=== ANCHOR POEM === ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────── if you're meeting a friend from out of town the first time, it's best if they arrive early and you have the day off to show them around. or if they arrive late, you can meet them in a public place the next day and then spend time at your favorite spots. ideally, with people who would recognize you if the person from out of town decided to be hurtful and/or replace you. plus, that way you can gauge their character and decide whether or not you want them in your own home. they might be different than they are online, after all. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘ === SIMILARITY RANKED === --- #1 messages/1250 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════── if a bunch of people are in town for a conference then they should probably go confer. I think you can just... walk in to conference centers? you don't like, need an appointment or anything. There's often something going on, and if not, then you can at least wander around. maybe strike up conversations about industries you're in or things that you are thinking about lately or stuff you like like plant species or rock types or multidimensional solids or spheric sound or... actually that's pretty specific, here let's start with just bikeshedding (what does that mean again?) oh it's a cinema style where they take something and they put it in a bike out shed. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─┘ --- #2 fediverse/2855 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────── I refuse to be known by anyone who doesn't know me. But I'm always meeting people anew, so if they spent some time with me and saw more of my facets, perhaps they might come to know me. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘ --- #3 fediverse/2123 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────── Every time you see the same dog being dog-sat by another person it's an opportunity to make a new friend. or do you not know your apartment neighbors? do they not wander through your shared yards? the ones with dogs, at least. and no, I don't know many of my neighbors. these are considerations to be taken note of for future forethought planning. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────┘ --- #4 fediverse/5374 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────── @user-138 me neither... guess it's in-person for me. [a mysterious "they" then proceeds to set up microphones everywhere I might go] ah nuts why are all these people carrying phones around [they already know who I am, and I don't really want to be someone else, so] ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────┘ --- #5 fediverse/1438 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────────── ┌───────────────────────┐ │ CW: suicide-mentioned │ └───────────────────────┘ if you're gonna kill yourself anyway, might as well throw yourself at a cause you believe in. Ideally the kind that requires repeated attendance and lots of opportunities to make friends or forge communal bonds with people who can help you. honestly, what do you have to lose? sure it's hard, but nothing worth doing is easy. If it were, someone else would have done it already. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────────────┘ --- #6 messages/685 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────── If someone calls you in the middle of the night asking to be let in because they need a place to sleep, don't let them in! Unless you know them obvi but someone you don't know trying to manipulate you like "please I need some shelter" like, babe no, we need to know each other first, it's dark, I'm in my pajamas, c'mon. If it's below freezing then okay, maybe, but... They got themselves into that situation ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────┘ --- #7 messages/498 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────── An important aspect to friendship is "loose" time together - like, at a party, you might interact with a dozen people, or you might spend it all with one special someone - but the time is "loose" you can do with it what you will. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘ --- #8 fediverse/2276 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────── ┌──────────────────────┐ │ CW: pol │ └──────────────────────┘ A good way to get people talking is to meet with a stranger and share your feelings. Or, if you're scared of strangers, then try talking with a friend. "something something SUPREME COURT something whatever CRIMINALIZED PEOPLE blah blah blah I WON'T STAND FOR IT" that kind of thing. Make sure you look at your friend for the loud bits, and maybe look at someone else nearby when it's your friend's turn to speak. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘ --- #9 messages/156 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────── Here's what you say to clover next week: "hey. Wanna get coffee sometime? I need some trouble in my life. And I dunno, maybe you need a witch. You live in Tanasbourne, I live in Rock Creek. We're within walking distance of each other, so we might as well say hi right? I'm free whenever, just let me know if you'd like to meet me." ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #10 fediverse/2518 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────── it's good to be ethical, it's good to be kind, but there will always be assholes, and sometimes you're not having a good time it's okay it's fine assholes deserve life times deserve others to be kind life is not always interesting and that's often by design the moments of clarity, the moments of heart, these are what define you and display your own spark. trust in yourself. be kind to one another. you are braver than you know, and always a bit wiser. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘ --- #11 fediverse/6457 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───── the second rule is you don't have to hang out with mortals. there are places you can go where they won't find you, except by accident, and then you just go somewhere else. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────┘ --- #12 fediverse/2030 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────── Building community without structure is kinda like being a quest-giving non-player character in World of Warcraft. I don't mean that you stand around waiting for a player to wander nearby before shouting at them to do what you want. Not like that. Building community without structure is more like meeting someone randomly, knowing them for longer than a bus ride or a baseball game, and once you've decided that they're cool saying "hey there's someone you might like to meet." If they're into it, then talk to the other person, and see if they want to make a new friend. Try not to recommend someone who has a lot on their mind. If they hit it off, great! If not, oh well! Worst case scenario the coffee shop only sells two drinks. If you're gregarious enough, after a while you might even have enough people for a potluck. Just don't forget to keep adding, and eventually it'll start to feel more communal. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────────┘ --- #13 fediverse/2614 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────── literally just... if you want to connect to me, come hang out on my wavelength. or like, invite me to join yours, and I'll do my best to show how I feel about the things you share. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────┘ --- #14 fediverse/3031 --- ═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────── the things that I suggest we do when we hang out are not because those are the things I most want to do, but rather because they are the things that I think you'd want to do. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────┘ --- #15 fediverse/169 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────────────────────── @user-95 one of the most empathetic people I ever met on VR chat was consoling me with their mic off while I was oversharing about some stupid things people did to me in the past. things that stupid me thought were okay and actively encouraged because I was stupid. anyway when their mic was off their body language spoke for them. I'll try that next time. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════────────────────────────────────────────┘ --- #16 fediverse/3569 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────── ┌───────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: re: pol-tential-economics │ └───────────────────────────────┘ @user-1074 gotta start somewhere! and where better to start than here? someplace people are familiar with, because "here", while not shared equally or equidistantly, is still common enough knowledge that people can feel comfortable with some slight, yet incredibly impactful, alterations. ... though "comfort" in the short-term isn't always the most important thing. I do believe it can be useful sometimes. How are you going to get people to consent to something if they don't think it helps them, and how can you show them that it helps them if it makes them uncomfortable? ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────────┘ --- #17 fediverse/4470 --- ════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────── to be "rich" is to have more than another. if you are happy, they are happiness poor. if you have community, they are alone. if you have serenity, they are chaotic. I am rich in very little but fire in my soul. I have enough in most cases, but I still struggle to pay rent. I am warmed by the pearl my swirling darkness has coalesced into. It nourishes me and keeps me aligned. Never forget your purpose and your truth. It will not abandon you, so long as you do so too. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═════════════════════════════════════════════════════──────────────────────┘ --- #18 fediverse/3834 --- ═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────── ┌────────────────────────┐ │ CW: politics-mentioned │ └────────────────────────┘ some people prepare for revolution like a boy gets ready for a party others do so like a girl packing for a weekend trip to vegas I do it like a kid who forgot the paper was due on monday in 7th period and so spends their entire lunch period writing it (missing 4th in the process because the conclusion paragraph was giving me difficulty) but I think no matter how you do it, we're all just waiting for something to happen. ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────────────────┘ --- #19 fediverse/5410 --- ╔═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════─────────────┐ ║ ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┐ │ ║ │ CW: clothing-stores-mentioned-shopping-mentioned-individual-style-mentioned │ │ ║ └─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────┘ │ ║ │ ║ │ ║ I think it'd be neat if there was a job or social role that involved getting │ ║ to know someone's style and then visiting clothing stores with their │ ║ preferences in mind and shopping for like, 10 people at once. │ ║ │ ║ then they could take the clothes to each person's house and be like "hey, do │ ║ you want this? would it fit you?" and they'd be like "yeah" or "sure" because │ ║ honestly who's gonna say no, that's just rude, its like telling the │ ║ hairdresser your haircut stinks. BUT they'd also say "okay give me your least │ ║ favorites in exchange" and then they'd trade with the clothing stores or │ ║ whatever to try and get people exactly what they like over the course of │ ║ months or years or however long. │ ║ │ ║ I don't like shopping for clothes : ( │ ║ │ ║ some people like taking care of others, and some of those people like shopping │ ║ for clothes. │ ║ │ ║ so I think it'd be neat if there was a way to enable them to help people as │ ║ they'd like, and as the people being helped would like. │ ╟─────────┐ ┌───────────┤ ║ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╚═════════╧══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════──┴──────────┘ --- #20 fediverse/4044 --- ══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════───────────────────────── ┌───────────────────────────────┐ │ CW: re: not about anyone here │ └───────────────────────────────┘ @user-1259 That happens a lot with online people. You can only see one side of them, the side they present to the camera, and so it's difficult to find new ways of looking at them. Hopefully you can find the brighter sides of this person! I'm sure they exist, unless the person is spiralling. Then they'll often be pushing themselves first one way, then the next, but both directions point down... And that produces the ":(" feeling. Good luck! ┌─────────┐ ┌───────────┐ │ similar │ chronological │ different │ ╘═════════╧╧═══════════════════════════════════════════════════────────────────────────┘ |