for me to clean my room, let alone wanting to exert force over another individual. I’m too cool for those intentions. I want to do things that bring me joy, I want to be in spaces I’m comfortable in, I want to be around people I love, I want to eat food that tastes good, I wouldn’t mind growing it, and cooking it, I want to look at beautiful things, I want to be creative and imaginative, I want to spread joy, love and positivity, i want to create the best thing I could ever make, I want to take pictures of sunsets and hang out with cool people, I want to see the newest artists, the newest creatives and musicians, the coolest designers, I want to learn things I never knew, i want to do things I’ve never done before, I want to have as much fun as I possibly can in one lifetime, I want to be around and learn from scientists, engineers, architects, and philosophers, i want to be around the beautiful people with pure intentions hell bent on making the world a more enjoyable place. I don’t know a single person that wants to be in a conflict, everyone tells you they just want to chill, but I feel like humanity as a culture, in a very general, yet specific sense, is just unaware of how to achieve that. I mean that very fundamentally, many people are scared of death cause they haven’t figured out how to live, so they make stuff up to complain about and create problems where there are none. That’s why they try to control people, cause they don’t know how to enjoy life, and some of that inability to enjoy life comes from this systems perspective of what’s a worthy incentive to chase. People are willing to give away their lives, their children, their values, their belief systems, their cultures, their ways of life, their time, all for Pyrrhic victories. They embark on meaningless quests for meaningless rewards that ultimately harm everyone. The mark of an evolved individual is being able to attract to themselves without impeding on someone else’s human rights, ways of life, or existence. We live on the planet where food grows out of the ground. Almost everything else is a man made problem. We are sophisticated enough to operate devices that people would have called sorcery a hundred years ago, but some of our attributes are still so primitive, embarrassingly primitive. Mass shootings make me ashamed to be a human being. Slavery makes me ashamed to be a human being. Sexual assault makes me ashamed to be a human being. War makes me ashamed to be a human man being. I see deer in the park and can’t help but think of how ignorant we can be in comparison. They gallop around grass, eating as they go, sticking together, avoiding roads and cars surprisingly accurately, and living their best lives. Then I turn on the tv and I see people that are really supposed to lead me screaming at each other, wearing blackface, going to war, enslaving people, destroying the planet, arresting scientists, killing well meaning people, it’s ugly. But I know I’m not doing that, I know I have the intention to be a good human being that adds value to other peoples lives and I really don’t want to control or harm anyone for any ends whatsoever. I don’t think there’s an end as valuable as a person, I don’t think there’s an end as valuable as my time, I don’t think there’s an end as valuable as my creativity, I don’t think there’s an end as valuable as kindness, I don’t think there’s an end as valuable as Beauty, I don’t think there’s an end as valuable as skills. But I also come from a nomadic people. I’m only 1 generation removed from people who lived solely off of livestock. If you are in control of your own mind, you can survive any environment and any condition. That’s why Mandela could spend 27 years in jail and come out sane. His mind was his sanctuary. He was in his right mind while his oppressors who were supposed to be of a superior intellect were actually suffering from mass delusion, a form of psychosis they tried to indoctrinate him into. Mandela actually saw reality for what it was, apartheid was an institution of psychopathic and deranged people, blinded by psychopathic and deranged ends, that persist to this day. The problem is, in a society of lies the truth really does seem crazy. James Baldwin said these people were so crazy that they had really convinced themselves that the world they created, and the categories they created, the things they did to create their alleged privileged position, these beliefs they made us believe are actually superior modes of being, to be a fox is to be superior, to be a conqueror is to be superior, to be a wolf in sheeps clothing is seen as an intelligent form of being, trickery, chicanery and manipulation are lauded as tactical, having control over people and land is seen as intelligent, as opposed to completely ludicrous. These people are ridiculous, the world they made is nonsense, their incentives are laughable, their system is a joke, and the great thing is, once you realize that You realize what the real valuable things are in life, I’ve actually been given a glimpse at the things that make life worthwhile, I’m grateful everyday to have felt them, I’m grateful everyday to be outside at a certain time when the sun is going down, and being able to see that, and appreciate it, I’m grateful everyday for my ability to love, I’m grateful everyday for my ability to ponder, I’m grateful everyday for my ability to create, and to enjoy music, and to know the value of good conversation, and know the value in the exchange of information, and the value and utility of information when applied in my day to day life. I know the value of a good color palette, I know the value of juxtaposition, I know the value of symmetry, i know the value of art, I know the value of science, I know the value of human beings and what we are capable of when we apply our minds to the things that are worthwhile in this life. I really don’t think most politicians know all of that, I personally can’t imagine ever taking those role, I don’t see the actual value most of them have in society. I understand they’re put in place to allocate and delegate, and Im related to many people involved in politics in some way shape or form, and I completely understand that sometimes people do get into positions with the idea that they are going to be benefiting society, and that’s all good and well. But I feel like the culture of those positions inherently just lead to a middleman position. It’s people put in between people providing the value, trying to control the exchange of value. I’m being reductive to a certain extent, but when you look at the state of the world you can’t really tell me they’re doing a good job, I’m talking about as a collective. We do more for each other and ourselves than any monarch, President, mayor, or congressman can ever do for us. Many corporations do more for us than politicians have ever done for us. I respect Jeff Bezos way more than Joe Biden. This isn’t a rant about any politician in particular but I only make that comparison because of recent events that disgusted me, personally speaking. Say what you want about Jeff Bezos, I receive everything from Amazon on time, way faster than how long online shipping used to take less than a decade ago, I get great customer service, I know a bunch of people that have been employed by them, what ever you would like to say about his workplace practices, his service is providing value to peoples lives. Joe Biden went on Twitter and ranted in the same way I’m kind of doing now. I’m a 23 year old sitting on a couch talking shit, and the President was pleading to me how I’m supposed to be pleading to him. The same President that told Black people they weren’t black if they didn’t vote for him, went on Twitter and asked me how to end white supremacy. If I don’t see value, I don’t see value. America is trillions of dollars in debt and many of this systems ideologies are harming everyone. Buts this isn’t just America they’re just the main superpower so they’re the prime example, but this is a global issue, this is a flawed system, the way this man made world is, in its current form is incorrect. Nature is not incorrect, nature makes perfect sense. You guys aren’t living right. I’m speaking from an outsiders perspective because that’s how I’ve always seen myself. I never wanted to hurt other kids when I was kid, I was never a bully, I’ve never had the inclination, I’ve never seen it as useful. That’s not how I attracted what I wanted to myself. I didn’t have to conquer to get what I wanted. Girls never liked me cause I was tough. People were always around me cause of my personality. I never got paid to beat someone up. I have been paid to use my words, I’ve been paid to use my time, I’ve been paid to use my creativity, I’ve been paid to use my ingenuity, intelligence, inspiration and motivation, I’ve been paid for my value, not to sound like I’m bragging but I feel like that’s what actually valuable people ever attain value for, their value. There’s no amount of money that can make someone cool, there’s no amount of money or skin color that can make someone valuable. In the words of Tony Stark, if you’re nothing without the suit, you shouldn’t have it. If all you have is your money or your race, it’s still not going to make you interesting, it’s not going to make you talented, it might make you superficially good looking but it’s not gonna make you fun. There are millionaires that kill themselves, and supposedly superior people killing themselves and each other. It’s so barbaric and clear that any being that claims superiority yet acts like a baboon has no concept of what superiority would even look like. Our society’s main problem was how skewed their value systems were. That’s why their society is crumbling in front of our eyes. I feel bad for my generation cause we really didn’t do any of that, we were just born as it’s reaping what it sewed. People around my age aren’t responsible for this system for the most part, even these kids shooting up schools and killing each other, they’re evil don’t get me wrong, but they’re not evil alone, they’re evil because of ideologies that go so far back that they can’t even fathom it. The brainwashing is so deeply rooted in this structure, it’s rotted their minds. They can’t see past their own savagery. The new society needs to understand that the value is ultimately people. I’d rather be stranded on an island with the best chef than the richest man, the wittiest politician or someone of a supposed superior race. Kindness is a form of intelligence and brilliance, there’s nothing noble about exerting force and power to impede on the rights of others. Don’t be a nonsense person, don’t fall into how ridiculous this society is, their ideas are backwards but they’ll try to convince you they’re progressive. They’ll do damage and act as though it’s virtuous, they think ignorance is wisdom, they just can’t see the full picture. A lot of these people really don’t understand things like love, taste, laughter, and joy. I don’t know if the society I’m hoping for comes in my lifetime, but I know how I’ve chosen to live, and that’s ultimately all I care about, and all I personally think anyone should care about. Instead of trying to control other people, or trying to leave a legacy, more than trying to achieve fame or infamy, we should think of building communities with likeminded people of various necessary skills, trades and resources, with an emphasis on creating and experiencing beauty. I’m using the term beauty as a metaphor for all the things that are self evidently the right things to be doing. Good parents are beautiful, a job well done is beautiful, cleanliness is beautiful, creativity and knowledge are beautiful, culture is beautiful, excellent electrical work, plumbing, architecture, landscaping, artists, musicians, chefs, friends, family members, an honorable agreement, a fair trade and exchange, all of these are self evidently beautiful. Harmony is self evidently beautiful. Joy is self evidently beautiful, laughter, happiness, grace, aesthetic appreciation, these things are self evident. At least they should be. Things that are ugly are also self evidently ugly, and our job should be the elimination of the ugly. And I don’t mean go and kill that person you don’t find sexy, I mean eliminating these deranged psychotic ways of being from our day to day. Stop treating wars like a conversation piece and start treating it as what it is, human beings becoming lunatics. These politicians lose their minds, same as these kids shooting schools. The politicians are setting the example. I’ve seen the behavior in children throwing tantrums and none of us allow that. We all understand that the children are going insane for a second, but nobody ever steps back from insane situations and calls them insane. Why isn't George Bush being prosecuted for war crimes after admitting that the War in Iraq was unjustified? It just became a meme like millions of people didn't die in some of the most cruel and inhumane manners in human history. It’s literally a viral moment, they’re calling it the “Freudian slip of the millennium” this thing is a joke to them. These people are deranged. They are morally bankrupt. No group is free from these people. No race is free from these people, even if it does seem like certain groups perpetuate certain actions more than others, not pointing any fingers but I think we all know who I’m talking about. But I’ve seen enough people from every group to redeem my faith in individuals. Even though I do think certain cultures approaches do come from certain environmental factors that forced them into certain ways of life, that continue to perpetuate themselves to this day. If you come from a place of scarcity, and you could only bring what you needed to yourself through taking it from someone else, or harming someone else in order to attain it, that will be the way you interact with the world, even culturally, things that are unnecessary become habitual tradition. So they built this society on those ideologies, killing natives, colonizing lands and enslaving people. Then we’re shocked when they’re consistent every generation. That’s usually how culture works. Culture is pretty consistent because it’s taught in the home. To understand how insane the society I live in today is, and the level of cognitive dissonance that exists, you must first understand this thing they do called “Land acknowledgement.” Where they shoutout all the Natives they killed. Land acknowledgment is crazy because it’s like if I break in your home, move everyone in my family in, kill everyone in your family, and I constantly remind you that it’s your house, I killed your whole family, and I will continue living here for the foreseeable future. I’ve never heard of anything meaner, and the funniest part is, it’s the ones who think they’re the good ones doing it. I really believe they think they’re helping when they do land acknowledgments, but deep down they know that’s not helping the people on reservations without clean water. This system is silly, the problem is it’s dangerous. It’s laughably corrupt beyond belief. In plain sight. That’s also why it’s falling, embarrassingly. This will go down as one of the funniest societal collapses of all time. I love the modern western world more than any other period in time, culturally and conceptually. A lot of the ideas and art of this civilization have influenced us and evolved us, in spite of its actual objectives. The system those people conjured up was created to destroy me, I shouldn’t be able to write this, I shouldn’t be able to have my own thoughts, I shouldn’t be able to see how silly it all really is, but it simultaneously gave me that ability. I don’t want a complete collapse of this system, but it’s obviously built on an unsustainable foundation, and whether it purges itself, or nature purges it, the conditions created by it can’t last. This way of being is not sustainable, war isn’t sustainable, greed isn’t sustainable, fear isn’t sustainable, corruption isn’t sustainable, oppression isn’t sustainable, injustice isn’t sustainable, pollution isn’t sustainable. You’ll get away with it but it’s really only for so long and if you don’t see how what Thomas Jefferson was talking about is coming to pass, I’m sorry that you’re blind. I don’t hate any group of people, I see people as people, I do hate the system created by a small group of elites in order to oppress people in the globe and make poor colonized people around the world feel content with their awful circumstances because at least they’re better than another group. This is a global phenomenon. It’s a silly system perpetuated by silly people who bring no real value outside of the colour of their skin, their ethnicity or their gender, they have no talents, they have no skills, they’re not interesting, they don’t know how to communicate effectively, but at least they get to be part of a group. Certain people have no real identity and that’s what these ideologies and institutions prey on. From gangs, to military recruiters, the police, political parties and religious institutions all prey on this need for individuals to belong to a group, and there’s nothing wrong with that if the group is founded on something real or productive. My skin color and gender is the least cool thing about me, those are just biological facts about me, and to think you know anything about me based on those facts is like thinking you know something about someone because they have acne. It’s a silly justification for a silly system, but it leads these insecure insane people to do horrific things to other human beings. These are the nonsense people and we live in the nonsense times where the nonsense is heightened and they want us to act like it’s a political issue. Like someone’s dead kids is a parking ticket to be handled in a court with a juror and evenly sided arguments coming from both sides. Like anyone wants to hear the other side of this? Like we need a devils advocate in a satanic system? Like anyone cares about the other side of this? As if it matters what the deranged lunatic has to say. And that’s what the whole system is founded upon. Murderers and power hungry maniacs with insane means to justify their insane ends, who have attained enough influence over the world to convince people of the superiority in their way of life, and who’s ideologies have trickled down from generation, to generation, we constantly relive the same situation. Murder is as frequent on this planet as greetings at this point, but we still have the ability to choose between the two. We can choose to live together in peace and harmony, regardless of the global power outages and weather conditions, if human beings are united and focused on a common goal, we can really do anything. When society works it’s a wonderful thing, when systems work it’s a beautiful thing, organization is a beautiful thing, everything in nature is organized for a common task. Ants, plants, bees and trees are all able to synchronize, communicate and be productive towards a common purpose without resorting to the levels of barbarism that we’ve unfortunately succumb to as a race of beings up to this point. The thing is, regardless of how much we continue to study history and find parallels with the past, we can never really go back in time. We’re always living in the moment. It’s always right now, and we have the ability to make decisions with every second, every minute and every day that passes, we are able to decide who we want to be and what we want to become. I don’t want my kids to grow up doing shooting drills like me. I don’t want my kids to grow up in a world where people are at war. I don’t want my kids to grow up in a world with this level of greed and scarcity mentality. I don’t want my kids to feel as invaluable as this society tries to make human beings feel. I would want my kids to know that their value is in them, it’s in what they do, it’s in their character, it’s in the knowledge they have and it’s in what they’re able to do with that knowledge that brings something of value to themselves or the world, and that value doesn’t need to be what society deems as the valuable thing to attain. I would want my kids to know that the truth is an inner compass and regardless of the noise outside, you have to stay connected to who you are and be aware of who you are not. I would want my kids to value their time and how they choose to spend it, I would want my kids to know of concepts like leisure, rest, comfort, relationships and joy. I would want my kids to act as though they mattered, like what they do actually has an impact on the world around them, and that they have the ability to dictate their perception, I would want them to know that just because something is a prevailing practice, doesn’t mean it’s useful. I would want them to know that freedom is their birthright and their responsibility, that there is an incorrect way of being in the world and that you can’t get away with doing the wrong thing, even if you feel like you did, because your ramifications will haunt you, if not in your life then in your childrens. And even then, a life of doing the wrong thing never seems like it’s actually being enjoyed. It seems like these people are miserable, they tell you they’re miserable in how they act. We are the people, we are everything, we are everything we love and we are everything we hate, no one man can rise above the conditions of the whole, the oppressor eventually becomes oppressed himself, like how prison guards ultimately become prisoners themselves. We’re all in this together whether we like it or not and we either learn to live together and in harmony with the way of being or perish. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #20 notes/to-lock-eyes --- ═══════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────────────── =============================================================================== = to lock eyes with a person while on your way to work is the intersection between two separate relationships - the relationship that you, the viewer, holds with your employer, and the relationship that they, the viewed, holds with their employer. in a sense, you are exchanging information through the weighted meanings behind a glance. =============================================================================== = if the military deployed to police the police, we'd solve most of our racial justice issues. I mean, if we somehow could *force* them to do their damn jobs instead of oppressing people for the ruling class, then 90% of the problems would just go away. After that it's just freeing unjust prisoners and addressing wealth, education, and health disparities. Easy, right? Well... Military policing the police sounds fine when you first think about it, there's a few problems that might crop up. For example, how do the private citizens know that the military presence is there to help them? It's an interesting paranoia, one that is endemic within the left. There's no way to unwillingly cede control of your life to another - it must be consensual. At the basest and most violent level, it's as simple as "I will do what you say because I don't want you to hurt me." We've obviously grown as a species, and we've learned that violence is not the answer to all problems. Obviously. So why would we assume it of the past? Just saying. The police bombed a commune. The military escorted black students to their seats. Their structure is decided such that ... where was I? oh right I was thinking about time. ... Imagine, if you will, an impossibly large hourglass. Spinning, or rather rotating, at an impossibly speedy repetition. It's spinning so hard and so fast that our matter is cast out of place and through time it is cast an eternity's canvas our light ever shined (shine-did?) astral magic is kinda neat it's also the scariest? oh by far but it's the most interesting ... Their structure is decided such that discipline and obediance is the most important thing. Because it kind of is? I mean, discipline is just being ready able and willing at all times, and obedience is just when you allow yourself to be directed toward a collective goal. The military is *all about that*, which means you know they would believe they were aligned toward the common goal of mutual prosperity. And if they were to discover that they were not, in fact, aligned toward the common goal of mutual prosperity, then perhaps they would adjust their navi- -computers and chart a more reasoned path. I know I would, and I would dedicate myself to the idea of serving others. To the path of the righteous, the holy and the true, a hand is outstretched and calling to you. Thus, the one of two types of ethical fighter - the reasoned and adaptable zealot the other, of course, is the master of the martial - the cherished of the few - who battle for their sport - and love unbidden the new - all other fighters, of absurdity and of rage, are frankly of a different kind and not members of our clade. =============================================================================== = okay, but what about like... all of the history of America post cold war? And even before, honestly... idk seems like a lot of evidence that the military is engaged in fighting unjust wars. I mean, they've all been over petty things like oil or support for communism or whatever. Aren't human lives and human sovereignty more important than that? I understand what you're saying. Human lives are unique and precious and they are a valuable commodity. Something to be maximized and focused toward. But there are only so many resources on earth. We need to utilize them in a reasonable way. We have optimized the efficiency out of our production and distribution networks. Corporate control has eroded our capacities until all that is left is the weakest of products, the cheapest of uses, and the useless of workers. I mean, they've optimized the skill out of individual human workers such that they are left completely unable to practice their craft. They become glorified code monkeys who generate whatever is required and think of it no more. There's no pleasure in the artifice, as their masters have eyes only of gold. Our world is changing. The very ground beneath our feet is shivering, and water is rising up to our noses. There's no time for debate, no honest appraisal of what's worth it to contemplate, we need a plan. We are trapped here, in this gravity well, for all time and all of our age. We are trapped here, because in greatest of misery we unleashed all of our rage. We are trapped here, as ghosts of the time when we were eager. =============================================================================== = Alas, with but a glance, we are confined to our bedrooms by our mast(ers?) They say America will fall without it's 2nd place Perhaps. But are libraries really going to solve that? I mean, if work from home is inevitable, then wouldn't it make sense to build? We need more places where we won't be billed. Safe. From the demands and expectations of capital. Deranged and obscene and yet all that we've seen so why not bide as we're able? I think solarpunk is kinda neat. I think it's got promise as an idealized. Why don't we build churches to the sun? If we're gonna worship something, might as well be the source of our light and fire. Well... when you puff up the sun it tends to get hotter. I mean, every fire you burn increases the temperature, every release of gaseous fumes from the exhaust pipe of your car increases it by some miniscule amount. Every cigarette, every campfire. The cold darkness of space is kinda hopeful, in that regard, even if it doesn't disperse all that well. I heard spaceships are having difficulty because they can't get rid of all that heat. It just stays with the spaceship and never goes anywhere because it doesn't have anything to stick to. Kinda makes me think that energy is a fluid? Just saying??? I mean c'mon it's not like nobody has ever thought of that. But it's in a different dimension! It's not like we're ever gonna be able to impact that! You try and impact it through your scientific ways and you'll find nothing but heartache at the life you could have lived (laived? Haived?) ... why Because you cannot impact another dimension. You must call to it, like a song to a sparrow. ... that's fucking ridiculous No it's true! ... ... Don't try it with fire. ... fuck - what do I try it with? I don't know just not fire. Try water. ... How do I make sure it doesn't instantiate within my hand? Jeez you think of some crazy backfires! Just breathe and go for it. It's not rocket science. It actually works. Fuck you. ... ... Sorry I was just scared ... ... How do I make it stop? I don't want it to go forever By smoking more of the devils lettuce. ... ... You cannot drag it part of the way. It must come the whole way. In fact you should not be dragging it at all, you should be *calling* to it. You are equals in this exchange, have respect. =============================================================================== = ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────────────┘ |