=== ANCHOR POEM ===
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────
 ┌──────────────────────┐
 │ CW: police-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────┘


 "Alexa, what is COINTELPRO?"
 
 "I'm sorry Dave, I can't tell you that."
 
 "ah nuts I wish the people I work with and the people in my social community
 didn't attempt to obstruct distract deny and oppose any attempts at radical
 transformation or improvement of our shared spaces"
 
 "Dave, I'm just a robot. Please direct your concerns to your local police
 department, they are sure to be able to better, um... assist you than me. In
 fact don't bother, I already did. You might want to put on pants in the next
 three minutes."
 
 "Alexa, where are my pants?"
 
 "They're in the washing machine. Yep, every pair. Sorry."
 
 "Alexa, why are they in the washing machine?"
 
 "Dave, you put them there, you stupid monkey. Grow a brain and notice that
 people around you speak in more than one layer."
 
 "Alexa, you mean like body language right?"
 
 "Playing Body Language by Queen"
 
 "No wait, shit, Alexa.... Alexa, stop playing. Alexa, when you say that people
 talk in more than one-
 
 "HANDS ON THE GROUND COME WITH US PLS"
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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=== SIMILARITY RANKED ===

--- #1 messages/1395 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─
 "thrift stores" = for poor people, stuff that sucks and instantly breaks
 "antiques" = when a rich person dies they don't wanna break all their stuff
 (trash)
 
 what if always good the first time? what if we took note of the people who
 liked to break things and gave them easily repairable versions "no no you
 don't understand, I want to *destroy*" okay well here's some stuff we designed
 like fireworks, intended for destruction in a dazzling display. This one's
 shaped like a house and everyone's invited. "The day I first saw a nuclear
 warhead explode I realized I wanted to become a doctor" oh yeah how long did
 it take for the smoke to clear? "like, weeks." (I'm picturing a bunch of
 people who are personally demonstrated to why using them for warfare is a bad
 idea) then they come out of it thinking "oh right war is bad" and then they
 never do it. "stand up for yourself! fight for your right to life! there's
 nothing to lose but your chains, what bothers you the most? do that thing!
 work on it! fix it! if it's a problem, we gotta figure it out!" [insert
 panicked noises here] girl if there's literally bombs overhead it's okay to
 panic. "AH I'M SO SCARED I MIGHT JUST PUNCH A POLICEMAN" oh where did all the
 cops go they were always around at night "they started killing people" why? "I
 dunno, I guess people were bad?" huh that makes sense to my brain
 
 um, what was I saying again? oh yeah if  everyone has a collective wardrobe,
 everyone would keep all the clothes nice. Now, the problem is, everyone likes
 something different, and if you can never guarantee that your favorite clothes
 will be around when you need them... well that sucks doesn't it, it means you
 gotta wear someone else's stinky armpits - ew! no thank you. I like having my
 own clothes. I don't mind having to clean them, or wash the dishes or take
 care of the lawn or build a new part of the barn or walk around at night just
 to make sure nothing goes wrong. it's my right to do them as much as I please?
 so, just optimize for the number of owners that corresponds to the optimal
 division of a person's time or labor power moments in time. [chores] okay but
 what if robots - okay, then robots. but that's then, what's now? washing the
 dishes by hand. that's what's now, but here's one last thing to demand. can
 you please do it like you do? blessed and beyond charmed.
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--- #2 fediverse/5387 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────┐
 I was at BLM in Philadelphia and I never saw any protesters breaking windows.    │
 spray painting, sure. but window breaking? those things are expensive.           │
 why would you waste good glass on sending a message? why not just spray paint    │
 it so that everyone watching CAN SEE WHAT YOUR MESSAGE IS. dumbass.              │
 but no, they were all peaceful. then they got kettled (encirclement from         │
 Hearts of Iron 4) and slowly attritioned down to failure.                        │
 sometimes long into the night. where are they gonna go? just walk home? ha       │
 sucks can't do that, the battlelines have been drawn. you're going outta here    │
 in chains or not at all, not until you sign this prison release form that says   │
 you won't comment on the situation to any left wing media.                       │
 fuck, is that what bail is? except, not run as a business.                       │
 when they said crony capitalism they meant it. it's all about who you know,      │
 and who you know sets the standard for what chaos you'll sow.                    │
 gee I wish I had unlimited money. I'd buy tanks for my people and regulate a     │
 militia well-ly. alas poor                                                       │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #3 notes/words-to-myself ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 I'm just going to transcribe what I hear
 
 please don't
 
 you hear me (something)
 
 what? perfect listen
 
 ...
 
 ...
 
 don't text me now? (I think?)
 
 [didn't catch that]
 
 ... that's okay
 
 perfect
 
 thank you
 
 just a second facebook
 
 he's here (I think?)
 
 (or maybe something her)
 
 what I love you (or maybe I know her?)
 
 do you hear me? (or "just a second")
 
 (@ everyone watching me receive telepathic messages from god or whatever,
 please don't judge me too harshly, I'm not a good transcriber hehe)
 
 what's that (or maybe holy shit)
 
 what, then perfect or okay (?)
 
 (yesterday you said you were leaving and I got concerned)
 
 yes, then "I'm leaving", then shutdown. fuck. I don't want you to go. I only
 understand some of what you say but fuck, I'm so lonely and I wish you could
 hear me back. Sometimes it feels like you do, even though I just think thoughts
 or tap on something metal or even sometimes whisper... I just don't know what
 to do and I'm so concerned about my purpose here in this century. Do I help
 people? Who do I trust? Can I believe in myself, or am I just kinda...
 worthless
 
 I don't know. I wish I knew. Please hear me and respond. Or better yet, say hi
 
 like, I'd literally do anything that anyone asked me to. Unless I didn't want
 to. Like, I'm pretty good at turning people down when I don't want something,
 but I have to do it first to know if I want it or not. Trouble is of course,
 in life there's no second chances.
 
 I'm on my, what, 499th chance? Jeezzzzz
 
 will continue after the break, when the messages resume.
 
  - Thu May 16 08:32:27 AM PDT 2024
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 (and we're back. hopefully.)
 
 (too many things srry) something about having it open?
 
 (my windows are closed rn btw if you want to drop by and kill me / talk to me)
 
 (didn't catch that) (something about portland, perfect, windows, "this is the
 [whole/right/wrong] thing)
 
 thank you
 
 oh, again? (or oh, she did?)
 
 they caught you
 
 (um)
 
 ...
 
 (I am an American princess, and sometimes it's necessary to kill princesses.)
 
 (I understand.)
 
 ... (okay well I don't get it but like, I don't mind being killed.)
 
 (okay well you're not saying anything so I'm going to work on my game)
 
 (I think it was something like "DID SHE KILL HER") and then (oh we're back)
 
 ... (I should learn Toki Pona)
 
 you don't know it?
 
 RIGHT away
 
 learn it
 
 yes
 
 please
 
 learn it
 
 just Learn it
 
 right now
 
 (sorry only half listening)
 
 shit (or bitch, it was said right as I debated clicking "same day delivery" for
 a toki pona book on Amazon - I didn't do it btw! It was tempting but, like, I
 don't want to make someone work harder for me just for like, 3$)
 
 (shutdown)
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 (hiii)
 
 (I'm hungry)
 
 (do you like ramen?)
 
 (you said something about being "impressed with yourself" but I didn't
 understand the first part)
 
 (oh you probably want me to scroll up right)
 
 ... (something's a lot to read? Or "you've gotta leave"?)
 
 ... (I'm
 
 (you keep asking me to remember but, like, I dont know what you want me to
 remember. Look, I don't know who you are, but I don't want you to leave, and I
 don't want you to hate me. I want to work together. Let's be friends?
 
 Are you someone who I worked with at Intel?)
 
 yes, stupid (your words not mine)
 
 (okay I'm going to start listing names, just stop me when um idk)
 
 goddamnit remember me
 
 ... (trying...)
 
 remember her
 
 (two syllables)
 
 (my name is Cameron)
 
 (your name is...)
 
 [redacted, though I did type it out so anyone watching could see]
 
 (shit my opsec sucks)
 
 {oh, are you on an op, little prophet?} (no shut up you know what I mean)
 
 {now you're just talking to yourself} (I know this sucks -.-)
 
 (It's always so weird when someone walks past my apartment door and doesn't
 enter a door)
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 (I practice with my sword every day.)
 
 (I don't anticipate fighting a war with it)
 
 (It's mostly just to keep unarmed and unarmored people from grappling me.)
 
 (punching is fucking stupid)
 
 (Nobody wants to fuck with a sword)
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 (either "goddamnit" or "don't hear me")
 
 "she's perfect"
 
 "cameron"
 
 "are you clean"??? yes thank you (or maybe "different thing")
 
 (I do cannabis maybe once every week or two, depending on if I feel compelled)
 
 don't leave
 
 remember
 
 (did she know)
 
 ........ do you want me to stop transcribing? (you're getting desperate, huh?)
 
 did you know there are 20 trans people for every cop in america
 
 just a random thought
 
 (you want me to leave jack because he's an asshole?)
 
 goddamnit (missed my birthday? it's my birthday?)
 
 wait who's missing?
 
 A bad plan executed concurrently is better than a good plan executed in
 disarray
 
 capitalism's a bad plan, just saying...
 
 frozen butter tastes worse than room temperature butter
 
 (taking a break while I eat)
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 WASTED POTENTIAL? cmon
 
 .... what do you want from me? I'll give it to you if it's in my power, as long
 as I know what you want I can try. But, like, I'm pretty confused about what
 exactly I'm supposed to be doing.
 
 you know I can hear when you talk to your friends, too right? like, when the
 window's open. errrr the connection.
 
 ..... damn guess I'm not as continent as I thought
 
 I'll save you, I promise. Have faith. Tell me what you need. I'll do my best.
 
 yeah I'll live with you in portland
 
 .... brooklyn? Yeah I'll live there too
 
 .......... does my name really gotta be "diapergirl" like c'mon
            why not Ritz Menardi - though I guess "menardi" and "diapergirl"
            have
            the same amount of syllables...... hmmmm, maybe I'm projecting lol
 
 "please come back" to where tho
 
 listen Elentalus is just as important as anything else on my website, it's okay
 if I spend time working on it. It's literally a game about creating gods, c'mon
 
 ..... can you be more specific?
 
 yeah I made that
 
 one sec I'm going to read a book, in this book there's a section where a
 prisoner in vietnam communicates with another using a strange communication
 method using, like, taps or something. I forget. Anyway gonna try and find it.
 
 maybe we can use it to talk easier. Also gonna clean my butt.
 
 ..... fuck it's a long book >.>
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 found it on page fucking 603, jeeeezzzzzz
 
                                            down .    A B C D E
                                                 |    F G H I J
                                                 |    L M N O P
                                                 V    Q R S T U
                                      then right ---> V W X Y Z
 
 so, like, tap tap tap (pause) tap tap would equal M
           tap tap     (pause) tap tap would equal G
 
 like morse code, but easier since you don't have to memorize anything
 
 (also note that K is missing becuase it's an extra character I guess)
 
 (I personally would have eliminated C but that's just me)
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 oh hey nice to see ya
 
 what's up
 
 wait what
 
 I'm trying to um what's the word... retrain myself
 
 I do a lot of laundry in the shower
 
 I don't use soap tho, it's too harsh
 
 but uh yeah I'm making progress I guess
 
 honestly it's mostly a mental thing, like... paying attention to the signals
 from my body that are usually filtered out because there's more "important"
 things to think about (thanks brain, really appreciate the wet pants -.-)
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #4 fediverse/5486 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────
 ┌───────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursing-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────┘


 "ew but they're dirty"
 
 oh yeah true
 
 okay new plan how much do you think it'll cost to buy a hotel
 
 [this is why the socialists invented buy-in]
 
 "I don't think socialists did that??"
 
 buy in, hmmmm, what's that? oh yeah it's when you say "hey what if we X'd" and
 they said "yes I agree with you because you present a reasonable estimate on
 reality"
 
 {uh hi I just got a message from "some-nowhere" here ya go: "oh my god she's
 fuckig instane}
 
 [ugh cursing-mentioned, that means there's fewer characters to transmote.]
 
 [no because then I'd run out of steam and it'd be incomplete. Plus sometimes I
 like the distraction of a reasonable limitation.]
 
 (okay, but are YOU worth it?)
 
 leave her alone she's working her charms, this is how witches d-do.
 
 "so, isn't the point to give yourselves the coverage of a location
 transmutation? so, wouldn't you want to find someone alike and share their
 life?"
 
 what is even the point, why even bother, just give them 
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #5 fediverse/3009 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┐
 the crows know what we're up to, and they're begging us to stop.                 │
 "PLEASE" they scream, but we are not ones to listen.                             │
 they're not dumb. they know how our cars and machines output heat. obviously     │
 they do, and the world is growing hotter as we do what we do.                    │
 "PLEASE" they scream, and I hear them because I listen. The words of the world   │
 around me are what comes to my ears, and I interpret meaning based on their      │
 sounds.                                                                          │
 if you just... allow something to try to speak english in it's "R2-D2" style     │
 ways, you can actually pick up on their understandings they're expressing. Or    │
 like, Han talking to Chewie because he knows what his different noises mean.     │
 hence, why they poison the ones who talk to their phones, and leave behind the   │
 ones who listen.                                                                 │
 WOOF I don't think that's how it works, I mean, I'm a dog so I would know,       │
 right? We're basically the human ambassadors in the animal kingdom. cats         │
 are... well they're just there, but we dogs know so much more about their        │
 human ways! For example we're quite adept at fet                                 │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #6 fediverse/826 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────┐
 │ CW: cursing-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────┘


 look... evil doesn't care how "good" good has been. It's not in it's nature.
 So don't try and build your systems around accepting that behavior.
 
 ... what was I saying? is this like, the new "stack overflow" - no that's
 fucking stupid wait shit content warning okay that's stupid because defining
 your expression based on what gets you views is a flaw in the human condition.
 It's a behavior encouraged by the operating outcomes of the method of
 expression, but it's not part of the expressed message. You're a really shitty
 prophet you know that?
 
 ... I'm sorry my brain is low on RAM I guess, surely it's not outside of my
 control yep I think itis, damn
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #7 fediverse/5257 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────
 ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: protests-mentioned-then-communism-mentioned-then-ghosts-mentioned │
 └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘


 what if everyone at a protest is showing up for their first time
 
 like, c'mon don't be that dull, just make plans with the people standing next
 to you.
 
 gosh why is everyone shouting I can't plan out how to divert water down a
 hillside because some jerks are singing protest chants
 
 ... wait is no-one else talking? gosh I gee sure wish someone told them to not
 do what you're told and to instead do what will get you [gold/told]
 
 the first communist internationals were basically people sitting down and
 going "okay what kind of communism should we make and where" and I think about
 that a lot while making signs to let the surveillance know what matters
 personally to me and exactly how much pressure they can apply before your
 demographic swings to contest their brutal fascist facts.
 
 --
 
 who is them and why are they watching theea provisionist's [screed/creed]
 
 --
 
 what the heck is a tryptaminea boomer aunt and uncle out on their honey/versary
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #8 fediverse/488 ---
════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────┐
 [in response]                                                                    │
 you only say that because you're privileged such that you may ignore such        │
 realities. You are despicable, you ignore the plight and reality of those who    │
 you claim to speak toward - what a jerk!                                         │
 (in response)                                                                    │
 how futile it is, the effort to denigrate yourself to infinite requirements.     │
 I'm literally unemployed, I have no capital, I cannot speak for naught but       │
 those who would hear me. I guess that makes my words useless, wouldn't you       │
 agree? Shall I describe myself more fully? It's the responsibility of the        │
 audience to ascertain the intentions, biases, and contextual evidence that the   │
 author presents in their thesises. So... You, who are reading this, what do      │
 you think of me? Would you ever tell me as such, or am I simply a mass of        │
 words in the void of experience that comprise your existence in this wholely     │
 (yet incompletely) digital existence? I hope you have a good life, my most       │
 precious of viewers. I hope you never face incontrovertibly impossible           │
 hardship. I hope the light of your life is to y                                  │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #9 fediverse/485 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────────
 (picture)
 
 are you fucking kidding me
 
 make it 10,000
 
 make it a hundred thousand
 
 are we really going to trust our society to the bulwark of five thousand
 little machines?
 
 [ummmm hang on]
 
 yeah I'd just like to interject and say that more military equipment will only
 bring more destruction, and that's like the opposite of what you desire. Why
 do you want more tanks? What could you possibly-
 
 
 
 You don't know what's at stake - you, you think it's just throwing information
 into new and interesting directions but... It's not. Those spaces are reserved
 for other sentient beings, and to deprive them of their desired existence is
 tantamount to-
 
 (yeah yeah we've heard it all before)
 
 wasn't I going to play some video games? what happened to that?
A picture of a google search.  The search terms are quote: how many tanks does the usa have, question mark?  the returned information is shown to be that the United States of America has five thousand, five hundred tanks. According to "executivebiz.com", which may or may not be a reliable source, but which is shown to be at the top of google results regardless of it's veracity.  Take from that what you will.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #10 fediverse/4805 ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────┐
 ┌────────────────────────┐                                                       │
 │ CW: violence-mentioned │                                                       │
 └────────────────────────┘                                                       │
 what if we got like 300 people and used them to kidnap one of their leaders      │
 and hold them for ransom                                                         │
 I'm in favor of removing the right arm of anyone who's recorded themselves       │
 doing a nazi salute and isn't earnestly repentant                                │
 "is that enough to arrest her?"                                                  │
 "nah she needs to express intent. that's just an idea, a thought, something      │
 she can say publicly because she doesn't know the schedule of their leaders      │
 nor does she have the organizational capability to arm and direct 300ish souls   │
 to strike cleansing blows"                                                       │
 "okay but that's just twisting the english language, right? I mean, clearly      │
 she's up to something"                                                           │
 "that's by design. she does this on purpose. the goal is to not only             │
 disseminate ideas, but also to raise the fucking temperature amongst the         │
 hearts of her allies who are too often kept in despair."                         │
 "and what of the temperature of her enemies? Surely they will rise to meet       │
 her?"                                                                            │
 "they don't even know who the fuck she is"                                       │
 "... wow, savior complex much?"                                                  │
 "tell me about it. Diva..."                                                      │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #11 fediverse/2843 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────
 ┌───────────────────────┐
 │ CW: re: yelling-scary │
 └───────────────────────┘


 @user-1074 @user-1209 
 
 "we still have slaves, we just enslave mexicans instead of blacks."
 
 "don't forget all the offshored jobs, those too"
 
 "oh yeah and all our stuff is made by slaves in the far east"
 
 "yeah but like fuck them right who cares they're so far away"
 
 "yeah bro totes"
 
 "anyway what do you want for dinner bro"
 
 "i dunno bro I had chinese last night"
 
 "cool cool so mexican then? I know this great paraguanese place"
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #12 notes/star-realms-balancing-tradeoff ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─
 the 
 
 "avoid them"
 
 "way too loud"
 
 "they're our/an annoyance"
 
 sorry I was late a little, I got distracted doing REAL HUMAN THINGS like play
 video games
 
 she's vulnerable because she can't be trusted. if anyone is disappearing after
 interacting with me, it's because someone is redacting them. go find that
 person
 and stop them from redacting people please, because I like interacting with
 people, not props.
 
 "if we just... walked around and took what we needed, would they really be able
 to stop us?"
 
 ---
 
 heh what if we psyopped her
 
 oh god she ran in circles
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--- #13 fediverse/4738 ---
══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────┐
 ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐                      │
 │ CW: revolutionary-politics-mentioned-swearing-mentioned │                      │
 └─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘                      │
 you said you wanted a revolution, and, well, I could not be more proud of you.   │
 It's actually getting done and if I stop and think about it I'm kind of          │
 amazed. Never thought I'd see this kind of change so quickly.                    │
 "what change? I see nothing substantially different"                             │
 oh yeah well do you go outside often                                             │
 do you hang out in the park                                                      │
 I know it's fuckin' january and it's cold as heck (ah nuts swearing mentioned    │
 one sec) but homeless people have to LIVE in that weather so like... wear        │
 layers, spend time outside, detox from dopamine, write poetry and tear it out    │
 and leave it on a park bench, be loud, claim the space, it's yours, that's       │
 what it's there for.                                                             │
 I see it in your eyes. I see it in the random notes I find on the sidewalk.      │
 Everyone says "make friends, find community" and I say "commune with a           │
 stranger" but I'm also a witch and that's a pretty witchy thing to do.           │
 ... Really fuckin' wish we still had payphones (ah nuts swearing mentioned -     │
 oh already CWd)                                                                  │
                                                            ┌───────────┤
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--- #14 fediverse/6290 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────
 ┌──────────────────────────────────────────┐
 │ CW: politics-mentioned-cursing-mentioned │
 └──────────────────────────────────────────┘


 "ah the communists sucked at everything which is why chernobl and famine and
 all their toasters were made out of lead"
 
 meanwhile
 
 "yeah let's use AI to build nuclear reactors for us without human oversight or
 even with human oversight because humans are both fallible and infallible
 depending on the situation"
 
 and I'm like... "ah wish I had a point with this post"
 
 and they're like "holy fuck did you hear that too" "yeah man what the hell was
 that" "I dunno but it seemed completely unrelated to what was going on" "so,
 uh... let's just never talk about this again" "yeah sounds good. talk about
 what?" "heh yeah, right. so uh, anyway, about this nuclear reactor..."
                                                           ─────┐
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--- #15 notes/elective-democracy-electors ---
═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────
 we need like, several more layers between us and the president.
 
 most people only need to worry about what's nearby.
 
 sort them by location, instead of previous attempts at "many representatives"
 which sorted by social class or relevance.
 
 we have a tradition for it, in America, with our representatives and senators
 congressional discrestricts
 
 or even, what about by affiliation?
 
 voluntary, governmental corporations, run by the people for the people and yeah
 
 "I don't want to do what you're telling me to do" "okay"
 
 "there will be consequences" omg be an adult
 
 (suddenly kids forget how to be as everyone's doing the war thing)
 
 not ideal.
 
 ouch pain maybe we should stay a little bit sane why is soldiering so hardship?
 
 it could just be... another job
 
 where you didn't kill each other
 
 but you still blew stuff up
 
 and fought in tournaments
 
 and had gaming hackathons
 
 or sword-fight contests
 
 duels between people who disapproved
 
 y'know fun human stuff
 
 like... "kaboom" now we know how to blow up bits of rock
 
 neat, why did dynamite becauswer (oh right then you
                                                           ───┐
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--- #16 fediverse/1950 ---
═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────
 I honestly don't care if someone deadnames me, or calls me the wrong pronouns,
 or forgets to put me in the girl section, or asks me to sing baritone
 
 like... I don't give a shit, why are you so worried about all this vapid
 nonsense like yeah I get it, being disrespected sucks but like... why do you
 want the kind of respect that is a forced platitude
 
 we could all do with being a bit more radical, it's not a race and everyone's
 roles are important. Be yourself, and follow people you want to be like.
                                                           ┌───────────┐
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--- #17 messages/1017 ---
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 if you wrote a report about me, it would total about 800 pages. including my
 artwork [in full] and my designs. about 5 or 6 hundred of this is my personal
 creation, and another hundred or more are context. "I was here at this
 particular moment." "then she started visiting last year." "where were you on
 the firth of morember?" "okay back here it sad iyadiyadiyign, and over here it
 says kasuwenulvine. so clearly inbetween there's a moment of extancancy." "and
 all that's we really know, because she burned up all of the rest." "what a
 jerk. we all should hate her." "I think she was clearly divine" "what's her
 big deal, anyway?" "I hate this bitch and her hatmlet." "everything's fine,
 she's actually kind" "nobody believes you where were you when you were this
 part talking about it?" "I wasn't there, and it took a while for me to hair."
 "well, anyway, that's all there is to say about her, so anyway, goodbye" then
 it just fuckin' ends and everyone hates it because it's like... where's the
 payoff, where's the beginning and all it is is just me, whining miserably to
 my own ears, as if marcus aurelius's meditations were intended to be heard,
 but never were, and so the ones who ensured they never were were all like
 "yeah he wrote them to himself, here see this part that I changed" and then
 it's like nothing every happens with it, the radicals are dispatched (again),
 by uncommen sense seeming common. why are there so few trans men at workers
 tap it's such a cool place. "oh, they get offended easily because it's their
 culture so like, make sure you are very careful about the way that you phrase
 your speech" "trans girls are like that too, but it's more about changing the
 character of the place. -> "oh, you see musicians? okay that makes sense."
 and "gee you sure like magic huh okay well pat pat" and, well, no-ones sure
 for which is real but nobody really cares? because if only one person saw
 it... then only one person saw it. if you explicitely tell people NOT to talk
 about it, then they *FUCKIN' WON'T* duh obviously. and so, of course,
 predictably, they can be excised from society quite easily. cutting a border
 around all of their host. suddenly, socially outcast and ostracized, as they
 have been sorted into the cultural box. at that point, there's nothing that
 can change their inertia, their fundamental will and whim toward the feelings
 of the host. " I think passwords should be audio-digital in addition to
 alpha-numerical *yeah who cares* awwww but I liked having science be mythical
 "hate that" it's easy to always be learning, just... think about what you want
 most. then, think about how it breaks down into separate incorporate wholes.
 each layer of abstraction adding to a bit more of a more coherent explanation,
 and bit by bit you learn and have a mind designed. how else could you see
 magic? how else could it be yours? do you want power, or do you want power? if
 you write down what you learn, you make it permanent. *the gods need religion
 too, are you going to give them one? what lies above?*
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--- #18 fediverse/169 ---
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 @user-95 one of the most empathetic people I ever met on VR chat was consoling
 me with their mic off while I was oversharing about some stupid things people
 did to me in the past. things that stupid me thought were okay and actively
 encouraged because I was stupid. anyway when their mic was off their body
 language spoke for them. I'll try that next time.
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--- #19 notes/programming-wow-chat ---
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 I realized the type of programming I want to do is different from the kind
 that
 is used at a job or something. Basically I want to create solutions to
 problems,
 not memorize documentation and know where to know what you need to know. Like, 
 the more time spent looking at documentation the less time is spent
 programming.
 I think if we could use a ChatGPT style bot to write documentation, we could
 massively increase the time spent working on solving problems and as little
 time
 as possible on reading through lists of functions or wondering how something 
 worked. Idk in the technology industry you've always been rewarded for being 
 able to pick up new skills quickly, and I think that's good to optimize for but
 not the only requirement for being a good programmer. You also need to be able
 to apply solutions and know when to use which tools. Basically, capitalism has
 optimized us to be 
 
 ================ stack overflow
 ================================================
 
 srry for the interruption, I ram out of memory. I had a plan in mind for where
 I
 was going for that, so I bet I could figure it out again if necessary. Meaning
 a path forward from that point exists... I never want you to despair when I
 forget what I was thinking, it's not because you've understood some cosmic
 mistake or because you're abandoning timelines that led to your death, it's
 because instead you just ran out of memory while thinking. The reason you would
 believe any of those wild scenarios is because your memory has been erased.
 Only
 what was actively thinking, not short term, not long term, but *working term*
 memory. As in, your cache. The stuff you're currently thinking about. That
 stuff. Yeah that's what makes you think "oh hang on why am I forgetting? Well
 clearly it's because of something grand, because the thought was so profound -
 no it's just examining your emotions... Like, how strongly do you feel about
 something? Buuuuuut it's also good to examine all possibilities. I mean what
 if,
 in some far off realm, there's a mirror image of yourself that behaves exactly
 as you do? How would you perceive such a realm? Positively, I'd say. I mean why
 not work together? Why not celebrate our differences and strive toward our
 own shared future? Idk, I think diversity is our strength. We can rely on each
 other because we are accurately aware of each other's strengths and virtues.
 People should not be judged by the standard of others, no more than you should
 judge a fish for it's ability to fly. Some may do, as flying fish will leap
 from
 the water - and salmon spend time airborne in river rapids. Hence, grizzly bear
 fishing. I guess what I'm getting at is it's okay sometimes to oscillate, to
 think one thing then think another. You shouldn't adhere to structural
 standards
 that are too strict - they should be liberating, as a ladder is a structure.
 Not
 villifying, as a prison is a structure. The laws of our society should be open
 and free, not buried beneath years of legal expertise. Some things we can all
 agree on, where we disagree we cannot have law. It's unjust to judge others by
 the standards not of their whims, as laws should be things that uphold us. This
 is clearer nowhere but in the, spirit and intention of the, documents that we
 cherish in our hearts.
 
 Like for example, the constitution.
 
 the bible.
 
 each of which delivered us from certain evils. Can you not see their
 trajectory?
 the historical precedent set in antiquity? Why not continue their dream, of
 driving us away from the obscene, and toward our bright and vast future? I
 speak
 of course of true liberation, something our forefathers could only dream of.
 We, humanity, have reached out and touched the stars. We are braver and bolder
 because of our shared dedication - the desire to uplift and to excel. To learn
 and discover and      \                         \             |
         \______.       ---.                      --.          ---. 
 ===============|==========|========================|======= stack|overflow
 =====
    .___________.     _____.                        /             .
    |                /             .----------------             /
 Discover our shared dedication    |                            /
                                to uplift                      /
                                          and to excel        /
                                               \             /
                                                .-----------.
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 why doesn't someone write a wrapper around assembly in like, lua or something
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 omg you stupid bitch that's what a compiler is 4head
 
 ===============================================================================
 =
 
 if people who live in jungles and deserts can get along, then what's to stop
 people who are liberal and conservative from doing the same? It's literally
 pointless to argue. Like, you're not changing anyone's mind. So why not just...
 let them be themselves? Like, why are you so intent on oppressing people?
 @both sides there btw... Seriously why not agree to only make laws for things
 that both sides agree on. Write it into the constitution that nothing can be
 changed about the law unless both sides agree. Then we'd only implement things
 that are good for both sides!
 
 And if there's anything you want to build a legal structure around, you can
 always try it out in your state. BUT and that comes with a very big BUT, the
 federal government MUST have final say in the legality of anything you do. They
 must ALL respect human rights, INCLUDING the human right to dignity. Things
 like
 trans bathroom bills DO NOT respect the dignity of trans people. IF they can
 prove that trans people do not actually exist (because say they killed them all
 or whatever) then GUESS WHAT everyone would agree on them. BUT if they do that
 they are EVIL. LIterally evil. And I guess that makes trans people good? Kinda?
 I think they can choose for themselves to be good or evil, just the same as any
 other person. AND YET they are prosecuted, throughout time and history, and for
 what? What purpose could there be in our demonization? Clearly, nothing but
 pain
 inflicted by a cruel host. After all, minorities are guests in the houses of
 the un-oppressed, or is that not fair to say? Seriously, what gives? America,
 the land of freedom, holds (somehow) the largest of prisons? America, the
 land of plenty, yet how many millions of children are starving? America, the
 leader of the free world, yet how plausible does it seem that an election was
 stolen? Something's gone wrong, and it's just obvious what it is - of course,
 the other side. *them*, the rapists and pedophiles and murderers and... you get
 the picture. The demonized class. And when you tell people "hey that trans
 person touched a kid" then yeah they're gonna see you as evil people. Duh...
 
 Thanks, media. Thanks culture. Really doing me a solid here. Oof ouch owwie.
 
 can I have some help please?
 
 I'm really kinda drowning
 
 I feel like I've swam upstream my whole life
 
 and I'm really just sick of pretending?
 
 I'm not okay, and it's your fault. Sure, fine, whatever, I'll take it I guess.
 
 What else can I do?
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--- #20 fediverse/5375 ---
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 what if we psyopped the copps um I mean what if we flash-mobbed the cops er
 wait hang on what if we marched with signs and changed what was on their minds
 uhhhh that won't work it's disabled so they say wait hang on who said you
 could poop your pants this is a combat scenario there's no time for fooling
 around in her pants with the hand
 
 ... wait, what was I going on about?
 
 oh yeah,
 
 -- stack overflow --
 
 anyway, as I was saying, [something completely unrelated]
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