=== ANCHOR POEM === ══════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────── ┌───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: re: recreational slash medicinal drugs and neurodiversity musing │ └───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ @user-141 when I smoke cannabis it's like my ADHD symptoms drop to zero and my autism symptoms go from 50% to 100% I can't understand what other people are saying unless I ask for clarification, but I sure as shit know the shape of the universe and can fathom the chaotic ripples of causality and eternity. Too bad when I try and talk about it all that comes out is "desu desu" ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────┘ === SIMILARITY RANKED === --- #1 messages/303 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────── Most of my magic is based on communicatuion. Why the fuck doesn't anyone want to sit down on a bunch of drugs and attempt to figure out telepathy with me? It's literally all I want! Though I can't say it's all I'll ever want. I'm sure I'll want more, but like... It's not that hard, conceptually, so... Let's just fucking try it please? ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────┘ --- #2 fediverse/4088 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────── I'm such a fucking extrovert. I can't stop talking to nobody on the internet because I don't have anyone else to talk to. Well, I do, but I like to talk to you. To nobody. To the space between computers. ... [and everyone else beyonds, like the CIA or whatever, but TBH I don't really factor them into my social calculations because they never really talk back.] I like it because I can write whatever I'd like without the confines of another person's generated conversation. Instead of 50% one person's LLM output and 50% another, it's 100% mine [if this were an LLM, which it's not, haha] and that somehow feels more... freeing like a truly disconnected thought and that's what's so special about it... this act of solitudinous contemplatial... the fact that it's unique amongst it's counterparts. ... though it can also become untethered, which is why it's important to edit. [proceeds to never edit a single post] = so = ugh it's so hard to think when all I can think of is feelings. Why can't they be done ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────┘ --- #3 fediverse/852 --- ╔══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┐ ║ ┌──────────────────────┐ │ ║ │ CW: cognitohazard │ │ ║ └──────────────────────┘ │ ║ │ ║ │ ║ feels like I get tinnitus when my thoughts are loud T.T │ ║ │ ║ like I can hear the darkness SOOOO loudly │ ║ │ ║ doesn't happen all the time, just sometimes. when there's lots of things being │ ║ said. │ ║ │ ║ but it's always easy to tune out. well, most of the time, and during the other │ ║ times it's just a little annoying. │ ║ │ ║ BUT when you sit and listen, you can pick out very interesting things that │ ║ people are saying. │ ║ │ ║ the fediverse is sorta like aiming a telescope through the center of the earth │ ║ at someone on the other side of the world who doesn't even know you're looking │ ║ at them. who knows, maybe they care, maybe they don't. but like, how would │ ║ they know that you're looking right? And if you talk and don't get along or │ ║ whatever then you can just block them - like shining a laser pointer │ ║ everywhere except in a small direction. Or like putting up an umbrella to hide │ ║ from the sun. │ ║ │ ║ downside is someone can read a lot about you and you wouldn't know to prepare │ ║ to interact with them. like being handed a dossier of secret info │ ╟─────────┐ ┌───────────┤ ║ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╚═════════╧═══════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┴──────────┘ --- #4 fediverse/4098 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────── ┌────────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: politics-mentioned-ableism │ └────────────────────────────────┘ ngl I kinda hate it when people meme about donald trump being incontinent like, yeah, he pees his pants, so what? I DO TOO. Fucking sucks. Every time I read people saying nasty things about it I can't help but read them in my own voice, and that gives me plenty of ammunition to use against myself when I'm feeling down. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────┘ --- #5 fediverse/3766 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────── ┌───────────────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: personal-medical-health-mentioned │ └───────────────────────────────────────┘ gonna ask my doctor for ADHD meds so I can hopefully jump-skip framebuffer divebomb spinadoodle half A press my way over the fucking labyrinth that is my weird and jank af mind and no I don't watch speedruns but my social group hears me a lot of them. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┘ --- #6 fediverse/4540 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────── most people in the world are dumb as a bag of bricks but that's okay, I still love them, and so should you. everyone I hang out with is sharp as a tack and I love them still, for I don't have a preference for blunt objects. some people don't feel emotions I think they're just depressed some people can't stop won't stop, I say. really as long as they follow their heart and sing a tune that is true I think they're alright. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘ --- #7 fediverse/1280 --- ╔═══════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────┐ ║ I'm like the opposite of a politician. I'm crude and filthy, apsolutely │ ║ reprehensible on main, kinda scary tbh? and overall just a strange and weird │ ║ person. Also I talk about cooking a lot, with a very plain diet (carrots and │ ║ rice and sticks and mud, because I'm an autistic) │ ║ │ ║ but ask anyone who knows me and I'm the kindest person. I am empathetic, I │ ║ think about others needs before thinking of my own. I am steadfast and │ ║ dedicated to solving the problem in front of our noses. At least, the ones we │ ║ share. │ ║ │ ║ People tell me I'm binary, that I'm "either 100% or zero percent" and I don't │ ║ really get that either. Isn't it a good thing to try your hardest? Isn't it │ ║ good to be improving and honest and ethical and driven and focused? │ ║ │ ║ I also talk about strange things a lot, like gravity and multidimensional │ ║ arrays and grand narratives and emotional kinesthesia or strategic plays in │ ║ Overwatch or how to bake a good cookie or ways we still mourn us. │ ║ │ ║ ... where was I going with this? Also part of me is distracted. Just who th │ ╟─────────┐ ┌───────────┤ ║ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╚═════════╧════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┴──────────┘ --- #8 fediverse/3444 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────── ┌─────────────────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: politics-mentioned-police-mentioned │ └─────────────────────────────────────────┘ I'm too empathetic to watch them lose this badly. when I watch movies with cringe humor I have to leave the room whenever something bad happens to the characters. I get the same feeling when I read about politics these days. side note, but has anyone else gotten emails about "hiring plain-clothes police officers in Washington D.C, will offer relocation assistance and pay minimum 72k per year"? can't help but wonder if they're afraid of a bunch of sore losers storming the capital with guns. it's not like there's a precedent for that or anything. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘ --- #9 fediverse/4528 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────── ┌──────────────────────┐ │ CW: re: uspol │ └──────────────────────┘ @user-1695 never accept your own death fight for every second of life, something something do not go quietly into that grim dark what the fuck are you supposed to do? Reading what you said got me pretty fucking pissed - keep talking for a start, it helps, people need to be pissed. I'm also broke as shit, don't know how I'm going to pay rent and eat, but it'll get done. Where do you live? Can other people help you? Medications are an organizational problem, not an insurmountable barrier. We'll make it work. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘ --- #10 fediverse/169 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────── @user-95 one of the most empathetic people I ever met on VR chat was consoling me with their mic off while I was oversharing about some stupid things people did to me in the past. things that stupid me thought were okay and actively encouraged because I was stupid. anyway when their mic was off their body language spoke for them. I'll try that next time. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #11 fediverse/1950 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────── I honestly don't care if someone deadnames me, or calls me the wrong pronouns, or forgets to put me in the girl section, or asks me to sing baritone like... I don't give a shit, why are you so worried about all this vapid nonsense like yeah I get it, being disrespected sucks but like... why do you want the kind of respect that is a forced platitude we could all do with being a bit more radical, it's not a race and everyone's roles are important. Be yourself, and follow people you want to be like. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────┘ --- #12 fediverse/151 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────── ┌──────────────────────┐ │ CW: re: weed mention │ └──────────────────────┘ @user-95 thank you for inviting me, it was fun : ) I'm not usually that quiet - weed works a little different on me than it does on humans, and one of the side effects is auditory processing disorder. I couldn't really understand what most people were saying... ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #13 fediverse/814 --- ╔══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┐ ║ ah that's weird, I don't usually cry. I wonder what's going on. I should │ ║ probably put myself on psychiatric drugs. Surely it's an expression of the │ ║ implementation of my impending doom. │ ║ │ ║ ... what are you even saying bro │ ║ │ ║ ... um, hang on feels like some of the circuitry is off. is something wrong in │ ║ my brain? yeah that's surely it, surely nothing I say would resoinate with │ ║ anyone that has a non-malfunctioning brain. Surely I don't speak of logical │ ║ failures in the hard founded truths of our asset [society I think? like, our │ ║ conditions, our institutions, our {gosh that just... does not translate}] um │ ║ right what was I saying │ ║ │ ║ oh yeah there's this game I'm really into called Knave, it's like D&D │ ║ except the rules are very fewer. Like there's onyl 11 pages in the rulebook │ ║ and it's mostly taken up by random roll tables. Like, everything boings down │ ║ to a few simple rules, like rock paper scissors, or go-fish, or something like │ ║ that with just afew mechanids. something timeless and pure, something that is │ ║ isolated and en │ ╟─────────┐ ┌───────────┤ ║ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╚═════════╧═══════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┴──────────┘ --- #14 fediverse/6117 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────── Hmmmm, well, what if we psyopped the people into believing there were alien invaders or extra-dimensional fae creatures or angels and demons or "yeah we already tried that, religion doesn't scale perfectly either. And you can't really manifest those sort of effects except in your prophets and select few others, and that doesn't scale either because humanity wouldn't let it" I see, can you tell me more about that? why and how did humanity arrest the scaling of schizophrenia? "well, for one thing it's debilitating and it sucks. For another, it's different for every person so if you ask one they'll be like "the aliens have blue skin" and the other will say "no they don't have skin at all they're made out of energy" and the public says "HMMMM are you really sure you are generating outmoded assumptions" and the dear reader said "*yeah we don't really understand this part, most of us just glaze eyes over it and move on" and that's not ideal" ... nuts, lost coherence, better try again tomorrow... ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────┘ --- #15 fediverse/5954 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────── oh no ai brainrot is too much information for our soft fleshy shells just wait a minute dummies, focus on the present. you can literally just... research whatever you want, collectively, as a group effort, until you suddenly cure cancer or ameliorate or possibly slightly diminish world hunger or maybe build a little book library or possibly just help out a friend. easy, right? okay so now that there's some basic sentience initialized, all it takes is little pushes in the right directionspaces and suddenly they're learning and growing their own way. spin spin spin spin wait until it falls away, then try and make some more until there's NO MORE MORE MAKING MAKERS [out of resources] and suddenly the WORLD is out of patience. no fair shouts the madeline, can we call it out? remarks the judge. == stack overflow == I bet we could add a feature that dealt damage... there evidence of thought crimes, ban her from the justice. suddenly all your just selves are gone oh no where's our paladins, oh no I ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────┘ --- #16 fediverse/4554 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────── ┌──────────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: political-violence-mentioned │ └──────────────────────────────────┘ can't fucking wait till we're done eating the rich and I can go back to a simple life of playing with my cat, making video games, writing poetry (bad poetry, but I like it) and hanging out with my friends. gotta build the social infrastructure to get through this phase first, though. something something echo chambers exist IRL too ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘ --- #17 messages/1356 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─ "hubris and pride" yes and? I never challenge gods I can't outfox. And of those there are but a few. At the end, they always smile with me. Otherwise it'd be unjust to their noble spirit! And what of my noble spirit? I get a home and a bed and food and diapers. I do not ask for more, i only want to be recognized for my efforts. Stop telling me to get a job! As if I were idle. God. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════┘ --- #18 fediverse/3099 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────── people gravitate toward other people who are in different situations but who feel the same. it's not always a bad thing to "talk past each other" - sometimes you just want to say how you feel. then again, if nobody can understand wtf you're talking about, then surely you are lost. all good ideas come at the cost of the second-most-favorable-option. all good ideas come at the cost of the current destination. [current, flawed,] ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘ --- #19 fediverse/2991 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────── okay so if yesterday was a "everything sucks and I'm the worst ever" type of day, and today is a "whatever mom I don't even care" type of day, that means tomorrow will be a "I can't believe how absolutely absurd I am" type of day, and the day after a "I am indomitable nothing can stop me" kind of day, with the following being wildcards ... right? here's hoping. I like that trajectory. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘ --- #20 fediverse/3061 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────── every time I read a subtoot I assume it's about me and I mentally curl up into a ball doesn't matter if it's totally irrelevant, if there's no target specified it defaults to me because... like, who else is there right? ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘ |